Choices
by Erinskie
Summary: Scout Curtis must learn at a young age to make the right choices in life. Making the right choices isn't always easy and the consequences can be more harsh than she ever imagined. Follow the Drama! Sister fic 6 of 6
1. Chapter 1

CHOICES 

**_Author's note:_**_ The previous edition of Landslide was "interactive" which is not allowed by so it had to be removed. I do apologize for any reader inconvenience and to I am reposting the completed chapters. For those of you who had reviewed in the past I invite you to leave a new review for the chapters if you would like. Your past reviews no longer exist. _

**_For new readers to this story _**_please note this is a sister story. Landslide is the fourth story entry with a character named Scout Marie Curtis, a.k.a.-Sissy _

**In my brother's gang they often called me by my nickname, Sissy. My oldest brother Darrel actually gave me the name when I was about seven. All of the boys in the neighborhood wrestled and played rough... Darry always told me to get into the game. One day I told him I didn't want to get hurt and he has called me Sissy ever since. For the longest time my parents thought he called me Sissy because I was the little sister. They were not to happy to hear the truth later that Darry was actually teasing me **

_- Story excerpt from Family Bond _

_Scout is the 'seven minutes younger' twin sister to Ponyboy, her intelligence and common sense levels are higher than her twin's yet she is more analytical like Darry and less creative then Pony. She is very quiet and shy and not a "greaser girl". She is tough when she needs to be, but prefers to stay clear of violence whenever possible. She gets along very well with all of her brothers, even Darry. _

_At the beginning of the summer she met a girl named Casey who taught Scout how to be less of a 'tomboy' and more of a woman. Casey and Scout got along as well as Johnny and Ponyboy or Steve and Sodapop. Two weeks prior to Landslide Casey convinced Scout to skip the weekly football game and go to her house to have her nails painted and read woman's magazines. Scout agreed and she became involved in a traumatic family situation in which Casey's father, Duke Dobbins, shot his daughter then turned the gun on Scout. _**"You never heard anything, you never saw anything." Duke said as he stood in the middle of the room and looked down at me. **

**I tried to answer him through my intense fear. "Never … saw …." **

**"Damn straight you didn't." Duke smiled causing his mustache to lift. He raised his hand up revealing the gun. I couldn't take my stare from the darkness of the barrel. Duke pulled back the hammer on the gun. I closed my eye's tight, and shook. In the distance the sound of an approaching squad car caused Duke to curse out loud and flounder in his decision. I opened my eyes to see him pace nervously then he reeled around toward me and pointed the barrel of the gun in my direction, BANG! - **_excerpt from Escalation _

_Scout physically survived the attack on her life, but mentally and emotionally her wounds were still open. Before she could fully recover Ponyboy wandered in past curfew launching the biggest fight Ponyboy and Darry had ever had. In a moment Ponyboy darted out of the house, leaving the family bond in pieces. _

**My heart jumped as Darry struck Ponyboy out of anger. My twin's body was propelled to the floor by the impact. For a second no one in the room drew a breath…Ponyboy leapt up from the floor and bolted out the front door. **

**I wanted to yell to my brother as he ran past, his eyes welling with tears, but all I could muster was a soft spoken call, "Pony?" Before I could speak again Darry and Sodapop ran to the door. I spun around on the couch, propped up on my knees and peeked through the blinds just in time to see my brother disappear into the darkness… **

**"Sodapop, you know I didn't mean too?" Darry began to plead for forgiveness. "I would never mean to hit Ponyboy or any of you. I just reacted." … **

**… I stood before Darry with angry tears flooding my eyes. "You did mean too! …I can't believe I ever stuck up for you! All those nights of telling Pony how much you cared for him were a waste! Ponyboy was right all along, you only kept us two around because Soda wouldn't forgive you if you didn't. You don't really want us here. You never did!" I hurriedly wiped the tears from my eyes wishing I hadn't given Darry the satisfaction of making me cry. **

**"I bet you're happy now that Pony's gone!" For the first time in a long time Darry was speechless. He stood there and his mouth moved slightly but no words could come out. I watched him carefully as he suffocated from my words… It wasn't until that moment I noticed Darry's lip quiver. I looked into his icy cold eyes and saw the whites begin to flood with red. I froze in place and became aware of the unstoppable stream of tears on Darry's face. He was crying. Not just a little, he was ready to break down and cry out loud... - **_excerpt from Landslide_

_The days pass without Ponyboy at home and the family is challenged as Sodapop's hear is shattered, Scout is an emotional wreck and the gang can't get a break as Two-Bit gets jumped and Dally arrested. Finally, Scout realizes she can no longer stay at home waiting for her brother to return. She must go and find him. In the early morning hours she sets out to find him and does so with the unexpected help of Dallas. Her happy reunion with Ponyboy soon goes up in smoke and all four of the friends battle the blazes to save the children and each other. _

**"Ok he's free! He's free, get out of here!" Dallas yelled at me and hoisted Johnny up underneath his armpits to drag him out. **

**I turned to exit the inferno and mistakenly exhaled a large amount of toxic smoke. Gagging for fresh air I stumbled through the burning wood and embers toward the exit before falling to the floor in a fit of coughs. I looked up through the smoke at Dally who leaned Johnny's limp body out the window to be caught by the teachers below. I struggled to stand as cinders singed my hair ... Dally noticed my struggle and grabbed a hold of my sweatshirt as the wooden floor began to lurch beneath us. **

**"Get … out, Scout!" He coughed and yelled as the wind from outside blew through the tattered building causing the fire to swell and the temperature to rise. To shelter me from the raging flames Dallas Winston wrapped me in his arms. With the brightness of the firelight I could see Dally's jacket and arm were badly burned. I turned my head to him in fear and looked into his now protective eyes…When the strong wind passed the flames were reduced and Dally hoisted me off the floor and heaved me out the window. I landed with a thud on the hard ground below and gasped for fresh air. In seconds Dallas was beside me on his hands and knees searching for the same breath as I was and cursing the burnt skin on his arm. Suddenly the sound of gunfire went off and the two of us covered our heads for safety. **

**The sound triggered memories for me that I would have rather forgotten. I tried to stand up in a hurry to flee, but the motion and lack of fresh oxygen made my head swirl and soon the world disappeared into a sea of darkness.**

_Scout returned with her friends to Tulsa and was reunited with her family. The next day she was relieved to have the gang home again, even though things looked glum for Johnny after her, Two-Bit and Ponyboy went to visit him in the hospital. Scout opted to spend the afternoon at the DX station with Sodapop and she was soon reunited with a handsome blond headed boy who had befriended her only days before when she was caught alone in a thunderstorm. _

**I studied Sodapop as he took care of his new customer's car... I cleared my mind and glanced up at the popular blond boy a second time only to have him catch me looking…I watched him approach. I could tell through his fancy clothes and jacket that he was muscular and athletic. "Scout, right?" He took one hand out of the pocket of his jacket and casually pointed at me…It was Owen Jasper from the cemetery. I half smiled as my stomach turned nervous. "Yeah," … **

**Owen plopped down on the curb next to me as if we were good friends. "You weren't in school Friday like you said you'd be." **

**I remembered the day he dropped me off at my house. I told him I would see him at school the next day. "Yeah… I kind of made other plans." **

**"I'll say! I read about you in the newspaper this morning." Owen looked across the lot at his friends then back to me… **

**"O!" The tall redheaded boy in the Lettermen's jacket called out. "We got plenty of girls! Let's go!" **

**Owen looked at me with his ocean blue eyes, "I gotta go. We've got plans for tonight." The boy stood up and looked down at me one last time. "I better see you at school on Monday!" **

**I stood up and looked into his eyes, "you can count on it." I told him with a smile. **

**He walked backwards a few steps to keep me in his sights, "you better be there or I'll be pretty disappointed," then he turned and jogged back to his friends. He hopped into the backseat of the convertible and a few girls piled in around him hoping for attention. My heart fluttered with excitement and I couldn't wait for the weekend to be over.**

****

_But the evening would only end in tragedy for everyone in the gang as Johnny dies, Dallas is shot to death in front of his friends, Ponyboy collapses and Scout loses her mind. _

**The sound of the shots echoed through my mind. I heard Darry berate the officers then Ponyboy mumbled. "… Johnny, now Dallas…" My brother's words caused me to turn toward him, the sound of bullets whizzing through the air, still clear in my ears. I watched him collapse to the pavement. I turned back toward the approaching officers and saw Duke Dobbins standing among them. I saw the smoking gun in his hand and the edges of his black handlebar mustache curl up as he smiled. I convinced myself Duke had killed Dally! He had shot Ponyboy! He had driven Casey from my life. "You bastard!" I screamed with every ounce of energy and hate I had in me. "You killed her! You killed her and now you killed them!" **

**Hot tears flowed from my eyes and each of my muscles filled with rage as I charged at the man. I grabbed a hold of him, punching, kicking and scratching as violently as I could… Quickly his friends grabbed my body and pinned me to the wet street. I struggled to get free but the men seized my arms and pulled them behind my back… Darry watched in shock as the officers wrestled me to the ground. "Let her go! She didn't mean it…!" He begged the policemen, but kept his distance just enough to not anger the officers. **

**"Get her in the car!" One angry officer yelled as he wiped a stream of blood from under his nose. **

**"You can't haul her away!" Two-Bit's voice cracked as he walked up to Darry's side. **

_An ally, Mr. Ottavi, appears and saves Scout from being sent away. Instead, she joins her brother in the hospital for recuperation. She recovers just in time to attend Dallas and Johnny's funeral where she would again meet a boy who would begin to change her life. _

_Owen Jasper stands over six feet tall. His long blond bangs hang just above his ocean blue eyes. From the outside he appears to have everything, money, popularity and, athletic promise. As the quarterback of the high school, social girls flock to him offering anything for his attention. Owen doesn't notice and doesn't care. The one girl in school who intrigues him the most is shy, quiet and a greaser. None of that mattered to Owen he was intrigued by Scout's poise, intelligence and beauty. Scout tried to deny the mutual affection, but eventually the quarterback won. _

**Owen sat back up, so close to me I could feel his breath on my cheek. My heart began to pound as the smile faded from the boy's face…Owen leaned in, his blond bangs swept across my forehead and his warm lips gently kissed mine. Immediately, I kissed him back, long and soft. Inside my chest I swore my heart skipped a beat and every nerve in my body tingled with joy. **_- Story excerpt from Aftermath. _

_Scout and Owen were inseparable after that moment. He was good for Scout and her brother's knew it. She and Owen had more in common then anyone knew. Plus he treated her with respect and gave her courage when she was called to testify against Duke Dobbins. Everything was finally looking for the better for Scout as she an her new boyfriend stopped by the DX to visit with Sodapop. _

**Pulling away from the station I noticed Sodapop pause at the door to watch the two of us drive away…Suddenly, the rumble of a large truck reverberated in my ears. I looked to my right hand side in the direction of the sound. My eyes grew wide at the sight of a large rusty truck grill bearing down on Owen's little sports car. I let out a terror filled scream just before the collision threw my body forward into the windshield. **

**"SCOUT!" Sodapop screamed and ran across the lot to the scene of the accident. He dropped to his knees when he reached the area where my body had laid to rest. There was no response as the blood began seep from my injuries… "Steve call for an ambulance! Call for an ambulance!" **_- Story excerpt from Aftermath. _

_It would take months for Scout to recover, but in that time Owen and her family would grow closer then before. When Owen gathered his friends for a football game, Darry was included. This meant the world to Scout and she knew it meant the world to her brother too.. _

**As I sat alone in the stands, I couldn't help but feel that my parents were there too. I remembered how we would go as a family to Darry's games. Sodapop would vanish into the crowd in the first few minutes. Dad always made us go early so he could be in his favorite seat on the fifty yard line, twenty rows up. Mom would pack bologna sandwiches and a bottle of milk in her picnic basket. Ponyboy and I would sit together. Johnny would often tag along and sit next to Pony. I always sat next to dad and snuggled into his side to keep warm on chilly nights. I remember looking up at my father as he watched. He would chew on a toothpick and tap his foot to keep his anxiety down. He was funny how he would yell to Darry from the stands. Mother would always laugh and look up at him to say, "Darrell, you know he can't hear a word you are saying." **

**My dad would look at her, his blue eyes shining. "I know that Maggie." **

**I sighed deeply and leaned back from the metal rail and watched as Darry ran down the field for a touchdown. He jumped in celebration. I smiled and didn't care how late it got or how cold I was getting. I would sacrifice my comfort for Darry, because he had sacrificed his dreams for me. **_- Story excerpt from Aftermath. _

****_The very beginning of this saga begins with the story Family Bond followed by Coming of Age, Escalation , Landslide, Aftermath and as requested from many many readers-_ Choices_. If you enjoy sister stories or any story that is written well you may just find this series to be amazing, entertaining and able to keep your interest, others have. I hope you enjoy!_

**Disclaimer:** This fanfiction entry is based on the book, The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton. Many of the characters in this story are her creation and I thank her for creating them and allowing so many writers to borrow them for our writing hobby. Many of the characters in this are my original creation as well.

Chapter 1 

With my head tucked inside my locker, I stacked my schoolbooks into the crook of my arm. I felt someone's warm breath on my neck and I seductively questioned. "I thought you had to leave school right away to get to work?"

"Any guy who would leave you for work would be a fool."

The strange voice startled me. I quickly did an about face to find my ex-boyfriend, James, standing directly in front of me. After months in the reformatory, he was a few inches taller than the last time I saw him and his body was thicker with well-defined muscles. "James!" I yelped.

A wide smile graced his face showing his deep dimples. "I see you didn't forget me. I just got back in town."

I immediately worried that someone would get the wrong idea with James so close to me. "James… no … no, I have to go."

James grabbed my arm to keep me from fleeing. His green eyes sparkled with his wicked smile. "Now, what are you running off for?"

Before I could answer, Owen's friends Pete and Alex walked up. Pete stared eye to eye with James and spoke to me. "Scout, is everything okay here?"

James grinned. "Yeah, I was just going to walk the young lady back to her neighborhood. You don't need to worry. Scout and I go way back."

Pete turned his eyes to me. My expression told Pete I had no intention of going anywhere with James. Pete snubbed his nose at the young man. "Why don't you just be on your way?"

James lip curled slightly in disgust as he let go of my arm and pointed to Pete. "Listen here, Soc boy…"

"James!" Another voice cut through the small crowd that was gathering in the hallway. I looked over to find Two-Bit charging towards us. He looked tough in his leather jacket with his cool stare aimed glaringly at the boy. Ponyboy followed behind his friend with a half-nervous look on his face. Two-Bit walked up, put his body between James and me and eyed the intruder. "You were just leaving, weren't you?"

The two young men held their ground and a short stare off ensued. James realized he was outnumbered. He stepped back with an evil grin on his face. "See you around, Scout." James walked backwards down the hall a few feet then turned on his heels and disappeared down the stairs.

"That kid sure is creepy." I said and shut my locker door, a bit embarrassed by the whole scene. I turned around and smoothed the wrinkles in my new pink sweater set that Owen had bought me for my fifteenth birthday.

"You've got a ride home, right?" Alex asked.

"Yeah, she's got a ride." Two-Bit said with an unintended attitude.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Thanks, Alex." I looked to Ponyboy. "Let's get on home, Pony."

"Yeah." He said and wrapped his arm around my shoulder to lead me through the rapidly dispersing crowd. Two-Bit, my brother, and I strolled out to Two-Bit's car, just the three of us. Lately, Steve preferred to ride alone with Evie after school and to my great dismay, Casey had dropped out of school three weeks ago when a full-time position opened up at the restaurant she worked at. I missed my friend.

Walking to Two-Bit's rusty car, I thought again about the night Casey told me she was dropping out of school. The two of us were laying in our beds in the dark. The house had been quiet for quite for a while. Casey whispered to see if I was still awake. I considered not answering, because I was wishing I was asleep, but I couldn't resist responding.

"Casey, if this is about how unfair you think Darry is, I don't want to hear it." I moaned.

Weeks earlier, Sodapop and Darry had the biggest fight I had ever heard between the two of them when he figured out Soda and Casey had been dating and living together under our roof. That day, the yelling was so bad that Ponyboy and I shut ourselves into my room to avoid being drawn into the conflict. Together, we listened to the two of them yell for hours. Darry was livid as he ranted about how careless Sodapop was being with his life. Darry questioned our brother about what he thought the State would do if they found out. How responsible would they consider Darry to be if they knew he was allowing Soda to have a live-in girlfriend while raising two younger children? Sodapop yelled about how he didn't need Darry to take care of him any longer. Soda felt that since he had a job, he could easily find a place for he and Casey, and it would be far away from Darry. They yelled and yelled while Casey sat obediently on the living room couch and watched it all. It wasn't until the two bullheaded boys came to the realization that neither one of them wanted to tear the family apart and risk the chance that Ponyboy and I would be sent away that they finally calmed down. The two of them came to an agreement that Casey would be allowed to stay as long and she and Sodapop kept their relationship quiet. That meant no kissing, cuddling or anything else in our house. The truth was Darry had a real soft spot for Casey. He felt bad for her and was interested in helping her succeed in life.

"It's not about Darry." Casey spoke louder. "It's about me."

I opened my eyes and stared up at the dark ceiling. "What about you?"

"Alright, I'm gonna tell you this, but you can't get mad. Well, you're gonna be mad. That's inevitable, so I guess you can get mad. Just don't yell at me.

"Casey? Quit babbling and tell me already!"

"I'm dropping out of school."

"What?" I sat up and turned toward my friend to scold her. "No you're not! Casey, you've got to finish school!"

"Shhhh!" Casey whispered loudly. "Be quiet or one of your brothers are gonna hear you."

I climbed out of my bed, flipped on the lamp light, and sat on the edge of Casey's bed. "Casey Dobbins, you are staying in school. I'm not going to let you do this."

Casey looked at me and smiled. "See Scout, that's what I love about you. You have the biggest heart in the world. You always know what's best for everyone. I appreciate you wanting me to stay in school, but I've already made up my mind. Plus, the manager at the restaurant offered me a full-time job and I'm gonna take it."

"What for?" I questioned and climbed under the covers with my friend. "High school is so much more important than work. You know you don't need to pay nothing to stay here. Darry has never said that you had to."

"No, he hasn't, and I appreciate everything he has done for me. It just time for me to do something for myself."

"But you're only seventeen! You need to finish high school. You need to stay here with me. Besides, you're practically family."

Casey looked away. "Well, that's the other thing. I just haven't felt happy here since the big fight between Darry and Soda. Then the other day Buck Merrill came in the restaurant and we got to talking. Seems he has that room for rent that Dally used to stay in. He says the rent will be real cheap just for me and he'll let me work the bar whenever I want to for tips and such. I can even use his car if I need to. I told him I'd take him up on his offer, I just aint told Sodapop yet." When she did, I think she broke my brother's heart just a little bit more than he every expected she would.

I shook the away the memory that was playing in my head and climbed into the front seat of Two-Bit's car. I sat in the middle, close to Two-Bit. Being next to him made me feel weird because of the moment we had shared in my dining room when the two of us nearly kissed. I hated feeling that way about him. I just didn't feel the same as it ever did before. We never spoke about that moment, but I think whenever we looked at each other we often thought about it.

Ponyboy slammed the car door shut and looked at me. "I don't know what you ever saw in that boy."

"Me neither." I assured Ponyboy he wasn't the only one with that thought. "James has brought me nothing but trouble, that's for sure."

"Yeah, well I hope he knows enough to leave you alone." Two-Bit scowled and pulled the car out of the school parking lot.

"All he needs is a good whooping from Darry and he'll learn his place." Ponyboy assured the two of us.

"Yeah," Two-Bit sighed. "Either way I think I oughta have a talk with Tim Shepard and make sure he keeps his boy on a short leash."

"Tim aint gonna care what anyone in his gang does." Pony croaked and lit up a cigarette.

Two-Bit glanced at me and then back to the road ahead of us. "He best start caring or there's going to be a turf war."

"Wait!" I interrupted, "you all already had that fight before he left for the reformatory. I though we won and he has to stay away from me for forever? I thought that's how you said it worked!"

Ponyboy and Two-Bit exchanged glances then Two-bit looked to me with concern in his eyes. "Maybe he aint with Sheppard's gang anymore. If that's the case, all deals are off."

I swallowed nervously, "Then I guess we best find out who he's hanging with these days."

"I'll head over to Shepard's place as soon as I drop you two at home, Savvy?" Two-Bit asked.

"Savvy." I replied and sat back into the seat trying not to think about having to deal with James possessive behavior again.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two 

Two-Bit pulled his rusty car up to the curb in front of our house.

"You gotta work at the grocery store tonight?" Ponyboy asked as he opened his car door.

"Yeah, I've been pickin' up some extra hours since Simon quit." Two-Bit shook his head remembering the ex-employee. "Man, that kid was a goober." All of us laughed, remembering Simon's nerdy appearance and the way he would constantly talk about his bottle cap collection.

"Alright, see you in the morning." Ponyboy climbed out of the car and headed up the sidewalk into the house.

I scooted across the vinyl seat to get out of the car. Two-bit grabbed my wrist. "Wait a second Scout." I turned and noticed his round eyes capturing my attention. "Can I talk to you a second?"

I glanced down at his grip and then back to his face. Inside, my stomach fluttered and I braced myself that Two-Bit would want to talk about me and him. I twitched my lip like Ponyboy sometimes does and answered apprehensively. "What's up?"

Two-Bit turned his body towards me, let go of my wrist and laid his arm on the top of the bench seat. His fingers rested dangerously close to my cheek. "I've got to ask you something, and I want you to tell me the truth." My nerves jumped. Two-Bit shifted a little in his seat. "I went to see the school guidance counselor today. He wanted to talk to me about getting out of his school by taking a test of some type."

I exhaled in relief that the topic wasn't about him and I. "You mean the G.E.D.?"

"That's the one." Two-Bit smiled. "I knew you'd know about it. See, the counselor guy says that he doesn't think I'll ever really be able to graduate from high school because I don't have enough time to pass all the classes I need. He told me to try taking this test in a few weeks. If I pass, I'm done. If I don't pass I can keep coming to school and keep trying to pass the test till I do."

I laughed and was glad things between Two-Bit and I seemed to be getting back to normal. Just good friends. "I hear that G.E.D. test is super simple!"

"For you maybe, but we aint all geniuses like you and Pony."

"Two-Bit, I didn't mean it like that. I just mean that I think you are smarter than you give yourself credit for. I know if you put your mind to it you'd be able to pass that test. You put your mind to getting the shift leader position at the grocery store and you accomplished that."

"So you think I should take it?"

"Sure I do. You can't stay in high school forever. You should take the test. Then if you do, maybe Sodapop will too."

My friend nodded his head while he considered the idea a little harder. "I think I will. "Plus the next test aint for a few weeks so I can still be around to be sure James keeps his distance from you."

I smiled at the gesture. "Don't worry about him. He won't be a bother."

"He better not, if he knows what's good for him!" Two-Bit threatened as a familiar car pulled up in front of us.

"Jeepers. What's Darry doing home?" I asked and climbed out of the car as Darry stepped out of our black sedan. I shut Two-Bit's car door and walked towards my brother.

Darry walked between the two cars and waved to our friend. "Hey, Two-Bit!"

"See ya, Darry!" Two-Bit yelled as he put his car into gear and pulled away.

I looked up at my brother. "Darry, is everything alright?"

"Yeah," Darry replied absently, "Is Ponyboy home?"

"Yeah, he's home."

"Come here." Darry grabbed my shoulder with his hand and pulled me along with him to the porch steps where he sat down and patted the porch floor asking me to sit with him.

I sat down and slowly spoke. "Did I do something wrong?"

My brother laughed a little. "Do you ever?"

"I suppose not, but that look on your face has sure got me worried."

Darry looked straight out into the street as he thought of his next words. "Something's come up and I've got to make… we've got to make a decision."

I raised an eyebrow and didn't know how to take the comment. "What are you talking about?"

Darry paused a long time, struggling to find his words. His face grew thoughtful and a little grin formed at the corner of his mouth when he thought he knew what to say. "Remember when I got my football scholarship letter in the mail?"

"Not really."

Darry leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. "Do you remember how sad mom and dad were when they realized that even with my scholarship they were never going to be able to afford to send me to college?'

"I remember mom crying in her room about it." I recalled the helplessness I felt every time my mother would hide herself in her room and cry away her worries. "That night I took her my piggy bank, and told her I would give you ever penny I had. She liked the gesture, but it still wasn't enough."

"See, that's my point." Darry said, confusing me even further because I hadn't figured out his point. "You were willing to do what ever you could to help me get to college. I'm in the same position now." A look of perplexity clouded my face. Not knowing the right words to say, Darry reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded envelope. He handed it to me. "I had a meeting with Principal Leary and your Social Worker today about that letter. Principal Leary said that more than half of the girls who attend get full scholarships to college. He told me that if you were to attend and do as well as you do at Tulsa High, you would too."

I took the letter out of the envelope and read,

_Dear Mr. Darryl Curtis,_

_Here at Ashford Academy for Young Women we pride ourselves in educating the brightest young women in Oklahoma. Our school curriculum is one of the most advanced in the state. It has come to our attention that Scout Curtis is an extremely talented and gifted student who would greatly benefit from the prestigious opportunities and education we can offer. _

_Each semester we contact high schools in Oklahoma searching for intelligent young women who exhibit educational promise. This semester, the administration at Tulsa High School has selected Scout Curtis as a possible school recruit. It was also brought to our attention that your family's financial situation likely cannot afford to give her the opportunity to attend Ashford Academy. Due to Scout's outstanding academic ability, Ashford Academy is offering Scout Curtis a full scholarship including room and board for the remainder of her secondary school years. Our Academy welcomes Scout to join our school year for the next academic quarter, beginning soon. _

_We hope you and your family will take the time to consider this generous offer. We know that Scout will be a great asset to our school, and Ashford Academy will be able to greatly expand the educational opportunities of which Scout can take advantage. _

_Sincerely,_

_Steve Donaldsen_

_Dean of Students_

_Ashford Academy for Young Women _

I blinked my eyes and reread the portion of the letter that said 'room and board'. I scanned the letterhead and noticed the name of a city in southern Oklahoma. My jaw dropped. Darry noticed my shocked expression. "Scout, I think it's a chance of a lifetime, especially for someone from this neighborhood."

"But it's so far away."

"I know, and this is your choice. I'm not going to make you go." My brother turned towards me. "Listen, you don't have to make a decision now. Take a few days and think about it, but remember Scout, this is an awfully big jar of pennies." Darry patted me on the back and stood up to enter the house, but he paused at the door. "Sometimes in life we have to do what is best, even when it's not exactly what we want."

I looked at my brother and knew he spoke of his own commitment to our family. He went inside, but I stayed in shock on the front steps. I began to re-read the letter when Ponyboy's voice in the house broke my concentration. "Darry, why are you home early?"

Darry's voice followed, "I had to go to the high school." My ears perked up but Darry's voice grew soft as if he was being sure that I couldn't hear him.

I looked again at the far away address of Ashford Academy. My nerves grew anxious and I dreaded the idea that Ponyboy would come outside wanting to talk about the Academy. My throat grew tight with sadness. Of all the people I would miss, I would miss Ponyboy the most. I knew I wasn't ready to talk to him. I laid my schoolbooks on the front porch, folded my letter into my hand and briskly walked out of the front gate and down the street. Before I could turn the corner by Johnny's house, I heard Ponyboy call my name from the front porch. I didn't look back, but I was sure he had seen me. I considered running, but it would be useless in my skirt and loafers. Besides, Ponyboy was the fastest runner in the family. I closed my eyes and made a wish that he would stay home and give me time alone to think about everything. When my vision grew dark my ears picked up the fast approaching sound of worn out Converse tennis shoes. There was no escape. Ponyboy would be by my side in seconds. I inhaled deeply to steady my emotions.

"Scout! Wait up! Where are you going?"

"I am… I am headed to the restaurant to see if Casey is working." Really I hadn't been, but now I was.

"Wait up. I'll walk with you." Ponyboy said in a soothing voice.

I didn't tell him no and I didn't tell him yes. I just kept walking and he joined me. The two of us went three blocks without saying a word to each other. That was the unique thing about Ponyboy and me. We rarely had to speak to understand how the other one was feeling and silence never bothered us. By the fourth block, Ponyboy braved to say a few words. "Darry said you might be needing someone to talk to."

I sassed to my brother, "That's why I am going looking for Casey."

Ponyboy shrugged off my rudeness because he could tell something was eating at me. "I'll listen to you."

I squeezed the folded letter concealed in my hand. "I know that. I just don't think this is something I am ready to talk to you about just now."

"Is it a problem with Owen?"

"No, Owen is fine. We're fine." I yelled at my brother, but in the short time I had to think about my future I hadn't remembered to consider Owen. What would happen to us if I left?

"Geez Scout! You don't have to be snappy with me. I'm just here because Darry told me you were going to need to talk, but if he's wrong I've got better things to do then have you mad at me." With that, Pony stopped his stride.

I heard his absence and turned to see him standing his ground. He was staring at me, thumbs hitched inside his beltloops. I sized up my brother with his long hair greased back and his tattered blue jeans. He was the farthest thing from Ashford I could think of and the closest thing to home. My heart sank before I spoke. "I'm sorry, Pon. I'm not meaning to snap at you. It's just ….I got a ton of bad news and a ton of great news all rolled into one and I don't know what to do about it."

Pony walked towards me and gave me a big brother hug. "You could start by telling me what it is, so I can try to help you figure it all out." Suddenly, I felt like Darry. I didn't know the words to say to explain the opportunity, so I handed over the folded envelope and letter for Ponyboy to read.

"What's this?" Ponyboy took the envelope and read the return address. "Ashford Academy? Is this a school or something?"

I frowned. "Just read the letter and you'll see." He took his time reading to himself. When he didn't respond I begged for conversation.

"Well?"

"Well, I don't know. I don't want you to go, but I don't want you to stay either."

His response made me want to half cry and half laugh. "Ponyboy Michael! You are absolutely no help!"

"I realize that." Ponyboy sighed.

"Darry said I don't have to go if I don't want to, but he also said that if I do I'm almost assured a college scholarship. Pony… I'm not ready to leave home, but this might be the one and only chance I have to go to college."

Pony put his arm around my shoulder and pulled the two of us forward walking in the direction we were headed. "Maybe you're right. Let's go find Casey and talk to her about this. She has a way of making tough decisions seem so easy."

"Yeah. I miss her simple way of looking at things. Heck, I just miss her. I think it's been a few days since I've seen or talked to her. You don't think she and Sodapop are having trouble do you?"

"Nah, he was just babbling in bed last night about saving money to buy her a ring."

"A ring! You mean a wedding ring?"

"I don't' know. He didn't say for sure, but I suppose. All he ever talks about is her."

"Who would have ever thought the two of them would have fallen so hard for each other?"


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 

By the time Ponyboy and I arrived at the restaurant, we still hadn't determined if leaving for Ashford Academy was for the better or for the worse. The one thing we knew was that we didn't want to be apart from each other, but maybe we were just delaying the inevitable. We walked into the two-star restaurant and an older waitress walked up to us. "Ya'll just seat yourself and one of us'll be over to getcha order."

"Ma'am," I grabbed her attention as she turned to walk away. "We're wondering if Casey Dobbins was working today."

"Casey?" The woman asked. "You'll find her out back. She's on her break." The waitress winked, turned and wandered back into the kitchen to complete her work.

Ponyboy and I shared a glance, but didn't question the gesture. Together we walked out the front door of the restaurant. Outside, Pony pushed me in the direction of the alley. "That way."

We rounded the corner of the restaurant and looked down the shaded alley lined with old metal trash cans and beat up doorways. A few dozen feet away, the two of us noticed Buck's red Thunderbird convertible with its top down, just the way Dally liked to drive it. I wondered if the car brought back poor memories for Ponyboy the way it did for me.

I hurried to start conversation. "I guess Casey wasn't kidding about Buck letting her drive his car. He must really trust her because I don't even think she has a license."

"What could Buck and Casey possibly have in common?"

"I don't know, rodeos, maybe? She said she used to ride barrels back in New Mexico."

The two of us approached the convertible. I noticed Casey's jet-black ponytail as she lay in the backseat making out with her boyfriend. The two of them were embraced in a passionate moment and his hand was all the way up the skirt of her waitress uniform. I shook my head not believing my own disbelief and giggled. "Would the two of you come up for air? Break time is…."

Casey instantly pushed herself up to a seated position with a look of sheer terror on her face. My eyes met with her eyes and I heard a disappointed "ugh" escape from Ponyboy's lungs. I looked at the boy in the backseat of the car. It wasn't a boy. It wasn't Sodapop.

"Get out of here you little brats before I chase you down and beat you silly," Buck Merrill yelled at us.

Ponyboy grabbed my arm and began to pull me away from the scene. "Let's get out of here." He muttered. I couldn't help but continue to stare at Casey wondering how she could have betrayed my brother. Ponyboy tugged hard enough to pull me from my stance. My feet began to trail his. My mouth hung open as I looked at my friend in disgust and anger began to boil inside of me.

"Scout, wait!" Casey screamed and climbed over the edge of the convertible. "Don't go! It's not what it looks like."

A dozen feet away I pulled loose of Ponyboy's grip, turned towards my friend and screamed back. "What is it supposed to look like? Because it sure looks like you are cheating on Sodapop. My brother!"

Casey panicked at the sound of her boyfriend's name. "Scout, please don't tell Soda. I didn't mean to do this. I didn't know what I was thinking." While she pleaded, Buck climbed into the front seat, fired up the engine and squealed the tires as he pulled away, leaving Casey alone.

"Casey, how dense do you think I am? That was no accident. He had his hand up your skirt!"

Tears formed in Casey's eyes. She begged for forgiveness. "I know… I'm so sorry, Scout. You have to believe me. I don't know what I was thinking."

Ponyboy snarled, "I doubt that. Come on, Scout." My brother pulled my arm again and I turned and walked away with him.

Casey ran to us. She grabbed my free arm and cried out in desperation. "Scout, please don't tell Sodapop. Let me tell him. I will apologize and tell him everything. I promise. Please just give me another chance."

Angrily, I yanked my arm from her grip. "I came here because I needed a friend to talk to. I thought I could trust you. I thought you were my friend, but obviously, I was wrong!" Having said what I needed to say, I turned and hustled away from her.

"I am still your friend! We are best friends," Casey yelled as tears streamed down her face. "You are my best friend! What happened here has nothing to do with you."

I turned back and pointed angrily at her. "This has everything to do with me. You know how I feel about my brothers. They are all I have, and I will not stand here while you betray one of them!"

"But we had a pact! We promised each other to stay friends no matter what." Casey stood in the alley and yelled to me as I continued walking away. "I was stupid. I made a mistake. Is that what you want to hear?"

Her voice echoed through the alley, but I ignored the comment. Ponyboy and I turned the corner and didn't look back. I was angry, frustrated, and heartbroken, all in the same moment.

Ponyboy fumed. "You don't need a friend like that, Scout. No one treats Sodapop like that. He ain't never hurt anyone and he never would. She's no friend."

"Why would she do this to him?" I rambled, not paying full attention to Ponyboy voicing his thoughts.

"Soda said he loved her. He fought with Darry for her. Soda never fights with Darry."

"How long has she been having an affair with Buck Merrill? Yuck!"

"Sodapop is going to skin someone when he finds out."

I heard my brother's comment and I stopped. Wide eyed, I looked to my brother. "How are you going to tell him?"

Ponyboy stopped and looked back at me. "Oh no… don't look at me. I ain't telling him."

"Pony, we can't not tell him!"

"You tell him! She was your friend," Ponyboy reasoned as he fished around in his pockets for a cigarette and a lighter.

I became defensive. "Just because Casey was my friend doesn't mean I'm the right person to tell Soda. This is going to kill him. First Sandy, now Casey. You two are close…you should tell him."

"I aint telling him!" Ponyboy took a moment, rubbed his forehead as if he was clearing away a headache, and then sighed. "We've got trouble enough. Let's not fight about this."

"What are we going to tell him?" I whined.

Ponyboy hitched his thumbs into his belt loops. "We'll tell him his girlfriend is a two-timing broad."

I looked over at my brother and rolled my eyes. He was kind of right, but I really wasn't interested in putting Casey in the same category as greaser girls like Silvia or Cindy. I shoved my hands into the pocket of my skirt and complained. "Why us? Why our family? Life isn't supposed to be this hard, is it?"

"I don't know, Scout."

There was a long pause between us as we walked down the street past the barber shop and clothing stores. I looked at my reflection in the window and noticed Ponyboy and I appeared as one. It was just the way the two of us had always felt together. Apart we were halves, but together we made sense.

"I'm not going."

"What?" My brother asked, not sure what I was talking about.

"I'm not going away to the Academy. Being here with my family is more important. I can't be hours away when something like this happens." I looked to my brother to find a sign of approval but there was none. "What?"

Ponyboy took a long drag on his cigarette. "I was just thinking the opposite. I was thinking you should go. You should get out of here and get yourself that college scholarship."

"But I'll be so far away! I can't be that far away."

"I don't want you to go, but you have to. Somehow I think it would be what Mom and Dad would want. They wouldn't want you here dealing with this."

"Ugh!" I threw my head back in frustration and tears began to well up in my eyes. "I wish we could just talk to them. You know…I can handle them not being here, but I can't handle not knowing what they think would be best."

"You already know what they would want you to do," Ponyboy said.

"What?"

"They would want you to do what felt best in your heart. It's got to be a decision you can live with, and I don't think years from now you will be able to live with yourself if you never tried for the scholarship. You would regret it every day of your life."

I swallowed hard and felt a little sick to my stomach. Ponyboy was right, and I hated that.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four 

Ponyboy and I slowed the pace of our walk as we approached the DX gas station where our brother worked. From a distance, we watched him grin and lean up against the side of the pole that held the large awning overhead. We still hadn't decided who would be the one to break the news to him. My lingering affection towards Casey dwindled further. I hated Casey for putting the two of us into this predicament.

Sodapop finished filling the gas tank and put the hose back into the pump. He collected the cash from the customer and looked our way. "Hey, you two! Where are you headed from?" Ponyboy and I looked at each other and simultaneously our hearts began to race with nervousness. We looked back to see Sodapop walking towards us. The wide smile on his face only made the information we had to tell him that much more painful to say. "Does Darry know you two are out walking around?"

"Yeah, he knows." I said uneasily as we stopped in front of the open garage door. Ponyboy and I glanced at each other again. My twin slumped his posture and stared at the ground as a way to say he wasn't going to speak up. Our brother noticed.

"What gives?" Sodapop questioned and stuffed the dirty rag he was holding half into his front pocket. I didn't speak. Ponyboy refused to look up. After a long pause, Sodapop began to guess. "Did you two get into some kind of trouble or something?"

Before we could answer, Steve walked out of the open garage stall door. "Hey, Hobos! Don't be looking to bum a ride home off your brother. Evie's coming by in a little bit and the three of us are going over to have Casey serve us dinner. Soda here says he'll save us some money by tipping her later." The two friends elbowed each other and laughed.

Ponyboy and I didn't laugh.

Sodapop stopped. "Seriously, what is bothering the two of you?"

I frowned hard and felt hot tears of frustration well up in my eyes. "Sodapop, I'm sorry…" My words were cut short as a car rapidly pulled into parking lot and squealed its tires to a stop. Casey emerged from the passenger's side of the car.

Sodapop beamed with affection. "Hey, we were just talking about you."

Casey shot a look of contempt at Ponyboy and I then she turned her red and swollen eyes to our brother. She figured from his cheerful demeanor that we hadn't told him what we had seen. "Soda, I didn't want it to happen this way. I wanted to tell you…" Casey began to cry. When our brother tried to wrap her in a comforting hug, she pushed him away. "No. No you can't. I just have to tell you something and then I'll be gone."

"Gone? What are you talking about? What is going on around here?" Sodapop questioned and looked to everyone for some sort of answer to his confusion.

Casey struggled to take a deep breath then her voice cracked. "I don't love you anymore."

A stunned Sodapop searched for clarification. "What are you talking about?"

"I just wanted to be the one to tell you. Goodbye, Sodapop."

Casey tried to leave, but Sodapop grabbed a hold of her arm to stop her. "Is this because of Darry and I fighting? I told you that is all over. If this is about that, I can fix it."

"No Soda. There's nothing to fix. I've felt this way for awhile, but I didn't know how to tell you," Casey cried out. "Please just let me go."

The pitch of Sodapop's voice raised and I knew he was close to tears as he pleaded. "What did I do wrong?"

"It's not you, it's me. I just…" Casey looked at me in anguish as she recalled getting caught not being faithful. "This isn't right anymore."

"It can still be right! It is still right. Please, Casey…." Sodapop implored to no avail.

Casey pulled loose. "I can't Soda. It's not who I am. I'm just not the kind of girl you need." With the last word, Casey ran to the waiting car, climbed in and the car squealed the tires as it pulled out of the parking lot. She didn't look back.

Beaten down by the news, Sodapop struggled to suppress his sorrow. Ponyboy and I stood in shock like idiots. We hadn't ever anticipated Casey rushing in at the last second and telling Sodapop she didn't love him. Angered by our lack of response, Steve swooped his buddy into a one arm hug and pulled him into the garage where he could regain his composure.

Dumbfounded, Ponyboy and I waited outside a few minutes to give the friends a moment to talk. When we walked into the garage to join them we heard Steve talking caringly to his best friend. "Buddy, I am sorry. Don't worry about it though. Maybe she's right. Maybe she ain't the right girl for you."

"You think?" Sodapop tearfully questioned. "We always got along fine."

"Sure, Soda. Ya'll got along fine, but it was more like brother and sister than boyfriend and girlfriend. Besides, if she had been the right girl, none of this would have happened," Steve answered matter-of-factly.

"I'm gonna get her back." Sodapop wiped the tears from his eyes. "I'm going to find out what I did wrong and she'll be mine again."

Steve didn't agree, but he was Sodapop's best friend so he said what a best buddy should. "Yeah… you do that, Soda."

Ponyboy stepped toward our brother and questioned, "Soda, you going to be all right?"

"I'd be doing a lot better if the women that I loved weren't always leaving me." Soda forced a smile and looked at me. "At least I still have you. Huh, Scout?"

"Yeah Soda…you got me, babe," I said and forced a smile of my own as thoughts of the academy flew through my mind.

"You wouldn't lie to me, would you?" Sodapop asked.

I hesitated before answering. "No, I wouldn't lie."

Seeing trouble brewing, Steve spoke up. "Why don't you cut out of here a little early?" Steve graciously offered. "I'll punch you out."

"Yeah, I think I'll do that." Soda said and looked at his dirty hands and then to Pony and me. "Why don't you two head on out to the truck and I'll meet you out there after I wash up." We quietly agreed and headed out to the parking lot as Sodapop left to wash his hands.

Once Sodapop was out of earshot, Steve walked up behind Ponyboy and I and threw his greasy hands onto our shoulders. He squeezed hard in frustration. "Okay you two, spill it"

"Spill what?" Ponyboy said convincingly.

"You know what. You two knew Casey was coming here to break up with him. I saw Sissy welling up with tears before that car even pulled into the station! So spill it."

Neither one of us could bear to tell Steve what we saw. Besides, if he knew the truth Steve may have half a mind to track Casey down and tell her off. Or worse, he might tell Sodapop everything. Ponyboy and I exchanged another glance swearing to withhold the truth from both of them. Steve noticed.

"I hope you two Bobbsey twins are happy with yourselves! It ain't right not to tell Soda the truth, whatever that is." Pissed off, Steve turned and headed back to the garage and yelled out once more. "It ain't right!"

My brother and I walked across the DX lot to the truck. Pony opened the door. I climbed in and he followed. Upset, I started to bawl. "I'm not leaving, Ponyboy. I can't go. It's not fair to Sodapop. _We're_ not being fair to Sodapop. I know Darry is going to be livid, but I can't be one of the girls that Soda loved who left him. I can't have that on my conscience. You know?"

"I know. I heard him." Ponyboy said with disappointment in his voice. He rubbed hard at his forehead. Pony knew there wasn't much he could say to make things better for me. Either choice I made was going to have a negative impact on me. "I wish I had the right answer for you, Scout. I really do, but there is no way you can make your decision without someone getting hurt."

"I know, and that is the most frustrating part."

Ponyboy looked out the back window of the truck and saw our brother coming. "Hush your crying. Soda's coming and he doesn't need to be hearing it."

I did my best to sit up straight and repress my sorrow and fears. I looked away as Soda climbed into the truck. He slammed the car door shut and stared straight forward. He didn't put the key into the ignition. Ponyboy looked out the passenger window and nudged me slightly. We were trapped, Soda was furious and we all knew it. A silent minute passed before Sodapop spoke up in disappointment. "I thought of all the people in the world you two would at least be truthful with me." My twin and I swallowed hard. "Steve told me he told you two to spill what you knew and you wouldn't. Now I'm telling you to spill it!"

I looked at Ponyboy sitting by the door. He kept his gaze fixated on something outside of the truck.

Sodapop startled us both as he slammed his hands against the steering wheel and yelled, "Damn it! Just tell me what in the hell you two were going to tell me when you showed up here!"

The boisterous voice out of Soda's mouth startled us both. He rarely yelled. His anger resonated in the thick air.

Ponyboy muttered, "She was with another guy."

"What?" Sodapop questioned in disbelief.

"We went to see her at the restaurant and we found her in the back alley with another guy."

"Who?" Soda yelled the question. His hands began to tremble with rage.

Ponyboy and I shared a look and planned to keep the identity a secret.

"Who was she with?" Sodapop yelled in insistence, but Pony and I refused to divulge the truth. Soda waited longer than he wanted to, then his frustration erupted. I watched as he turned the key and revved the engine. Without warning, he slammed the truck into reverse, squealed the tires and backed out into the street. Furious he shifted the truck into gear and recklessly sped down the street.

My heart began to pound in fear as the truck bounced over pot holes and whizzed by people and buildings. Worried, I grabbed the back of the truck seat with one hand and braced myself against the dashboard with the other. "Sodapop, would you please slow down?"

Soda didn't answer and Ponyboy reissued the request. "Slow down, Soda!"

"Not until you tell me who." Sodapop insisted as his eyes leaked tears of pain. He yanked at the wheel and forced the truck around the corner at a high rate of speed. The cab of the truck tilted as it balanced on two wheels and the tires screamed around the corner.

"Slow down! You're gonna kill us!" I cried out.

"Tell me who he was!" Sodapop screamed.

Ponyboy looked over at our brother in distress. "Slow down before someone gets hurt."

"Tell me who!" Our brother screamed back.

Fearing the upcoming corner, I disregarded my vow of secrecy and shrieked,

"Buck Merrill!"

Instantly, Sodapop slammed on the brakes throwing Ponyboy and I forward into the dashboard. The truck idled in the middle of the road. Soda fumed. "How do you know that?" We didn't answer until Soda yelled again. "How do you know that?"

"We saw them together in his car." I answered meekly wishing I could have kept the secret.

"Get out of the truck!" Sodapop commanded as he stared straight forward.

I sat back on the seat and questioned. "What are you going to do?"

"Get out of the truck!" Sodapop growled and revved the engine to warn us that if we stayed we were along for the dangerous ride.

Ponyboy opened the metal door and stepped out of the truck. He stood in the street and held the door wide open for me. I took a moment to glance at my angry brother's profile. I knew the thoughts in his head were bound to be disastrous. I couldn't let him follow through with his dark thoughts. I took a deep breath. "I can't let you do this." As fast as possible, I pushed the gear shifter into neutral, turned the key backwards and snatched them from the ignition.

It took a second for Soda to realize his plans had been foiled. Then his rage surfaced. "Give me back those keys!"

In fright, I scrambled across the seat and out the passenger door with Sodapop grabbing at my back. I pulled loose from his grip and took off running across the park.

"Damn it, Scout! Get back here!" Sodapop snarled and he fell out of the truck onto the road.

Ponyboy watched in confusion as Sodapop scampered to his feet to chase after me. In my skirt and loafers, I wasn't able to pick up enough speed to outrun him. In seconds, Sodapop caught up to me and shoved me to the ground. I landed hard on the grass and Sodapop landed on top of me. I held the keys to the truck tight in my hand. Sodapop pulled at my sweater and arms trying to retrieve them. "Give 'em here! Just give them here and I'll let you go." Soda pressed his body against mine making it hard to breathe and even harder to keep the keys from him.

"Knock it off, Soda!" Ponyboy yelled and pulled Sodapop halfway off of me. Knowing I couldn't hide the keys any longer I used the short break to whip the keys over my head as far as I could. All three of us watched the shiny metal pieces fly a half a dozen feet through the air and land in the park fountain with a simple 'kerplunk.'

All three of us stared in disbelief. The keys were in the fountain - the very fountain where Ponyboy was nearly drowned. Our mouths hung open in unison as we sat together in a pile on the ground. The pounding of our hearts echoed in our ears and the only sound seemed to be the exhausted panting of our breath. Soda stood up first and wiped his dirty hands on his jeans before offering his hand to me and then to Ponyboy. Collectively, we stood another moment staring at the fountain.

Sodapop sniffled hard and wiped his nose. It was bleeding, but to him it wasn't the biggest problem we had. All three of us walked up to the edge of the fountain and stood in the very spot where Bob had laid dead for hours on that weekend night. The blood droplets from Soda's nose splattered on the ground leading us to recognize faint remnants of the bloodstain that had flooded the area.

Ponyboy's voice was apprehensive when he spoke. "Someone is going to have to go in there to get the keys." We looked at each other. No one moved.

I stared into the water. I hated the fountain and the devastating memories that it conquered in my mind. I exhaled, "I'll get them. I threw them in there." Sodapop and Ponyboy looked at me wide eyed. I could tell they both hated the ominous fountain too. I slid off my loafers, hiked up my skirt and climbed over the rim of the fountain. I flinched when my foot entered the cold water.

"Careful, Scout." Soda suggested quietly. All three of us acted as if the fountain were nothing more than a monster just waiting to claim its next victim.

Gingerly, I put my other foot in the water and waded through the fountain water to the middle where the keys laid at the bottom. The water was too deep for me to reach in without soaking the arm of my sweater, so I picked the keys up with my toes. As soon as I could grab them I held them tight in my hand.

"Come on Scout! Get out of there," Ponyboy yelled with concern.

My heart pounded as I turned to leave. I took a few steps, but then lost my footing on the painted, slippery surface below. Instantly, the water flooded above my head. I held tight to the keys with one hand and pushed myself out of the water with the other.

"Scout!" I heard Soda scream in fear as he climbed onto the rim of the fountain and reached out his hand to me. "Hurry up and get out of there!" I treaded through the freezing water and clambered over the edge with my brother's help.

"Are you okay?" Pony asked, concerned.

"Yes, I'm fine. I've got the keys." I said and stood dripping in the cool breeze. I opened my hand to reveal them.

No one grabbed for them. Instead we stood silently by the side of the fountain. I began to shiver and spoke for the group. "Divine intervention?"

"Yeah, something like that." Soda said softly. He threw his warm dry arm around my shoulder. "Come on, Sissy, let's get you home."

As a team, we walked back to the truck and Soda drove us home, slowly.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five 

No one spoke a word on the ride home.

Sodapop pulled the truck to a stop outside of our house. With all that had happened, no one was particularly eager to get of the truck, because the first one inside would have to face Darry and explain the events of the afternoon. Soda killed the engine leaving and awkward silence in the air. I turned to look at the front window of the house and my eyes caught with Sodapop's eyes. Soaking wet, I spoke up before he could. "Listen Soda, for what it's worth, I am sorry about what Casey did to you. It's not right and it's not fair."

Soda thought a moment then gave me a comforting smile. He blinked away a few silent tears and turned towards Pony and me. "I hear you Scout, and I am sorry I lost my temper with you two. I really lost my cool, but you didn't. If you hadn't grabbed the keys, I'd probably have done something stupid. You guys didn't let me." I leaned forward and hugged my older brother. It felt good to give him a bit of comfort, even though he had to get a little wet to accept it.

Ponyboy looked at the house and groaned. "You two know Darry is sitting in there waiting for the three of us to get home. So which one of us is going to have to tell him about all of this?"

Soda laughed at our brother and reached over to playfully punch him. "Ponyboy, you worry too much!" Sodapop meant what he said, but he didn't fear Darry's opinion the way Pony did. Soda also didn't know what Ponyboy knew. Darry sent him outside a few hours ago hoping Ponyboy would convince me to choose to go to Ashford Academy. Pony was coming in to face Darry with no accomplishment. We climbed out of the truck and headed into the house. Soda led the way, naturally.

I walked through the front door behind Sodapop and saw that Darry had set the dining room table with bread and a hot kettle of soup. He stood by the kitchen door trying to look casual, but he was really just anxious to hear my answer about attending the Academy. As usual, with the three of us under his wing, he got more than he bargained for.

The smile faded from my oldest brother's face as he watched the three of us file solemnly into the house. "What happened?" Undoubtedly, our brother's mind drifted to the events of the past year and the variety of unbelievable answers we might have in store for him. I sighed hard and kicked off my loafers into a pile with Soda's shoes by the end of the couch. Searching for answers, Darry walked into the living room.

Soda grimaced and spoke with bloodshot eyes. "You'll be happy to know Casey broke up with me today. Seems she's found someone else, but hey, misery loves company, right?" Soda wandered past Darry and slapped him on the back hard enough to make a loud slapping sound.

Darry didn't flinch from the hard hit. Instead, his face frowned and he turned around to face our brother. "Little buddy, I am sorry to hear that."

Soda grabbed a slice of bread from the table and hissed, "Save it, Darry! I know how much you didn't want us together."

"You know that is not true!" Darry stood tall and defended himself.

"Yeah, right," Soda argued.

"Soda, this is exactly what I was talking about!" Darry argued back, referencing an earlier discussion that Pony and I were not privy to. "I don't know why this is a surprise to you. I've told you this before! This is Casey Dobbins we are talking about! She is the most free loving, boy chasing girl we know. You knew that about her long before the two of you ever hooked up. I'm right, aint I Scout?"

My eyes grew wide at the question. I wanted to stay out of the conversation. I avoided answering by staring blankly at Darry the way Ponyboy often did.

Seeing I wasn't going to confirm his statement, Darry softened his tone of voice. "Listen little buddy, I know how quickly you get attached, but Casey is only sixteen years old and you are only seventeen. You're both too young to be falling in love."

Sodapop walked by Darry again and flopped on the couch. "Me? You think I'm too young. What about Scout and Owen?"

I looked at Soda with a sour face. "What are you dragging me into this for?"

"You and Owen are in love and you are way younger than me. I don't hear Darry preaching to you. It's cause Owen is a Soc, isn't it Darry? He gives us a car. You give him our sister." Soda shoved a chunk of bread into his mouth. Funny thing about boys, no matter how bad life gets there is always time for food.

"Soda!" I was offended by his comment.

"Knock it off! Both of you," Darry interjected. "You know, of all of you, Ponyboy is the only one who shows any sense at all with this subject. I think if Pony were dating too, it'd be the death of me." Pony let a tiny grin slide onto his face.

Sodapop looked to the ceiling and blurted out, "Darry, you're just bitter."

Darry shot a cold glare to our cocky brother. When he had made his silent point, Darry unexpectedly turned his frustrations to me. "Sissy, why is it Soda loses a girlfriend and you come home soaked to the bone?"

"It's a long story, and I am wet. I'm going to change my clothes," I said and quickly left the conversation that I didn't want to be a part of anyway.

Darry didn't hold me up, so I headed back to my room to change into warm sweatpants and a t-shirt. I sat on the edge of my bed and was pulling on a dry pair of socks when someone knocked on my bedroom door. "Come in."

I looked up. Darry entered the room, dressed in blue jeans and a white muscle t-shirt, and shut the door behind him. With a bit of a negative manner, he asked me, "Sissy, I'd love to know how you go from sitting on the front porch contemplating the decision of a lifetime to standing wet and dirty in the middle of the living room."

I looked at Darry, a little miffed that he always made his life all about us and never about him. I answered back with the same attitude he was giving me. "I'd love to know what Soda was talking about."

Darry raised his eyebrows in question. "What?"

"You know- misery loves company; you're just bitter." I acted on a hunch. "So… how's Kathryn been?"

Darry's lip tensed with anger for a second and then he frowned. He knew he had been caught keeping a big secret from me. His tall body slumped it's posture, and at that moment I wished I hadn't asked the question in such a snotty way. I exhaled a little and asked with empathy, "Not too good, huh?"

Darry sat down on the other bed and rested his elbows on his knees, "To be honest with you, not too good. I didn't really know how to tell you, but she's moved on, Scout."

The remaining pieces of my heart, already broken by the sadness over the Sodapop and Casey fiasco, were shattered at the news. "What happened?"

"It's simple really. She told me she loved me, but I couldn't say it back to her. For some reason, I just didn't feel it was the right thing to tell her, so she moved on." Darry shrugged his shoulders. "Another guy, without three kids to take care of, caught her eye." A guilty lump formed in the middle of my throat and the scowl on my face must have shown it. Darry looked at me with sadness. "Don't worry about it, Sissy. I can't have the luxury of falling in love. I have my hands full with court cases and car accidents and trying to make the best decisions for each of you. Or at least trying to get you to understand you need to make the best decision for yourself."

My eyes peeked over at him and I furrowed my brow. "I know."

"Scout, I know it's not fair to you, but you need to realize that more than anyone else in this house you are going to need to grow up the fastest. You are so smart and have such a future ahead of you that you can't stay stuck here with us."

I sighed hard and looked into my brother's ice blue eyes. "That's kind of ironic coming from you. Isn't it?"

"Yeah, just a bit," Darry said slowly. "You know what baby girl?"

"What?"

"For almost everyone, there comes a time in life when you've got to do what you don't want to do, but you have to."

A tiny smile pierced my lips. "That's true, Darry."

He grinned back at me and raised his eyebrows. "What?"

"If I have to be honest with myself, then you have to be honest with yourself. I think you should call her again and tell her how you really feel."

Darry stood up and looked down at me. "She's moved on, Scout."

"No, she hasn't, and neither have you. If you call her and tell her how you really feel, I'll give the academy some serious thought." Darry looked at me with disappointment, but I knew I had his attention. "We're all pretty grown up around here. We don't need you that badly."

"I'll give it some thought. But with the bad luck we boys have been having with girls I don't know that it would do any good." Darry reached over and tussled my damp hair. "I am still waiting to hear how you ended up all wet."

"To make a long story short, I got in a fight with Sodapop."

"What for?"

"He was really upset when he found out that Ponyboy and I caught Casey making out with Buck."

"Buck?" Darry's voice was filled with disbelief. "Are you talking about Buck Merrill? What is going on in that girl's head? Buck is a grown man and she is only sixteen years old!"

"Not to mention she already had a boyfriend."

"I know," Darry said with frustration. "I know." Darry sat back on the other bed and looked at me. "How did the two of you tell him she had been caught cheating?"

"We didn't. We went to the DX station to tell him, but before we could say anything, Casey pulled up in a stranger's car and told Soda herself. Then she left him and drove off."

"How did Soda take it?"

"Pretty rough, but Steve was there to help him out, so Pony and I didn't say much."

"If you all were at the DX, how did you manage to get soaking wet?"

"That happened on the way home. Sodapop got in the truck and was pissed because he figured out we knew more about Casey then we were telling him. He snapped and screamed at us for not being honest. He really lost it, Darry. Driving home he was speeding and crying and yelling at us to tell him who the other man was. He finally beat it out of us by scaring the living daylights out of us. When we told him it was Buck, I thought he was going to go and kill the two of them right then. That's when I pulled the keys out of the ignition and took off running through the park. Soda wrestled me to the ground and tried to get the keys back, but I accidentally threw them in the fountain. I went in the water to get them and slipped getting out." I thought a second about the moment I went underwater. "Or at least… I think I slipped."

"What do you mean, you think you slipped?" Darry asked.

I shrugged my shoulders and spoke quietly. "I slipped, or maybe … maybe I was pushed."

"Who would have pushed you?"

"Bob Sheldon…. Maybe?"

"That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard," Darry stated. He didn't believe in anything like the supernatural or things that were non-scientific. I sometimes wondered if he really believed me that I had seen Mom and Dad when I was in the coma. Darry ran his hand through his hair and shook his head. "You and Ponyboy are two of the most imaginative people I know. You are unbelievable."

"Well, whether it was me being clumsy or something else, it was the perfect thing for Soda. Being in the park reminded us of Johnny and Dallas and how good we have it that we have each other. So instead of going after Buck, Soda calmed down and came home with us."

Darry lowered his head and sighed heavy. "Casey… Casey… Casey." He picked his head back up. "I feel like I should do something. She's too young to be with an older man like Buck."

"What could you do?"

"I could go and get her and bring her home."

"Here? What about Sodapop?"

"What about your best friend? She's got no one, Scout. I never told you this, but I called New Mexico a few weeks ago to talk try to talk to Mary Lynn about having Casey go home, but the phone number was disconnected. She is alone, just like Dally was."

My chest felt heavy with sorrow as I thought about my best girlfriend without anyone in this world other than that shifty man, Buck Merrill. I didn't want that for her. I loved her too much. I swallowed hard. "Darry, I think you are right, but Casey can't come here. Soda isn't ready for that. I don't think I am ready to see her either."

"I know," Darry said and stood up. "I just don't like the idea of her being with Buck. Nothing good can come of that." Darry walked over and pulled my bedroom door open. "Come on. Soup's getting cold and I am getting hungry." Darry walked out of the room and left me alone.

I reached down to the floor and picked up my wet skirt. I reached my hand into the pocket and pulled out the letter from Ashford Academy. I took it out of the envelope. Carefully unfolded the page and laid it on my dresser to dry. I looked once more at the address in southern Oklahoma.

I didn't want to go.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter six 

The blinds in my room were turned slightly upward to let in the moonlight. Ever since I moved to my new room, I preferred it that way. I had never really gotten used to the room, even when Casey lived with us. I always felt alone in the bedroom at the end of the hall. I missed the comfort of being right outside of Darry's room. He was strong and offered the kind of protection I didn't feel I could get from my other brothers who were across the hall from me now.

Tonight the light in the room seemed brighter than usual, or maybe it was due to my eyes being wide open for the past hour. Either way, I couldn't lull myself to sleep. My mind raced with question about Soda's heartache. When I wasn't thinking about him, my mind thought about the possibility of having to leave for a school I didn't want to be at. I wished I had been able to talk to Owen tonight. When I called him earlier, there was no answer at his home. I looked forward to seeing him in the morning at school. I also wished I had the time to talk to Soda about Ashford Academy before bed, but his heart was broken enough without me telling him about the possibility of my leaving too. Not to mention Steve and Two-Bit showed up right after dinner to take him out to get his mind off of his troubles. Worst of all, I wished I had my best girl friend to talk to, but sadly life seemed to circle around. Casey was the source of the first problem on my mind.

I tossed over to my side and closed my eyes. Across the hall, I heard a faint whimpering sound. Sodapop, poor guy. I climbed out of my bed and tip toed into his room. Inside, he had his back to the door, so I gently called his name. "Sodapop?" I sat on the edge of his bed.

Soda rolled towards me with a large frown on his face and tried not to cry too loud. "I miss her, Scout."

I frowned with him and tried to find something good to say. "Don't worry Soda. You are a great guy and there will be plenty of other girls." Soda sat up and struggled to control his cries. "Not her. I miss Mom!"

My eyebrows raised and my heart sank. "Me too." I muttered and hugged my brother tightly. Ponyboy stirred next to us. I looked at Soda and whispered. "Let's go to my room so we don't wake Ponyboy up." Soda nodded head in agreement. He climbed out of his bed, and slid on a pair of jeans that had been lying on the floor. He left them unbuttoned as the two of us walked into my room and sat on my bed in front of the slightly open blinds.

"I could really use a few good words from Mom and Dad myself." A memory flashed through my mind. "I completely forgot to tell you and Darry that James bothered me at school today."

"James?" Soda questioned and sniffled back his emotions. "You mean that kid that runs with Shepard's gang."

"Yeah, that one. He came up to me after school today and trapped me by my locker. He was kind of threatening me."

"Did he hurt you?" Sodapop straightened his posture a little and grew slightly concerned.

"No, there were a lot of people around, couple of Owen's friends and then Pony and Two-Bit came in and sent him on his way."

"That doesn't sound so bad."

I frowned a little. "I know it didn't sound like much, but it was eerie feeling. There was just something about the way he smiled at me and told me he'd see me around. It felt like he was threatening me."

"I'll tell you what. He better think twice about laying a hand on you. If I see him around here, he'll be wishing he was back in reformatory school."

"Thanks, So." I leaned my head back against my headboard and let my eyesight wander through the slits of my blinds. Outside, I noticed a dark figure in the gray moonlight. Immediately, my nerves grew tense. I jumped to my feet and backed up into the center of my room. I whispered in fright. "Soda, I think there is someone out there."

Sodapop pivoted on the bed and lifted a few slats to see out the window. Without a word he dropped the slats of the blinds then motioned to me. "Stay here."

"Did you see someone?" I whispered to him, but he ignored me and hustled towards the back door. Not wanting my brother to have to go alone, I followed close behind him. He didn't call me off as our bare feet pattered across the wooden porch floor. Soda raced through the screen door and ran toward the shadowy figure who seemed to be hiding underneath my bedroom window. He grabbed the intruder and pulled the person to the ground. "I'm gonna skin you!" Soda cocked his fist to throw a punch, but he held off as he heard a voice beg for him.

"Sodapop don't! It's me. It's Casey. Please, don't hurt me."

Sodapop lowered his fist and his demeanor shifted to one of concern. His fingers loosened their grip on Casey's bicep, but didn't let go. His eyes struggled to adjust to the darkness. "Casey? What are you doing here?" My brother asked hoping to hear the she had come for him. He helped her up from the ground.

"I didn't come to see you. I wanted to talk to Scout." Casey brushed off her shirt and nervously looked my way.

"We don't have anything to talk about!" I said, defending my brother's pride as best as I could.

"That's not true. You and I have everything to talk about. You are my best friend, and I don't want things to be bad between the two of us. We've been through so much together we are practically family."

I looked at my friend standing next to my brother, totally oblivious to the way he cared about her. Her absence of emotion for Sodapop's feeling made me angry. "We were a family, and you chose to break it up. So there is nothing to talk about." I motioned to my brother. "Come inside Soda, before you catch a cold."

"Wait! Scout you are not being fair. We had a pact. Friends forever, remember? You can't just walk away." Casey began to snivel. "I can't lose you. And I can't go on lying to Sodapop. I don't love him like I thought I did." Casey turned her teary eyes to my brother. "I mean… I did love you, but things have changed. In the beginning things were just so intense. With Scout being in the hospital and the trial and stuff, I really needed someone to show me that they cared about me. Once things got back to normal, I just didn't feel the same way. I tried, but I just couldn't."

Sodapop stared at Casey awhile as if her words were sinking in. Tears welled up in his eyes and his muscles slumped as he backed away from Casey. "I would have loved you forever. Hours ago I would have even begged you to stay, but I can see it aint going to do no good." He backed a few steps away from her.

Casey cried out. "Soda! Please don't be like that. Don't be mad at me. You are a great guy, but you are not the right guy for me."

Downtrodden, Sodapop questioned, "And Buck is?"

"No. He's just … well he's just there." Casey raised her chin a little to regain a bit of her pride. "And we haven't done what you are thinking we have done, and I wouldn't do that with him anyway! So quit worrying about me, I'll be fine and you're gonna be fine too." Soda bobbed his head slightly as if to agree with what she had said. Casey shoved her hands into the pockets of her Capri slacks and looked back to me. "Scout, can we please talk, just the two of us? Cause I have never had a friend as good as you, and I do not want to lose you over this."

I looked over to Sodapop who was walking towards me. His eyes struggling not to cry. I stared back towards her. "I don't think so, not tonight. I have a brother to take care of right now, and in my world, family means everything." With my stubborn mind-set I turned and followed my brother back into the house.

Casey cried out one last time before I shut the door. "Yeah? Well my sister means everything to me too." Seeing I wasn't coming back she turned and stormed off towards the alley, and into the darkness.

The porch door snapped shut, and Sodapop and I walked back into my room. I sat on my bed in a slump, and he walked over to lean against my dresser. "I wouldn't have cared if you talked to her." Soda clicked on the lamp. "Truth is, if that was Steve out there breaking up with you, I'd probably still talk to him."

"That's the difference between you and me Soda. Steve is your best friend, and even if I had found him the least bit attractive I still wouldn't have done anything about it, because he is _your_ best friend."

He got lost in thought a moment. "I guess I didn't think about it that way. Why didn't you say all this when we asked you if your would be mad if we got together?"

"Soda! I couldn't even walk to the bathroom by myself. I had other problems besides my brother and best friend being in love." Soda looked to his feet, crossed his arms across his bare chest and shook his head. I waited for the punch line to his thought, but the tears that started to fall from his new cries troubled me. Seeing his tears begin to intensify, I hustled to shut my bedroom door to keep our conversation from waking anyone. I looked back to my brother. "Soda, why are you crying?"

Soda bawled a little harder for a moment then wrestled a few words out. "It's not Casey."

I walked up to my brother and grabbed his chilly, naked forearms. "Honey. What do you mean, it's not Casey?"

Soda's eyes seemed filled with shame. "Evie came into the station today." Soda took a few more deep breaths. "She told us Sandy gave birth to her baby. She's coming back to town with the little guy."

"Soda, it's going to be okay." I said gently, just to comfort him.

"When she got here I wanted her to think I had gotten over her. I wanted her to see me with Casey and wish she hadn't ever did what she did." My brother tried to plug his tears with his forefinger and thumb, but they were relentless. "I aint over Sandy. I aint over her and now I got no one to prove her wrong with."

I hugged my brother and he fell into me. Quietly, he wept into the crook of my neck. "Soda, you know this whole day would have been a lot easier on everyone if you would have just been honest with everyone."

"I know that now." He sniffled a few times then looked to give me advice. "Hey? You oughta talk to Casey next time she comes around. You two are best friends and she loves you a lot more than she loves me."

"I reckon I better. Tonight just wasn't the right time." I sat back onto my bed. Casey's proud demeanor flashed in my mind. "You know she'd be more than happy to strut around on your arm just to make Sandy jealous."

"I know she would." Sodapop said with a half-hearted grin. He turned around and grabbed a few Kleenex from the box on my dresser. He blew his nose twice and then grew quiet. I looked up to my brother and found him staring at the top of my dresser as if he was reading something. The letter from Ashford Academy! I stretched out my arm and my hand lunged for the letter I didn't want my brother to see. Noticing my movement he was swift as he grabbed the wrinkled piece of paper with his far hand and kept it away from me.

"Soda, give that to me." I demanded.

Soda used his free forearm to fend me off as he struggled with the words on the page so that they made sense to him. I tried to circle around my brother to retrieve the letter. He blocked my attempts, then he comprehended what the letter was asking me to do. Sodapop's jaw dropped along with the arm that held the letter from my grasp. I snatched the letter from his hand and backed away from him, onto my bed.

He stared at me in disillusionment. "How long have you had that letter?"

"I just got it." I said, sadly.

"Have you told Darry about it?"

"Darry gave it to me."

"I don't understand? They aren't sending you away, are they?" My brother's lip began to quiver and his endless supply of tears began to fall again.

"Oh Soda." I whined in disapproval. "You weren't supposed to see that letter just yet."

"I don't want you to go!" Soda cried out and crawled onto my bed with me.

His crying was infectious and tears of frustration welled up in my eyes. "Soda, calm down. No one is sending me away. It's just an opportunity, that's all."

"An opportunity for what?" Clearly, Sodapop didn't read the letter well enough.

I scooted over towards the wall giving my brother plenty of room to lie down. He lay down next to me and crossed his arms onto his chest. I stared up at the ceiling and explained to him the opportunities of going to an academy could give me that Tulsa High School couldn't. After I explained everything Soda had ceased his tears and he looked over at me. "When do you have to leave?"

I sighed heavy. "I haven't even decided to go."

"Are you crazy? You have to go!"

"No I don't, and I might not." I barked out of shock that Soda was in support of me attending the Academy.

"Why wouldn't you? This is the kind of thing Mom used to pray would happen for one of us kids."

"I'll give you five reasons." I snapped. "Darry, Sodapop, Ponyboy, Casey and Owen!"

Soda stayed quiet a second then looked over to me. "Those are good reasons, but I'll give you one good reason why you should go."

"What's that? Scout?"

"Yeah."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven 

I climbed the steps in the school to my locker in Soc's row. My head was thumping with pain. I wasn't sure if it was because of everything I was thinking of or if it was my lack of sleep. I reached my floor and began looking for Owen. I wanted nothing more than to talk to him about everything that was on my mind.

"Scout!" Owen's voice called to me from thirty lockers away. He came to me, wearing his letterman jacket and holding a stack of books in his hands. Pete, Alex, and Bethany tagged behind him. "Pete just got done telling me you were hassled yesterday by some greaser kid."

His description of James caught my attention because it was the first time I could remember him ever referring to someone as a greaser. I stopped at my locker and pulled the door open. James being back in town bothered me, but his presence was the least of my worries. "I was, but I'm fine. Pete and Two-Bit were around to help me out." I smiled at Owen's friend. "Thanks, Pete."

"Anytime!" Pete smiled back. I liked him.

"Who was the kid?" Owen inquired, and his friends stayed close for any extra information they may hear.

"James," I told him without embellishing. I knew that Owen knew who James was, and what our history had been. "He's out of reformatory school and back in town."

"Do you think he's going to be a problem?" Owen asked.

"I doubt it." I said with a tired exhale. I didn't plan to waste a moment of my thoughts on a boy I didn't care for. I gathered the books for my classes in my hands, and Owen took them from me as I expected he would. I shut the metal locker door. "I tried to call you last night, but you were not at home."

"I took Olivia out for ice cream cause my parents were arguing. There were still yelling when we got back. I didn't want any part of it, so I put Olivia to bed then I went straight to bed too." Owen stacked his own schoolbooks on top of mine, bid goodbye to his friends, and gently placed his hand on the small of my back to lead me down the hallway to my classroom.

"Do you have to work after school?"

"No. I got all my work done yesterday." Owen grinned. "I was hoping you and I could go to Rusty's for a Coke after school, if you think Darry would let you."

"Darry won't care as long as I'm home for dinner and I get my homework done. Besides, I have got something important to talk to you about."

"Is it serious?" Owen's face showed concern as we stopped outside the door to my classroom.

"No," I lied a little. "It's just that I have a big decision to make, and I want your opinion as to what I should do."

The boy smiled. "Okay, it's a date then. I'll see you at lunch." Owen leaned down and kissed me quickly on the cheek before leaving for his own classroom.

I tried to concentrate during my morning classes, but my headache persisted. I looked forward to lunch. I was hungry. When the bell rang I rushed out of the classroom only to hustle down the hall and unexpectedly meet up with Two-Bit. It was no accident on his part. He knew right where I was going to be. He grabbed my arm, and pulled me towards the doorway that led to the parking lot. "Come on Sissy, let's go to lunch."

I scowled at Two-Bit as he pulled me along. "Not today, Two-Bit. I'm going to lunch in the cafeteria with Owen."

"Nope," Two-Bit commanded. "You're coming with us today. I found out some news you and the boys are going to want to hear."

My hunger pained, but my interest peaked. Two-Bit was only bossy when it was necessary. I decided to follow Two-Bit through the parking lot to Steve's car where Steve was waiting behind the wheel, and Ponyboy was sitting in the backseat. I climbed into the back with my brother. Two-Bit slid onto the passenger's seat.

Steve started the car and looked at me in his rearview mirror. "What are you coming along for?"

"I made her come along," Two-Bit answered for me, and turned his body to give consideration to all three of us. "We've got a bit of a problem that I wanted ya'll to know about." He had our attention as Steve drove the car out of the school parking lot. "That boy James that was bothering you yesterday. He aint runnin' with Shepard's gang anymore."

Steve, who only heard about my problem with James on the morning drive to school, groaned at the news. "Are you serious? Damn, that s the worst!"

Ponyboy sat forward in his seat, confused by the information. "I don't get it. Why does it matter whose gang he is hanging with?"

"Geez! Come on Pony!" Steve yelled wishing Ponyboy kept better tabs on the unwritten rules of the gangs in the neighborhood. "It means, if he aint running with Shepard's gang no more, then he don't have to follow the rule that he can't mess with Scout no more."

Ponyboy was as confused as he was concerned. "What?"

Two-Bit looked at Ponyboy, and jumped into the conversation. Two-Bit spoke with more care then Steve. "Remember a year ago when James wouldn't leave Scout alone?"

"Yes." Ponyboy answered.

"Remember the rumble with Shepard's gang?"

Ponyboy had only been in two rumbles in the last year, so he hadn't forgotten either of them. "Yes."

"The agreement was, if we beat Shepard's gang, James couldn't mess with Scout anymore. But he aint with Shepard's gang now, so the deal is off. He don't have to leave Sissy alone if he don't want to."

"Oh," Ponyboy said blankly and looked to me for my response.

Steve piped up. "Why isn't he with Shepard's gang anymore?"

Two-Bit turned forward in his seat. His voice grew low as if he didn't wan the kids in the back to hear. "Know that red headed girl, Rhonda, that Tim had been running with?"

"Yeah," Steve responded.

"Seems James decided to have his way with her, without her permission, if you know what I mean."

"What?" Steve asked less in question and more in shock to hear the news.

"That's what I heard from one of the Weston boys," Two-Bit answered. No one doubted the information. No one in the gang had more knowledge of the happenings in the neighborhood than Two-Bit did.

"If he isn't running with Tim Shepard, who's he running with now?" Ponyboy asked, and pulled a cigarette out of his pocket.

"Northside Boys." Two-Bit replied and lit his Zippo lighter for Pony's cigarette. No one spoke. We all knew the Northside Boys was one of the roughest gangs in the city. They didn't care much about brotherhood, honor, or rules. They were cruel, violent, and ruthless. There would be no 'fight for honor' in the vacant lot with the Northside Boys. They only fought for fun, for blood, and for death.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter Eight 

Owen and I slid into the same bench of a booth in the corner at Rusty's Diner. I hadn't told him anything about what Two-Bit had told me during lunch. As far as Owen knew, Two-Bit just needed some urgent help with some homework before his last class of the day. The waitress came to the table dressed in a light blue uniform. "What'll it be for you kids?"

Owen ordered for the two of us, like he always did. "We'll have two chocolate malts, two cheeseburgers and two French fries."

I looked up to the waitress. "Just one cheeseburger and fries." The lady nodded her head in understanding. My stomach was uneasy. I looked to my date. "I'm not really hungry. I just need to talk to you about a bunch of things."

"That's fine." He said, and grabbed my hand in his. "What did you want to talk about?"

I took in a deep breath trying to figure out where to start. "So much has happened in the last day that I don't even know where to start."

A voice called out from the front door and interrupted me before I could start. "Jasper!"

The two of us looked over to find a few guys from the football team walk in and wave. Owen waved to them in a way to let them know he was too busy to chat with them right now. The understood the sign and took a table far away from us.

Owen wrapped his arm around me, and looked me in the eyes. "I am all ears."

I sighed. "Well, for starters, Sodapop and Casey broke up yesterday."

"Whoa!" Owen was genuinely surprised the way the rest of us had been. "What happened?"

"Ponyboy and I walked over to the restaurant where she works yesterday and found her kissing another man. It wasn't pretty." I finished telling Owen about what we had seen, how Sodapop reacted, Casey coming to see me, and how I turned her away.

I picked at my chocolate malt with my spoon. "After I sent Casey away, Soda and I went back inside the house. That's when he told me he wasn't actually mad at Casey for not loving him. He was madder at her for leaving him when he needed her around the most. Seems he heard Sandy was coming back to town. Soda was hoping to have Casey on his arm to show Sandy he was over her."

"Sandy? She's the first girl who broke his heart. Right?"

"Yes. She cheated on Sodapop too, but she ended up pregnant by the other guy. Her family wasn't too happy, so they sent her to live with her grandmother in Florida. Evie said she gave birth to a baby boy, and she is coming back to the neighborhood with him. Sodapop didn't handle the news too well. He is still heartbroken over her."

"I suppose he would be." Owen gazed at me with empathy.

A voice broke into our conversation. "Hi there, you two!" We looked up to find Alex, Whitney, Pete, Bethany, and Charlotte coming towards our table. Owen knew he couldn't pass these friends off as easily as he could the guys from the football team. He looked at me and whispered a quick "sorry" to go with his apologetic look. His friends clambered into the booth with us.

"You all can't stay here long. Scout and I are on a private date," Owen said. His friends looked at each other and laughed taking his comment as a joke. It wasn't often that Owen and I went out without. When we did, one or more of his friends were sure to be tagging along.

"You two don't date? Do you?" Pete sarcastically teased and grabbed a French fry from

Owen's basket.

Alex added to the humor. "I think Owen's too busy working to date. How long has it been since you two have been on a real date, Scout?"

"Without all of you around?" I smiled to insinuate they were encroaching on the closet event to a date I had in awhile.

"Oooo!" Pete yelled out and laughed. "We get the picture; you two don't want us around."

Owen looked at his best friend. "That might be a good idea. We will catch up with ya'll this weekend."

His friends faked surprised reactions to insinuate they never saw Owen out on a weekend. Alex made a suggestion. "Come on gang. Let's go find ourselves a less crowded booth." Everyone in the group climbed back out of the booth and respected our privacy.

Only Charlotte stayed a second longer to bat her eyes at my boyfriend. "See you around, Owen." Then she moseyed out the booth, but she was sure to wiggle her hips as she walked away.

I saw her action and looked at Owen, who was only looking at me. "So you were saying?"

"I need to find Casey and make up with her. I am mad at her, but she's right and Sodapop is right. I can't just cast her aside because she hurt my brother. We are really the only family she has. Without us, she's got no one. And when you've got no one you end up like bitter and lonely, like Dallas Winston."

Owen softly ran his fingers up and down the side of my cheek. "I think you are right. You and I both know that there are no guarantees in life, so you should talk to her soon."

"I will." I put my head on his shoulder and wrapped my arms around his bicep. I didn't know how or why, but the two of us were perfect for each other. I gazed over at the steno notebook that I had brought in. Underneath the cardboard cover sat the real reason I needed to talk to Owen. I sat back up to gather the courage to begin the conversation about the academy, but a flying ball of paper soared across the restaurant and bopped Owen in the nose. The football team buddies shared a loud laugh. Without worry of getting in trouble for causing a ruckus Owen picked up the wadded wrapper and whipped it back. It landed in the Coke glass of one of the players. The antics started a playful competition between a few of the booths of kids. Paper wads and fries soared through the air. I laughed with the other girls and sought protection from projectiles behind Owen.

"Alright you kids!" One of the waitresses laughed. "Ya'll are gonna knock that off! I've got chow to deliver and your games are gonna get in my way. So ya'll just call it quits."

The boys booed and groaned, but they did as they were told. I looked at the littered restaurant and thought about the differences between Socs and Greasers. If this had happened over at the Dingo the waitresses would have kicked the lot of them out of the place, and maybe called the cops. Then Owen threw two dollars down on the table for a tip. Money. It made the difference. The waitresses at Rusty's didn't fret the mess because they would be rewarded for cleaning up after the boys. Greasers didn't leave great tips, and a handful of them rarely paid their bill. I didn't want to be a greaser. I wanted money. I needed the opportunity to go to college. Maybe I needed Ashford Academy, even though I didn't want it.

"Let's get out of here." Owen reached for my hand. I grabbed my steno notebook, grabbed his hand and followed him out of the restaurant into his Camero. "I figured we weren't gonna get anywhere in there, and I didn't want to be interrupted anymore." Owen smiled at me as his blond bangs dangled in front of his gorgeous blue eyes. He leaned across the car and kissed my lips once, twice and then we melted into one long kiss. I ran my fingers through his blond hair. He put his warm hand on my naked knee. My blood began to rush a little faster as his hand crept up my leg a few inches. Our warm kisses grew deeper into a French kiss. I ran my fingers down Owen's neck and caressed the well-defined muscles of his chest that were covered by his tight polo shirt. Owen took a risk and moved his hand a few more inches up the top of my soft, silky, naked thigh.

Knock! Knock! Knock! The sound startled us and Owen twisted around to look out his window. Just outside he found Pete and Alex laughing at us. Alex added in a female voice, "You kids stop that and go home!" The two boys got their giggles and turned away and walked across the parking lot.

Owen shook his head laughing and cranked the engine to a start. "Interrupted again. How about we go to your house and talk?"

"We can do that." I said and looked down at the notebook on my lap.

Owen put the car in reverse, backed out of the parking spot, and put the car into drive. We moved forward and I looked up to just in time to see a boy standing a few feet directly in front of the car. Out of surprise, I let out a small scream. Owen pressed hard on the brakes. The car tires chirped to a halt as the two of us lurched forward in our seats. 

"What the…?" Owen asked in shock.

I focused on the boy in his black jean jacket, gray t-shirt, and black jeans. A cigarette was clenched between his teeth as an evil smile graced his lips showing two perfectly placed dimples.

James leaned forward and placed his hands on the hood of Owen's Camaro. He looked through the glass at me. His wicked smile didn't fade. The hairs on the back of my neck began to rise. Owen opened his car door alarming me further. I yelled out in fear. "Owen! What are you doing? Get back in the car!"

Owen ignored my requests. He stepped out of his car and leaned forward with one arm on the roof of the car and one on the door. "Buddy! What are you doing?"

James stood tall and let the grin on his face melt into a tuff stare. He took one last, long drag of his cigarette. Methodically, he let the smoke creep out of his mouth like the devil himself.

"Owen!" I yelled again. "Just leave him alone and get in the car!"

"You want to know what I was doing?" James asked rhetorically. "I was watching you make out with my girl."

"You were watching us?" Owen asked as his posture straightened and muscles tensed. Behind us, Bethany and Charlotte ran across the parking lot into the diner while Pete and Alex stepped closer to the situation.

"I don't take to kindly to you taking advantage of my girl the way you were." To accent his displeasure, he flicked his still smoldering cigarette at his adversary.

Owen moved out of the way and walked around his open car door. "Here is your first and last warning. Leave my neighborhood and leave Scout alone."

James laughed at the threat and strolled a few steps towards the passenger's side of the car. He was directly across from Owen. "And if I don't?"

Owen's lip began to quiver with rage. "Pain. A lot of it, for a long time."

"I don't think I'm going to be the one in any pain." James said without worry. He looked at me through the windshield and his green eyes flickered with malevolence. "Get out of the car, Scout."

My mouth dropped open with indecision. I wished Owen would just get in the car and drive away, but that wasn't the point he wanted to make.

"Stay in the car." Owen issued the next order.

"Get out of the car!" James yelled this time and reached into the front pocket of his jeans.

"Stay in the car, Scout." Owen commanded again as he stood on guard trying to determine James' next move.

"How about this, Scout!" James leaned against the car and pulled an unopened switchblade out of his pocket for only me to see. "You get out of the car or your pretty boy Soc is going to die like they all should." Knowing James better than anyone wanted to, I knew the lack of respect he had for others. I popped the car door open and stood up with the heavy metal door between him and me. He grinned and leaned on the door. "That's my girl."

"Scout, get back in the car!" Owen yelled and his eyes showed alarm. The diner door opened and five large football players marched out in their dress slacks and letterman jackets. Alex and Pete walked up to the rear of the car ready to fight.

I eyed the hand with the long switch-blade concealed half inside his hand and half inside the sleeve of his jean jacket. "Why are you doing this?"

"Why am I doing this?" James questioned with mock disbelief. "Why are you doing this? You're my girl and I find you with him!" James walked around the car door and stood close to me.

"Leave her alone, Greaser!" One of Owen's football buddies yelled. James ignored his demand. He reached up with his left hand and grabbed the back of my neck. Owen made a quick move to rescue me. James raised his weapon hand, and I heard a familiar click as he released the nine-inch blade from its secrecy. Owen froze at the sight. I don't think he had ever been in a situation as volatile as this one.

In the distance, the faint sound of sirens could be heard coming to the scene. Knowing his time was short, James leaned forward and whispered in my ear. "I always take what I want." He straightened up, took one last look at me, and stepped away. He smiled at the crowd and announced. "Gotta run!" He retracted his knife and took off like a bat out of hell down the nearest street.

I noticed a few of the boys start to take chase and I screamed. "Let him go! Just leave him alone and let him go." The boys ceased their chase for their own good.

Owen's friends rushed to the side of the car to see if I was harmed. Like an imbecile I began to cry. Owen circled around the car and wrapped me in his arms. Out of frustration, I scolded him. "I told you to stay in the car! I told you to just leave him alone and stay in the car! You don't know what a greaser like him will do! You are a Soc! You live in your pretty little protected world where everything is perfect and nothing ever goes wrong! You don't know what I know and you don't see what I've seen!"

Awe shot through Owen's body and his loving arms fell away. He took a step back from me and blended into the group of Soc's who had stood by to protect me just a few moments earlier. Regrettably, my comment had segregated me from them. In naming them socials, I claimed to be a greaser.

The squad cars pulled into the parking lot. The officers jumped out of their cars and moved in on the pack of youth. Demanding to know what the disruption to the public was the six officers separated the group. One of the waitresses came out from inside the diner rambling about what she had seen from the window.

"Officer, that dirty boy, who took off running, grabbed that little sweetheart by the neck and threatened her with the longest knife I have ever seen!"

A young officer dressed in brown turned to me. "Is this true?"

In my mind I answered. _No Sir, I'm not a little sweetheart_. Outside, I wiped the tears from my eyes and silently answered, yes. The officer took me by the arm and walked me to his squad car. His grip on my arm was tight, and for a moment I thought I was in trouble. He opened the rear door of his squad car. "Don't you worry sweetheart. We'll get this all taken care of. Just sit here a few minutes and calm down. I'm going to have a word with my supervisor, then we'll have you tell us all about what happened." He gave my shoulder a little push downward so I would sit. I sat down on the brown vinyl seat, hid my face in my hands and bawled some more.

I thought about my horrible words and how wrong I had been to blurt out such generalizations about Owen and his friends. The comments were rude and hurtful, especially towards Owen. His life was far from perfect. He'd seen what I'd seen. He'd had to feel what I'd felt. I thought of James. If the cops go looking for him, he is only going to grow more enraged, so enraged that he may follow through with his demented thoughts to actually kill someone. Maybe that someone would be me, or worse – Owen. I couldn't have that happen. I had to protect him.

I wiped my eyes and inhaled through my nose the best I could to steady my feelings. I had made a mess of things and it was up to me to fix it. I stood up and walked towards the officers who were questioning the waitress and the boys. "Officer?" I said once but my throat wasn't clear. I readied myself and called out again. "Officer?" The young man looked towards me. "Officer, I won't be pressing charges. If there are any charges you expect me to press I won't and I want to apologize to the boys." I looked at Owen and his friends. "I was wrong to say what I said. I didn't mean those words. I'm… I'm sorry." My lip quivered uncontrollably and I turned and walked away from the scene.

"Scout?" Owen called out, but the officers didn't allow him to follow me.

"Miss? Miss?" The officer called to me, but I ignored the question and kept walking. He ran up behind me and begged me to rethink my decision. I told him I couldn't. I explained to him that all too often the law wasn't ever there to protect people like me when it mattered most. If I ratted out James, he wouldn't forget. I wasn't ready to take that chance. All I wanted was to get far away from my poor choices. I turned towards the officer. "I just want to go home?"

"I can take you home, but I'm going to be talking to your parents about all of this. Maybe they'll talk some sense into you." The officer seemed agitated when he walked me around to the passenger's side of the car. I climbed in. The supervising officer came over to chat with the younger one. After a short discussion, the young officer climbed into his car and smiled. "Why don't we get you on home to your mom and dad?"

I smiled politely but stayed quiet about the truth.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine 

I stepped out of the officer's patrol car and headed up the walkway to my house. Inside my head, I was angry at myself for the words I said to the boys outside the diner. I was also frustrated with myself for the situation I created by dating James in the first place. I wanted to be alone, but the officer exited his car and followed me. I turned to him. "It's okay, Sir. I'll be fine now that I am home."

"No, Miss, it's department procedure that I meet with your parents before I go."

I stopped on the second step of my porch and turned to face him. "You can't," I said blankly. "They're dead."

The officer seemed stunned by the news. "Oh… my apologies...I'm sorry to hear that."

"Don't worry. I'll be fine." I waved the Officer away hoping he would leave. I turned to continue up the stairs.

The officer called for my attention, "You do live with an adult, don't you?"

I snickered at the possibility that he considered I might be entirely alone. Then a thought of Casey passed through my mind, and the question no longer seemed absurd. "No Sir. My older brother cares for me, but he works two jobs to support us. Most nights I don't know when he'll be home and when he won't."

"Is anyone here?" The officer strained his neck to look through the living room windows.

I looked up at my house, but I didn't see any signs of life. If anyone inside had seen me come home in a squad car, they would have made their presence known long before now. I answered the officer's question. "I don't think so, but I'll be alright."

The man sighed heavily, no doubt over some type of protocol he was about to follow. "So you say you were in an argument, the boy pulled a knife, but you don't want to press charges. All this said, and you think it is going to be okay for you to go into an empty house and be alone 'til your brother comes home at a time you can't tell me?" His summary of the situation made me think about the state of affairs from someone else's viewpoint. I had just assumed, as often is the case, the officer couldn't - or wouldn't - do anything for me. That was usually common practice in this neighborhood. It appeared this officer hadn't worked much on my side of town. "No, I can't just leave you here by yourself."

"Listen, I'll be fine. I've stayed by myself plenty of times. I'll just go inside and lock the doors."

"I can't leave you here with out anyone here. I'm going to have to take you down to the station. We'll leave notice for your brother to come there and get you." The officer said and waited for me to move in his direction.

"I have other brothers. What if one of them is home? They will stay with me. I'll go see if anyone is inside." Before I could get to the front door, a familiar engine revved up and came down the street from the direction of Johnny's house. I watched the metallic blue paint glisten in the late afternoon sunlight. Owen pulled his car to a stop. Half of me wanted to run inside and hide and half of me was glad he was here. He climbed out of the car with my school books cradled in his arm. The missing books had been the farthest thing from my mind, as well as the steno notebook holding the letter to my future. Darry would not be happy if I lost that letter.

"Afternoon, Officer." Owen greeted the man, "I'm a friend of Scout Curtis'. I was at Rusty's Diner awhile ago. If you don't mind, I'd like to speak with her."

The officer was agitated by the interruption. He put his hands onto his hips. "It will have to wait. We were just leaving."

"Wait, I don't think anyone is home right now, but Owen can stay here with me. It won't be too much longer till Sodapop comes home from work." Apprehensively, I looked at Owen and hoped he was willing to stay.

The officer's disbelief of my brother's name made the features of his face squish together. Owen didn't wait for the man's verbal response. "Sir, if its okay I would be willing to stay and look after her. I am a good friend of hers and her family."

The man's face was still squished together when he peered up at me. "I suppose that would be fine."

I looked at Owen. "I'll be fine with him."

"Alright, but try to talk some sense into her about filing charges against that kid. We can't do our job right if she isn't willing to help us out," the officer said with discouragement. He began to walk back to his squad car and then he turned back to me. "Sodapop is your brother's nickname, right?"

I folded my arms across my chest. "His real name is Sodapop and if you don't believe me you can meet him when he gets home."

The man's face was still wrinkled in disbelief. "No, I'll believe you. I don't think my chief is going to believe me when I write my report, but I believe you." The officer tipped his hat and headed back to his squad car.

My arms stayed folded across my chest as Owen came through the chain link gate. Unexpectedly, he threw his free arm around me and squeezed my shoulder as he spoke. "Are you okay? Everyone at the diner was really worried about you." Owen backed up a step to look into my blue eyes.

"Worried, what for?"

Now it was Owen's turn to squish up the features on his face in disbelief. "What do you mean, what for? Because that hooligan stopped by to threaten us, he grabbed you with a knife in his hand, and you wouldn't tell the cops about any of it. Then you left." Owen's face reflected the slight pain in his heart. "Scout, why didn't you wait for me to bring you home?"

Considering my words to him and his friends, I felt puzzled by Owen's reaction. "But I yelled at all of you. I thought you would be mad?"

Owen chuckled a little at how naïve I was being. "No Scout. I'm not mad. No one is mad."

Guilt flooded my thoughts. "But I yelled those nasty things at everyone. I embarrassed you and myself."

"No one cared that you yelled. We weren't worried about what you said. For most of the guys there, it was true. I've told you this a dozen times, I don't keep 'those kind' of friends. Alright?" I nodded my head in agreement to show I was listening. I couldn't speak because if I did it would have opened up a floodgate of frustrated tears. Owen kissed my forehead and gave me a nudge towards the house. "You've had a long day. Let's go inside and talk."

I walked with him up the steps and into the house. We sat together on the couch, and he put my schoolbooks on the coffee table. As he pulled off his letterman's jacket I reached for the steno notebook. I gave it a hard shake, but nothing fell out. I began to panic and fumble through the pages of the other schoolbooks. Owen reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out the tattered and folded letter. "Is this what you are looking for?"

Wide eyed, I looked at the letter and wondered if he had read it. Then I figured he had, or it wouldn't have been in his pocket. I gently took the letter and asked to be sure. "You read it?"

"Yes." Owen smiled proudly and his eyes twinkled. "Is it what you wanted to talk to me about back at Rusty's?"

My frown was in contrast to his smile. "I just got it. I haven't decided if I am going to go."

"Why wouldn't you go? Ashford Academy is one of the premier schools for girls in the state. Only the most elite girls in the state are invited to attend. You'd be perfect there."

"What?" I questioned, not really expecting a positive response from him. "How do you know about Ashford Academy?"

"Ashford is the premier girl school where most of the top debutantes of Oklahoma go." Owen raised his eyebrows and proved to me what a great offer this was. "Charlotte has been trying to get into school there for the last three years, but they won't accept her. Scout, this invitation is like grabbing the golden ring on the carousel!"

Quietly, I unfolded the letter and looked at it, then to Owen. "But it's so far away."

Owen's smile drifted away slightly. "It's the chance of a lifetime, and it's your dream to go to college. Going to the academy will make that dream come true for you."

"What about us?"

"We'll still be us." Owen cocked his head to the side a little. "Scout, when a college calls me next year and asks me to play football for them, I'm going to go."

The harsh realization of the truth hit me hard. Even if I stay at home Owen was bound to leave after is senior year. "So, you think I should go?"

"Yes, I want you to go. I don't want to see you miss out on your dream." Owen reached up and rubbed my right ear with his soft fingers. "I don't want you to go, but you have to. You need to do it for yourself and for your family."

Owen was right. At the very least I needed to do it for Darry. He gave up too much and worked too hard for me to refuse the opportunity. I nuzzled my head into Owen's chest and he kissed the top of my head. I looked up, into his ocean blue eyes. "I love you. If I do go, I don't want you to forget that." Then I kissed his warm lips.

Owen wrapped his arms around me and returned my kiss with a more passionate one that lasted for minutes. Slowly, I lay backwards on to the sofa. Locked in a kiss, Owen followed me. He reached down and pulled my knee up. Gravity helped to pull my skirt down, exposing my skin. Owen placed his hand on my bare knee, then methodically moved his hand down the back of my thigh. His action stopped just an inch short of my undergarment. My body lusted for him to go further. I couldn't explain why, but I felt all of my inhabitations give way and I would have been more than willing to let his hand wander anywhere beneath my clothes.

Intrusively, the sound of our truck pulling to a stop outside drew my attention away from my love. The need for flight replaced earlier feelings of lust. I pushed Owen off of my body and peeked out the living room window. Sodapop and Ponyboy clambered out of the truck and trotted up the front steps. I gasped, smoothed out my hair, and put a schoolbook on my lap. I hoped my brothers wouldn't notice my flush face when they walked in and suspect me of unladylike behavior. Owen followed my lead and grabbed a school book from the coffee table as my Pony and Soda walked into the house.

"Hey guys? How's it going?" I causally asked.

Sodapop kicked off his shoes, sniffed the air, and headed to the kitchen with no notice of me. "Sissy? Why didn't you start anything for dinner? I'm starving." He disappeared through the kitchen door without needing a response.

My other brother tossed his schoolbooks onto the coffee table and walked over to pull the power button on the television set. He came back to the couch and flopped down next to Owen and me. "Did you two just get home?" Owen popped up off the couch without a word to Pony or me, and followed Sodapop into the kitchen.

"We've only been home a few minutes." I looked at Ponyboy. "The afternoon didn't go too well."

---

Owen walked into the kitchen and stood quiet a few seconds as he watched Sodapop grab the bottle of milk from the refrigerator. Their eyes met when Soda stood up and turned around. They could see each other had something troubling on their minds. Owen took the lead in the conversation when he leaned on the edge of the stovetop. "You remember that boy Scout dated a year ago, James?"

The name grabbed Soda's attention and he ceased gathering the ingredients for his chocolate milk. "Uh huh."

"He showed up at Rusty's Diner today when Scout and I were there…"

---

Ponyboy turned towards me to ignore the television show on the screen. "What do you mean he was watching you?"

I grimaced. "He told us he'd been watching us." I hesitated in telling Pony what I had been doing, "kissing inside Owen's car."

Ponyboy's face crinkled up in disgust at the image in his head. "How'd he get all the way over to that side of town?"

"I don't know, but it was scary because he was really mad…"

---

Owen spoke in a low voice so no one but Sodapop could hear him describing the scene, "He jumped right in front of my car and pounded on the hood. I jumped out and told him to get lost. But he wasn't scared. Not even when the other guys from the football team came outside."

"What did he want?" Soda asked quietly.

"He told me to keep my hands off _his_ girl. The he yelled at Scout to get out of the car. I told her to sit tight, but you know her. She didn't listen. I guess she figured she could handle him on her own…"

---

I could tell from the look on his face Ponyboy was concerned for me. I hesitated to tell him the next part, but I knew he needed to hear about it. "I didn't want to get out of the car, but he had a blade hidden in the sleeve of his jacket. He said he was going to use it on Owen if I didn't get out of the car."

"Why didn't you two just get out of there?"

"I don't know, Pony. Owen wouldn't get back in the car. I guess he was just trying to be tough and protect me, but he didn't know James had the blade. And I didn't want him to find out the hard way, if you know what I mean."

Ponyboy nodded his head. "I sure don't like all this, knowin' he's running with the Northside Boys..."

---

Sodapop kept quiet about the gang that Ponyboy said James was running with these days. He figured Owen wouldn't know anything about their reputation. "So, James walked right up to her?"

"Yeah," Owen swallowed hard. "The boys and I moved in to get him, but he grabbed her and pulled out a knife. To be honest with you, I haven't ever gotten into a fight with anyone with a knife before."

"Did he hurt her?" Sodapop's eyes grew wide and he stood up tall like he was ready to run and check on me if he needed to.

"No, he didn't have a chance to." Owen shook his head. "He heard the sirens in the distance and he took off running…"

---

A chill ran up my spine as I recalled the incident. I rubbed my arms and looked Ponyboy in the eye. "He said he'd be back for me. Then he smiled like the devil himself. The whole thing made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up."

"I'll bet." Ponyboy's eyes widened with urgency. "That boy ain't going to be nothing but trouble 'til someone does something about this…"

---

Owen shrugged his shoulders. "Then she told the officer she wasn't going to press charges. Before I could talk to her the police officer was taking her home. I finished telling the officers everything I knew then I raced over her to be sure she was okay."

Sodapop patted Owen on his shoulder to let him know he had done all he could. "Why don't you head home for dinner? I'll talk to Darry and the boys and we'll figure something out about James."

Owen agreed and walked back out to the living room with Sodapop on his heels. Owen wiped his sweaty palms on his khaki pants and flashed his charming smile my way to hide what he and Sodapop had been doing. "I better head on home for dinner."

I noticed the nervousness on both his and Sodapop's face. I smiled at them, hoping to calm their nerves. "Ya'll are worrying about nothing. I'll be fine!" I stood up and handed Owen his letterman's jacket from the couch. Hand in hand, we walked out together to the front porch. Dusk had set in. Our privacy was nil, as Soda and Pony followed us out to keep an eye on our safety. Owen and I shared a glance and giggled. He leaned down and gave me a well-mannered kiss on my cheek. He let go of my hand and looked me in the eye. "I'll see you at school tomorrow"

"I'll be there." I backed up a few steps and landed by Ponyboy's side.

Owen trotted down the porch steps, climbed into his car, and drove away with no sign of James.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten 

Darry grabbed the last basket of laundry and walked into the living room where I was waiting on the couch for him to be ready to go. I could tell by his tense posture he was more worried about the discussion over dinner concerning James' behavior **than** he let on. He piled a second basket of laundry onto his other loaded basket and paused by the front door for me. "Let's go, Sissy." He commanded as if it were him waiting on me.

Obediently, I grabbed one more basket of laundry and followed him out to the black sedan. We put the laundry into the trunk and climbed into the car. We traveled the first few blocks in silence then I looked over at Darry. A tiny grin tried to escape from his lips, but he worked hard to keep it to himself. The expression was in contrast to the way he presented himself over the past few hours. I couldn't help but grin myself and ask,. "Why the smile?"

Darry let the smile stay on his face. "I called Kathryn today over my lunch hour."

"You did? What did she say?"

Darry laughed a little. "Nothing, she wasn't home. But! I called her and followed through with my end of the bargain. Now you need to do yours and give some real hard thought to going to Ashford Academy."

I sighed and looked out the window. "I **will and I am**. I just need a little more time."

Darry accepted my answer. Because he didn't push the issue, I elaborated and told him what Owen had said about the school and the opportunities it could afford me. I told him that Sodapop thought it was a good idea and Ponyboy was on the fence about whether or not I should go. With all that support, it should seem easy to make the decision to go, but I still had hesitation. Darry understood.

A few hours later, I looked up from the book that I was reading to watch the last lady leave the Laundry mat with her clothes clean and folded. Night had fallen, and outside it was cool and dark. Inside, the lights were bright and the air was warm from the clothing dryers that had been running most of the day. I studied how the every glass window and glass door was covered in a dense fog from the floor to the ceiling. I liked the seclusion of the laundry mat, and now it was just Darry and I inside. I looked over at my brother who was leaning against a large folding table watching the clothes in the dryer turn over and over and over.

The sight was humorous. I giggled, "What are you doing, Darry?"

He smiled back. "Just taking sometime to myself. Lost in my thoughts."

"I'd give you a penny for your thoughts, but I'm broke."

Darry looked over at me with a wide grin. "That's exactly why you need to say yes to Ashford Academy."

His point made me think. It would be nice to someday afford a house in a nice neighborhood with a washing machine and dryer to do my laundry. I looked back to the words in my book and spoke. "I told you I would think about it."

"Think harder!" He said amusingly.

I ignored him then the strand of jingle bells that were tied to the Laundry mat doors chimed to signal someone coming inside. I looked up to see who our company would be for the next hour as our clothes finished drying and we folded everything. I nearly screamed, "Kathryn!"

The beautiful young lady walked into the Laundry mat with a gracious smile on her face. She weaved through the rows of washing machines and joined me in a hug. "Scout, you have grown prettier and prettier. It is so nice to see you again."

I was so excited I could barely think. "I am so glad to see you too!" I looked to Darry hoping Kathryn's gaze would follow mine. Her attention was headed there with out my assistance.

"Darry, Sodapop told me you would be here. I hope you don't mind my stopping by unannounced." She walked towards my brother who seemed uncomfortable in his skin with her around. I was sure he was nervous.

"No, not at all." He rambled, "I am glad you came by. I called you today. I was hoping we could talk about a few things."

Kathryn eyed the bright lights of the Laundry mat then peeked over her shoulder at me. She looked back to Darry and made a suggestion. "Why don't we go and talk in my car for privacy?"

"Sure." Darry agreed and assigned me a chore. "Scout, keep an eye on things, and start folding the clothes when the first dryer is done."

"I will, Darry." I said and offered up a facial expression of excitement. "You two take all the time you need. I've got everything here under control." The two of them walked outside and the bells chimed again. Knowing they may need a little assistance to tell each other how they truly felt, I offered up a prayer to my mom and dad. I wanted Darry's life to make a change for the better and in my opinion, Kathryn was just the right thing for him.

I poked my nose back into my book and lost track of time till the door bells chimed again. This time the sound came from the door on the far side of the laundry mat, so I knew Darry and Kathryn were still sitting in her car and chatting. I looked towards the door they left, but I couldn't see them through the condensation on the windowpanes. I closed my eyes for a moment and hoped they were doing more than talking. Perhaps a kiss or two would be in their plans. I smiled at the thought and turned my head to see the patron who had entered the building from the far door.

Those familiar green eyes and dimples shocked every last nerve in my body. I jumped off the folding table where I had been sitting and let my book fall closed. His arrival wasn't a coincidence. I noticed he had come into the laundry mat, empty handed. "James!"

"Hello, Baby. Did you miss me?" He hissed in a sarcastic tone. "'Cause I missed you."

I didn't answer. My eyes scanned the inside of the laundry mat. Every window was completely clouded over so no one could see in and no one could see out. I was trapped in the back of the room with rows of folding tables and washing machines blocking my escape. I was stunned and didn't move.

James slithered his way through the remaining washing machines that separated us. He paused on the other side of the large heavy folding table I had been sitting on. "I can't believe you would do this to me. I told you that I loved you. I gave you a ring to prove it."

"I never said anything about the stolen ring." I quickly defended myself hoping he wasn't mad because he thought I had ratted him out to the cops, and helped to send him off to the reformatory school.

His words came out of his mouth devious tone. "I know you didn't. Why would you? That was back when you actually cared about me. Not anymore though. Now all you care about is cruising around with your rich boyfriend in his expensive car thinking your better than everyone else."

I shook my head and could barely speak as fear tightened my throat. "I don't think that."

"It doesn't matter what you say. I'm not here for you. I'm here for me."

I backed up a step and kept my eyes locked with his. I tried to determine what his next move would be. "What do you mean?"

"I told you. I always get what I want, and I want you." His devilish grin graced his face.

My sight danced around the inside of the secluded business. My ears heard only the rumble of the dryers. I looked once more at James eyes hoping his words were all a bluff.

"Make your move." James amused himself by tempting me to play his game. Then he reached behind himself into his back pocket.

Switchblade! I screamed inside my head. I had no choice but to run. Buzzzzzzz! The loud sound of the one of the dryers coming to a stop drew his attention away from me for a second. I seized the opportunity and bolted to the right to head out the door that Darry had left through. James used his strong arms to push himself up and over the folding table in one quick motion. He scampered across the table top, jumped from the table, and tackled my body to the floor. I let out a terrified scream. "No! Darry! Darry!" My voice trembled as I screamed for help.

I tried to wiggle loose, but James pinned my thin body to the floor. He cupped his left hand over my mouth to silence my screams. With his right hand he opened his switchblade. "Not another word from you or I'll shut you up for good," James threatened and pressed the cold steel blade against the side of my neck. I swallowed hard and felt helpless as he took his hand off of my mouth and ripped open my blouse. A few of the buttons flew across the room. James ran his hand down my body, over my breasts, across my naval and down my leg. His hand stopped at my knee and retreated back up my leg and under my skirt. I wiggled my hips and knees hoping to stall his actions.

"Hold still." James hissed and pressed the flat part of his blade harder against my neck.

Tears streamed down my face. I tried to wiggle less, but my survival instincts wouldn't let me hold completely still. James reached all the way up my skirt, grabbed my undergarment and pulled hard. My panties slid down to my knees where I was able to trap them and further complicated my attacker's plan. "Damn it, you little witch!" He screamed and pulled the knife away from my neck so he could get a better grip on my panties. Seizing the moment , I began to flail my fists and legs in desperation. "Damn it!" James screamed in frustration. "Hold still!" I managed to get one hard strike against his jaw.

Needing his other hand to control me, James put the knife on the floor beside him. He pulled my panties off of my legs and climbed on top of me again. I struggled harder and hit the blade of the knife with my knee sending it across the floor and out of his reach. Angered, he pulled back his fist and punched me in the cheek. The pain was excruciating, but I knew my chances to end my horror were growing slim. I screamed as loud as my lungs would let me, "Darry! Darry help!"

"Shut up!" James yelled.

I was able to scream for my brother one more time before James wrapped his strong hands around my neck and began to squeeze. I tried to inhale, but no air entered my lungs. My eyes met looked directly into James' cold, deadly stare. My final burst of panic filed my body. I grabbed at his wrists and tried to lift his hands from my neck. The jingling of bells could be heard in the distance.

"Scout!" Darry demanded my attention, but I couldn't give it to him.

"Scout?" Kathryn's sweet voice called out for me in question.

I used the last of my strength to kick my feet against the floor. I could only hope one of them would hear my signal over the rumble of the dryers. I looked up at James and notice him glance over his shoulder. Relief entered my thoughts. Superman is coming!

My assailant released his grip from my throat. Nearly, out of energy, I rolled to my side to gasp for a welcome breath. My cloudy eyes looked ahead and noticed James scrambling for an item on the floor. I rolled over to my back and saw James charge towards my brother. Darry reached for the boy, then set him free without confrontation. I blinked to clear my sight and watched James leap across another folding table, and scurry out the door. The bells chimed one more time to signal my safety. I looked to Darry in relief.

There before me, my pillar of strength stood with a pale, desperate look on his face. His hands pressed against his abdomen and framed an item that protruded from his gut. The switchblade! He had been stabbed! I wiped more tears from my eyes and focused enough to see the blood begin to drip from the wound as Darry stood before me in shock.

I screamed in sheer terror, "Darry! NO!"

Darry fell forward to his knees and wheezed, "Sissy." Then he crumpled to the floor in pain.

Kathryn came up behind my brother. She screamed and covered her face with her hands after witnessing the horror.

"Darry?" I franticly called out to him. He was unable to answer. I crawled to him to assess the situation. My brother lay on his side in paralyzed pain. I cradled his head in my lap. The sweaty skin on his cheeks felt clammy as he trembled in my arms. "No…no...no!" The strongest man I ever knew lay before me, helpless in a filling pool of blood, and it was all my fault. Tears streamed down my face as I tried to clear my thoughts and figure out what to do next. Kathryn came to Darry's side and knelt down next to us. Her body trembled. Before she could speak I looked up at her and demanded, "You need to call an ambulance! Please, you need to help him. We can't let him die!"

Kathryn looked at me, her eyes full of tears. She cried out, "I don't know where to go. Tell me where can I find a phone?"

I looked at her in frustration. It wasn't until that moment that I realized Kathryn couldn't possibly know that the laundry mat didn't have a pay phone. I shut my eyes and thought hard for a solution. Then I remembered where I was in my neighborhood. "Two-Bit!" I cried, "You have to go and get Two-Bit to help us. He works across the street at the grocery store. They have a phone there." I sobbed, "Please hurry! Hurry!"

Kathryn jumped to her feet and ran out the door.

I looked down at Darry, his eyes had fallen shut and his body had grown limp. I bowed my head and rested my forehead against his. I cried and pleaded with him. "Darry, you have to be strong, you can't leave me. I need you. We all need you. Please, please don't leave us here alone. Please, Darry." Then I squeezed him as tight at I could, crying so hard that my head pounded in pain.

The bells on the door rang again. Alone on the cold floor a panicked thought came to my mind. What if it was James? What if he was coming back to fulfill his promises? I looked around for any sort of weapon that wasn't lodged in my brother's abdomen.

"Sissy?" Two-Bit rounded the row of washing machines and slid to his knees beside Darry and me. A sour look swept across his face, then he barked out a question. "Who did this? Sissy, who stabbed him?"

I sobbed, "James."

Two-Bit looked up at me and noticed my torn blouse hanging loose from my body. Red bruises were beginning to appear on my face and neck. Two-Bit's wide eyes were already bloodshot from tears when he looked back into my eyes. "Sissy, did he? Were you?" He couldn't seem to find a way to ask if James had forced himself on me.

I sobbed harder and babbled. "Two-Bit, this is all my fault. My brother is going to die, and it's all my fault."

"Don't say that." Two-Bit cried hard and yelled at me. "He is not going to die, Sissy! He's not going to die. I won't let that happen to us again!" The sirens approached and Two-Bit left my side to meet the officers and paramedics at the door.

The first set of officers rushed into the building to assess the situation. A tall, dark haired officer knelt beside Darry and felt for a pulse. "He grabbed his radio, Car 59, we have 145 needing immediate attention." The man looked at me. "Possible 155 on premises, we will need a second ambulance."

Upon hearing the call for a second ambulance I realized my blouse was still wide open allowing everyone to see my brassiere. I looked at the officer, pulled my shirt shut with one hand, and cried. "Sir, he is my brother. You can't let him die. Please don't let him die."

The officer reached over and put a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Sweetheart, do you know who did this?"

I tried to control my sobs. I knew that my poor choices had lead to this horrific scene. Chaos began to fill the room and I rambled in fear, "I did this. I caused this all to happen. It's my fault he is hurt. I should have let them give me up for adoption, I should have never dated until I was older, I should have told the police officer his name. I should have just made it easier on everyone and did what he told me."

The officer grabbed me by the arm and gently pulled me up to my feet so we could get out of the way of the paramedics who had arrived to take care of Darry. "Just calm down. I need you to stay calm and help me to figure out what happened here.

The officer looked at me with his dark brown eyes. "Tell me who stabbed that man."

I looked back at him, and my voice trembled out the answer that I should have **given** hours ago. "James Young."

The scenery began to swirl in my head, and the next hours had a chaotic familiarity to them. A warm blanket given to me to hide the damage. Answering the redundant questions delivered from different officers and paramedics. Nurses and doctors dressed in white. The smell of ammonia from the emergency room floor. Hearing bits and pieces of conversations, knowing they were about me, and wishing they weren't. Explaining that my mom wouldn't be coming soon to hold my hand. Waiting to see my brothers, wondering if they knew every aspect of the horror I had been through. Seeing their distraught faces as they held me in their arms again. Wishing I had made better choices.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven 

I opened my eyes and made a wish that the horrible night had all been just a dream. Slowly, I sat up and the strained and bruised muscles in my neck began to throb. There was no denying that every moment had been real. Distraught, I looked around the bedroom. I was in Darry's room where he should have been sleeping, but instead, Sodapop was sleeping to my right and Ponyboy was asleep to my left.

I hung my head and recollections of the night rushed back to me. The police had questioned all of us into the early morning hours. At the hospital, the doctors wouldn't let my brothers and I see Darry. They also wouldn't let us stay past in the hospital past visiting hours because we were minors. We had to leave Darry in the intensive care unit, but he wasn't alone. Kathryn agreed to stay at the hospital through the night. My brothers and I were apprehensive to leave our brother and go home. We worried that Darry wouldn't live through the night, and worse, that James might be waiting at our home to finish what he'd started. Two-Bit and Steve vowed they wouldn't let anything happen to any one of us. At home, they searched every room and closet in the house. Then Sodapop locked every door and window before we struggled to get some sleep. For our protection, Two-Bit slept in front of the back door on the hardwood floor in the hallway, his newest switchblade knife at the ready. Steve slept by the front door on the couch. Like a soldier, he left his shoes on so he would be ready in case of trouble.

I rubbed my forehead and the recollection faded. My fingers fell to my cheek and felt the swollen tissue. I decided to climb out of bed to get some ice to cool my throbbing pains. It was early, and we hadn't been asleep long, so I wanted to be sure not to wake my brothers. Carefully, I pulled my legs out from under the covers. I shimmied down between the two of them to the bottom of the bed, and I walked over to my mother's dresser. There, in the mirror, I stared at the black and blue bruise on my right cheek. Then I looked to my neck where the bruises left a lasting impression of exactly where James had placed his hands to quiet my screaming.

Disgusted with my appearance, I looked at the clock. It was just before eight in the morning and visiting hours wouldn't start for another hour. Quietly, I tip toed to the door and carefully turned the handle so it wouldn't make a sound. I knew Sodapop had lain down with a blade under his pillow incase he would need it to defend his siblings, and I didn't want him to hear the door open and think it was someone coming in and not someone going out. I pulled the door open, stepped out of the room, and nearly ran right into Two-Bit. His face looked weary as he whispered, "Are you okay?"

I frowned and nodded my head. "I was going to get some ice for my face." Two-Bit looked at the wound, sighed then escorted me into the kitchen. I grabbed a dingy kitchen towel, and Two-Bit put a handful of ice cubes into the middle of it. Looking down at the frozen water I sniffled twice and nearly cried when I asked, "Two-Bit, do… do you think Darry is dead?"

Two-Bit spoke in a voice more confident then I felt. "No, Scout."

"If something horrible had happened, Kathryn would have called, right?" I questioned.

"She would have let us know," Two-Bit assured me and folded the towel around the ice cubes for me.

"I'm really worried. I just got this bad feeling that things are fixin to get a whole lot worse." I put the ice to my cheek and flinched at the initial pain.

Two-Bit crossed his arms across his chest and leaned back against the counter and frowned. "That aint good." He shook his head. "Anytime you or Ponyboy get one of those 'feelings,' it aint ever good."

From the dining room doorway Steve peaked in on the two of us. "Is everything all right?"

"As good as they could be," Two-Bit told him.

Steve studied my face and frowned. In shame, I looked down to the floor. I knew it looked as bad as it felt. On the other side of the kitchen, Sodapop and Ponyboy emerged from the bedroom. Sodapop, still dressed from the night before, came straight towards me. His eyes fully of worry like Darry's had been a year ago when he suddenly, became 'man of the house'. "Baby girl, how are you feeling?"

"I'm okay." I said and turned my head away, so Sodapop couldn't see that I was lying.

"Want me to get you some aspirin?" Ponyboy asked from the doorway.

"Sure, that might do me some good."

Ponyboy headed to the bathroom. Sodapop grabbed a glass and filled it with water. Two-Bit, Steve and I headed out to the living room. I stopped at the dining room table to get the aspirin from my brother. He presented me with a handful of white pills. "Pony, I don't need that many. Two will be enough." My brother shrugged off my diagnosis and put the other four aspirins back in the bottle. Sodapop met up with us and handed me the glass of water.

Over by the sofa, Steve looked out the living room window. "What the…?" He questioned and leaned closer to the windowpane to better examine what was going on outside. "Soda, ya better check this out!"

Soda jogged over to the window. "What are they doing here?" Sodapop looked at Steve. "This can't be good, can it?"

Hearing the worrisome comment, Two-Bit, Ponyboy and I surrounded the two of them and stared out the window. Outside, two squad cars were parked on the street. We all leaned closer to the glass to see the activity unfold. Two officers stepped out of the cars along with Kathryn's father, Mr. Ottavi, and our social worker, Mrs. Dillard.

Steve turned his attention to his friend. Without a word, the two of them hustled to the front door. Soda pulled it open and watched and two police officers approach the house with Mr. Ottavi and Mrs. Dillard in tow. Nervous, my brother stepped out onto the porch to greet the small crowd. "Mrs. Dillard? Mr. Ottavi, is everything all right?"

The short, chubby woman forced a smile onto her face. "Sodapop, I heard about what happened to Scout and Darry. Come along inside. We need to talk?"

My heart began to pound in my chest when I heard her words. Ponyboy grabbed my hand in fear, and we sat together on the couch. Two-Bit sat on the arm of the couch as Sodapop and Steve walked in with the adult authority figures. The two officers opted to stay outside and wait on the front porch.

My hands began to tremble as I studied the solemn look on Mr. Ottavi's face. I looked to Two-Bit. He read my face and whispered, "No, Kathryn would have called you."

I whispered back, "What if she sent her father to tell us." My lower lip began to quiver.

Mr. Ottavi walked into the dining room. He looked around at the inside of the home. He had a file folder in his hand.

Mrs. Dillard noticed the sick look on everyone's faces. She put out her chubby hands in a gesture to calm everyone's anxiety a little. "For starters, I have been to the hospital and I spoke with Darry's doctors early this morning. He was unconscious through the night, but doing as well as can be expected. He is still in critical care and the reality of the situation is that he will be there for quite some time. The doctors explained to me that they plan to keep him in a deep sleep for at least a week. With his injury being life-threatening they want to make sure he doesn't have a chance to move until everything has a chance to begin to heal."

Two-Bit's round eyes showed severe concern. "So, he's going to be okay?"

"I'm sorry Keith, but no one knows that answer just yet. All we know is that the doctors are doing their best." Mrs. Dillard frowned and looked at Sodapop who was standing by the front door. "Soda, I think it'd be best if you had a seat on the couch with the other children while I explain the rest of the reason why Mr. Ottavi and I have come this morning."

The look on Soda's face grew suspicious, but he heeded the woman's suggestion and sat down on the couch next to Ponyboy. Steve sat by the front door in my mother's chair. Mrs. Dillard took in a deep breath and her eyes grew moist. "Mr. Ottavi called me very early this morning to tell me of the tragedy. The two of us met with Judge Carlson before the sun came up. He had great concerns about what would happen to you children without Darry to care for you."

Two-Bit stood up to take over the role as patriarch of our family. "What are you saying?"

Mr. Ottavi tossed his file folder onto the dining room table and stepped into the conversation. "What she is saying is that with Darry unconscious in the hospital the children don't have a guardian. We had a long discussion with Judge Carlson to convince him it's best for the family to stay together at a time like this. He didn't agree."

"What's it matter if he didn't agree?" Steve asked.

Mr. Ottavi sighed hard and looked at Mrs. Dillard. A wide frown filled her face. Mr. Ottavi cleared his throat. He turned his tall body toward us and shoved his hands into the pocket of his suit pants. "You know I really think you are all swell kids, and you need to know that Mrs. Dillard and I fought as hard as we could for all of you, but ultimately Judge Carlson has the final say in all of this." Mr. Ottavi looked at my oldest brother. "Soda, Mrs. Dillard and I were able to convince the judge that you should stay here to take care of the house and keep working full time. We identified Keith as a possibility to be your temporary guardian if he is willing to move in here and look after you until Darry can come home."

"Sure!" Two-Bit spoke up, "I'd be happy to watch over all of them."

"I'm afraid that just not possible." Mrs. Dillard joined the conversation. "Ponyboy and Scout, I'm sorry, but you aren't going to be able to stay home while Darry is in the hospital and out of work."

My jaw and Ponyboy's jaw dropped open in shock and disbelief. Sodapop angrily stood up in our defense. "What do you mean, they can't stay here. This is their home! Where are they supposed to go?"

Our social worker took a sure stance in order to calm our brother down. "Sodapop, you need to understand that we have a very serious situation here. Mr. Ottavi and I have spent the morning hours with Judge Carlson trying to make the best decision possible for all three of you."

Mr Ottavi interrupted. "We presented the Judge with a lot possibilities. Mrs. Ottavi and I even offered our home to Scout and Ponyboy, but Judge Carlson wouldn't have it."

"Why not?" Sodapop barked and nervously shifted his stance.

"Considering all of the problems your family has had in the past year the Judge decided it was his turn to decide what would be best for Ponyboy and Scout," Mr. Ottavi said.

Two-Bit asked. "What did he decide would be best?"

I grabbed onto Ponyboy's hand with my other hand, and the two of us looked to Mr. Ottavi and Mrs. Dillard for their answer. We knew it couldn't be good based on the way the two adults were avoiding having to tell us. Mrs. Dillard and Mr. Ottavi shared an uneasy glance. Mr. Ottavi took in a deep breath then shared the bad news. "I want the two of you to know that this isn't a permanent arrangement. We discussed this issue with Judge Carlson and he has agreed that when Darry is back home and employed full time you two can come home too."

Ponyboy's voice cracked a little when he spoke. "Where are we going?"

Sodapop's eyes filled with tears when he looked at the two of us huddled together on the couch. "They're going to stay together, right?" Steve stood up next to his friend and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

Mr. Ottavi looked to Sodapop. "Ponyboy will be going to the Barrington Home for Boys."

"What? You can't put him in a boys' home!" Two-Bit yelled out in frustration.

Mr. Ottavi raised his hand to quiet Two-Bit's vocal protest. The attorney continued with his answer, "Scout, will be attending Ashford Academy."

"You can't split them up!" Steve protested. "They've been together their whole lives. You can't split them up now. There has got to be a better solution."

"I'll take care of them." Two-Bit promised. "I've got a full time job. Between Soda and me we can be sure they get to school and everything."

"I'm afraid this is out of our hands." Mrs. Dillard sighed.

Ponyboy cried out the next question. "When do we need to go?"

Mr. Ottavi cringed before he answered. "Now, the officers are waiting."

"Are you serious?" Sodapop yelled out. Ponyboy shook his head in disbelief and sobbed harder. I wrapped my arm around him as the tears streamed down my face.

Steve yelled in disbelief, "Now? Why now? Why can't they stay till the end of the day?"

Mrs. Dillard answered. "Judge Carlson has arranged transportation to the facilities for this morning. The officers outside will be taking the children to their new homes."

"Can I at least go with them?" Soda's voice was high pitched as he held back tears.

Mrs. Dillard frowned. "I'm sorry Sodapop. They are going in separate cars to separate cities. You can't ride with them both, and I know you could never choose between the two of them. Don't you worry though, Mr. Ottavi has volunteered to go with Ponyboy to Barrington, and I will be riding along with Scout to help her settle into her new school. We would never think of leaving the children to go by their lonesome."

Ponyboy grabbed his head with his hands and continued to sob, "Soda, I don't want to go to no boys home. What if I don't go? What about Darry? I want to be here with him."

Sodapop flopped down onto the couch and gathered his brother under his arm. Soda let a few tears loose and pleaded for a better solution. "What do we got to do so the two of them don't have to leave? I'll do whatever it takes!"

Mr. Ottavi spoke softly to calm my brothers, "I'm sorry, but at this point we have done all we can do."

Soda began to sob harder. "Maybe we have to get a lawyer or something?"

"Two-Bit spoke up, "Yeah, I can help you afford one."

"Me too." Steve said.

Mr. Ottavi furrowed his brow for a quick second, and then realized Sodapop hadn't understood all the man had done so far. "Sodapop, I am your attorney, and it isn't going to cost you a thing. It may not seem like it, but I have fought all morning alongside Mrs. Dillard for your family. Considering the options that Judge Carlson presented, this deal really isn't so bad."

Mrs. Dillard blotted the corner of her teary eye with her handkerchief and looked to Sodapop. "Mr. Ottavi has done a wonderful job. You should know the Judge's first decision was to send you to a boys' home and put the twins up for adoption. Plus, you all need to bear in mind that this arrangement is only temporary. It is only until Darry gets better."

Ponyboy bawled and nearly yelled out his question. "What if he doesn't get better?"

I watched the adults exchange a glance that told me they were hiding secrets from us.

They knew that if Darry died the last time the three of us would see each other would be at our brother's funeral. I began to feel like there was little hope for Darry and little hope for us. Guilt nearly choked me as I swallowed hard.

Mr. Ottavi spoke assuredly, "We are not going to worry about that. Darry is a strong young man. I am sure he will pull through. Scout and Ponyboy just need to be cooperative and stay out of trouble. As soon as Darry is back on his feet I'll talk to Judge Carlson about you two coming home again."

Mrs. Dillard reiterated her earlier statement. "I know it's hard, but with everything that has happened this arrangement really is for the best. Especially, for Scout. Until the authorities find that boy she could be in a great deal of danger."

A silent pause fell across the room. The truth was everyone could still be in danger as long as James was on the lam.

Through my tears, I peered at the solemn faces in the room. All of them were downtrodden and their eyes were red and weepy, even Steve's eyes showed the pain that I had caused. Sadly, it was my 'cross to bear' and there was nothing I could do to change that. Mournfully, I lowered my head in shame. My hands trembled as I wiped the tears from my cheeks and muttered, "I guess I'll go pack."

I stood up to leave the room and Two-Bit grabbed my arm. "Scout?" He questioned with a whimper, "Are you okay?"

I looked at the man with a blank stare and shrugged my shoulders. "It's for the best."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve 

I hustled to my room hoping no one would follow me, but in the background I heard Steve tell his best friend that he would take care of it. I assumed, "it" was me. I headed down the hall and looked towards the back door. For a second, I considered not turning into my room. I thought about bolting out the backdoor and running away as fast as I could. I realized quickly that idea would have helped me, but not my brothers. They would have had to pay again for my mistake if I ran, so I walked into my room and shut the door for privacy. My nerves and emotions were on edge.

I knelt down and pulled an old suitcase out from under my bed. I hoisted it up and let it fall flat on my mattress. I reached down and pressed hard against the metal latches until they popped open to unlock the lid of the case. There was a knock at the door. I didn't answer, but that didn't matter because Steve walked in without an invitation. I tried to ignore him by pulling open a dresser drawer to begin packing for my move.

Steve was still dressed in the same DX uniform he had worn the day before, and he cleared his throat to speak. "Don't you worry none, Sissy. Two-Bit and I are going to do anything we can to help Soda out, and try to get you and Ponyboy home as fast as we can. You got that?"

I tried to sniffle back my emotions, and watched one of my tears fall into my drawer as mumbled. "I've got nothing."

Steve stepped towards me and laid a comforting hand on my shoulder. "That's not true. You got your brothers and me and Two-Bit…"

I interrupted and cried out, "No, I mean I've got nothing! I've got nothing to take to my new school. All of my clothes are still at the laundry mat and all I have to take are ratty old hand me downs. Everything is gone, and the outfit Owen bought me for my birthday was destroyed by James." I couldn't help but bawl. I hadn't thought of Owen all morning.

Steve stood shell-shocked for a moment then he spoke up. "I'll see if I can go get your clothes. I'll be right back." The boy turned and left the room.

I looked up at the mirror on my dresser and studied the pictures shoved between the frame and the glass. I pulled on a color photograph of Owen and held it in my hands. My knees went weak and I slumped to the floor. I looked into the boy's eyes and knew I wouldn't have the chance to say goodbye or to tell him how much I cared for him. Sobbing, I crawled over to my bed and pulled the suitcase down onto the wooden floor with a bang. I stuffed the photo into the satin lining for safekeeping. Then I reached up onto my dresser and pulled off a notepad and a pen. I wiped my nose with my sleeve before I began to scribble.

_Dear Owen, _

_I am so very sorry that I didn't have the chance to say goodbye. I will write to you when I can. I should have listened to you. I should have stayed in the car. I am sorry. Be safe. _

_Love forever,_

_Scout Marie Curtis_

I ripped the page out of the notebook just as Sodapop and Steve appeared in my doorway. I looked up at my brother and wept. "Soda, I wrote this note to Owen, will you make sure he gets it."

Sodapop tilted his head in pity and frowned in pain. My mother's look appeared on his face as tears streamed down his face and he quietly acknowledged my request. "Sure."

I hastily folded the page three times and handed it to my brother. "Be sure he gets this okay, Soda."

Sodapop grabbed the letter from me then he shoved it into the pocket of his blue jeans. He paused a second to look at me, on my knees crying. Sodapop stepped to me, fell to his knees and wrapped me in a tight hug. He cried, "Sissy, I want you to be good at your new school. Make Darry and me proud, okay?"

"Uh Huh." I sobbed back.

"Don't ever forget how much we love you. Okay?"

This time I was sobbing too hard to reply. Sodapop held on to me for a minute then he let me go a little. "Listen Sissy, we aint going to be able to get any of the clothes from the laundry mat, so just pack what you have okay? Mr. Ottavi says he will help me mail a lot of it to you when I get it back. He's going to pay for the postage stamps and everything." I nodded my head, but didn't speak. "Here, let me help you pack your things." Sodapop let go of me, and the two of us spent a half an hour rummaging through my room looking for anything I could pack that would be nice enough to wear at an elite all girl school. We packed my stuff into two of my mother's old suitcases. Sodapop carried the luggage out of my room.

"Scout?" Ponyboy's hoarse voiced called from my doorway. He walked into my room with his hands apprehensively shoved into the pockets of his jeans. "I'm all packed. Are you done packing your things?"

At first, I avoided looking at him. He was the person I loved the most in life and I had possibly ruined his life. That was a hard realization for me to live with. My reply was unintentionally snide, "it doesn't long to pack when you have nothing nice to take."

Uneasy, Ponyboy licked his lips and choked back his fears. "Scout, please don't be like that. Don't act as if this is all your fault, because it isn't." I turned my head and looked at my twin brother. His face was more pale than usual.

"Whose fault do you think it should be?" I asked with a sob.

"James!" Ponyboy demanded through his tears that I agree with him.

"No. I was the one who chose to date him and start this whole mess…"

"That's not true," Ponyboy interrupted. "At first, you didn't want to date him. Sodapop was the one who told you it would be okay. Everyone in the gang thought it would be a good thing."

"It was me who decided to ignore him when he got out of the reform school. It was me who didn't press charges on him yesterday. If I had…" Memories of Darry laying in his own blood flashed to my mind. I choked up then yelled out. "Darry would be here and not fighting for his life in some lonely hospital bed."

Ponyboy cried out in my defense. "Do you really think the police would have bothered to find James between the time he left the diner and the time he followed you to the laundry mat?"

Sodapop's arrival in the room was announced to us through his interruption into the conversation as he walked over to stand by Ponyboy's side. "Sissy, the cops would have never found him. He and his gang would have made sure of it."

"What if they had?" I challenged my brother's opinion.

"But they didn't!" Soda argued.

"If I would have said something maybe they could have, but I didn't give them that opportunity!"

"You said you didn't tell them because you didn't want to make things worse." Ponyboy tried to reason with me. "You were only doing what you thought was right."

"Well I was wrong!" I snapped and cried out, "All I did was make things worse. I broke up our family and probably killed our brother." My voice cracked as the words left my lips.

"He's not dead! He aint gonna be dead!" Sodapop sobbed and his lower lip began to quiver with pain. "And I aint going to stand here and listen to you go on and on about how all of this is your fault. The truth is, any one of us would have taken that knife if it meant saving your life. Aint that right, Ponyboy?"

Pony let out a teary, "Yeah."

Tears flowed from my eyes as I tried to reason with myself. "What about me? Huh? Why don't I get a choice? Why couldn't I be the one to die and spare Darry's life?"

"Cause he's tougher than you, that's why!" Sodapop said in a more soothing voice. "Cause it's his job to die protecting you. He's the man of the family. If he hadn't saved you he would have never been able to live with himself."

"What about what I have to live with?" I looked at my brothers for answers. "Darry is suffering because of me. I won't have time to patch things up with Casey before I leave. I don't even get the chance to tell Owen goodbye. Worst of all, it may be months before we see each other again, and I can't live with the fact that caused all that."

Ponyboy stepped toward me and cried out in a hoarse voice, "You don't have to, cause none of it is your fault. Nobody blames you." My brother grabbed me in a hug and I lunged into him squeezing him with every last ounce of energy I had. "I love you Ponyboy! I am so sorry I caused this mess!"

Pony squeezed hard and cried out, "It's not your fault Scout. I love you. I'm going to miss you the most." The two of us bawled then Sodapop joined the embrace and bawled along with us. 

Somehow, Sodapop managed to choke out a few words, "I love you two more than anything in this world!"

Moments later Mrs. Dillard appeared in the doorway to my room. She spoke softly as she let us know it was time for Ponyboy and I to leave for our new homes. Sodapop grabbed Ponyboy's hand and mine. The three of us walked together through the house and out to sidewalk where Mr. Ottavi was waiting.

He reached into his pocket and removed his wallet. "I want the two of you to know that I haven't given up on your case. I am going to do whatever it takes to convince the judge to bring you home as soon as possible. Till then, just know that you kids can ask me for anything." The man opened his wallet and pulled out three fifty-dollar bills. He handed one to each of us. "Soda, I expect you to spend this wisely. Ponyboy and Scout, you may have to buy a few things from time to time when you get where you are going. So be sure to keep your money safe."

All three of us accepted the gift without hesitation. Using my manners I thanked the man for the money and for helping my family as best he could. Two-Bit and Steve came up behind us with the suitcases. The boys handed the luggage to the officers. One officer loaded my suitcases into the truck of his police car as I stood at the end of our sidewalk wrapped in Sodapop's left arm. He slammed the trunk deck shut and walked to the side of the car. He pulled open the rear car door and looked to Mrs. Dillard.

The woman took a steadying breath and forced a smile. "Scout, we'd best be going."

The boys all whimpered at the cue, even Steve who couldn't seem to stand me most days. My nerves were riddled with guilt as the sound pierced my ears. In a small way, I was looking forward to getting away from the horrible mess I had made. I hugged each of the young men one last time then took a steadying breath myself. Stoically, I walked to the car, turned and waved goodbye, then climbed inside. As the officer and Mrs. Dillard climbed into the front seat I turned and knelt on the backseat so I could look out the rear window. The car lurched forward and pulled away making the weeping faces of my family and friends grow smaller and smaller. I put my hand up to the rear window as if I could touch them one last time, but all I could feel was the smooth, cold glass.

The car turned the corner and my family, street and home disappeared. A lump formed in my throat, and my eye caught the image of a familiar girl running up the street. Casey's flowing black hair bounced as she raced to the intersection that the car had just turned at. I pressed my hands against the window hoping she would see me. The girl stopped to study the car, then she waved uncontrollably as the car I was in sped away. Once she was out of sight I sunk into the brown vinyl car seat, curled into the fetal position and quietly cried myself to sleep.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

It had been hours since we left Tulsa when Mrs. Dillard woke me. I sat up, wiped the sleep from my eyes, and looked out the window. We were on a narrow, well-groomed road that seemed to wind though a lush wood. Seconds later the thick timber opened up to a grand driveway leading to and around the collection of large, brick colonial style buildings with their mutton bar windows and white trim. We had arrived at Ashford Academy. I studied the buildings as we drove past. The school looked like an ivy league college, and all of the girls on the grounds were dressed in knee length gray and blue plaid skirts. Some of the girls were in white blouses and some of them had on their required blue blazer. I wondered to myself if the uniforms were given to us, or if I would have to pay for them. I would hate to have no money for other things while I was here.

The squad car pulled up outside what appeared to be the main building. Mrs. Dillard turned to me. "Remain in the car. I shall return." With that she exited the vehicle, walked along the brown brick sidewalk, up the stone stairs and into the large building. I slumped down in the backseat hoping to not be seen and hoping the police officer wasn't interested in small talk.

"This looks like a pretty fancy school you'll be going to," the officer commented.

I rolled my eyes at the entrance of unwanted chitchat. I took in a deep breath and sighed. "Yeah, fancier than any place I've ever been."

"I bet you'll like it here." The officer said in a friendly way.

"I don't have much of a choice." I grumbled lowly and ended the conversation.

A few minutes later Mrs. Dillard waddled out of the main building with a small, white piece of paper in her hand. She climbed back into the car and held a semi-private conversation with the driver. He put the car into drive and headed down the brown brick driveway around the corner. We pulled to a stop at the rear of the building near a service entrance. My self-confidence sunk as I realized this is where I would be entering my new school for the first time. My social worker saw my displeasure. "Scout, you need to understand. If the other girls saw you come into the school all battered and bruised they would never understand." I opened my car door and climbed out of the car. I trusted the woman was right.

A tall, dark haired gentleman in an expensive suit emerged from the service doorway. He walked towards me with a small smile on his face. "Scout Curtis, I presume?"

"Yes Sir."

The man frowned a bit at my appearance then he gathered my hand in his. "I am Steven Donaldsen, Dean of Ashford. I am so sorry to have to meet you under these circumstances, but be assured we are very happy to have you at our Academy." The man escorted me along the sidewalk to the service entrance. "Come along, and I will show you to your temporary living quarters. Mrs. Dillard, right this way." My social worker followed behind us. As we ascended the more modest stone stairs in the rear of the building a young man emerged from the doorway. Mr. Donaldsen paused to give an order. "Jackson, please gather the young woman's belongings and bring them along."

"Right away, Sir." The young man replied and gave me a long stare followed by a welcoming smile. I smiled back, out of politeness, then continued into the building with my escort.

Mr. Donaldsen spoke as we walked down a long dim hallway. "Scout, you need to understand that it wouldn't be acceptable for you to begin attending lectures in the classroom in the condition you are in." I didn't comment, but purposely reached my hand up to cover the bruise on my face. The man pointed to the right as we met with two intersecting hallways. "Once the scrapes and bruises have healed we will place you in the dormitories with the other girls and allow you to begin attending classes. Till then, you will be staying in the infirmary. Your professors will send you the necessary textbooks and you will be required to begin your studies independently in the morning. I do hope you understand."

"Yes, Sir. I do." I did, and I appreciated the chance to heal before meeting the other students. I wouldn't want their first impressions of me to be tarnished by the truth that the worst day in their lives would probably be comparable to my best.

As we walked Mrs. Dillard began to ramble about all the school had to offer. Tennis courts, music classes, swimming pools and all of the other amenities money could buy. I thought about the fifty-dollar bill in my pocket and knew that I probably wouldn't be the best customer at the school store. Mr. Donaldsen stopped by a white paneled door with red trim. The sign on the outside simply said "Infirmary". The three of us proceeded into the large room. The ceilings in the room were at least fourteen feet high. The tile on the floor was black and white checkered and the walls were painted in a soothing mint green. A nurse, complete with a white dress, stockings, shoes and cap stood to greet us.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Donaldsen."

"Good Afternoon, Nurse Kelly. I would like to introduce you to Scout Curtis. She is the student we spoke of earlier today."

"Of course. Welcome, Scout. We are so happy to have you here." The nurse smiled perfectly. "My staff and I will be here to nurse you back to health, so let us know if there is anything you need to make your stay here in the infirmary more comfortable." One couldn't help but greet the beautiful women with the same welcoming gesture, so I smiled back. She gestured for us to follow her into the vast room with a row of beds on each wall and a white, matching curtain to separate each space. We walked through the infirmary passing a dozen beds that would have been suffice for me. Ten rows later, and at the end of the room the nurse stopped and gestured to her left. "Here is where you'll be staying."

I looked around at the completely empty facility and suddenly felt like an unwanted blemish. "All the way down here?"

Mr. Donaldsen explained, "We wanted you to have as much privacy as possible. Plus, at least at the end of the row you will have a window view." Mr. Donaldsen smiled and awaited my agreement. He was right, the only windows in the room were the four at my end of the room, and I had one near my bedside.

"You will find your nightclothes in the wardrobe. The women gestured to the small metal cabinet on the right side of the bed. "Nightclothes are required attire for all patients in the infirmary, no exceptions. Ashford Academy has taken the liberty of providing you with all necessary toiletry items. They are located above your sink in the medicine cabinet." Nurse Kelly motioned to tiny white sink on the right side of the bed. "When you should need to use the lavatory it is located at the front of the infirmary near the nurses station. You may have your belongs with you, but they are not to be unpacked while you are here. Any questions?"

I looked around the space one last time and felt overwhelmed by the change in my lifestyle. I pushed my hands into the pockets of my skirt and felt the money that Mr. Ottavi had given me. I looked up at Mr. Donaldsen and asked the one question that had entered my mind. "Will I need to purchase my own uniforms and school supplies?"

Mr. Donaldsen smiled and shook his head. "No, Scout. Here at Ashford Academy you are our guest. It is not often that we have a student of your intellect, so you provide stellar grades for our records and we will provide you with all of your basic necessities."

I nodded my head in agreement. I liked the idea of paying my way with my grades.

Nurse Kelly spoke up, "Well then, if there are no other questions why don't we leave you to change into your nightclothes and rest."

Mr. Donaldsen added on last direction. "In the morning, I will be back to inform you of your classes and provide you with your books."

"Mr. Donaldsen?" I asked, and he turned to look at me for my question. "Would I be able to make a call to my home? I'd like to tell my brother that I am here."

Nurse Kelly spoke up before the Dean could. "I am sorry, but infirmary patients are not allowed to place or receive phone calls. Once you are in the dormitories you may place calls on Saturdays and Sundays with your dorm mother's permission."

The news stung, and Mrs. Dillard spoke up in my defense. "Surely, you could make an exception considering Scout's case."

Nurse Kelly looked indignant. "Madam, the infirmary it not the place you should look for an exception."

Mrs. Dillard offered the woman a slightly evil eye, and then she spoke softly to me. "I'll talk to Sodapop first thing when I get back. You still have Ponyboy's address, don't you?"

"Yes, ma'am." I said quietly.

"Good." She said and reached into her large purse. She pulled out a light blue box tied up in a matching ribbon. "Before I go I want to you to have this. It's a box of stationary, a few pens and stamps so you can write to your brothers."

I took the beautiful box and gave Mrs. Dillard a hug. She hugged me back and then turned to hustle out of the infirmary as fast as her chubby legs would carry her. Mr. Donaldsen and Nurse Kelly followed, leaving me alone to change into my required nightclothes.

I pulled open the door on the white cabinet and pulled out a floor length, white, cotton nightgown. I hesitated to change out of the plaid skirt and red sweater set that Owen had given me for Christmas. I laid the nightgown on the bed and sat down beside it to gaze out the window that was furnished with white wooden accordion shades on the inside that could be pulled shut for privacy. I was just about to allow myself to cry when the sound of footsteps approaching caught my attention.

I turned my head to see Jackson arrive to the foot of my bed with my two suitcases in hand. I jumped up and tried to grab the luggage from him. "Here, those must be heavy, I can take them."

Jackson laughed and his grin made his slightly chubby cheeks buckle under the pressure. "I've managed to carry them this far. I am sure I can handle setting them down wherever you want me to."

I blushed with embarrassment and motioned to an open spot under the window. "Over there should be fine."

Jackson walked to the window and set the old suitcases down. He turned back to me, raised his dark brown eyebrows, looked down his long narrow nose and spoke in a deep voice. "I'm Jackson Wesley. I work maintenance around here." I studied the young man who stood just under six foot tall. His eyes were greenish blue and his hair was dark brown and wavy like Darry's hair. Even though his hair was grease free, and slightly tussled, he looked like the type of guy you would find in my neighborhood in Tulsa. He raised his eyebrows and shifted his weight. The young man pointed at my face. "Looks like you've had a bit of trouble."

I furrowed my brow. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Fair enough." Jackson said in good spirit. "Well, if you need anything or have any questions about Ashford Academy don't hesitate to ask." The young man rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet for a second.

I looked up at him. "Okay then. I'll let you know if I ever need anything." Jackson turned slowly and walked away. I could still hear his footsteps when I looked around my space and felt completely alone in the vast, sterile environment. Hearing the sound of his footsteps fade I yelled out. "Jackson?" His footsteps stopped and changed direction. He walked back and peeked his head around the half drawn curtain to look at me. I struggled to find something to say then I blurted out a question, "You really don't look old enough to be a maintenance man."

Jackson smiled and exhausted his breath through his nostrils. "That's because I got out of high school early for good behavior. I am actually doing an apprenticeship. Not that I ever aspired to be a maintenance man, but the pay is pretty good at a facility like this."

"Oh." I looked out the window at the budding green trees and beautiful blue sky. Thoughts of Darry jumped into my mind and my lower lip began to quiver as I tried to fight back feelings of sorrow.

Jackson noticed my sadness. "Listen, for what it's worth, you look like a sweet girl and whatever happened to you before you came here. I bet you didn't deserve it." Jackson waited again for a response, but I couldn't bear to speak and lose my composure. After another awkward moment of silence the young man offered one more smile that I didn't see and then he turned and left. This time, I didn't call him back.

I looked out the window again at the large, brick buildings. They each stood five stories high with charming white dormer windows protruding from the roofs. My new home was nothing like my old neighborhood. I turned around and eyed my stark white hospital like living arrangements. My lip trembled harder with emotional pain. I took one step forward then crumpled to my knees. Alone, on the cold floor, I clasped my hands together and cried, "I want to go home."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen 

I flipped the pen back and forth between my fingers and stared at the blank piece of paper. I studied the light blue color, which was a direct match to the stationary box it came in. My finger ran across the blank canvas. I liked the texture of the paper. It was almost a woven feel. Not smooth like notebook paper. There was no doubt this stationary was meant for elegant letter writing. It was meant to soak up the ink of an expensive pen. I shook my head in slight disappointment. I wanted to compose something, but I didn't know who to write to first, or what to say. I closed my eyes and tried to choose. Eventually, I put the pen to the paper and decided to address it to the first person to come to mind.

_Dear Sodapop and Darry,_

I stared at the names I had written and thought about how the other Ashford girls probably addressed their letters to, Mom and Dad. I thought about how Sodapop and Darry were my synonyms for, Mom and Dad. I sat back against my pillows and tried to imagine what life would have been like if my mom and dad had still been alive when I received the letter to Ashford Academy. Undoubtedly, my mom would have gushed to all the ladies that she knew, and some she didn't. She was proud of her children and she wasn't shy in sharing good news.

Memories of the day she learned I was advancing a grade returned to my mind. I remembered walking into the grocery store and she couldn't wipe the smile from her face. In aisle one, a friendly clerk routinely asked, "How do you do, madam."

"Just fine," Mom spoke with joy, "we are having a wonderful day."

"Is that so?" The clerk inquired further as he stocked the soup cans.

Mom's smile grew and she pointed in my direction. "My little girl just received notice that she is skipping forward a grade. Everyone in the family is so proud of her. She is such a smart girl."

"That's wonderful news!" The clerk appeased my mom's delight. He looked to me. "Congratulations, Dear!"

I remember her telling that news to at least a dozen people in the store that day. I imagine she would have done the same thing when Ashford came calling. I was sure my parents would have celebrated my entrance to such a prestigious school. I closed my eyes and pulled up an image of the two of them. One looked mostly like Soda and the other was nearly a twin to Darry. Sadly, those two brothers were my parents now, and life was hard for them because of it. Life was hard for them because of me.

My eyes opened and I looked up to the stark white curtain that outlined my personal space. How would I tell them that this was my room, that I was alone, that I was miserable? My focus returned to the textured page and I made my decision. For now, I wouldn't. I put the pen to the paper and embellished the truth.

_I hope you are both doing well. I miss you both terribly. Sodapop, when you see Darry next, tell him that I pray for him all the time and I can't wait for the day I hear he is awake and well. Tell him, I wish I could be there with him. I wish I could be there holding his hand the way he held mine whenever I needed him. Also, tell him that I am doing great! I am settling in to Ashford just fine. I have a nice room right now that is all my own. In a few weeks I'll probably get a roommate. I hope she is nice._

_I see the nurses here a lot. They are making sure that I am feeling well and healing from my injuries. Meals aren't too bad either. This morning I got to eat my breakfast in bed. Today I got my schedule of classes and schoolbooks. The work looks easy so I think I am going to do well here. _

_I hope you and Two-Bit are making good roommates. I keep thinking about the two of you spending your days listening to the radio too loud, cooking meals that no one can identify and having some wicked pillow fights. Go easy on him if you do, and don't forget to keep the house clean. I know how messy Two-Bit can get. In fact, I bet his mom is happy to have him out of the house. _

_I saw Casey going to our house when I was driving away. I hope the two of you didn't fight. I hate to think that you had to deal with her on top of everything else that has gone wrong. That wouldn't be fair to you. You have plenty to deal with. I bet Steve took care of her for you. I know I probably have never said this, but he is really a great friend for you. You can tell him I said that, and you can tell him I miss him too._

_  
I better get to my studies. Don't worry about me. Things are great here. I look forward to hearing from you. Write soon. _

_Love and miss you both, your sister,_

_Scout_

I reread the letter a few times to be sure that it sounded happy. I knew Sodapop would worry too much if he knew I was unhappy. I didn't want him to be worrying about me. He had enough to keep him busy there in Tulsa. I also didn't think I would be good for Darry to hear I was miserable. Information like that would be sure to slow his recovery. I couldn't have that because I wanted out of Ashford as soon as possible.

Satisfied with my first letter home, I folded the light blue sheet of paper, stuffed it inside the addressed envelope, and licked it shut. I stuffed the letter back into the stationary box, underneath the extra sheets of paper. I sure didn't want Nurse Kelly to know that I had written and stamped a letter. I worried she might take the letter from me before I had a chance to figure out how to mail it.

To be sure I was safe from getting caught I hopped out of bed and peeked around the corner of my curtain. I could see Nurse Kelly working at her desk on the far side of the infirmary. I new I had my privacy, so I scurried back to my bed, pulled out another sheet of stationary and began to write.

_Dear Ponyboy,_

_I hope everything at Barrington Home is going well for you. I miss you and I hate being apart. _

_Ashford Academy looks just like I had imagined it would be, but I haven't seen anything more than the infirmary. When I got here the school had me enter through the backdoor of the main building and go straight to my bed in the infirmary. Until my bruises clear up I am not allowed to leave my hospital bed. Truthfully, I'm miserable, how about you?_

_I just wrote a letter to Darry and Sodapop, but I didn't tell them how things really are here. I told them I am really happy. I don't want Soda to worry. So don't tell him anything about what I tell you. Okay? _

_So far, Ashford is terrible. The food they serve me is horrible and I am alone all day long. I have to spend most of my time in bed, but the view from my window is pretty good. Off in the distance I can see a line of trees and railroad tracks. At night when it is really quiet I can hear the train moving through the countryside. I asked the nurse here what line it is. She said she didn't know, but she was sure the train went through Oklahoma City and then on to Tulsa. I spent last evening dreaming about how cool it would be to escape from here and hop a train back to Tulsa. I bet those trains go right through our neighborhood. I could jump off by the steel mill and I bet no one would find me. I think tonight when I am bed I am going to dream about doing that. Maybe the train goes by Barrington and you could join me? If not for real, at least in our dreams we could see each other._

_Did you get a chance to see Casey before you left? I saw her running up the street. I hope she didn't show up to cause trouble with Sodapop. He doesn't need that. I know Steve would be sure to get her to go away if she was being trouble. Poor Soda. _

_Are you sleeping well? Not me. I had a nightmare last night. I dreamed that Darry passed away and the judge split us up for good. In the dream it was so bad that they made me move away and live with a family in Canada where they only spoke French. When I got there the family was really mean, and when they yelled at me I couldn't understand what they were saying! The nightmare was so bad that the night nurse found me on the floor screaming in the middle of the night. She told me that I was so loud she thought someone had been attacking me. I couldn't sleep after that. Every time I closed my eyes I thought of James coming to Ashford to get me, or worse, doing something to Sodapop. I hope the police find James soon. _

_I haven't received a letter from anyone yet, but the rules here don't let patients get letters in the infirmary. They don't let you send any either. So I might write this letter to you today, but you might not get to read it for weeks. That won't stop me though. I think I know a way to get my letters in the mail. _

_I still need to write to Owen, but I don't know what to say because I don't know what he has been told. I wish I could talk to him in person. Heck, I wish I could talk to all of you in person. I guess all I can do it pray that Darry gets better soon, and that the police find James and lock him up for life for what he has done._

_Take care and don't forget how much I love you, miss you and think of you all day long. _

_Love and miss you, your sister,_

_Scout_

On the sleeve of my nightgown I wiped the silent tears from my eyes. I folded the stationary and stuffed it into the envelope without rereading what I had written. I knew I couldn't have read my words again without bawling, but shoving the letter into the little blue envelope didn't help. My emotions choked me up. I turned in my bed, buried my head into my pillow, and bawled.

I hated being trapped at Ashford and not being able to know what was going on back home, or in Ponyboy's life. I wasn't used to being away from my family, and I didn't like it one bit. I cried so hard that Nurse Kelly came to my bed to check on me. I jumped when I heard her voice.

"Miss Curtis, are you alright?" she asked.

Hearing her voice reminded me that I was in the middle of doing something she would frown upon. I shoved the letter to Ponyboy under my pillow and out of sight with the light blue stationary box. I lifted my head and wiped my eyes before I turned to face the woman.

"Yes Ma'am." I sniffled back my emotions a little more. "I was just missing my home."

Nurse Kelly looked at me in displeasure, "Ashford girls don't cry about not being home. Most of these girls have been away from their homes and families for most of their lives. They are strong, confident young women. Perhaps you should work a little harder at being an Ashford girl."

I looked at the nurse and my mouth dropped slightly in shock. She stared back at me for a moment to be sure I wasn't going to sob any longer in her infirmary. When she was pleased that I was quite she smiled politely. "There you are. Strong and confident!" Then the woman turned and left me alone.

I pouted in my bed for a while, but I took the woman's words to heart. I thought about how so many of these girls never had relationships with their parents the way I did. I wondered how many of these girls had been at boarding school almost their whole lives. They didn't know their siblings or life outside of the school's regiment. For a moment I felt like the lucky one, but just for a moment.

I pulled a new sheet of stationary out of the box and began my final letter for the day.

_Dearest Owen,_

_I have no idea what you know about what happened, but I want you to know that I love and I miss you. I am safe here at Ashford, so don't worry about me._

I picked my pen up from the paper. Visions of James coming towards me and pinning my body to the ground entered my mind. I imagined Owen hearing that James had tried to force himself on me. I didn't know what Owen would think of the situation or how he would feel about me now. I tried, but I couldn't bring myself to write another word to him. I didn't know what he knew about the incident at the laundry mat, and I was too ashamed to tell him myself. I wiped more tears away. I took in a steadying breath and wrote,

_I will write again soon._

_Love Always,_

_Scout_

I gently folded the letter and placed it in an envelope. I pulled the stationary box out from under my pillow. I gathered all three of the completed letters in my hand and began to devise a plan as to how I could buck the infirmary rules and get my letters into the postal system.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

I picked up the book assigned for my literature class. I looked at the cover and sighed heavily at the title, The Grapes of Wrath. I shook my head in annoyance that the class would be studying a book I had read before. Lonely, I looked at the clock on the wall near the window. It was just before dinner and here I was in a long cotton nightgown. The same place I had been for the past three days - isolated with no one to talk to except the day and night nurses who took my temperature twice a day, iced my bruises, and worked hard to be sure I stayed tucked away in the corner of the infirmary.

Tossing the book aside, I opened the light blue box of stationary and pulled out the three stamped envelopes that contained letters to Sodapop, Ponyboy and Owen.

I climbed off my bed and walked over to the window. I peered out to the lush green lawn behind the building. A few yards away I noticed Jackson cutting through the grass headed to the service entrance of my building. I knocked on the window hoping he could hear me, but trying to avoid getting caught by Nurse Kelly. She had very strict rules for the infirmary, and she did not appreciate those who failed to keep quiet and stay tucked away in their beds. He didn't look. I knocked again a little harder, but I failed to draw his attention before he entered the building.

Disappointed, I looked down at the light blue letters in my hand. I pulled up on the skirt of my long nightgown, and walked across the black and white checkered floor back to my bed. I curled up in my bed and held the letters close to my heart. I'd have given almost anything to find a way to send the letters to my loved ones. I considered crying to release my frustrations, but a deep voice at the nurse's station drew my attention. I sat up in my bed and turned my head slightly hoping to improve my hearing. At first there was only a distant mumbling, but a moment later I heard approaching footsteps. I stashed the letters under my pillow and pulled at my nightgown to be sure my legs were covered before someone came around the curtain.

"Hi there!" Jackson sauntered around the corner followed by Nurse Kelly.

"Mr. Wesley says he needs to take a look at your sink." Nurse Kelly looked out the corner of her eye at the handyman. "He thought the drain may have been running a little slow." The lady looked to me for confirmation.

I looked back at her slightly confused by the information then I figured it out. I looked at the nurse and spoke assuredly, "Yes, Madam. I have noticed the drain was a little slow."

Nurse Kelly looked at me in a moment of suspicion. "Very well, Mr. Wesley will fix the drain, but when he is done I want you tucked into your bed. Those bruises aren't going to heal if you aren't getting your rest."

"Yes, Nurse Kelly."

Jackson stood near the curtain and watched the Nurse walk back to her station. Once he was sure she was out of earshot he walked he over to my sink. He turned on the hot water, watched the basin fill, and then drain without a problem. He looked to me and smiled. "I fixed your sink. It seems to be draining just fine now."

"Jackson, I'm glad you are here. I was hoping you could do something for me." I reached under my pillow and pulled out the three letters. "I was hoping you would do me a favor and put these in the outgoing mail."

Jackson looked to the letters and then looked back to me with a look of disgust. "Miss Curtis, the rules are, no communication comes into the infirmary and no information goes out!"

Shamefully, I lowered my eyes and held tightly to the envelopes. "I… I guess I just…"

The sound of Jackson laughing at me drew my attention back to him. He reached his hand out. "I'm just kidding. I'll get those letters to a mailbox right away. Besides, I always thought the rules around this place were a little peculiar." Jackson grabbed the letters and opened the lid of the toolbox he had carried to my bedside.

"Please don't lose those letters. They are really important."

Jackson smiled up at me. "I know." He reached into his toolbox and pulled out a few envelopes with a rubber band around them. "I thought these might have been important too. I grabbed them out of the mailbag today. I wanted to be sure you got them now and not a week from now when they finally release you from this sterile place." Jackson handed the envelopes to me and looked around the room.

I jumped off my bed, snatched them up, and quickly read the return addresses. There was one from Sodapop, one from Owen and one from Casey. Joyfully, I threw my arms around the young man. My senses noticed how good he smelled considering his position at Ashford. "Thank you so much, Jackson! These mean the world to me."

Jackson patted my back and I let him go. He closed the top of his toolbox and shrugged his shoulders. "Anything to help. I'll let you alone to read those. If I see anymore come through I'll be back to check on that drain again. How does that sound?"

I giggled a little and climbed up onto my bed. "That sounds great. You are the greatest!" With the compliment safely secured in his memory Jackson turned off the hot water and lifted up his toolbox from my bed. He looked back at me. "I have one question though. I wasn't trying to invade your privacy or anything, but who is Sodapop?"

I smiled at the question. "He's my brother."

"Why do you call him Sodapop."

I giggled at the question. "Because that's his name."

"Your brother's real name is Sodapop?"

"Yeah, do you think that is weird?"

Jackson chuckled. "Yeah, just a little."

"I have another brother, my twin, Ponyboy."

"You have a twin brother named Ponyboy?"

"Yeah." My smile faded slightly. "He's at Barrington Home for Boys right now."

Jackson's smile faded along with mine. "Is he there because of what happened to you?"

I looked at Jackson's face and realized he was thinking that Ponyboy was directly responsible for the bruises on my face. "No, well I mean, yes or kind of, but he didn't do this to me." I sighed. "It's complicated."

Jackson smiled to lighten the mood. "Don't worry about it. We don't have to talk about it. Just enjoy the letters, and get your rest. Okay?"

I looked back at my new friend. "Okay."

The boy turned and disappeared around the curtain.

I climbed underneath my covers and looked at the front of the envelopes one more time trying to decide which to read first. I took Casey and Owen's envelopes and hid them under the blanket. Quietly, I ripped open the top of Sodapop's envelope and pulled out the pages inside to read them.

_Scout,_

_I don't know what to say right now, but I felt like I should write to you so you dont feel alone. Alot has happened since you left this morning. Casey herd about Darry and came runing over hear to see you, but you had just pulled away when she showed up. She didnt look so good. Two-Bit asked her how she was doing. She said she's been miserable ever since she did what she did. Duke and her aint been getting along and she wants to get away from him. She said she might have to go back to New Mexico to be with her mom. I told her maybe she could move in with us to help pay the bills and stuff. She said she'd think about it. If she does move back in, don't worry about me. I learned my lesson. Her and I are over but she loves you alot and she is your friend. I am not going to do anything again to ruein that. _

_We went to the hospital in the afternoon, but Darry was the same. Doctors arent going to let him wake up for at least a week. They still dont want him to have any visitors either. Not even his own family. They said they didnt have any new news. Nothing good, nothing bad. I'll let you know if anything changes._

_Owen came by the hospital when I was there. He was pretty upset to hear about everything. That boy really loves you. I gave him your new address and he said he's going to try to send you something everyday he can. He was pretty hot at James for what he did to you and Darry. He left the hospital with his friend to go look for the boy. I kind of hope if he finds him he drags him back to our house so we can all work him over good. _

_Two-Bit went to his house to get some things and move in here. He and I are going to sleep in you room for awhile. That way we can keep an eye on each other at night. I dont trust James. I hope the fuzz does their job and finds him soon. Tim Sheppard stopped by the hospital to let us know if he finds that boy before the cops we won't ever have to worry about him bothering you again. Then he nodded and I knew he was serious about making James pay for what he did to you and Tim's girl. _

_It's only been a few hours since yall left, but I really miss the two of you. Ponyboy had a hard time after you left. He cried real hard and almost refused to get into the car and go. I thought they were going to cuff him and stuff him in the backseat till Two-Bit saved him. He talked him into calming down and getting in the car. Im more worried about Pony then Im you. I know you'll fit in right away at your school. I hope you are making friends and your new room is nice._

_I got to write to Pony and get this letter into the mail soon then I am going to get to bed cause I got to work in the morning. _

_Love and miss you, _

_Sodapop Curtis_

I read the letter and laughed at the poor grammar. Ponyboy was always harping on Soda to work harder on his writing. That memory made me smile. Then I read the letter two more times before I folded it and put it back into the envelope. I stuffed the opened envelope under my pillow and pulled out a new one. The return address was my home in Tulsa, but the name was Casey Dobbins. I paused a moment and looked at her handwriting. I thought about how the two of us were like sisters. We may have been if she hadn't been so cruel to my brother. Just as I grew angry I remembered that it wasn't just Casey who was thinking of other people. Soda had been thinking of Sandy too. If she had been in town he may have been the one to break Casey's heart and leave her crying. I tore open the top of the envelope. Right away I smelled the scent of the perfume that she loved to wear. The scent brought back memories of warm summer nights and long talks with my best friend about boys and growing into young women. Having Casey around for all those months was a great way for me to cope with the loss of my mother. I missed them both. I unfolded the page in the envelope and read.

To my best friend ever, 

_First, I want you to know that I am so sorry I ever hurt you and Soda or anyone in your family. Ya all mean so much to me that I didn't realize how much it would hurt ya all to have me acting the way I did. I am more sorry than you could ever know or I could ever tell ya. I am sorry for being so bad. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me someday. Till then I want you to know how much I miss you. _

_I ran over to your house this morning to talk to you but you weren't home anymore. I thought I saw you leaving in the cop car then Soda told me you had. Soda and me are kinda better. I suppose when something terrible happens it can really bring people together who maybe didn't get along before. Case you were wondering how I knew to come to your house, here is the story._

I looked up from the letter and giggled to myself. Casey wrote letters just like she spoke. With every word I read I could hear her voice carrying on. To be honest, I was surprised she used any periods or commas. The way she rambled on, I figured the letter would be one long run on sentence. I took in a deep breath and read on.

_I was working the morning shift at the restaurant when a few cops walked in and sat at the bar to order breakfast. They looked real tired and were discussing a few facts of a stabbing case they had been working on. I poured their coffee and eavesdropped on their conversation the way I always do when the cops come in for coffee I like to be nosey that way. They were trying to talk all secretive but when they said the name Scout I just knew they had been talking about you. How many other Scouts could there be in the city of Tulsa_

_I told them I knew who they were talking about and that they needed to tell me everything they knew. At first they told me no, then one of them asked for my name and how I knew you and if I would be help in anyway about the case. I told them sure my name is Casey Dobbins and I know Scout real well. They remembered what my dad had done and all so I think they were more willing to talk. Then they told me how you had been attacked by James and Darry had been stabbed trying to save you. I couldn't believe my ears. I wanted to run out of the restaurant to your house but the cops wouldn't let me. They stopped me and told me they had a few questions for me. A few! Jeepers they must have asked a hundred questions about your, me, Darry, James. Where he hung out where you hung out. They even asked me if I knew if you had ever… you know been to home plate with a boy. I told them no even though I knew better. I didn't want them to think you deserved to be treated that way James treated you, cause you didn't. After all their questions I took off running for your house. I don't like to run, but when you are scared or something you can run for a long time and not even feeling like you had been running aint that weird? So I finally got to your house and you were gone. I was so pissed at those cops! _

_I noticed the gang all trying to calm Pony down when I got there. That boy was fit to be tied. We almost needed a wrangler to come and tie him up to get him in that car. But that Two-Bit has a way with words. Hes a real sweetie and he was able to get Ponyboy to get in the car and go before the cop and the tall gray haired man lost their temper and sent Ponyboy off to the reformatory or something. _

_Then I talked to Soda and he told me everything I didn't already know. I cried a lot and told him I felt like some of this was my fault. I should have been there to be your friend and look after you. I wish I had. I told Soda that I was sorry for everything and he hugged me and cried and told me he didn't care about any of that. He wished me well and I told him most of everything with me wasn't well. _

_Turns out Buck aint nothing but a sweet talker with one thing on his mind. I know you already knew that and if I had been honest with you I probably wouldn't have gotten myself into such a horrible mess, but I did. Buck didn't really lie about everything though. He never said he loved me and he never said he wanted to love me. I guess I just was hoping he'd be the guy I always needed. I did like that he was an older man. He made the nights a little hotter, if you know what I mean. But in the end I wasn't the only girl getting hot for him or because of him. So I told him it was me only or I was out of there. Well, I'm out of there. I had been sleeping on the floor at the apartment of a cook at the restaurant, but his girlfriend aint to happy about that, so I gotta get out. I talked to Soda and he and twobit might be renting me a room. I promise to behave and leave him alone. You are too important to me to hurt you again. I love you and I promise to be good and I promise to do what ever I can to help out Soda and Darry so you can come home soon. _

_I miss you dearly,_

_Casey_

By the time I finished the last sentence I was in tears. I did love Casey and I needed her as a best friend. I decided if Sodapop can move on from what she did, then I could too. I planned to write her and tell her that after I read the letter from Owen. I stuffed Casey's letter back into the envelope and returned it to its hiding spot. I pulled Owen's letter out and stared at the south side of Tulsa address. He was a Soc, but not a typical one. He had a lot of misery in his life and knowing me sure added to his collection. Carefully, I tore open the envelope and pulled out stationary.

_Dear Scout,_

_The moment I noticed you hadn't come to school I knew something was wrong. Anytime you don't come to school it always seems end up being pretty bad. I worried all day that James had done something horrible to you and I hadn't been there to stop him. I hate that I was right. I should have never left you. I should have stayed with you and watched over you. _

_Pete and I left school as soon we could, to go and find you. We stopped at your house, but no one was home. Pete suggested we check the hospital. I asked for you at the information desk and the lady said she had a Curtis, but it was Darry and not you. When I heard that Darry was in the I.C.U., I couldn't believe it. Pete and I skipped the elevator and rushed up the stairs hoping to find you in the waiting room. When I came around the corner and saw Sodapop sitting there without you or Ponyboy, I was so spooked. He looked at me and by the look on his face, I thought he was going to tell me you were dead. I fell into the nearest chair and braced myself for the news. When I heard all about how Darry had been stabbed and how James had tried to force himself onto you, I was so mad. I was so angry that I took off with Pete to look for James. I drove every street in your neighborhood and checked as many diners and drug stores as I could. It's probably a good thing he couldn't be found. If I had found him, I think I would have killed him. That evening I headed back to your house. Casey was there. It should make you happier to know that I think things are better between her and Sodapop. She was ironing all the laundry and she had spent the day cleaning so Soda didn't have to. I wanted to stay mad at her because you were, but she really was trying to make things better. I know you don't know this, but she was an angel to everyone when you were in the hospital. I think she really loves you. _

_Sodapop came home while I was there and he gave me the note you left me and it broke my heart. I want you to know I was wrong too. I thought that you going off to Ashford would be a good thing. I thought I could handle you being gone because I was planning on leaving Tulsa too. Maybe it's the way you had to leave that makes it worse, but I am miserable without you and a whole day hasn't even gone by. I hate that you are there and I can't hold you and tell you that everything will be okay. I hate that you have to go through all of this all on your own. I hate myself for thinking I could be ever be without you. Because I can't. It hurts too much._

_But you are there now and there is nothing either of us can do about it. So I want you to work hard and do well at Ashford. I know you don't realize it, but being an Ashford girl will be a great thing for you. You do well while you are there and I promise to help take care of your family here. I'm also going to write a few letters to Ponyboy so he doesn't feel too alone. I heard he was pretty upset about having to leave. _

_I promise to come visit you when I can. You won't ever be off my mind. Do good! I love you and I miss you._

_Owen_

I wiped the tears from my eyes and tried hard to squeeze the lump out of my throat before I read the letter again. My heart ached for the way my life used to be.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

Jackson Wesley walked into my infirmary room with his toolbox in his hand. The two of us exchanged glances of conspiracy as Nurse Kelly finished changing my pillowcases and headed back to the nurses station with the dirty laundry. 

"I didn't have much to fix, so I thought I'd come back and check on that drain to be sure it was still draining well." Jackson said loud enough that he almost made his comment sound suspicious. Then he looked to me and raised his brown eyebrows a couple times to signify he was being sneaky and not planning on checking the drain. 

I giggled and hushed him. "Jackson, what are you doing? You're going to get us caught." 

Jackson sat on the edge of my bed and opened up his metal toolbox. "Look whose talking!" He chuckled back. "You know, stealing your mail is sure to get me in just as much trouble as you getting caught with it." 

"I know, but without these letters I probably would have died of loneliness in here. You have no idea how long two weeks can be when you are in Nurse Kelly's sterile environment." I said and jumped out of my bed. I walked over to the white metal linen wardrobe, removed the blue stationary box from the shelf, and placed it on the edge of the sink. Quickly, I pulled out the letters I had written, addressed, and stamped. I turned around to give them to Jackson and I ran right into his solid body. The two of us stood chest-to-chest and laugh quietly. 

"I'm sorry," he said with a wide grin that showed his high cheekbones. "I didn't know you were going to turn around so fast." 

I lifted the letters in my hand and squeezed them up between my new friend and myself. "I don't want to get caught! I'm almost out of here you know." 

"So I hear!" Jackson confirmed my statement and then took my letters and hid them in the bottom of his toolbox. 

I walked to my bedside and peeked under my pillow where Jackson and I agreed he would put my mail when he brought it by from time to time. There were a few letters waiting there for me. "Nurse Kelly said she was going to talk to Mr. Donaldsen and maybe get me out of here come dinner time." 

"That's good, because you received another package, and it's big."

My eyes widened. "That's the third one! I can't wait to find out who they are from."

"Well, when you get your room assigned I will personally deliver each and every box to you." Jackson said and closed the lid to his toolbox. 

I pulled my nightgown up a few inches and climbed up onto my bed next to the toolbox. "Jackson, thank you so much for being my friend here. You are such a sweetheart!" I put my arms out and invited the boy in for a hug. He leaned towards me, kissed my cheek and hugged me. By chance, I took in a deep breath and the musky smell of his cologne made my head swirl for just a second. A second after that, the two of us realized we hadn't let go of each other then we did so immediately. I smiled and commented, "Geez, a hug like that would have really gotten the two of us in trouble with Nurse Kelly."

"I hear you." Jackson said, as his face grew flush. Taking a short deep breath, he continued, "Once you get busy with classes and your roommates I won't be seeing you as much, so you take care. Okay?" 

I smiled at the young man and climbed back into my sheets. "I will, and I'll be seeing you around. I won't forget about you." 

"I don't want to hear tomorrow that you are still here. You dig that?"

"I dig it!" 

Jackson hoisted his toolbox off my bed and disappeared around the stark white curtain. I stared at the spot in the room where he had just left, and noticed that my heart was beating a little bit faster than it normally did. Inside, my tummy fluttered from the attention the boy had given me. He had been my knight in shinning armor for so many days that it was hard to imagine he wouldn't be able to stop by to see me in my dorm. In a way, leaving the infirmary meant loosing a friend, but I was hoping to make new ones soon. I reached under my pillow and pulled out the letters. There was one from Sodapop and one from Ponyboy. 

I decided to read Ponyboy's letter first. It was only the fourth one I had received from him and at last read he wasn't doing too well. Barrington Boys home had made him wash his hair and cut it short. He said he was so clean cut that if he showed up in our neighborhood with khaki pants and a madras jacket someone would have beat him up for being a Soc. I wrote him back telling him I think his short hair and khaki's would look nice on him. He was a sweet boy and dressing like a dirty old greaser wasn't the right look for him. I was sure he'd argue that with me. I pulled out the pages and opened them up. 

_Hey Sissy,_

_I hope by the time you get this letter you are out of that infirmary. It isn't fair that you have to be alone for so long. Have your bruises gone away? I haven't heard from Sodapop in a few days. He said in his last letter that they haven't found James. I bet he cut out to another state or something. Wherever he is, I sure hope they find him and punish him good. If they don't, I just might. _

_I know you only get your mail by secret delivery, so I am wondering if you had gotten Sodapop's letter a few days ago about Darry. When I heard they were going to let him wake from his coma soon, I started to bawl. Then guys around me started picking fun at me, so I ran to the bathroom to be alone. I am hoping once he wakes up Darry will get better fast and we can come home. I know that's a lot to wish for since he hasn't even gotten out of his hospital bed yet, but I can dream. Right?_

_I got a package from Mr. Ottavi a few days ago with all of my clothes from the laundry mat inside. Kathryn sent along a tin full of chocolate chip cookies. They tasted like heaven. I was sure to eat them all up as fast as I could. If I hadn't one of the guys in my room probably would have. I told you I have three roommates, two small bunk beds and one little room. Didn't I? I hate it. One thing is for sure, after being here, I am never joining the Army! _

_That sure is something about Casey and Sodapop living together. I mean I know she is just renting a room and all, but I would have never guessed it the way he was so upset over her two timing him. Soda is sure not like any other guy in this world. He is crazy! I wish I could be a little more like him sometimes. It would sure come in handy around here. I actually think he would like living in a boy's home. They don't care if you do well in school, they feed you three times a day, you can work in one of their shops to make a little money, and they have a ping-pong table and color TV. He wouldn't argue with that. Hell, I bet he and Two-Bit would find it real swell here. I think if I didn't have anyone waiting around for me, it could be okay. It isn't though. I miss everyone. _

_I haven't made many new friends since I wrote you last. Just Gus and Tommy so far. As far as pals go, they aren't too bad. Gus is awfully chubby, and he likes the attention he gets when the other kids pick on him, so they're mean to him all day long. Did I tell you he heard a rumor that his dad is getting out of prison soon? Gus isn't too excited, considering the last time his dad got out of prison he robbed a store the very next day. Gus figures his dad isn't going to even come and get him from Barrington. Sounds a little like what Johhny's dad wouldn't have done to him. _

_Tommy is the tough guy here and my roommate. He is a tall, lean, mean, son of a gun. I'm a glad he is my roommate and he likes me, or I'd have been scared to death of him. He's kind of like Dally. You like that he likes you because if he didn't you know you'd be in a lot of trouble. I sure to miss those two… Johnny and Dally that is. I hope you and your roommate get a long great when you finally get one. If she doesn't like you at first, just offer to do her homework. That's how Tommy and I became such good friends right away. He's so dumb he makes Soda look like a…_

I was so wrapped up in my letter I didn't hear the approaching footsteps until it was too late to stash the evidence. I looked up just in time to see Mr. Donaldsen come around the edge of the curtain with Nurse Kelly behind him. I looked at them, then at the letter, and then I stuffed the pages underneath my sheets and hoped they wouldn't question what they were or where they came from.

"Studying hard I see!" Mr. Donaldsen bellowed. "That is good. I was reviewing the student reports this morning and noticed that you are leading the school with all perfect scores, phenomenal!" 

Trying to extract the guilty look on my face I smiled and graciously accepted the compliment. "Thank you, Sir." I kept to myself my opinion that the honors courses at Ashford were hardly challenging for me. 

Mr. Donaldsen then took a stricter tone, "As you know, Scout, correspondence with others while you are in the infirmary is strictly prohibited." 

My stomach dropped and a frown fell on my face. I thought for sure I was headed for expulsion and Jackson was going to lose his job. Before I could open my mouth to offer an explanation Nurse Kelly spoke up with a wide smile. 

"But, considering the circumstances, both Mr. Donaldsen and I are in agreement it would be best for you to hear this news as soon as possible." 

Mr. Donaldsen stepped towards me and handed me a small yellow card. I took the heavy paper and read the outside, Northwestern Bell Telegram. I flipped open the card and noticed it was from Mr. Ottavi. I looked below his name and read the type. 

_James Young was arrested at 2:07pm this afternoon outside of Tulsa High School. He is being held on bond of $5,000. You can rest easy._

_Mr. Ottavi. _

Inside, my heart almost skipped a beat because of my excitement. I was so relieved that everyone I loved would be safe from that horrible boy. I looked up at the two adults who were looking back at me. I beamed with relief. "This is amazing news!" 

"We thought you would like to know that as soon as possible," Mr. Donaldsen said, "and there is more good news. Nurse Kelly tells me you will be ready to go to your dorm this evening. After you will be released from the infirmary, and I will personally take you to your new home in Covington House here at Ashford Academy." 

"Covington girls are the finest here at the Academy. They are all cut from the most excellent cloth. You should appreciate Mr. Donaldsen's gesture to allow you into Covington House," Nurse Kelly bragged. "It really is a privilege for you." 

"That's right." Mr. Donaldsen boasted. "Covington House ladies are the most sought after debutants in all of Oklahoma! With your intellect and beauty you should be a good fit there." 

"Thank you, Sir." That was all I could think to say. I began to worry that if the girls at Covington House were the wealthiest in all of Oklahoma I didn't figure a poor gal from the north side of Tulsa would be a good fit at all. 

"Carry on with your studies. We will see you after dinner." Mr. Donaldsen said and then ushered Nurse Kelly from my area. I looked at the telegram once more and hoped Sodapop, the gang, and Owen had all heard the news. I planned to write Ponyboy and tell him the good news as soon as I moved into my new room. I let a grin of happiness cross my face, and I returned to Ponyboy's letter.

… _rocket scientist!_

_Well, I don't have much more to say and the dinner bell just rang so I have to go soon. I'm sure you will ace that test on the book The Grapes of Wrath. If you don't I'll probably die of shock. I'm glad to hear you are writing to Darry. I hadn't thought about doing that because he was asleep and all. I actually wrote a short letter to him right before I wrote to you. I am going to send it in Sodapop's envelope. _

_I received another letter from Owen. He didn't have a whole lot to say. Just that he misses us both. I am sure he misses you more than me. He also said the track coach talked to him the other day and told him to tell me 'hi'. That was cool to hear the coach was thinking about me, who'd figure. Another bad part of Barrington is that they sell you smokes really cheap and I've been going through almost a pack a day. I was kind of hoping that being here would help me kick that habit, but no such luck. _

_Take care, I love and miss you. _

_Ponyboy_

As with every letter, I read it more than once, but I didn't cry. I hadn't cried over letters from home for a few days. I figured that was because I was adjusting to my new life. That was a talent I had perfected, adjusting to something I didn't want to be a part of. I stuffed Ponyboy's letter under my pillow and pulled out the second one. Immediately, I noticed Sodapop's handwriting seemed rushed. Before I read the script I worried that something tragic had happened.

_Sissy,_

_I just got back from the hospital and I have great news! _

Great news? I hadn't heard that from home in a long time. I read on.

_I went to the hospital after work and found out Darry is awake! Kathryn was there and she had just talked to the doctors and they said he is gonna to be fine! He is leavin the intensve care unit today! Isnt that great news? I know you know it is. I just wish I was there to see you when you read that. _

Today? I grabbed the envelope and flipped it over to read the postmark. The letter left Tulsa two days ago. I was so excited by the news that I kicked my feet and giggled softly in my bed before I read on. 

_He is very week and he can barely speek but Kathryn said the first thing he did was ask about you. He was so worried that you were dead. He had remembered everything that had happened, he said he even remembered dreaming of you getting killed. Kathyrn said when she told him you were fine he was so releeved that he laid there and bawled. They didn't tell him nothin after that till I got there. The docs let me tell him about what happened and where you and Ponyboy were and he got real sad again. I told him you two were happy where you were and things were real well. Then I read your letters to him. He liked hearing them. He made me read them more than once. I did even though I dont like reading too much. When I left the hospital for the night he made me put the letters from you and Ponyboy where he could reach them. _

_You should see him Scout. He dont look so good. He is real pale and he lost a lot of weight._

_Steve, Two-bit and Kathryn have helped out a lot at the hospital the same way they helped out when you were in the hospital. I aint told him about Casey living at our house. Kathryn says thats a good choice. He does not need no more worries then he already has. Things have been fine with Casey. Her and I dont mess around. She pays ten dollars a week in rent and does nearly all the cleaning. Shes real sorry about all the trouble she caused and she and me talked a long time one night about everything even bout how I think I still love Sandy and we feel better. I hope you feel better about it all too. I really want you to._

_I am sorry this letter is short. I need to write to Ponyboy and get this letter in the mail soon. Darry wants me to tell you that he loves you. I love you too. _

_Miss you lots and lots._

_Sodapop Curtis_

I read the news again. Darry is awake and talking. I got so excited I couldn't sit still. I jumped off my bed and danced and cheered, completely forgetting that I was required to be in my bed and quiet. I hushed up just long enough to hear Nurse Kelly racing to see what I was doing. Quickly, I reached down and threw my blankets over the letters. I turned around in time to see Nurse Kelly standing before me with surprise on her face. 

"What is going on back here?" 

"Nothing." I thought quickly for an excuse. "I was just celebrating that they had finally arrested that boy." I stared at Nurse Kelly and she stared back at me. Then she crossed her arms across her chest. 

"Get your shower things together. I want you to bathe and dress before you are discharged." Nurse Kelly turned and walked away. I folded up the letters and hid them in the satin lining of my suitcases before gathering my shower tote and heading to the washroom.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter Seventeen Chapter Seventeen

I stood outside the dormitory with a new garment bag hung over my bent arm. Inside were my three Ashford uniforms and a new pair of shoes, free of charge. Behind me the night maintenance man stood quietly with my suitcases in his hand. Mr. Donaldsen stood to my right and rang the doorbell. While we waited, I looked above the thick ornamental wood door and read the words, Covington House, carved in stone above the door. An older woman answered. She appeared to be in her sixties with a decade old hairdo and she was dressed in a pale flower dress.

"Good evening, Miss Lemon." Mr. Donaldsen greeted her. "This is your new Covington House resident we spoke about, Scout Curtis."

"Good evening, Miss Curtis, it's a pleasure to meet you. I am Miss Lemon, the house mother for Covington House." The older woman waved us inside and walked over to a thick rope hanging from the ceiling near the staircase. She gave it a strong tug, which in turn led to the deep ringing of bells throughout the house. From the upper floor I heard the voices of young girls warning others that there was a man in the house. Miss Lemon turned to me. "Whenever you hear the bells ring you will know there is a man entering Convington House. Men are not allowed into the house unannounced. All young ladies must return to their rooms and remain there until the bells are rung a second time. Do you understand?"

"Yes ma'am." I responded.

"Miss Lemon will get you settled in," Mr. Donaldsen said, "I am going to leave you two to get things in order. Miss Lemon, as always, thank you for all you do here at Ashford." Mr. Donaldsen patted the woman on the shoulder.

"My pleasure Sir," Miss Lemon beamed at the man. "It is my honor to have a hand in raising the finest young women in Oklahoma." She bid the man goodbye and I did the same. Mr. Donaldsen closed the front door behind him as he left. The wooden door made a loud echoing sound through the hallway as Miss Lemon, the quiet maintenance man, and I ascended up the first flight of wooden stairs.

"I want you to know ahead of time who your roommate will be." Miss Lemon alerted me as we climbed the second set of stairs. "Lacey McGovern, heiress to the McGovern Motor Parts Company. You need to know that she can be a bit harsh towards her roommates, but considering the side of Tulsa you are from you should do just fine with her."

I looked at the woman as I processed in my mind what she meant by her comment, 'considering the side of Tulsa you are from'. I sought to question what she meant, but decided against it. I didn't want to know what preconceived notions Ashford had about me.

"If you ever have problems with your roommate, and I am sure you will." Miss Lemon clarified for me. "Miss McGovern has a habit of going through a lot of roommates; she doesn't like to share much. You will need to report the problem to the Covington housing committee."

"Who is the Covington Housing committee?" I asked.

"Your peers," Miss Lemon simply said as we reached the third floor and turned to our right to head down the hall.

We walked past a dozen doors. Some were closed and others were barely open with girls peering out of them to see what was happening. I smiled at the girls I saw to hide the fact that I was anxious about my new living arrangement. We walked to the room at the end of the hall and Miss Lemon knocked twice on the door then opened it and greeted the girl inside. "Miss McGovern, your new roommate has arrived."

The girl in the room had long amber colored hair that cascaded off her slender shoulders to the small of her back. Her face was as beautiful as the girls you find in the JC Penny catalog. I couldn't help but stare as she stared back at me and crossed her arms across her chest. "Miss Lemon! I told you that I did not want another roommate!"

Miss Lemon took on an authoritative tone. "Miss McGovern, whom rooms with whom is not your choice, and may I remind you, your own parents require you to have a roommate whenever possible. It's possible now and it is for your own good."

Lacey gave a snarled look to Miss Lemon.

Wanting to be polite and use my manners I stepped forward to introduce myself. "I'm Scout Curtis." I said as the maintenance man walked in behind me, set the suitcases down by the unmade bed and left the room.

Lacey curled her lip in repulsion. "Scout? You're name is Scout?"

"Yes." I answered and looked down to the floor and wished I was back in the infirmary.

"Better you than me." Lacey mumbled under her breath then grabbed a book off of her desk and flopped onto her bed to pretend to read.

Miss Lemon looked down at my two old suitcases and concern spread across her face. "Miss Curtis, will you be needing bed linens, or did you bring a set with you?"

I looked at the beautiful bed Miss McGovern had made up. Her bed was turned down and it showed pink satin sheets underneath a white fluffy down comforter with pink piping for trim. I frowned a little and looked at Miss Lemon. I spoke just loud enough for the older lady to hear me. "No maam, I did not bring a set of linens with me."

"Then I will go and fetch you some." The lady said and she disappeared from the room.

I stood quietly by my bed. There was no exchange of conversation between Lacey and I. Nervously, I looked around the room. Her side was filled with framed photos of family members and posters of famous people. My side had a plain wall and an empty bulletin board.

Miss Lemon came back into the room and set a pile of linens down on my bare mattress. "Here are your bed clothes. The lavatory is down the hall near the staircase. If you need me, my room is on first floor right at the bottom of the stairs. Just look for the placard on the door. Have a good evening girls." With that, Miss Lemon walked out of the room and closed the door behind her.

I turned to my new roommate and attempted to start a conversation. "So…how many years have you attended Ashford?"

Lacey looked over at me, and her straight hair flipped behind her shoulder. "Listen, I don't want a roommate and I'm not looking for any new friends. I don't care who you are, and judging by your first name and ratty suitcases, I don't need to."

The beautiful girl's nastiness stunned me. She was horribly rude for a girl of her supposed stature, and certainly not how I had envisioned a debutant to be. I turned back to my bed to avoid conflict. I thought about Miss. Lemon's words on the way up the stairs. I was going to have to be tuff to tolerate this girl. I decided to keep quiet and make up my bed up. Miss Lemon had given me plain white sheets and an old blue and white patchwork quilt. I assumed a past debutante who didn't appreciate the amount of work that went into the hand made item had left it behind. Looking at the quilt, I was impressed with the craftsmanship and happy to have it.

Down the hall I heard the bells ring as I pulled my suitcases up on my bed and opened the lids. I grabbed a handful of clothes and walked over to the dresser on my side of the room. I pulled open the top drawer and filled it with the few clothes I had decided to bring. I finished with one suitcase, but left my letters, and pictures from home safely hidden inside because I didn't have any wallboard tacks and wasn't ready for my roommate to notice either of my brother's names.

I opened the second suitcase and pulled out the long, light blue gown I wore to the Winter Formal at the Tulsa Country Club. I hung the gown in the closet and lined my shoes up on the floor. I walked back to the case and grabbed an armful of undergarments to put in my dresser drawers. Behind me the door opened, and a gaggle of girls strolled in. I turned around to smile at the girls. I hoped they had come to welcome me and I would be able to make a new friend or two. The girls all gathered on and near Lacey's bed. Softly, I said hi.

"Lacey," one girl sang out, "aren't you going to introduce us to your new roommate?"

"Ladies, this is SCOUT Curtis," Lacey announced with arrogance in her voice, "don't get used to her, though. If I have my way I will have my own room again in a week."

One girl with a curly blond ponytail laughed out loud then spoke up. "Your name is Scout? Your parents must really have hated you."

I scowled at the girl and one of her friends with dark brown eyes and hair took notice. She confronted my expression. "Come on, it's no secret that parents who didn't really ever want kids end up with the worst names. Tucker knows all about it, don't ya Tuck?"

The same curly haired blond spoke up again. "Don't I ever. My dad named me after a car of all things, and I've been in boarding school since I was six years old. The last thing my folks want around is me."

Wounded again by my name, I stood up for myself. "My parents liked me fine."

"Yeah, right." Tucker said. "If they did you probably wouldn't be here."

"It wasn't their choice to send me here."

The brown-eyed girl spoke up again, "what do you mean? If they didn't send you here, who did?"

"Oh No!" Lacey eyes lit up with realization and she yelled out and stood up from her bed. "Oh no, no, no!"

"What?" Tucker asked and stood up with her friend and looked at me.

Lacey pointed at me with her long slender finger. "You're the girl."

I gave Lacey a confused look. My heart rate began to beat faster as nervousness took a hold of me. What did she mean I am 'the girl'? The girl who was attacked, the girl who was shot, the girl whose parents were killed? I swallowed hard.

Lacey looked at me in disgust. "You're Ashford Academy's first charity case! I should have known when I saw those crappy suitcases. Argh!"

I was the girl with no money. That's who I was to her.

"Charity case?" A second blond girl asked, "Do you mean she's the girl who received the academic scholarship the board of directors decided to give out."

Lacey began to rant. "No way! I am not rooming with some…some… scourge of the earth poverty girl!"

Tucker laughed out loud. "See Lacey, I told you to stick with your last roommate. She may have been annoying, but at least her family had money. This is down right pathetic." Tucker looked over her shoulder at me.

Lacey looked at me again and pointed to my half unpacked suitcase. "Don't bother unpacking anymore. You're not staying here! Come on girls, we are going to talk to Miss Lemon. Covington House is no place for a charity case." Lacey stormed out of the room and her friends followed.

The door swung shut and I stood in my new room alone again. My heart sank. I didn't want to cry, but I knew I was going to. I turned and dove into my newly made bed. I buried my head into the pillow and bawled. For the first time in a long time I fell into self-pity as I whimpered. "Why me? Why is my life so hard all of the time?"

A good while later, when my eyes were dry, the door to my room opened again. This time Lacey walked in with an indignant look on her face. Miss Lemon followed behind her with a girl I hadn't yet met. I sat up on my bed and looked at the group.

Lacey threw herself onto her bed in a pout. Miss Lemon stood between our beds and spoke with authority. "Ladies, I want you both to know I will have no fighting from either of you throughout your time here at Ashford. That kind of behavior is unbecoming of a young lady."

"Yes, ma'am." I said softly. Lacey didn't reply.

Miss Lemon looked to me and continued. "Miss McGovern has been informed that Due to past incidents of representing a lack of candor on her part it is the wish of the President of the Board of Directors here at Ashford that she receive a roommate from whom she can learn diversity and appreciation. Miss Curtis, you have been selected by the President to be that roommate. There will be no changing that, so I don't want to hear another peep from either of you concerning this arrangement. Understood?"

"Yes, ma'am." I said softly again but wished I had the courage to scream instead. There was no doubt that Lacey and I already had one thing in common, we both wanted a new roommate.

Miss McGovern did not speak until Miss Lemon gave her a stern look and with her silence she demanded an answer. Lacey then groaned, "Yes."

"Good." Miss Lemon said with satisfaction. "Miss Curtis, I want you to meet Miss Maria Kinsley. Miss Kinsley is the Lady Representative for Covington House and an accomplished student in demeanor and academics. Please note the four gold star pins she has on her uniform lapel. These pins are earned through grades, grace and service to the school. I highly recommend you strive to work towards earning a pin in the coming weeks."

The short girl with her brunette hair pulled into a barrette stepped forward to greet me. "On behalf of Covington House I want to welcome you to our school. It is our honor to be able to give you a real chance at a successful life." The girl then offered me a genuine smile.

My smile was forced as I began to boil with anger on the inside about being the only scholarship student at Ashford. With false enthusiasm I returned the greeting. "Thank you."

Miss Lemon took a step back and spoke to the two veteran Academy girls. "As you two know, Covington House has always been the home to the older girls here at Ashford Academy, but Miss Curtis is our first exception to this rule. While the rest of you are required to be at least sixteen years of age to pledge to room in Covington, Scout is not. She is younger than you, so I expect you to take care of her. She has been placed here due to her outstanding academic achievements, which greatly exceed those of other girls her own age. Mr. Donaldsen and the Board of Directors felt it would be best for her to be with students who will most likely be in her upper academic classes."

"Congratulations, Scout. That is a wonderful accomplishment," Maria complimented me.

"Thank you," I said as Lacey rolled her eyes.

"So, with that said, I expect the riff here to mend itself quickly and quietly. It's mighty close to lights out, so be sure to finish your studies and wash up for bed." Miss Lemon stated then turned and left the room with Miss Kinsley in tow.

I sat on my bed in the silence and stared at the wooden floor. Both my roommate and I were stuck at Ashford whether we liked it or not, so I took a chance at starting over. I looked over at my roommate. "Lacey, if you ever need help I want you to know that I'd be happy to help you with your homework."

Lacey looked back at me with a curled lip and a snarl. "Charity, I let you in on a little secret. Women of wealth and beauty, like myself, don't need good grades. We have everything you could ever dream of just by virtue of being born to it."


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter Eighteen

**Chapter Eighteen**

_Tick, tick._

My eyes opened in my room and my hearing perked up to the surprising sound. Across the room I could hear Lacey slowly breathing in and out. It wasn't the sound that had pulled me from my sleep. I sat up in my bed and turned my head a little hoping to hear the sound again. I waited…

Nothing.

Then… _Tick, tick, tick._

This time I was able to target the sound. Something was hitting the glass panes of my window. Curious, I crawled up my bed to the window above my headboard. I peered out the window into the moonlight and saw the dark figures below. The cool night air rushed in when I pushed the double paned window open. I leaned out and looked down trying to determine what was going on. Below in the grass three familiar faces wrestled around, drinking, laughing, and amusing themselves. I blinked my eyes for clarity and noticed my brother was in motion to toss a few more pebbles towards my window.

"Sodapop!" I screamed in elation. Happiness swarmed my senses.

My brother ceased his motion and grinned up at me. "Sissy! There you are, we've been looking all night for you." Two-Bit and Steve, who were clearly drunk, hung on my brother and looked in my direction and laughed.

Two-Bit drawled out an idea, "Sissy, we didn't come all this way to see you hangin' out the window. Quit your gazin' and get on down here!"

I looked down at the three crazy boys. I was in awe to see that they had come all this way to see me, unannounced and unauthorized. I tried to scream in a whisper, "Soda, it's probably two in the morning! What are you doing here?"

"We came to see you!" Sodapop yelled back. "Get on down here!"

"Yeah, hurry up. We aint got all night." Steve yelled louder than the other two had.

"Shhhh." I shushed the boys and looked over at my roommate. Fortunately, she was still sound asleep, but I didn't know about anyone else in the building. I leaned back out the window. "Alright, just shush and I'll be right down."

"You do that!" Sodapop yelled again and took a swig of the beer he was holding.

"Yeah Scout! We aint got all night!" Steve hollered and grinned with delight.

I took one long look at the threesome then ran out of my room and down the main stairway. With no concern for consequences I ran out of the front door of Covington house in my cutoff sweatpants and my dad's old t-shirt. My bare feet slapped against the stone steps as I dashed towards my brother who was running to meet up with me. The two of us jumped into each other's arms with such force that we spun around and fell to the grass. Two-Bit didn't waste a moment as he dove on top of us to join into the fun.

Steve ran to the pile and spanked me hard on the buttocks to show that he cared. "What the hell took you so long?" He playfully harassed me.

Giggling uncontrollably I pulled back from tight embrace and looked at Soda's eyes. "You're all are crazy! How did you get here? How did you know where I lived?" We sat up.

"What's it matter?" Two-Bit answered my questions with a question. "We're here, what more do you want?"

I shrugged my shoulder and looked up at Steve. "It really doesn't matter, I am just so happy you all are here."

"Damn straight, Sissy!" Steve howled a little and his breath smelled like liquor. "We came all this way just to see you."

I looked into my brother's smiling eyes, laughed, and hugged him again. "I love you, Sodapop. I missed you so much!"

Sodapop grabbed me and pushed away from my embrace. "Knock it off!"

"What?" I laughed in disbelief and questioned what he wanted me to do.

"Knock it off!" The voice commanded again. My eyes popped open to darkness. I was in my bed and my roommate was shaking me awake and scolding me. "Would you be quiet? Other people are trying to sleep!" Lacey stormed back to her bed and threw her covers over top of herself.

I laid flat on my back in my bed and disappointment washed over my emotions. Sometimes I hated how real my dreams were to me. Even though I could hear the laughter and feel the hug it had all been just a dream. Sodapop wasn't here. None of the boys were. It had been more than two weeks since I had hugged him or spoken with him, and I had more than a week to wait until I received communication privileges.

Lacey lay awake in her bed and declared her disappointment with me. "You are so dumb."

I knew my roommate's comments were not true, but I had no idea what I had said or done in my sleep, so I worried. I was good at that.

When the sun came up I wandered into the third floor communal bathroom to prepare for my first morning of classes. Before I could get into the shower I noticed the eyes of the other girls fall upon me, and a hush filled the room. My heart sunk as I realized there was sure to be trouble. Lacey's friends began to giggle to themselves then Lacey whispered something to Tucker. The two of them laughed loudly.

In front of everyone Tucker stepped towards me, her wet hair wrapped in a towel stacked on top of her head. "You know, if you love and miss your soda pop so much you can buy some in the commissary."

"I highly doubt it," Rita chimed in, "I bet she doesn't have a penny to her name." The group of girls snickered at the suggestion. Rita embraced the attention and added to her insult. "But if special little Charity wanted to she could probably negotiate a few free sodas for free from the Board of Directors." The room burst into laugher again.

I smiled to hide my anger and looked into the mirror. I pretended to check my hair and be satisfied with what I saw. Without a word I turned and left the bathroom, devastated.

Feeling alone and like an outcast I threw my hair into a ponytail. I quickly dressed in my uniform and left for the cafeteria. As I walked the confrontations with Lacey played over and over in my mind. She didn't like me and it was quite clear that she was hell bent on having everyone she knew at Ashford not like me too. I decided that for my own emotional survival I needed to return to my old defenses. They were the same ones that had worked for me for so many years, avoidance and solitude.

By design, I didn't make a single new friend in any of my classes. I was relieved when my first day was over, and I could return to the semi-solitude of my dorm room in the afternoon. I stacked my homework on my desk, sat down on my bed, and heard the bells ring in the corridor. There was a man in the house, but my interest wasn't peaked. Instead of rushing to the door like the other girls did I stayed on my bed and slipped off my shoes. A moment later, I heard footsteps on my floor coming in my direction then my door eased its way open. I only glanced at the person coming into the room because I didn't want to chance making eye contact with Lacey or her friends. I was surprised to see Jackson walk through the doorway carrying a huge cardboard box. My defenses faded and I was relieved to see a friend. A smile spread across my face and I stood up to help him guide the box to my bed. The young man put the box down and offered me a smile.

"I went by the mailroom this afternoon to get your boxes and saw that you hadn't picked up any of your mail."

I looked down to the floor, too ashamed to tell Jackson how bad the first twenty-four hours in Covington House had been. "I wasn't sure where to go to get the letters."

"Oh that's easy." Jackson said, "The mailroom is in the main building where the infirmary was. Go in through the front door and the mailboxes are in a little room off to your right. You can't miss it." I nodded my head and read the address tag on the top of the box. Jackson tilted his head a little and looked at me before speaking again. "So, how was your…" Jackson cut his words off as he heard my roommate come through the door. He looked over his shoulder and watched the girl walk across the room. The two made eye contact and stared at each other as if they had already met. Lacey flopped onto her bed and Jackson turned his attention back to me. "Miss Curtis, I have two more boxes to bring up, so I'll go fetch them for you."

I looked to Lacey who was staring at Jackson who was staring at me. I responded. "I'll help you bring them up." I slipped on my shoes and followed the maintenance man out of my room. The two of us walked down the hall in silence, but in the stairwell Jackson leaned toward me and spoke in a low guarded tone.

"I'm sorry to see that your roommate is Lacey McGovern."

I answered. "I noticed you already know her."

Jackson kept quiet as a few girls passed us in the stairwell. We didn't speak again while we were inside of Covington House. I used the silence to torture myself and think about what Jackson's reason for knowing Lacey would be. The last thing I needed was to have the one person I considered a friend be influenced by her too. We walked outside the house and as soon as the door shut behind us Jackson looked to me. "Lacey and I had a run in once. She had a thing for me when I first got here, but I wasn't too interested in being her houseboy, if you get my drift. I don't think she was too happy to be rejected. "

I felt a rush of relief wash over me. I responded simply, "I see."

Jackson looked down at me. "Do you two get along?"

I shook my head and was honest with my friend. "Not so far."

"Why not?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "It's kind of like a rich girl, poor girl sort of thing."

Jackson stopped along side of his Ashford Academy pick up truck and threw his arm up on the metal box. He hitched the thumb on his other hand into the pocket of his work slacks and looked at me with a questioning grin. "Are you the rich girl, or the poor girl?"

I grimaced a bit when I realized I had disclosed to him what he hadn't assumed. I looked to the ground and answered. "Well… compared to her… I'm the poor girl." Jackson stood silent and I avoided eye contact as I tried to imagine what he was thinking. When he didn't respond I tried to salvage the conversation with a crooked grin. "You didn't really think I was rich, did you?"

"I just figured you were because everyone else is."

"Everyone but me," I replied, "sure makes it hard to fit in."

"No doubt." Jackson said and reached into the box of the pick up truck and handed me a shoebox wrapped in brown paper. I read the return address and giggled. Jackson noticed and inquired, "Is that a good one to get?"

"It's from my boyfriend."

"Your boyfriend?" Jackson asked and slapped a pile of letters onto the box I was holding. Then he reached into the truck box and lifted a bigger package into his arms. "I should have guessed a girl like you would have a boyfriend."

I eyed the maintenance man and noticed the look on his face suggesting that Owen would be mad that I had made friends with a boy. I giggled again. "Don't sweat it Jackson, he is not the jealous type." I playfully knocked my hip into Jackson's hip and the two of us took the boxes to my room. I led the way in and found Lacey lying provocatively on her bed with her shirt unbuttoned one button too far and her skirt hoisted up far above her knee. I ignored her pose and discreetly stuffed the box from Owen and the stack of letters under my bed. Jackson followed me in to the room and noticed Lacey's attention seeking behavior.

"Afternoon, Miss McGovern." He said with a teasing southern charm and set the box down on the floor.

"Evening." Lacey said and batted her eyes at the young man. "I see you've met my roommate, Scout."

"Sure have." Jackson answered back. Then he turned to me and raised his eyebrows the way he had done before when he was trying to communicate with me in a secretive way.

"So, as I was saying, the best place to study is in the library on the 3rd floor. About fifteen minutes from now it should be almost vacant and awfully quiet. I think you'll enjoy it."

I smiled politely at the suggestion. "Thank you Mr. Wesley. I will take the idea into consideration." I turned away from the man and he walked out of the room. Lacey ignored me by pretending to read a schoolbook. The bells rang again signaling the building was free of men. I gathered my homework and left for the library.

I didn't want to arrive too soon, so I paced myself as I walked along the brick pathways that led to the library. Quietly, I entered and climbed the open wooden staircase to the third floor. Jackson was right. The level was completely vacant of people. Seeing Jackson wasn't waiting at one of the study tables in the main area I headed along the bookshelves to search for another set of library tables. Without warning a strong hand grabbed my arm and pulled me in between the book stacks. Jackson and I bumped together and we both laughed in a whisper. I looked up at him and he pressed his finger to his lip to be sure I stayed shushed. With a grin he pulled me through the stack of books to the other end of the aisle where smaller library tables were set for studying and we were sure to have more privacy.

I leaned my backside against one of the study tables and Jackson rested his backside against the end of the bookshelf. He spoke first. "I wasn't sure if you'd come."

"Well, it was a tough choice," I said sarcastically, "Stay in my room and be ignored by Lacey or come here and chat with you."

"I can't stand that girl." Jackson grinned. "Good choice."

"I'm full of good choices." I said with a grin that faded rapidly as I realized the untruth I had told. Good choices didn't seem to come easily for me in the past month.

Jackson noticed my mood turn to gray, so he fought to keep the conversation between us alive. "So, those were some pretty heavy boxes I brought up to your room. Did you get anything good from home?"

I looked up at him. "I didn't take the time to open them, but I am pretty sure the big boxes are just my clothes from the laundry mat."

"Why did you have your clothes shipped from the laundry mat?" Jackson asked with a disbelieving grin and rested his hands on his hips. "I thought you were the poor girl?"

Absent mindedly, I explained, "Since the area was still considered part of the crime scene I couldn't bring any of them with me."

I watched as Jackson's eyes widened in confusion. "Crime scene?"

Slight panic set in as I realized I had let my guard down too far. "Um… it's nothing. You know what… I really do have to study, so I will see you around. Okay?" I gathered my books and held them against my chest in a guarded stance and turned to flee.

"Wait a second." Jackson said with concern and put his strong arm up to block my escape. "Why are you leaving?"

I stopped abruptly to keep from walking into his stiff arm that blocked my way. "I really do have homework, but thanks for suggesting this area. I think this will be a great place to study." I tried to back away.

Jackson stepped towards me and calmly grabbed my arm. His gentle, round eyes begged for a clue to my past. "What happened at the laundry mat?"

"Nothing." I replied, but Jackson gave me a stern, disappointed look that melted my defenses a bit more. "It was no big deal, just a little neighborhood fight."

I stepped backwards again. Jackson crossed his arms across his chest like Darry would when he demanded the truth from us. "Who was involved in the fight?"

I smiled nervously. "Just some kids from Tulsa, you wouldn't know anyone."

"Try me." Jackson insisted. "Because I know this one girl who arrived at the school awhile back, and it sure looked like she had been in a fight with someone."

I lied to keep Jackson from investigating further. "Well… you see… there were these two guys in a fight at the laundry mat I was at. Stupidly, I tried to help make peace between them. That's all."

Jackson exhaled his silent disappointment that I didn't trust to tell him the truth. "Okay, if that's the way you want to tell it, that's the way I'll believe it."

"What? It's the truth!"

"I know," Jackson said to let me off the hook. He relaxed his stance and smiled. "I've got a lot of work left to do, so I'll let you get to your studies."

I smiled at my friend. "Thanks."

"No problem." Jackson winked at me, smiled and walked away.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter Nineteen

After dinner I put away the clothes Mr. Ottavi had graciously shipped to me, and I cracked open the tin full of cookies Kathryn included in the box. I ate two of them and thought about what Ponyboy had written in his letter. He was right the cookies were delicious. I wanted them to last and I knew I couldn't trust my roommate, so I put the lid back on the tin and hid it underneath my bed.

Kneeling down, I looked over my shoulder to be sure the dorm door was shut tight then I pulled the box from Owen out from it's hiding spot under the bed. I sat on my bed with my legs crossed then I ripped through the brown paper the box was wrapped in revealing a Buster Brown shoebox. I lifted the lid to find a ten-dollar bill resting on top of a new pink polo shirt and a pair of Capri length khakis. I took the money and thought of how sweet it was that Owen wanted to make sure I was well taken care of. I put the cash in the top drawer of my nightstand. I pulled out the new clothes, stripped off my school uniform, and slipped on my new duds-a perfect fit. At the bottom of the box I noticed a folded letter. I pulled it out and read.

_Dear Scout,_

_I can't believe it has almost been a month since we have seen each other or heard each other's voices. Everyday is hard for me to go to school and see your empty desk in class. It just about kills me. I can only imagine how much harder it must be for you. Hang in there, as soon as I am allowed I am coming to see you. Maybe I'll even bring along a few of your favorite people. _

_I sent along some money just in case you needed it. I hope you enjoy your new outfit. I took Bethany downtown and she helped me pick it out. She assured me it would be the right size. I hope it fits and you love it. _

_This may seem funny, but being apart from you has me thinking a lot about football and college. At school today the girls put up a banner for tryouts for next years cheerleading squad. Try outs are in two weeks. I talked to Charlotte and Bethany to see if there was any chance you could try out when you come home for the summer. They said they would talk with Mrs. Furlong to see if she will allow it. I know you haven't ever said you want to be on the cheer squad, but I am hoping you will be. I don't think I have ever told you about how I'd always dreamt that someday I'd be on the field playing football and then I would come to the sideline, take off my helmet, and see my girl on the sidelines cheering on me and my team. After all, you're my girl and I think that's the way it should be. I hope you will give it some thought. _

_Remember on the couch the day you had trouble with James I told you I was going to go to college no matter what and we were destined to be apart. I don't know what I was thinking. Leaving you behind won't be as easy as I had thought, but I guess we can talk about that more when you get home. I just hope all goes well and you get to come home sooner than later. _

_I was talking with the Ottavi's at the country club last Sunday and he said he'd do what he could to get you home. Mrs. Ottavi said she was talking about you at her ladies bridge club and a few of her friends said they may consider adopting you if the judge decides Darry can't be your guardian anymore. That way it can be assured the you will be well taken care of. That was a relief to hear, but she didn't say anything about Ponyboy. _

_Everything else here is just the same old thing. I am working more than I was- I know you are thinking that's impossible, but I am working at my cemetery and at Jasper Hills Cemetery on the west side of town. Our caretaker for the place has decided after 45 years to retire. Jasper Hills is the biggest cemetery we own so dad has started looking for someone to run the place. It's too big of a job for me to do alone and dad says he's too busy to help out. I don't care much about having to work. At least it helps to keep you off my mind. Not that I like that, but I like that. _

_I go over to see your brothers every once in awhile. I like to visit, but it is really hard to be with them without you. Everything around here is a little harder without you. _

_I am counting the days till I can call you and I can come to visit! Don't forget how much I love you. _

_Owen_

The smile on my face almost made my cheeks hurt. Without a doubt, I loved that boy. We were perfect for each other in so many ways. Some may say we were too young for each other, but I would disagree. I stuffed the letter into my nightstand drawer with the other ones then I grabbed another from the stack of unread letters.

_Dear Scout,_

_As always I hope everything is dandy at the school. Darry is doing so well. He is up and walking and the docs are hoping he will be ready to come home in a week but he wont be able to go back to work roofin houses. Doc says it will be a long time till he has the strength to do that again. Same goes for the job at the rail yards he aint going to be ready for that ether. He could pump gas but it dont pay enough to prove to the judge that we are ready for you and Ponyboy to come home. Two-Bit said he could get him a bagger or cheker job down at the grocery store so he might do that. We aint got no idea what to do but dont worry about it we'll figure it out. _

_I wanted to send you some money this time but I aint got none extra. I hope you dont need any. Two-Bit and Casey are both given me money for groceries and Casey pays some rent but without Darry working things are tighter than they ever have been. We talk to Ponyboy once a week and our phone bills cost a fortune now but its worth every penny. Once we can start calling you I bet we will go broke for sure! I am looking forward to it. _

_I am glad to hear how great things have been at Ashford. I sure hope the school is not so great that you decide to stay there. I know that might be best for you but I would miss you too much. I am glad you wrote Darry to tell him how much you like it there. He was really worried you would have a tough time being away. _

_Darrys birthday is coming up soon. Theres no money to buy him nothing. Two-Bit offered to swipe him something nice from a store that he didnt work at but I told him no. I think Darry would waste all his energy strangling him for stealin cause Darry says he don't need nothing. Casey plans to bake a cake for him and Kathryn will probably buy him something. She has been helping out a lot. I think she feels guilty or something for makin Darry leave you alone at the laundrymat. Shes brought us a bunch of dinners in the past weeks. Shes a good cook so if she hooked up with Darry maybe we wouldn't have to eat each others cooking so much! I sure miss your cooking and Darrys too. Ponyboys dinners I don't miss so much. A bunch of times I go to the restaurant and eat when Caseys working. She always smuggles me free extra food as long as I buy a soda. Then she gets to bring some food home every once inawhile to. _

_I guess I dont have much more to write right now. Casey put a piece of paper on the icebox to count down the days till you can receive a phone call. I cant wait to call you on the phone. I dont like writin so much but you knew that already. _

_Love ya lots,_

_Sodapop Curtis_

I sighed heavy as I thought of how much I wanted to be at home. I wished I could be pumping gas or working at the restaurant to help out. There weren't a lot of jobs I could do at my age, but I would find one.

I dug thought the remaining envelopes and read the return addresses. There was one from Kathryn that was postmarked back to a few days after I had arrived to the school. Another one from Kathryn had a more recent date. There was another letter from Owen, two from Casey and one from Ponyboy and one with a very recent postmark. The letter at the bottom of the pile caught my attention as I recognized the handwriting. It was from Darry. I tore into the envelope and fished out the letter that was written on a piece of hospital stationary.

_Baby Girl,_

_I bet you weren't expecting to see a letter from me, but as soon as I could get the nurses to give me a pen and paper I wrote to Ponyboy and now to you. _

_I want to be sure you are doing well and behaving yourself. I know the way you ended up at Ashford wasn't the best plan, but you are there now so I want you to remember how much you could use a scholarship to college. Be sure to do your best they way I know you can!_

_Life at the hospital has been a pretty big bore. I don't know how you handled being here for so long. Your favorite nurse Norma Rae stops by whenever she is working. She asks about you and Pony and she is still flirting with Sodapop. She calls him "her little soft drink". It's pretty funny but I am about to go crazy being stuck here! I am behaving though. I am hoping they let me out early on good behavior. _

_I see Sodapop everyday and Casey, Steve and Two-Bit stop by when they can. Everyone has been working real hard to keep things together and the bills paid. Owen came by the hospital the other day to talk to me about football and cars and stuff. Then he went to the house and left a bunch of bags of groceries for everyone. Don't tell Soda, but I like that kid a lot. I like him more than I ever liked Sandy. _

_It sounds like Casey and Sodapop are doing well at the house. Two-Bit says they've been keeping their hands to themselves. It sounds like they have figured out a way to be just friends. I think that is good for Soda. He could really use a gal to just take care of him and not the other way around. He doesn't need a girl around messing with his head. _

_You'll be happy to know that being stuck in bed has really got me thinking more about me too. Kathryn has been by my side for a lot of nights and I know you'll be happy to hear that I'm considering giving more of my time to her. Maybe life is too short not to try. _

_You be sure to be good. I am real happy to hear how great things have been for you. You deserve to be in a safe and happy place. I love you a ton and I can't wait to be home so I can call and talk to you. Get good grades and I miss you._

_Your brother, _

_Darry. _

I reread the letter again and could hear Darry's voice in my head speaking the words on the page. I was so relieved to receive a letter from him. In a way, I hoped it meant I was that much closer to getting home. I felt a tear form in my eye, but I held in my emotions just in time as heard my roommate outside of my room. In a hurry I pushed my pile of letters into the shoebox and hid them under my bed.

I looked up at my cranky roommate and continued with my futile attempt to have her like me. "Did you have a nice dinner?"

Lacey looked over at me and responded in a sarcastic tone. "I have been eating dinners at Ashford for half of my life. None of them have been nice; so quit trying to make things nice between the two of us. I'm not interested in having someone like you for a friend."

I frowned with slight disappointment, but I agreed with her. After a few days with her I didn't want her for a friend either. I didn't have time to return to the rest of my letters for a full day. When I did, I finished reading them all, most of them twice. It took me another day to find time to write back. By the light of the moon I finished the one letter that I felt I could be honest in.

_Dear Ponyboy, _

_It's official; I am now a resident of the Covington House dormitory. I was released from the infirmary two days ago and so far my entire experience here at Ashford has been nothing but miserable. You need to be sure not to tell anyone back home about any of this because they have plenty to worry about on their own, pinky swear? _

_My roommate, Miss Lacey McGovern, is a horrible witch and her friends in Covington house are no better. I had barely begun to unpack when she learned I was at Ashford Academy on a scholarship, and to make the matter worse I am the very first girl to ever have a scholarship to the school Now, keep in mint that to you and me a scholarship means accomplishment, but to rich, spoiled princesses a scholarship only means, poor! _

_When Lacey discovered she had to room with a poor girl she through a hissy fit and ran off to complaining to our housemother, Miss Lemon. Miss Lemon isn't much better than Lacey when it comes to judging a person. She had warned me about my roommate being sour, but she told me that I could handle it because of the side of Tulsa I came from. She all but called me a greaser! It was humiliating, but not as humiliating as the torment Lacey has put me through in just a short while. She has taken to calling me Charity Case and she introduces me as such. The way I see it the girl is lucky I'm not a greaser or I would have punched her lights out by now. Sometimes, deep in my mind I hear Dallas's voice saying, 'go on Sissy, show her what you are made of.' _

_I don't mean to complain, but I really want to go home. Life here is miserable and I don't see it getting any better anytime soon. Sometimes I wonder what we ever did to deserve al the grief our family has gotten. _

_I haven't made any new friends because I am afraid to try. I fear their all more spoiled rotten then the next one. I don't think there is anyone here I can trust other than Jackson, and he's just the janitor!_

_I'll tell you what Ponyboy, I'd rather have no luck at all then the bad luck I've been having. _

_You better be sure to keep all of this to yourself. No one back home needs to know any of this. They couldn't do anything to change it anyway. I already wrote to Darry and Soda and told them how great things are since I moved into the dorm. I didn't even tell Owen about the trouble I've been having or even who my roommate is. I fear that with my bad luck Owen and Lacey would probably be old friends from the Country Club or something. _

_I miss you so much everyday. I don't cry as much as I used to, but sometimes when I am alone I think of you and my heartbreaks and a tear or two roll down my face. I miss you terribly. I can't wait for Darry to get back on his feet. That way we can both go home where we belong. _

_Take care, I love you and be sure not to tell the others how bad Ashford really is. _

_Miss you, _

_Scout_

I folded up the letter and sealed it inside a stamped envelope. I looked over at my roommate in her pink satin sheets and felt a rush of envy run through my veins. I loathed the girl and there wasn't much that would change those feelings now. Just for safekeeping I slid the envelope under my pillow and closed my eyes to get some much needed sleep.

Days later Ponyboy leaned against the concrete wall in the hallway of his Barrington dormitory. He had the phone wedged between his shoulder and his ear and my letter unfolded in another hand. "Soda, I got another letter from Scout today and things are pretty miserable for her…"


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty Chapter Twenty

By the end of the week I had resigned myself to the fact that Lacey had no interest in befriending me, but I didn't think that gave her the right to belittle me. Word around campus had quickly spread that I was the local charity case and Lacey was also successful in convincing half the school that I was crazy too. She shared endless whispers with others about stories of my nightmares, sleepwalking and sleep talking.

Every time I saw her whispering to another student and looking at a rumble of rage coursed through my blood. Between my paranoia and her tale telling I was completely devastated and girlfriendless.

I grew more and more infuriated with my roommate each time I saw her sneer or heard her voice. I daydreamed of getting even and there was nothing I wanted more than to punch her right between the eyes. I knew that Dally or Steve would have coached me to do so already, but I didn't. I was raised better than that, and I didn't want Lacey to get the best of me. So, instead of fighting back, I just stood by and let her call me names, humiliate me, and flaunt her parent's money in my face.

I had only a few more days until I earned the privilege of phone calls and visitors, so I kept my guard up and counted down the days until I could hear the voices of my brothers and friends. Even though it was Saturday night, and all of the other girls were spending time together or home visiting their families, I was in my room pretending to be enjoying the comfort of my solitude as I lay in my bed rereading one of my favorite letters from Kathryn.

_Dear Scout,_

_I hope Ashford Academy is everything you dreamed it would be. I am sure you are fitting in nicely and meeting so many wonderful girls. I know it is hard to be away from home, but embrace the opportunity and don't worry too much about Tulsa. Sodapop, Two-Bit, Casey and I are doing everything we can to help out._

_I must tell you that I am absolutely devastated over what has happened to you and your family. I often sit in my dorm room and wonder what would have happened if I had stayed away and not come by to talk with Darry. I think to myself that James wouldn't have been given the opportunity to hurt you if I hadn't been selfish for Darry's attention. But I needed to tell your brother how much I really cared for him. I had tried to fall for other boys who had less responsibility, but I could never get rid of my feelings for Darry. I love him and I told him so that night. _

_At a time like this I think you need to know how proud he is of you and how much he loves you. When we were outside sitting in my car he told me about the trouble you had been having with James. He was really worried for you. He wanted you to go to Ashford Academy so you could get away from the dangers of your neighborhood. He wants you and Ponyboy to be able to go to college more than anything. He loves you and he has committed himself to you and your brothers. Knowing that gives me the strength to believe he will pull through this. When he does, I'll be there waiting for him. I love him…_

My dorm room door swung open and I folded up the letter. While Lacey and her friends filed into the room I stuffed the letter under my pillow to hide it.

Lacey stopped in front of me and shoved her hands onto her slender hips. "Charity, you need to leave. My friends and I need this room to ourselves."

I stared at the ceiling and didn't respond. I didn't plan on following her demands.

"Get out!" She insisted and hitched her thumb towards the door.

I didn't move.

Seeing she wasn't in control Lacey shot a look to her friends. "See why I hate all my roommates! Let's just meet and ignore her."

A girl with long black hair, Rita, spoke in agreement. "It's not like she's going to know who we are talking about anyway."

"Yeah," Tucker responded. "I don't think we'll have to worry about her ever becoming a member of our Wealthy Bachelor Club. None of our favorite bachelors would give her a second look." The girls all laughed together.

I rolled my eyes.

The other blond in the room, Kristen, chimed in. "They would never give her a first look!"

Rita said, "I don't know about that, we all know that each of the bachelors we talk about will find themselves involved in charity work at some point or another." The high pitch of the loud laughter pierced my ears as I tried not to let their horrible comments rattle me, but they did.

"Come on girls, just forget about her." Lacey looked to her friends and announced, "I hereby declare this month's meeting of the W. B. C. to order!" Then Lacey reached under her bed and pulled out a hardcover scrapbook stuffed full of paper notes and photographs. She opened the book to the marked page and began her meeting. "This month's bachelor is tall, rich, and handsome."

"Aren't they all?" Kristen giggled.

Lacey opened the scrapbook and threw a few photos out onto her bedspread that the girls snatched up. "Ralph Wenset of the Wenset Lumber Mills."

"He is absolutely delicious," Tucker said and licked her cherry red lips.

The collection of debutantes ogled over the boy and shared stories of when they had met him and how much money they estimated his family had. Listening to their superficial conversation started to make me jealous. It wasn't fair that mean girls like them would no doubt end up with a millionaire's son in the next decade. These girls would never know life as I had known it. They would never have to struggle for what they needed. Then, somewhere in my sulking my ears perked up to their conversation.

"…Good looking or not, I am simply not interested! Lest you forget I plan to be the future Mrs. Owen Jasper."

Instantly, I turned my head to look over to my roommate. Maybe I was more a member of the W.B.C. than they wanted me to be.

"He is so fine!" Rita declared about my boyfriend.

With half of a smirk on my face I asked, "Are you talking about Owen Jasper from Tulsa?"

Lacey sneered at me. "Charity, you are not part of this conversation."

Rita looked in my direction. "It's not as if you know him, so bud out."

"Really?" I asked and propped my self up on my elbow, happy to challenge her. "He goes to Tulsa High, right?"

Tucker threw her head back in annoyance. "Just because you go to school with the upper class doesn't mean you know them."

"He's the star running back on the football team and works for his father's company, right?" 

"What is your point?" Tucker asked with exasperation

"My point is that I highly doubt a girl like Lacey will ever be Mrs. Owen Jasper."

"That's a pretty bold statement, even for you." Kristen barked.

"Yeah, what makes you say that?" Tucker snapped.

A devilish grin spread across my face as I realized I had something the W.B.C. girls did not. "Because the Owen Jasper you are referring to is in love with me."

"No way!" Rita waved me off with her hand.

"You're a liar!" Lacey cackled and glared at me.

Smugly, I responded, "I have the love letters to prove it."

"Let's see 'em." Tucker requested and crawled off of Lacey's bed.

Graciously, I reached into the drawer of my nightstand and pulled out a stack of envelopes addressed from Owen. Tucker walked over to confirm the return address on the envelopes. "Holy Shi…" she said, being careful not to fully commit to her swear.

"Letters with his return address don't mean a thing." Rita chimed in.

Lacey snapped, "There is no way Owen Jasper would date a girl like you."

"I have a handful of letters that say different," I said and waved the stack of letters. "And his letterman's sweater is in my dresser drawer."

Lacey's blood began to boil as she snarled, "you may have a few letters from a pen pal and a sweater you stole, but you've probably never even kissed him?"

I laughed a little, "Yeah, we've kissed."

"Big deal!" Tucker yelled out. "I've kissed him French style. But he really wasn't that good."

The disclosure from Tucker caught me off guard. I hadn't expected anyone in the room to have actually known Owen that intimately, but they had and more than I had known.

"You're crazy, Tuck!" Lacey stated. "He is by far the best I have ever had, and I mean, had!" Lacey bragged then called over to me with a sinful grin on her face. "If he is really in love with you how many times have you gone all the way with him?"

I stopped smiling and didn't answer. Owen and I had never 'gone all the way', and know these girls were now bringing to my attention that Owen had never even suggested such an act.

Lacey continued to taunt me by rubbing her hands on her slender body in a sexually suggestive way. "Have you ever spent a hot sweaty night muttering the words 'Oh Owen, faster, Oh Owen that's just right!'"

Her friends giggled at the reenactment.

My heart began to pound hard in my chest. I felt my temperature rise and anger set into my emotions.

Tucker joined in. "Cause if you haven't, Lacey has. She and Owen 'went all the way' for a week straight once." The club members laughed at me as my face showed that I hadn't been loved by Owen in 'that' way.

Rita teased. "Oh look, you're going to make Charity cry because Owen doesn't love her as much as she thought he did."

I was humiliated and hurt that Owen had never told me of Lacey, or of any other girl for that matter. I struggled for a response hoping to end the discussion I had fueled. "I am sure that was a long time ago."

"Oh, do you really think that?" Lacey searched through her scrap book and pulled out a color picture of her in a long, white gown and a young man standing by her side as her date.

She shoved the picture in my direction and I stared at the evidence. My stomach turned and there was no doubt the young man in the picture was Owen. Feelings of betrayal made my heart pound harder in my chest. I wanted to wish away the possibility of the two of them together as nothing more than a photo from the past, but the date on the banner in the picture behind them was quite clear, Debutante Ball 1968.

Lacey noticed the horror on my face and she used the moment to further ridicule me, "Face it, Charity. Your relationship with him is nothing more than a figment of your imagination."

I demanded my dignity. "My name is Scout!"

"Your name ought to be liar," Tucker suggested with a hint of enjoyment in her voice.

I couldn't believe any of this was really happening. I didn't respond. There was no need to give these girls anything else to ridicule me with, but they were relentless.

"Your name is Charity because that is all you are," Lacey added to the amusement of her friends. "Besides, even if Owen had given you a second look we all know that boys will be boys and a fling with the housemaid is just a passing phase."

I fumed, "I am not a housemaid, and Owen and I are not a phase!" My words even seemed hollow to me as the image from the photo returned to the forefront of my memory.

"Oh really?" Lacey laughed. "I highly doubt a millionaire like Owen would date a girl like you."

In the back of my mind I heard Dally's voice egging me on the way he often did with other guys in the gang who were looking for a good reason to fight. 'Come on Sissy. What'cha gonna do. Sit there like and idiot and let her tell you your trash or are you going to rearrange her face and give her what she's got coming to her'.

I shook away his voice and stood up for myself, figuratively and physically. "A girl like me? What is that supposed to mean?"

"Owen would never stay with a girl like you when he could have so much better." Lacey motioned to herself and her friends.

"You better shut up!" I yelled in warning.

"Poor little Charity case. Face it, when you get back to Tulsa you will have nothing more than the barren dirt you grew up in. You're a worthless little girl!"

"Shut up!" I yelled louder and tears frustration flooded my eyes as I prepared for a confrontation I never wanted to have.

"You're worthless!" Lacey sneered back at me. "Your probably only here because your mama's a whore and your daddy's nothing more than a lousy drunk! Charity case!"

Everything in my vision turned red with fury as I heard the false accusations. Nobody talks about my family like that! I snapped and in a rage I lunged at Lacey.

She screamed in horror. Then she grabbed a handful of my hair and tried to scratch at my face. I began to throw a few random punches hoping to make contact and release my aggression. One punch hit her square in the nose and the blood began to drain as she screamed and cried.

The other girls in the room backed away, unwilling to step in and help their friend as she tried to fight me off. Only Tucker thought to do anything as she cried out like a tattle tail. "I'm going to get Miss Lemon!"

Tucker bolted out the door and I backed away from my roommate. My vision cleared long enough for me to see the blood on her white shirt and satin bedspread. My ears heard Tucker screaming in the hall for Miss Lemon to come quickly. I heard the rustle of commotion as the girls in their rooms started to flood into the hallway.

My instincts told me it was best if I skinned out of there. I backed away from my victim and gathered my shoes from the floor. I ran out the door and down the back stairwell, only pausing long enough on the stairs to slide my tennis shoes on, untied. I bolted out the back door and took off running in the first direction I saw.

Realization of what I had done hit me like a brick wall. I had screwed up again and there was no turning back. The judge would put me up for adoption, for sure. The way I saw it, I had nothing to lose, so I ran through the dark night across the common grounds past the English and Arts building. I made my plan on the go. I would head into the woods and hop the train to Tulsa. Once I was there I would lay low in my neighborhood until I was eighteen. Then I would be free and with my family. For a crazy moment, the plan made perfect sense to me.

I was only a few dozen yards from the edge of the woods when my peripheral vision caught a large dark figure running towards me. Frightened, I tried to will my feet to go faster because I couldn't afford to get caught, it wasn't in my plan.

I entered into the woods and strained to see the unleveled terrain that was covered in twigs, dead branches and decaying leaves. My only focus was what was in front of me, and then I was unexpectedly hit from the back. Wham! A strong figure tackled me to the ground. The two of us went down in a heap.

In fright, I threw my arms to and fro and kicked my legs to get free. The man on top of me dodged my limbs and called out. "Scout! Scout, knock it off. It's me, Jackson. I'm not going to hurt you. Just stop kicking me."

The sound of Jackson's voice was familiar so I ceased my struggle as my tears of began to flow. "Just let me go Jackson. Just let me go."

"What? Where do you think you are going at this time of night?" He asked as he st back from me and worked to catch his breath.

I couldn't stop bawling, but I managed to choke up a few words. "To the train."

"What train?" Jackson asked with a questioning face.

I gathered my composure a bit more and threw my hand out to point in the direction I had been heading. "The train that runs through these woods, and I don't care where it takes me. Just anywhere but here."

Jackson cracked a small smile as he realized I didn't have sufficient information to make a good choice about my escape from the academy. "Scout, you'll never get to that train from here. There's one hell of a briar patch in the way, not to mention the river."

"Well… I have to try!" I cried out.

Jackson frowned and threw his warm arm around my shoulder. "Why? What's going on?"

"For starters, I just punched Lacey McGovern in the face, and I drew a lot of blood."

Jackson laughed a little and tried to cheer me up. "Well, she's had that coming for a few years now. You'll probably be the school hero for that one." I didn't laugh, so he thought of something else to say in an effort to lighten my mood. "Things aren't really that bad, Scout. Listen, the worst they will probably do is call your parents."

"Well they can't," I sobbed, "cause their dead. They've been dead for over a year."

Jackson paused a moment stunned by the revelation. All along he had assumed my parents dumped me at Ashford the way the other parents had done to their daughters. He didn't know about my scholarship, or James, and it never crossed his mind to consider my parents weren't alive. Jackson's laughter faded from his voice. "So, who takes care of you?"

"My brother Darry did, but not now. I screwed that up too." I bawled some more and wiped my nose on my sleeve. "You know those bruises I came in with? They were from an boy who was… he… he tried to …" I shook the vision of James' cold green eyes staring at me with his hands wrapped around my neck from my mind. "Darry tried to stop him, but James stabbed him and now my brother is in a hospital room and I can't be with him because the judge ordered me to be here. The judge hates us, so he sent me here and my twin brother is in the Barrrington home for boys. He said if we screwed up he would separate us for good, and I am sure this will count as a screw up. I've ruined everything!" I cried out,

Jackson's caring eyes stared at me for a few seconds as he searched for something to say. "I'm sure you had a good reason to be mad at Lacey. The judge will understand."

Now it was my turn to laugh. "You think he will understand that I just found out my boyfriend might be two timing me with Lacey McGovern and think that is a good reason?"

Jackson's eyes widened at the news and he nodded in agreement with me. He gently rubbed the side of my arm with his hand. "Ouch, that is a tough one. But if you ask me, he's the loser here. For as much as I know about you, you are a pretty groovy girl."

I barely heard his words as I rambled on, "To make matters worse, because of the stupid homesick rules here I can't even call him and ask him if any of this is true. I can't even call home to see if Darry is doing well, or to talk to my brothers." I wept hard. "I just want to be home. If I can't go home I just wish I could hear their voices, you know?"

Jackson did know and he perked up as an idea entered his mind. "I think I can help you. If you promise to brush yourself off and quiet down I think I know of a way you can call home, and no one here needs to know." He stood up and took my hand. With a strong heave he pulled me to my feet and I stood close to him. Without permission he wrapped his arms around me and held me close to his chest and talked in a low calm voice to help quench my sorrows. "I knew the day I met you that there was more to you than met the eye. You're no ordinary Ashford girl."

I took in a few steady breaths and smelled his cologne again. I took note of how warm and comforting his arms felt around me. It was the kind of affection I hadn't experienced in weeks. It was the kind of affection I needed and had grown accustomed to with my brothers, our friends, and Owen.

Jackson knelt down and tied my shoes for me then he led me through the dark to the back entrance of the English and Arts building. He unlocked the door and I looked up at him in a panic. "We are going to get caught being in here."

"No we won't. We'll keep the lights off and no one will ever know we were in here."

I accepted the response and the two of us climbed the stairs to and empty office on the third floor. Jackson grabbed the phone off the desk and handed it too me. "You can call anyone you want and talk for as long as you want."

I took the heavy phone in my arms and sat on the floor so I couldn't be seen through the window. I looked up at him. "Are you sure?"

"Sure, I'm sure. Who is ever going to know it was you?" The young man walked out of the office to leave me with some privacy.

I picked up the receiver of the phone and dialed my home telephone number first. More than anyone, I wanted to talk to Sodapop.

Anticipation filled my body as the phone rang twice, three times. By the eighth and ninth ring I felt sorrow replace my excitement. I considered letting the phone ring all night long, but there was another call I had to make. I pushed down on the receiver buttons and let them up again. Once I heard the dial tone I wiped my eyes, took in a few deep breaths, and dialed the Jasper house.

On the third ring I heard the receiver come up from it's cradle and the familiar voice of Mrs. Jasper greeted me. "Good evening, Jasper residence." 

The sound of a voice from Tulsa made my throat tighten in sadness. When I heard Mrs. Jasper say hello a second time I knew I had to return the greeting. Weakly, I said, "hello, Mrs. Jasper. This is Scout Curtis. Is Owen able to come to the phone?"

"Oh, hello!" Her voice sang out, "just a minute darling and I will get him."

She often called me darling and the sound of the word made my hands begin to tremble. In the background, I heard the mother tell her son that Scout Curtis was on the phone. Owen picked up the receiver as fast as he could and anxiously asked,

"Hello?"

I couldn't respond.

"Scout is that you?"

The sound of his voice made me cry harder and I struggled to speak. "Owen?"

"Scout," his voice trembled a little with excitement, "I have missed you so much! I've tried to call you, but they said you can't receive phone calls or visitors until next week."

"Owen." Tears flooded my eyes and I had to catch my breath before I said anything else. "I need to ask you something."

"Are you okay? Scout, is something wrong?"

He had no idea how wrong things had gotten, but he should have and he was about to find out. "My roommate says she knows you. Do you know a girl named, Lacey McGovern?"

There was a seemingly guilty pause on the other side of the phone. Owen answered with apprehension. "Yes, I've met her."

I could barely handle the confirmation as I tried to hold back my sobs, but I couldn't hold back my desire for the truth. "Did you go all the way with her?"

My question was first answered with the same pause before Owen explained. "Scout, that was way before I ever met you. I love you Scout." Owen began to cry.

I cried harder. "If you loved me why were you at a dance with her this year?"

The pause this time was twice as long as the two before, and Owen could be heard on the other end sobbing. "Scout, I can explain."

The proof that Lacey wasn't lying stabbed me through the heart. I let my hand and the receiver collapse into my lap. Faintly, I could hear Owen crying and begging for me to listen to him, but my heart was crushed and it couldn't handle any more pain, so I reached over and put the receiver back into the cradle cutting off communication with my first true love. I sobbed out loud in pain filled gasps.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter Twenty One

**Chapter Twenty One**

I sat back against the wall, pulled my knees into my chest and cried out in pain. Between gasps I tried to figure out how I could have been so blind. How could Owen have taken me in his arms and told me that he loved me when I wasn't the only girl in his life? How could he have lied to me?

A warm hand firmly grabbed my shoulder. I didn't respond, but Jackson knew he didn't need my permission to come closer. I appreciated the comfort, but what I really needed was my family. Any one of my brothers would do.

"Do you want me to call anyone else for you?" Jackson said softly.

I hadn't fully heard his question because I was still thinking of Owen when I responded. "I don't understand. How could he have lied to me all this time? I never thought he was that kind of boy. How could any of this be true?"

Jackson let me cry a little longer then he leaned in and wrapped his arm around me. "Do you want to try to call your brother again?"

I nodded my head and pulled the phone closer to me. As I pulled the numbers on the phone I wished hard that Sodapop would be at home. I hoped he would have the perfect words for me, because he had been cheated on too. I finished dialing the number and Jackson and I listened to the phone ring and ring and ring. With each shrill bell my hope faded, time passed, and my tears dried.

After minutes of waiting, Jackson grabbed the receiver I had clutched in my fist. "I don't think he's home; is there anyone else you want to call?"

I shook my head no. I would have liked to call Ponyboy or the hospital or even Steve but couldn't remember the numbers. There was no one else to talk to.

Jackson placed the receiver back onto the cradle stood up to put the phone back on the desk exactly where he had found it. He looked down at me. "I'm really sorry about all of this. It just doesn't seem fair for you." He checked his watch and offered his hand to help me to my feet. "Even worse, I better get back to my job before people start looking for me. There's even a good chance they may be looking for me to send me out to look for you."

I wiped the last of the tears from my eyes, sniffled back my emotions and grabbed the young man's hand. He pulled me to my feet and into a hug. I hugged him back tightly then let him loose. Quietly, I spoke, "Thanks."

"No problem." Jackson grabbed my shoulder and led me out into the dark hallway and down the steps. "I just wish there was something else I could do."

I whimpered, "You've already done more than you have had to."

Jackson took a chance at some lighthearted humor. "I've always been a sucker for a damsel in distress." I smiled and Jackson stopped at the back door. Slowly, he opened it and peeked outside. The night had grown dark and no one was around. He said, "You head out the back door. I'm going to wait a few minutes and then leave out the front door."

I nodded my head and looked back at the maintenance man. "Thank you for letting me cry on your shoulder." He smiled back and I ran out the door and down the stone steps in an effort not to be seen leaving the building.

I walked across the deserted campus. I knew that my fate back at Covington House had been determined without me since I hadn't been there to defend myself. I succumbed to the fact that it was time to move on and face the music.

As I walked along the street lantern lit sidewalk back to my House I tortured myself with thoughts about my phone call with Owen. His words were so unexpected. I was so sure that Lacey was nothing more than a liar. Thinking about the betrayal made my throat tighten in pain, but I stopped myself from bawling again. I told myself I was done crying for the night and it was time to be tuff. I tried to convince myself that losing Owen wasn't the end of the world. I had lost more important people than him and still carried on, so I knew that after time my wounds would heal.

It was late when I discovered that the front door to Covington House was locked. I had no choice but to ring the bell and begin my punishment. I heard the door buzzer announce that I had arrived and Mr. Donaldsen opened the door. I peeked up at him, he glared at me, and I knew that things were going to be bad. Sighing heavy, I lowered my head and walked into the foyer.

"Pray tell, child!" Miss Lemon jumped from the davenport and ranted, "Where in God's green earth have you been? You are in a world of trouble young lady. Whatever were you thinking? Striking another girl is simply inexcusable behavior. What would inspire you to do such a thing?"

My eyes were still red and swollen from of crying as I mumbled back with an unexpected arrogance, "That's how we handle things on my side of Tulsa."

Miss Lemon's face froze and she grew silent. She remembered her comment to me and for a moment she felt a tinge of responsibility.

Mr. Donaldsen called out to me. "Miss Curtis, where you came from is no excuse. Your behavior tonight is simply intolerable, and will not go by unpunished."

"Yes, Sir" I said softly. I never expected to avoid reprimand.

"First of all, you and Miss McGovern will learn to get along," Mr. Donaldsen demanded, "because both of you will remain as roommates and both of you will be spending the next two weeks together on evening kitchen duty. Is that understood?"

"Yes, sir."

The Dean continued, "We spoke to the other girls and we know of the harsh words that Lacey said to you. Treatment like that of another student is completely cruel and uncalled for. For that we are sorry. She has been a student here for a long time and she should know better."

"Yes, Sir" I struggled to keep a tiny grin from appearing on my face. I loved the fact that Lacey's instigative behavior did not go unnoticed. Neither did my grin.

"I don't know what you find funny about this." Mr. Donaldsen scolded me, "I am not finished with your consequences. For your inexcusable and violent behavior you will be placed on room confinement until Monday morning and your visitor and phone privileges have been revoked for two additional weeks."

"What? Two weeks?" I yelled out, "you can't do that! You know my situation. You know I haven't talked to any of my brother in the hospital for almost a month!"

"Young lady, lower your voice." Miss Lemon reprimanded me.

"Miss Curtis," Mr. Donaldsen began, "regardless of what you think, I did consider your situation. That is why we did not have you expelled, as we would have if you were a traditional Ashford girl. Furthermore, as a favor to you and your situation we have decided not to alert anyone in Tulsa of this incident. You should also know that Lacey McGovern's father is the President of the Board of Directors here at Ashford Academy. He handpicked you for the academy's first scholarship and he handpicked you to room with his daughter. He understands that she can be harsh and he forgives you for what you have done, but he won't be as forgiving if it happens again, and neither will I. Understood?"

I nodded and felt ashamed for my snicker.

"Very well," Mr. Donaldsen said, "you will probably be happy to hear that Miss McGovern will be spending a few nights in the infirmary, so you will have your room to yourself. I suggest you spend your time alone time to make some personal changes to help you get along better with Lacey and the other girls in this House."

"Yes, Sir." I replied.

Mr. Donaldsen looked to Miss Lemon. "I have nothing further. Why don't you see Miss Curtis to her room for the night and I will see myself out."

Miss Lemon smiled politely. "Thank you for coming to tend to this incident. Enjoy what is left of your night."

Miss Lemon motioned for me to follow her up the stairs. On our way up she looked me over and noted, "You are filthy. Grab your bathing supplies and wash up before bed."

We reached the hallway on the third floor. Purposely, I kept my head and vision low so I didn't make eye contact with any of the girls on my floor who were in their rooms with their doors wide open.

I did as the housemother directed and after my shower she saw me to my room and instructed me that I was not to leave the room or to allow any other girl inside.

"Yes Ma'am," I answered as I walked into my room.

Miss Lemon stopped in the doorway. "I certainly hope you realize that Ashford girls carry themselves with poise and self restraint. Anything less is simply unacceptable." The woman didn't wait for my response as she pulled my door shut tight.

I stared at the empty room and was thankful I wouldn't have to see my roommate again for the night. I definitely needed some time to cool off. I crossed the room and notice the picture of her and Owen at the dance was laying face up on her bed. I fought the urge to shred the photo into tiny pieces, but I knew better than that and this time I was going to listen to reason.

To get the two of them off my mind I walked over to a large wall mirror of Lacey's and looked at my reflection. I thought hard about Mr. Donaldsen's directions to make changes to help me deal with Ashford girls. I knew the best way to do that was to stay as far away from them as I could then one solution formed in my mind.

Looking around the room my eyes stopped on a wooden box lying on the top of Lacey's desk. I eyed the large silver scissors resting just under a wooden ruler. I walked over and picked up the cold steel utensil. The sharp blades shimmered in the light.

I walked to my bathing supplies basket and grabbed my hairbrush. I ran the bristles through my long wet hair so it hung as straight as possible. I stepped over to the mirror and looked at my long hair one last time. No doubt it was time for a change.

I locked my fingers into the shears and opened the blades. I raised the sharp edges as high as my jaw line and held the wet hair inside. I looked into the mirror and stared back at myself. My eyes dared my fingers to do the deed. I hesitated, and then squeezed my fingers together. I could hear the zip of the blades cutting through hundreds of strands of hair. The long severed ends fell across my shoulder and onto the floor. There was no turning back - I was committed.

When I finished chopping off the majority of my hair I put Lacey's shears back into her wooden box where they were found. I grabbed my brush and pulled it through my damp strands of hair. Gone was the need for long brush strokes. I finished the chore in half the time it took me before. That was exactly the change I wanted. Being able to get ready in the morning in half the time meant less time with Covington House girls.

I took a minute to stare at my image in the mirror. The new short haircut accentuated my blue eyes and revealed the sculptured features of my face making me look more like Sodapop than anyone else in the family. I didn't think I looked anything like my old self, but I liked it. I liked the thought of a new start.

I cleaned up the floor and tossed the loose hair into the garbage can. Then I turn off the light and slipped into the covers on my bed. I stared up at the ceiling and the evening's events flooded back into my mind. I thought about how wonderful it would have been to have the opportunity to talk to Sodapop, but no matter when I called he wasn't home. I wished I had Ponyboy's phone number with me. I would definitely have called him at Barrington. I missed him so much my heart began to ache just thinking about him. Then Owen entered my mind. I couldn't believe how absolutely perfect the two of us had seemed together. Everyone in the family loved him. I loved him and that was what hurt the most. Even though I didn't want to, I cried myself to sleep that night.

In the morning I woke to a knocking on my door. Miss Lemon walked in before I could mutter a word. I remained on my bed and watched her walk towards me with a plate of food in her hand, fully expecting her reprimand from the night before to continue, but the morning seemed to have brought a new sunshine to her demeanor.

"All the other girls have gone to breakfast. It's time for you to rise and shine like I know you can."

I sat up in bed and watched the white of her eyes widen in surprise. "Child! What have you done to your beautiful hair?"

"I cut it," I said simply.

Miss Lemon looked around the room for something then back to me. "But why?"

"Because I wanted to make a change."

"Well, you certainly did." Miss Lemon said, still in awe over the idea of a girl cutting her hair without the services of a beautician. Miss Lemon then sat down on my bed and handed me a plate full of scrambled eggs and sausage.

Reluctantly, I took the plate. "Thank you, but I am not hungry."

Softly she responded, "I didn't bring that plate to cure your hunger. I brought it to help you keep your strength."

I looked at the plate and then back to my housemother. "Really, I am not hungry."

Miss Lemon looked at me with a soft smile I had not seen on her face in the past. "Scout, you're not the first Covington House girl to have her heart broken by a careless young man. I've helped to mend many hearts in the past decades and the first step in making it all better is a good breakfast."

The woman's attention to my needs brought a tiny smile to my face. I lifted the fork, but could not bring myself to eat.

Miss Lemon took notice, "Scout, I am not leaving this room until you have finished that plate of food." Then she nodded toward my breakfast.

I looked at the scrambled eggs and thought back to my stubbornness with Darry and Soda when Ponyboy had fled to Windrixville. I had gone days refusing to eat, but it didn't help the pain I felt. Maybe Miss Lemon was right. I lifted a fork full of eggs off of my plate and into my mouth.

Miss Lemon smiled and reached out and put her hand on my knee. "Scout, I must apologize to you for my inconsiderate behavior. It was wrong of me to make assumptions about you because of where you were raised. For my mistake, I am so sorry."

I heard the apology and nearly choked on my second bite of eggs. The apology was so unexpected that I didn't know what to say.

Miss Lemon continued. "My dear, the truth is Miss McGovern has been a thorn in my paw now for quite sometime. And maybe deep down I was hoping you'd do exactly what you did. That was wrong for me to do to Lacey and wrong for me to do to you. Can you forgive me?

"Yes Ma'am." I said quickly without thought.

"Thank you." The lady smiled with relief. There was a long pause between us before she spoke again. "I want you to know that even after hearing about what Lacey said to you Mr. Donaldsen and I did not divulge any of the truth about your parents or your situation. We feel that is for you to share when you are ready."

I nodded my head to let her know I had heard her and I took another bite of my breakfast to avoid having to speak.

Miss Lemon looked at me approving of my choice to finish my food. "I'll leave you to your breakfast. I will return in a while for your dishes." The lady rose to her feet and took a few steps towards the door before turning back to me. "I do hope you plan to tell the girls here a little more about yourself. I think it would really help you to make a few friends. Will you give it some consideration?"

I looked up at the lady. "Sure, I'll consider it."

She smiled with pleasure. "Good. Remember, no one in your room today and no one out. I will come and get you for restroom breaks and meal. Understood?"

I nodded. "Understood."

Once she was gone a set my breakfast plate down on my desk and picked up a pen and paper. Miss Lemon may have wanted me to put this behind me, but what I planned to do was put it down on paper. I had to tell someone of my misery so I started a letter to the only person I could share the truth with.

Dear Ponyboy,

I fear I have ruined everything…


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty Two

**Chapter Twenty Two**

In the morning I bundled up all of Owen's letters, his letterman's sweater and the pictures he had sent me and I put them in the Buster Brown shoebox. I promptly stashed the box on a shelf in my closet in hopes that it would help to dull the pain of the betrayal I felt. It would also keep the past away from my roommate who was sure to continue to torture me when she returned this afternoon from the infirmary.

I grabbed a barrette, combed my hair over to one side and pinned my long bangs up on the opposite side of my part. Ready to go, I grabbed my books, my letter to Ponyboy, and headed out into the hallway where I was met with the familiar faces of girls whose names I hadn't bothered to learn.

I could feel their stares and hear their dull whispers as I passed. I was hoping the hushed conversations were more about my new look than the incident with my roommate.

"Hey you!" One gal called out to me with a grin. "I heard you socked Lacey a good one Saturday night." I didn't want any trouble, so I ignored her and kept walking. She was joined by a few of her friends and they blocked the hallway as she asked excitedly, "Is it true?"

"Yeah," one of her friends asked, "did you really punch her in the face? Because if you did, she's had it coming for a long time."

I gently pushed my way through the collection of girls and continued on my way without comment. The first gal called out to me as I reached the top of the stairs. "So is it true?"

I didn't answer her, but I could hear other girls in the hallway assuring her the story was true and giggling in delight. I walked out the front door of the house and was headed to the main building for breakfast when I heard another girl call my name. I glanced behind me to see Maria Kinsley trotting towards me with a few of her friends in tow.

"Wait up, Scout!" She said as she jogged up to me. "Wow! I barely knew it was you with your hair that short. Did they make you cut it as punishment?"

"No," I said and wondered if they could have done that. "I cut it on my own."

"It looks nice!" Maria said genuinely as she walked with me. "Listen, I'd probably lose a gold star for telling you this, but most of the girls at Covington House are pretty jazzed that you put Lacey in her place last night. We all think she's had that coming for a long time now. It's just that none of us had the guts to do it, 'til you came along, anyway."

I looked at Maria and could tell by her smile that she was genuinely excited to hear about the confrontation. I smiled back. "Well, I don't think Miss Lemon is going to give me a gold star for it."

"No," Maria said, "but you stood up for yourself and that is what really matters."

"Maybe." I said softly as the wind blew against my bare neck.

For a moment there was an awkward silence between all of us, but then Maria spoke up, "Listen, I know I haven't been very hospitable since you've been here, but do you want to sit with us at breakfast?"

I looked ahead of myself and thought about how wonderful it would be to have someone to sit with. I was sure having a few friends would keep Lacey and her cronies off my back, but my stubborn defenses prevailed. "Thanks, but I've got a lot on my mind, so I'll probably sit by myself."

Judging by the look on Maria's face she was a relatively popular girl and she hadn't had her invitations turned down too often. She spoke with a slight confusion. "Okay… well, if you ever want to join us you are more than welcome too.

"Thanks." I said simply and I walked away to mulishly be by myself.

I chose to sit by myself at breakfast, but I wasn't alone. Apparently, Lacey rubs a lot of people the wrong way at Ashford and a lot of the girls went out of their way to tell me how happy they were to hear Lacey had received her just rewards. I stayed modest in accepting the praise, but it did feel good.

I left breakfast early to be sure I put the letter to Ponyboy in the mailbox before the postman arrived. It felt good to be back in class and have something to think about other than Owen. By the evening, when Lacey arrived back to the room with a black eye, things seemed to be going a little more my way. That all changed just before dinner when the pay phone rang in the hall outside my dorm room.

I was working on my trigonometry homework when I heard someone knock on our door and say, "Lacey, there is an Owen Jasper on the phone for you."

My heart jumped at hearing the name. I looked over at my roommate and noticed the genuine surprise on her slightly bruised face. Then she looked to me and grinned like a Cheshire Cat. She gloatingly jumped off her bed and sauntered out to the pay phone.

My sorrows quickly built up inside of me, and I threw my pencil down in anger. What nerve he had calling her so quickly. I couldn't believe Owen would be so cold hearted, but then I started to wonder if it wasn't the first time he had called. Maybe he had been calling her all the time and I just hadn't ever noticed. Wanting answers I ran to the doorway to listen in on the conversation.

"Oh no, Owen, it's no bother…Owen, you devil, you know that would be against the rules…" Lacey chuckled softly before she continued the conversation. "I have our picture from the dance, it's up on my mirror now…" Then she laughed hard as if something Owen had said was irresistibly funny. "Oh no, Owen, I couldn't….Owen? … Okay, bye-bye. I love you too."

Fuming mad, I headed back to my bed before Lacey could discover that I had eavesdropped. She wandered back into our room with an odd grin on her face. At first she looked troubled by the conversation, but then she caught me peeking at her for more information. She sat down on the edge of her bed and flashed and evil grin. "Hmm, I thought you said you and Owen were in love. If that were true I wonder why he would have called me?"

I looked away from the girl and attempted to act as if I didn't care that he had called her. I muttered, "I must have been mistaken."

Lacey looked at me perplexed. "Your story changed pretty fast. See, I knew you were lying this whole time. Charity case."

"You caught me." I said and slammed my textbook shut. I slipped on my saddle shoes and headed out the door in my school uniform.

I almost ran into Tucker as she came shrieking through our doorway. "Oh my gosh! Did I just hear that Owen Jasper called you?"

"Uh huh!" I heard Lacey respond with enthusiasm as Tucker screeched with delight.

I slammed the door on my way out and pouted on my walk to the library. I couldn't believe what had transpired. How could I have been so blind? All I wanted to do was sob, so I went in search of isolation.

I headed to the third floor of the library in misery. Most of the time my tears fell quietly till a storm of painful emotions flooded me as I realized all of the tender moments with Owen were nothing more than a farce. Being the fool in love was painful. More than ever, I wanted to talk to Sodapop. I wanted to apologize to him for not being more supportive when Sandy broke his heart. I wasn't there for him because I didn't truly understand his pain, but now I knew. Now I could relate with the pain of being played the fool with all of my future plans centered around someone who didn't truly love me. Alone on the third floor I kept a look out to see of Jackson would come looking for me. I needed a shoulder to cry on. I needed to call home, but I got neither.

Distraught, I skipped dinner and sat alone outside the library, but by the time the sun began to set I headed back to the kitchen for my evening punishment of kitchen duty with Lacey. I left the library and headed to the main building. The wind picked up and I pulled my uniform jacket together and buttoned it shut and thought about my family. I had to find a way to get to them. Four weeks away from them was too long, and with my new penalty six weeks felt like it would be an eternity!

In the kitchen I tried to avoid my roommate by staying on the opposite side of the kitchen, but by the time we had to start washing dishes there was no avoiding her and her incessant rambling about how wonderful Owen was and how sweet it was to receive a phone call from him.

I boiled with anger that night, but it grew worse. Owen called on Tuesday night and Wednesday night and by Thursday my agitations transformed into a nightmare.

I was sitting on the edge of my bed reading my latest letter from Ponyboy.

_Dear Scout,_

_I just finished reading your letter. The gang would sure be proud of you that you skinned that girl real good. It sounds like she had it coming too. I have been wondering what she could have said to you to make you that mad. It must have been horrible. That's too bad you got in trouble for all of it. Kitchen duty sounds like it will be miserable, especially since your roommate will be there too. I was unhappy to read that your privileges were revoked for another two weeks. I really want to hear your voice again. I've talked to Soda and Two-Bit and Steve and Darry. Heck, I have even talked to Casey, but it's you I want to talk to the most. I was wondering, if you don't plan on telling Sodapop and Darry what happened how are you going to explain that they can't come see you or call you yet? _

_I've been dreaming about running away from here and coming to see you. I'm sure I could hitchhike my way there if Barrington would give me the weekend to do what I want. I'd love to give you a big hug and tell you that everything will be all right. I know deep down you know it will. Think of all we've been through and we are still doing pretty okay. _

_I am really sorry to hear about Owen. I don't really know what to say other than he doesn't know what he's giving up. Honestly, I never thought Owen would be the two timing type. Since I've never been in love like you and Soda I can't say much to make you feel better. I know you want Darry and Soda to think everything there is a bed of roses, but you should tell Soda about Owen. He'd know what to say to you._

_I really don't understand the Owen situation. I've been thinking about getting his phone number from Soda and giving him a call. I'd sure like the opportunity to give him a piece of my mind. You know that when the gang hears about this they will probably work him over real good. He's probably lucky Dally aint alive no more or he'd really get what was coming to him!_

_I heard that Darry is up and walking around the hospital. Two-Bit told me that we would barely recognize him if we saw him. He's real skinny, pale, and weak. I was trying to decide whether to tell you this or not, but I might get to go home and visit in a weekend or two. One to the teachers here has a grandma who lives in Tulsa and he goes back to see her. He said next time he goes back he will see if I can hitch a ride with him. Now I get excited every time I see the teacher, and each time he sees me he says, "I aint going this weekend," but one of these times he's going to tell me to pack my bag. I'll be ready when he does. _

_I miss you a ton and I love you more than that! So you stay out of trouble so I can call you in twelve days! I'm counting them down. I bunch of the guys here know I can't wait to talk to you and they have all given me a dime so we can talk an extra long time. I didn't tell them I had plenty of money from Mr. Ottavi, I just take their dimes. _

_I have to get my schoolwork done. You be good and don't worry about Owen, someone better is sure to come along. _

_Love and miss you, _

_Ponyboy_

Tears were welling up in my eyes when I heard the weekly holler of the visitor passes. Every Thursday night the visitor cards are handed out. This is when the girls learn if their family or friends are coming to Ashford to visit them or if they are approved for a weekend pass to somewhere with someone. Every week I knew I wouldn't be getting a visitor card, but every week I listened and a little voice inside my head would convince me that maybe there would be a mix up and someone I knew would be allowed to visit. Every week I was disappointed, but never as disappointed as this day.

All of the girls gathered in the hallway to listen for the visitor announcements made my Rachel Burns, vice president of the Covington House Committee. I didn't pay much attention to all of the announcements, but one struck me hard.

"Lacey McGovern, you have a visitor coming this weekend," Rachel Burns voice yelled out and handed the little cardboard card to Lacey. "Owen Jasper!"

A couple of the girls ooo-ed and ahh-ed like elementary school girls. Lacey trotted towards Rachel and snatched up the card, she read the name once to confirm it was really announcing that Owen was coming to see her. Then she sauntered back to our room and flaunted the card in my face. "Did you read this? It says I will someday be Mrs. Owen Jasper."

I read the card and it clearly said, Owen Jasper. My stomach turned ill and I muttered a pleasantry so she wouldn't see my jealous side. "Congratulations."

Then Lacey's gaggle of friends barreled into our room to drool over the card and the impending visitor.

Depressed, I slipped on my shoes and slipped out of our room unnoticed. I headed down the back stairwell and outside to get some fresh air. In the distance I noticed the lights were on in the English and Arts building. I needed a friend, so I took a chance one would be there. I took off in search of Jackson and his comforting eyes, strong shoulders and sweet smelling cologne.

Hot tears of frustration welled up in my eyes as I headed across the campus in search of the only Ashford area friend I had. I looked around to see if I was alone then I ran up the back steps, two at a time. Cautiously, I opened the door and slipped inside the semi-lit building. I let the door close behind me. When I couldn't hear where Jackson was working I set off down the hallway peeking my head into the vacant offices and classrooms. My search on the first floor came up unsuccessful, so I moved up the steps to the second floor where many rooms emitted light from the open doorways. I walked down the hallway and looked into a few empty, illuminated rooms and found no one inside. Then I found a classroom and stuck my head in hoping to find my friend, but he wasn't the man behind the desk. My eyes met with the man's eyes then I tried to back away unnoticed.

"Miss Curtis?" My advanced literature teacher called out to me. He was a younger man, probably in his late twenties. He was tall and slender with a head full of thick, black wavy hair that needed to be cut. I had heard other girls talking about how he had graduated from an ivy league school out east, but his accent was more mid-American.

Knowing there was no escape I hurriedly wiped my eyes and stepped back into the classroom. "Mr. Fredricks, how are you?" I said simply.

"I'm good. Miss Curtis, it's interesting to see you here tonight. Why don't you come on in here? I have been meaning to speak to you about something."

I slowly walked into the classroom and sat at one of the wooden tables at the head of the class. Mr. Fredricks came around to the front of his desk and looked down at me. "What brings you back to the classroom tonight?"

"I thought I dropped one of my pencils earlier and I was just checking to see if it was here." I lied and I felt my face grow flush with embarrassment. Then I looked to the floor to search for the non-existent pencil

"That's what I like about you! You understand the true value and meaning of things in life." Mr. Fredricks preached and nodded his head, but didn't seem to care about my pencil lie. "Scout, I recently graded your paper on The Grapes of Wrath and had no choice but to give you another A+."

I smiled at the result. "Thank you."

"Of all the students in my class, you are the only one with all 'A' plusses. I thought that was outstanding until I spoke with your other teachers and found out that not one of them has given you a grade lower than an A+ since you have arrived. Then I realized that's not just outstanding, it's phenomenal!"

I smiled again. "Thank you, Sir."

"Achievements like this shouldn't go unnoticed so last week I went to your file to contact your parents so I could let them know how well you were doing, but their names and number weren't listed. In fact, nothing was listed other than your records from Tulsa High School."

Uncomfortably, I shifted my weight in my seat and began to avoid eye contact with my teacher.

Mr. Fredricks looked at me with concern. "I have a friend who lives in Tulsa and works as a reporter. So I gave him a call and asked about you. I was pretty surprised to hear that your name rang a bell to him. Then he told me that there had been a few newspaper articles about you in the past year."

Mr. Fredricks paused to give me a moment to take up the conversation, but I didn't speak. Seeing this barrier to the conversation my teacher reached behind himself, picked up a thick white envelope, and carried on. "He looked those articles up for me and sent them." The man took the newspaper clippings out of the envelope, unfolded them and presented them to me.

On top of the pile was the story about the 'Juvenile Delinquents Turn Heroes'. My stomach turned sour at the knowledge that my past had followed me to the academy. I looked at the four pictures on the front of the newspaper of Johnny, Dallas, Ponyboy, and myself. I missed my friends.

"I read those articles and they are amazing stories of bravery and very sad at the same time," Mr. Fredricks said solemnly.

I flipped through the stack of articles. There was one about the trial of Duke Dobbins. One about the Winter Formal with photos of Owen and me entering the dance and being crowned king and queen. I stared at the happy photos and felt sadness rush into my heart, so I flipped to the next article, which was one I hadn't seen before. The headline read, 'Girl Attacked, Brother Stabbed'. Ignoring my teacher I began to read the article.

_Seventeen-year-old James Young is on the run from the law following an incident where he attacked a young girl and stabbed her brother as he attempted to save her from the assault. _

_Darrell Curtis Jr. suffered life threatening injuries when…_

"I've been thinking." Mr. Fredricks interrupted my reading. "As editor of the school paper I believe your story of perseverance is one that should be told here in the Ashford Academy Journal. I plan to assign a few girls from my journalism class to read these article and prepare and interview with you. I want them to write a story about you and your triumphs and tragedies in the school newspaper for next month's issue. I think your story is one that Ashford has never seen."

I smiled with nervous apprehension. "Sir, I don't think that would be a good idea."

"You're wrong!" Mr. Fredricks leaned towards me slightly to make his point. "I have only been teaching her for a few years, but right away I noticed that the girls in this school are disconnected from the harsh realities of the world. They have been sheltered from America's truths for years. Now it's up to you to tell them about the struggles of being poor and surviving on your own. Maybe then they can relate and begin to understand what the world is like for the majority and not the minority?"

"I don't think I am the type of girl Ashford is looking to showcase on the front page."

"If you ask me Ashford Academy needs more girls like you. You should be an inspiration to your peers."

My eyes widened at his reference. I had never been referred to as an inspiration and I wasn't sure I was comfortable in that role here at Ashford. I knew that I didn't agree with my teacher. I couldn't see how talking about my suffering could help social snobs like Lacey or Tucker. In my mind talking about my past would only ostracize me further from the social elite at the school.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Fredricks, but I don't think I would be comfortable being big news here at Ashford." I stood up to leave. "To be honest a lot has changed in my life since those articles were written."

"That's exactly why I need you to cooperate with my reporters. Otherwise, what you have to say won't be in the article when it goes to print."

"I'm not interesting in an article being written about me. I really don't want to be front page news again."

Mr. Fredricks seemed agitated that I had put a snag in his plan to change the social landscape at the academy. Seeing I wasn't going to cooperate, he hurriedly snatched up his copies of the newspaper articles. "I hope in the coming days you will reconsider your willingness to be a part of the article, but you need to remember as the faculty advisor of the newspaper I make the final decisions. You may not like that you are the pioneer here, but you are and the story will be told. Have a nice evening, Miss Curtis."

I didn't know what shocked me more, that he dismissed me without further discussion or that he planned to feature my life in an article whether I liked it or not. Feeling dejected, I silently turned and walked out of the classroom. I had almost forgotten the original problem that brought me to the building to begin with when I walked right into a man in the hallway.

"Whoa there!" He said and flashed a friendly smile.

"Sorry." I looked up at the man and was relieved to see Jackson standing before me. "Jackson! Where have you been? I've been looking all over for you for days!" I scolded.

Jackson looked at me amused by the attention I wanted from him, but clueless to the torment I had been through. "I've been working. What happened to your hair?"

"I cut it, but don't mind that." My eyes grew red.

"What's the matter?"

"Jackson, everything is falling apart." I said with a whimper then I began to fall apart.

Jackson's amusement waned as he realized I was upset. "Come on," he said and pulled me to the steps where we climbed to the fifth floor. None of the rooms on the top floor of the building were used. Most of the furniture was gathered in the rooms in piles covered by white sheets to keep the dust off of them. Jackson pulled me into a small, vacant office with a dormer window that had a view of Covington House. He shut the door for privacy and we sat together on a covered sofa.

"What is the matter?" He asked again.

I looked up at the young man and cried out. "Owen is coming to Ashford this Saturday to visit Lacey McGovern."

Jackson's mouth dropped open in surprise. Knowing there were no words to say he simply put his arms around me and pressed my head against his shoulder so I had some comfort for my sorrows.


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter Twenty Three

**Chapter Twenty Three**

My consciousness awakened and I felt a man's hand press hard against my mouth. All I could think about was James. I tried to scream, but nothing came out except my breath through my nose. My eyes snapped open to find Jackson standing over top of me. His hand was over my mouth and the second one raised a finger to his smiling lips. "Shhhh," he said. I nodded my head a little and he took his hand off of my mouth and whispered. "Let's go fishing."

I sat up and looked over at my sleeping roommate in her satin eye mask. I turned back to Jackson and whispered, "How did you get in here?"

He whispered back, "Silly girl, I've got a key."

I cocked my head in disbelief. "You're going to get fired if you get caught!"

"I won't get caught," Jackson whispered with confidence, "now get dressed and I'll meet you outside by the back door." I nodded my head again and the boy left my room. Hurriedly, I slipped on a pair of blue jean Capri pants, a sweater set and my regulation Ashford Academy saddle shoes. I combed my hair and put some toothpaste in my mouth. Quietly, I tip toed out of the room and scampered down the back staircase and met Jackson at the rear of Covington House.

"Come on," he said and grabbed my hand. Without reservation, I ran hand in hand with the boy across the yard and into a grove of trees that lined the school property where our pace slowed to a walk. He looked down at me happy I had agreed to come along. "I'll put the worm on the hook if you need me too."

I thought about the purpose of our rendezvous and asked, "Jackson, why are you taking me fishing?"

He looked at me with a crooked grin. "I knew that Owen coming to see Lacey today, so I wanted to be sure you had something else to do to keep your mind off of it all."

I smiled back at the boy as the sun began to rise over the edge of the trees. "That's very thoughtful of you, but I'm pretty sure it's against school rules to go running off into the woods to go fishing."

"Since when do you care about school rules?" Jackson asked with humor in his voice. "Besides, Saturday is visitation day, and most of the girls run wild around here all day so no one will really know where you've gone."

"That could be true." I grinned and nodded my head.

"I've got the truck parked along the driveway." Jackson pointed me through the thicket.

The two of us weaved through the trees to the road where the truck was waiting. Jackson opened the passenger door and I climbed in. I thought about how all night I had agonized about what I would say when I saw Owen with his arms wrapped around my roommate, but my worries were for nothing. Jackson had a much better plan. Once he was in the truck I thanked him for being so thoughtful.

"No problem, I've tried to imagine how hard things have been for you over the past month, so I wasn't about to have you suffer through another heartbreak. I still can't believe any guy would choose Lacey over you."

I blushed. "Well, you didn't, and being with you today will be a big help. I really appreciate it."

"Anything for a friend." Jackson looked towards me and winked.

I smiled as we pulled off of Ashford property and onto the highway. It was the first time I had been away from the school grounds in a month. The simple freedom felt exhilarating, and I rolled the window down and let the warm breeze race across my face as I imagined how great it would be to never go back.

Jackson turned down a narrow dirt road and pulled up to a clearing in the field that ran behind the academy. I asked, "Is this the river that runs between the school and the railroad tracks?"

"Yeah." Jackson said simply.

"What time does the train come through?" I asked and climbed out of the pick up truck.

Jackson looked at me with an adorable grin. "No way! We came here to go fishing, and you're gonna fish! I will not be held responsible for aiding and abetting an Ashford Academy fugitive!"

With no concern for her missing roommate Lacey finished primping her hair. She ran her slender hands across her red fitted dress to assure there were no wrinkles, and then she grabbed the Visitor Announcement card from her nightstand. She read the name one last time, Owen Jasper. She felt a tingle of excitement rush through her body as she headed out of her dorm room.

Quickly she walked across the common grounds in her red shoes and entered the main building. She eagerly waltzed into the Great Room in search of her suitor. She looked around the room through the crowd of happy people and found Owen sitting alone on a wooden bench holding a large bouquet of fresh flowers. For a moment she marveled at his male beauty. He had arrived dressed appropriately for a visit to Ashford, in dress slacks, a tie and a suit coat. As she walked towards him she was sure the light blue dress shirt he was wearing was the perfect compliment to his eyes.

Owen looked up and noticed the beautiful girl coming towards him. His once content face tensed with anger as he saw her. He stood up and marched towards her. The livid glare in his eyes defeated her near perfect smile.

"Owen!" The girl cheerfully greeted him. "It's so good to see you again."

Owen's eyes were filled with anger as he grabbed the debutants upper arm tightly and physically directed her into the hallway for privacy.

Clueless, Lacey clip clopped in her high heeled shoes and playfully questioned her visitor. "Are you mad? You seem mad. Is something bothering you?"

Owen pushed her into a corner in the nearly vacant hallway. Infuriated with her he growled low and pointed a stern finger into her chest. "Why did you tell Scout about the dance? Why did you tell her we were an item when we aren't?"

Lacey smiled back at the boy, attempting to exercise her charm. "Now Owen, you simply can not continue to deny the passion between the two of us."

Owen scolded her in a whisper, "There is nothing between us. There never was and there never will be! I love Scout and I've come her to tell her that."

Seductively, Lacey asked, "Owen, you could have any girl you want. What could you possibly want with an charity case like her?"

Owen's muscles tensed and he had to use restraint to control his temper. "Just shut up, Lacey! Don't you ever refer to her like that again! Scout Curtis has more poise and class than you, or gold digging girls like you will ever have."

"Owen…" Lacey reached her hand up to caress his face.

He grabbed it so she couldn't touch him. "No Lacey! You are not going to ruin this. I love Scout. I am going to fix this, and you are going to help me."

Lacey defiantly threw her hands onto her hips. "No, I won't!"

"Oh yes you will, or this postcard is going in the mail for anyone to see!" Owen reached into his pocket and held up a postcard for Lacey to read.

_Mr. McGovern,_

_I am writing to tell you that I have learned first hand that your daughter has failed to uphold the celibate expectations of her trust fund. Please contact me to learn further details._

_Owen Jasper_

"You wouldn't?" Lacey slammed her foot down in disgust.

"Try me!" Owen challenged with an evil glare.

"He'll never believe you," Lacey hissed back at him.

"You think so? I'm like the son he wished he'd had." Owen said with a grin.

"Why would you do such a thing?"

"The way I see it, you ruined things for me with Scout, so I'll ruin things for you."

It was no secret amongst the upper social elites that Lacey stood to receive a sizable fortune from her trust fund if she remained a virgin until marriage. Owen put the stamped postcard safely away into the inside pocket of his sport coat. "Now, we are going to Covington House and you are going to go upstairs to your dorm room and bring Scout out."

"I can't. She's not there."

Not believing her, Owen pulled her out of the corner and down the hall to the exit door. "You are going to go in and get her, or this postcard is going in the mail today."

"Owen, I am not lying to you. I woke up this morning and she was gone. I have no way of knowing where she could be!"

"Well, for your sake, you better find her," Owen warned.

Jackson cast his fishing line into the water and turned to me. "How was your day yesterday."

"Long," I said without explanation as I fiddled with the hook and the worm.

"Because you were thinking about Owen?" The young man fished around for information.

I looked over at Jackson, who was standing a dozen feet away. "From time to time, but mostly it was just exhausting telling the attorneys the same thing over and over again."

"Attorneys?"

"Yeah," I said casually, "they came to town to take a deposition from me about that fight I told you about."

Three attorneys arrived early in the morning before breakfast to take a deposition for the trial of the State of Oklahoma versus James Young. The day had been exhausting, both emotionally and mentally and I wasn't interested in talking about any of the details to Jackson.

"Right," Jackson said slyly, "the one you lied to me about?"

I smiled and tried to hide my guilt. "I didn't lie to you about it."

"You're lying now!" Jackson yelled out in amusement.

I shook my head. "How do you know that?"

Jackson laughed again. "I didn't, I just thought I'd see how you'd respond then I'd know if you had been lying or not."

My mouth fell open and I laughed at the fact that he had baited me into telling the truth about the lie. I grabbed the worm I was struggling with and threw it at the boy. "Jackson, you are the worst!"

"You throw like a girl," Jackson laughed and cast his fishing line again.

"I sure hope so." I laughed back, and it felt good.

Owen made Lacey walk with him to search the entire grounds of Ashford Academy, twice. Then for hours the two of them sat on a wooden park bench outside of Covington House waiting for any sign of my return. Lacey passed the time talking with friends as they passed. Owen spent his time ignoring Lacey, and beating himself up for not being honest with me about having to attend the Debutantes Ball.

Finally, Lacey threw her head backwards in disgust and complained. "Ugh! We have been sitting here for long enough. Why don't we go eat lunch together, I'm famished."

Owen looked at Lacey's pout and then at his Rolex watch. "You're right, we should probably head over there to look for Scout."

Lacey grinned at the idea of having an attractive lunch date to flaunt to the other girls. She grabbed Owen by the hand and tried to pull him along. "Come on, I'll show you to the dining hall."

Owen pulled his hand free from her affections. "I'll manage without the escort, thanks." Owen began walking in the direction of the main building with Lacey uncomfortably close by his side. Owen shoved his hands into the pockets of his slacks to help emphasize the fact that he was not at Ashford to be friendly with Lacey in any way. "You left the flowers for Scout in the room on her night stand, right?"

"Yes," Lacey replied with annoyance.

"With the note from me?" Owen sought assurance.

Lacey acted appalled at the young man's distrust in her. "Why don't you just race up there and check?"

Owen exhaled with hostility and kept quiet the rest of the walk. Once inside the dining hall he looked in all four corners for his missing girlfriend with no luck. "I don't think she's here yet."

"I'm sure she'll show up," Lacey noted, "Let's go get some lunch together."

Owen looked suspiciously at Lacey and then took one last, failed look around the room. He silently motioned for Lacey to lead the way to the lunch line. Lacey filled her tray and promptly chose a high profile location for the two of them to sit and eat their lunch. Owen appreciated the location because he could monitor everyone who came and left the meal.

The anti-couple sat at a the table and Lacey began the chatter. "Are you going to the Carolinas again this summer."

Owen shot the girl a look of contempt. "Under the circumstances, I don't think that is appropriate conversation right now."

Lacey curled her lip in repulsion. "You don't have to get so upset. I was just asking because our families have gone there every summer for as long as I can remember. It would only be normal for you all to go again."

Owen rested his arms against the edge of the table and leaned in close to Lacey. "Rest assured that what happened last year between you and I in the Carolinas will never happen again. And, if my family goes this year I am asking for Scout to come along. So don't get your hopes up that I will even be talking to you when we are there."

"Owen, please don't be so dramatic!" Lacey chided with a grand grin.

I pitter-pattered up the shoreline in my bare feet. The sun was warm and I was enjoying the freedom of being in the solitude of nature and the friendship of Jackson. I picked my head up in time to see Jackson return from the truck with a picnic basket in his hand. I picked up my pace and met him as he set the basket down in the soft green grass.

"Lunch is served!" He said to me with a grin.

"What have you got in there?" I asked slyly and tried to charm the information out of him before he lifted the lid.

"Ah, Ah." He pushed me back a little and spread a blanket on the ground for the two of us to share. Then he gestured toward the blanket. "Would you care to join me for lunch?"

"I would love to," I responded politely and sat down on the picnic blanket next to him.

Jackson pulled peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, a bag of chips and a bottle of strawberry wine from the basket. He joked, "Gourmet, I know you're impressed."

"It all looks good, but I can't drink that wine. If I go back drunk, I'll get expelled for sure!"

Jackson looked at me as if I had missed the easiest part of a riddle. "Scout, you left school before wake up with the janitor to go fishing. I don't think a few sips of wine are what are going to get you expelled. Besides, it's the only thing I had at my house in a bottle I could bring."

The reasoning made me chuckle as Jackson pulled the cork from the bottle. "Would you like the first sip?"

I was apprehensive. "I've never had wine."

"That's okay, just take a few sips to acquire the taste first, then the rest of it will slide right down."

I raised the bottle to my lips and took a first sip. The flavor bit my taste buds and I immediately pulled the bottle away and forced the liquid down my throat. My face crinkled in repulsion and Jackson laughed at me. I shook off the taste and scolded him. "Don't laugh at me."

He laughed harder and he grabbed the bottle from my grasp and took a large sip. When he was done he looked over at me with his trusting round eyes. "I'm sorry Scout. I considered buying some sodas, but none of the stores were open that early. Besides, most girls I know like to drink this kind of wine."

"I'll be fine." I grabbed a sandwich and took a few bites. Looking across the water I thought about how easy it had been to keep Owen from my mind even though Jackson and I hadn't caught a single fish. Then my thirst caught up to me again and I eyed the wine. One thing I wanted more than anything was a big drink of something, so I grabbed the bottle, held my breath and took a big swig.

Jackson watched in amusement. He clapped his hands a few times and whistled to encourage me to drink up. Bravely, I took two more big swigs and even thought the taste was awful, my thirst was quenched, at least for the moment. "That-a-girl." Jackson praised me.

"You didn't leave me with too many options, cause I was sure thirsty and I wasn't about to ask you to take me back to Ashford."

"Yeah, we'll let those richie riches have their time there. I think we are doing just fine all by our lonesome. Don't you?"

I looked across the water and thought of Owen. It was hard to imagine that he and Lacey may have been hiding in the shadows of the Academy buildings sharing a kiss, touching each other and laughing in joy that I was out of their lives for the day.

Owen and Lacey returned to the bench after the last of the girls had finished their lunch. After hours in the hot sun Lacey's aggravation grew as she waited for my return. Even having Owen by her side was becoming less enchanting for her. She moaned, "Waiting here for her is ridicules. What is so special about her anyway?"

Owen, resting comfortably on the bench with his shirtsleeves rolled up, paused a minute then an uncontrollable smile lit up his face as his answer came to mind. "She's not you."

"What's that suppose to mean?" Lacey sat up straight and slammed her hands onto her hips.

Owen gazed off into the distance so his memories would be more vivid as he spoke. "It was the first day of school in September. I walked into my European History classroom with a couple of my buddies. We were horsing around and being loud. Everyone in the room was paying attention to us, but her. She sat in the front row of the classroom with her nose in a book."

Lacey interrupted, "How is that special?"

"It's different. She's different." Owen said simply then continued with his recollection. "After that day, I tried everyday to get to our classroom before she did. I watched her walk in and hoped she would look at me so I could smile at her when she walked by, but she never looked. She just kept her head low and avoided looking or talking to anyone. Unlike most of the girls in Tulsa, she never paid me any mind. Then one day, a few weeks later, I was working at the cemetery where our family plot is and I noticed a nasty storm rolling in. I barely had my tools packed up when the rain began to pour. I was soaked when I climbed into my truck and headed back towards the work shed. Before I got there I noticed this girl running along the cemetery road, trapped in the cold downpour. I pulled over to offer her a ride to shelter and when she looked up I saw those blue eyes look back at me I knew right away who she was. My heart about jumped out of my chest when her sad eyes met mine. For me, it was love at first sight."

Ignoring the last part of what Owen had said Lacey questioned, "Wait, if she wasn't interested in you what was she doing at the cemetery in a rain storm?"

"It's a complicated story, but that's where her parents are buried." Owen stated.

Lacey rudely laughed out loud and raised her eyebrows at the fresh information. "Do you mean to tell me that she's a charity case and an orphan?"

Owen turned from his relaxed position on the bench to confront the debutant. "What did you just call her?"

Seeing the displeasure on the boys face Lacey dropped the smile from her lips and jumped from the bench. "I'm going to go see if she is in our room."

Owen grabbed the girl's hand to keep her from fleeing and stood to intimidate her. His voice was low and threatening. "Don't you ever refer to Scout as a charity case again! That could be no further from the truth. Scout and her family fend for themselves, they all pitch in and they make due with what they have."

"Owen! She's poor!" Lacey said with extreme disgust in her voice. "You are in the elite social class in Tulsa. What are people going to think when they hear you think you love a poor, orphaned girl from the wrong side of the tracks?"

"Lacey, I'm not like you. I really don't care what anyone thinks," Owen replied, "Scout is perfect for me in ways you'll never understand, and I love her."

Jackson and I stood by the side of the river with our lines cast into the water. I was dressed in my camisole and Capri pants because it was hot in the sun and I had taken my sweater off just after lunch. After I shed a layer Jackson asked my permission for him to take his shirt off because of the heat. Growing up with boys I had no problem with his request, so now he stood a few feet away from me in just a belt and his blue jeans. From time to time I peeked over at his muscular and trim physique.

Thirsty, I leaned over to pick up the wine bottle and felt my head swirl just a bit from over consumption of alcohol and the heat. I put the bottle to my lips and took the last drop from the bottle. "All gone," I declared and tossed the bottle backwards towards the picnic basket. Jackson looked at me and for the second time it seemed out of place to me that he was a maintenance man at the school. "Jackson, can I ask you something."

"Shoot," he said.

"If you're not super smart, how'd you get out of high school early?"

The young man reeled in his line. "Football," he simply said then cast his line back out again and didn't elaborate as a way of making me dig for more information.

"Football? I suffered through your wine, stood by the side of a fishless river all day, let you disrobe yourself in front of me, and all you're going to tell me is, football?"

Jackson looked over at me and cocked his head back a little. "I hated school and to make matters worse, I wasn't that good at it. See, the public high school around here is kind of small and they have always had a pretty good tradition of having a winning football season till just a few years ago. So this coach, he knows I am a pretty strong guy and his team needed a guy with some muscle, so he asked me to join the team my freshman year. I told him no, and he didn't even make it to playoffs. Next year, he asked, I told him no and they missed the playoffs again. So in my junior year, it all happens again, but the team makes the playoffs, and loses. So right about then the coach is ready to kill me. He doesn't have anyone else in the school who is big enough to be a decent center and make the big plays. During the holiday break, I meet the coach down at the local diner. He tells me he wants nothing more than to take the team to the state championship and he'll do whatever it takes. Then he asks me again to join his team." Jackson paused a moment to reel in his line again. "I finally realize I am the one holding all the cards. So I say to him, I heard about this job opening up at Ashford Academy in a year and to get it I need to have a high school diploma." Jackson casts his line again and looks over at me to deliver a side note to the story. "Now keep in mind. I am not particularly bright when it comes to schoolwork and graduating from school probably isn't going to happen for me anytime soon, and the coach knows this. He thinks a few minutes and says, 'If you help me win the state championship I'll personally see to it that you get your diploma and graduate a semester early."

"Could he do that?" My eyes widened in disbelief.

"Sure! This is rural Oklahoma, nobody cares what goes on around here. Besides a state championship is something people around here can hang their hat on. It's well worth giving a guy like me a diploma for that kind of school notoriety."

"I take it you're school won the state championship?"

"Damn straight!" Jackson boasted, "and I hold the school record for the most quarterback sacks."

I shook my head and laughed at the boy who had bargained his way out of high school. Then I grew a little jealous that there had been a way Sodapop could have done that. I know if he had he would have made Ponyboy proud.

Suddenly, a tug at my line changed the subject. "Jackson, I got a bite!"

"Reel it in." He secured his pole on the shore and came over to see if I needed any help.

I reeled the line in a few feet then the tug on the line grew in intensity. Jackson watched in suspense as he gave directions. "Let the line out then reel it in some more."

The tug on the line grew stronger, my footing was a little tipsy from the wine and my gleefully giggling made it hard for me to concentrate. Seeing I needed assistance Jackson nestled behind me and wrapped his arms around me to help hold the pole and reel in the catch. His excitement could be heard in his words. "Let the line out. Okay now, wind the line and lean back. Let the line out some more, now reel it in and lean back!"

The two of us laughed and tugged and tugged and laughed then, snap! The line broke as we were leaning back and the two of us fell onto the picnic blanket behind me. I landed next to Jackson and the effects of the alcohol kicked in and I found it hard to control my silly giggle. Jackson lay next to me with his arm trapped under my back. The two of us laughed out loud for a minute then he rolled his half naked body up beside me and gazed into my eyes. "You know what, Scout?"

"What?" On accident, I spoke louder than I had to.

Jackson beamed at me. "I don't think we are going to catch any fish today."

My silliness continued as I responded, "You know what? I think you're right!"

The two of us laughed some more then the look on the young man's face grew more serious and he leaned in towards me and spoke, "I'm still hoping to leave here with a catch though." In his next move he pressed his body against mine, leaned in and kissed me.

In the first second, I froze and thought of Owen. I didn't want to betray him. My second thought was of Lacey and how I had no doubt already been betrayed. So I puckered my lips and kissed him back. I inhaled the scent of his musky cologne. My head swirled some more and without removing his lips from mine Jackson kissed my lips a second, third, and fourth time. He pulled his head back from mine and smiled, hoping I would do the same in response. I did.

My devotee ran his fingers through my short hair. "I really like you, Scout."

"I really like you too." I giggled with drunkenness.

The news made Jackson grin and seemingly gave him unspoken permission to continue with his romantic behavior. He lifted his body up a little and rested it more squarely on top of mine. Too much wine had loosened my inhabitations. I took my fingers and ran them up his muscular, naked chest and held onto his neck. Jackson leaned back down and kissed me again, French style.

After dinner Owen walked back to Covington House one last time. He sent Lacey into find me, but again, she came out alone.

"You better not be lying to me Lacey McGovern!" Owen warned her. Then he looked up at my window and out of frustration he yelled my name. "Scout?"

"Shhh!" Lacey scolded, "knock that off, you look and sound like a fool!" Owen yelled two more times and Lacey scolded him again. "She isn't up there, and if Miss Lemon hears you you're going to get Scout in trouble for going missing in the first place."

Owen ceased his hollering because he knew Lacey was right. Owen looked at the setting sun and knew he had run out of time. There was no doubt he needed to leave for home. Distraught, he felt tears welling up in his eyes and he looked to the girl who may have ruined his life. "Lacey, you better be sure Scout sees the flowers and knows that I came here to see her. The first thing I am going to do when I get home is write to her and tell her that I was here for her. You better not mess up, or I'll be dropping this postcard to your dad in the Tulsa outgoing mail!"

"Don't worry, Owen." Lacey flashed a bright smile. "I'll tell her all about it."

Apprehensively, Owen took a few steps backwards to determine if he could trust the girl, then he turned on his heels and headed to his Chevrolet that was parked near the main building.

Jackson pulled his truck to the side of the road that led to the academy. He looked up and down the road to be sure we were alone then he lead over and kissed me. I kissed him back and felt a warm rush of emotion. It was nice to be needed. It was also nice to know that Jackson wasn't disappointed that we didn't go any further than fooling around with our shirts off. If he had, I would have felt like an idiot for falling for him in the first place.

I ended the kiss quickly while we were still unseen. I didn't want to get caught for any of the sins I had committed. I bid Jackson one last goodbye and jumped out of the cab of the truck. Quickly, I crossed the road and ran deep into the woods that lined the school until I couldn't see the road any longer. My first moment alone in the dark woods held the euphoria of first love, but the feeling waned with every step I took that lead me back to Covington House.

I couldn't stop my mind from recalling all of the words I had read in Owen's letters to me. "I need you, I want you, I miss you, I love you." A week ago those words meant everything to me. They were the reasons I worked hard and endured the agony of my situation. Now, they were my agony because the memory of his words was only leading me to further confusion and guilt. How could he have said and written those words knowing what he had done and the secret he was keeping from me. Did he really think he would never be caught?

The image of him smiling and holding Lacey's hand in the photo made my stomach turn sour. Knowing when I walked from this woods he may still be there, loving her, giving her the affection I thought he once held for me only tempted me to flee back into Jackson's protecting arms.

Back on the road Jackson watched as I disappeared into the woods. When he knew I was out of sight and our secret was safe he put the truck into gear and let it idle for a moment while the blue and white Chevy Camaro drove past. The young blond haired man waved in a friendly way as he passed the maintenance truck. Jackson waved back and did a u-turn once the road was clear. As night fell the two boys headed for their homes.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty Four**

It was still early enough in the evening that the back door to Covington House was still unlocked. I slipped in unnoticed and climbed the stairs to my room. Before anyone could see me, I grabbed my bathing supplies and toothbrush from my closet and knew I needed to take a shower. I turned to leave and noticed the vase full of roses on Lacey's desk. Jealousy burned inside of me. I walked over and picked up the card that had the top half torn away and read the inscription, 'Love you dearly, Owen'. The words fueled my resentment into a simmering rage. I tossed the card back onto the desk and stormed over to Lacey's mirror. Carefully, I examined my neck for any signs that I had been off in the woods necking with the maintenance man. When I was convinced I was evidence-free, I headed to the bathroom.

With my short hair I could shower at night and be ready to go in the morning without much primping. I enjoyed the seclusion of the bathroom in the evening, and I was anxious to eliminate any scent of where I had been and what I had done.

When I was clean I slipped on my pajamas and walked out of the bathroom. In the hallway, I noticed my roommate and her friends out of the corner of my eye. I looked away and heard Tucker's voice call out from down the hall. "Lacey, those flowers Owen Jasper brought you are gorgeous."

"Aren't they?" Lacey spoke louder than she had too. "They are from my new boyfriend."

Many of the Covington House girls came to their doorways and stood out in the hall to see and hear what all the fuss was about.

"Owen Jasper? You mean the boy that Charity Case said she was dating?" Tucker yelled out to antagonize me.

It worked, but not in the way that I ran to my room in tears. It pushed me to respond in a way that would have made Dallas proud to call me his friend. I set my laundry and bathing supplies down against the wall and strolled down the hallway towards the girls with a tuff stance and a look on my face to match. A few of the girls gasped and readied themselves to watch the approaching heated exchange. Seeing my displeasure, Lacey fell quiet and stepped away. I smirked at her, amused by her fear. I walked up to Tucker, whose eyes were wide in astonishment, but she seemed to feel the need to have to stand strong in front of her peers.

"Have you got something you'd like to say to my face, or would you prefer to just keep talking behind my back?" I looked up at Tucker, because she was about two inches taller than me.

Tucker's face grew as tough as it could and she tried again to verbally hurt me. "I was just trying to figure out why Owen Jasper would come all the way here from Tulsa to be with Lacey if he was really your boyfriend."

I glared at the girl with an unexpected confidence. "Was, he was my boyfriend."

"Yeah, I could tell." Tucker got cocky. "I didn't figure he was interested in you the way I saw Lacey and him snuggling on the park bench and holding hands and such. I'm not surprised though, Owen Jasper's got class and I recently heard you're not only a charity case, but an orphan too!" Tucker grinned as a slow murmur from the other girls rapidly filled the hall. "I guess your parents wanted you around just as much as Owen did!"

My temper flared and without concern for my future I grabbed Taylor by her fancy white shirt and slammed her body up against the wall. "If you've got a problem with me, why don't we settle this outside? Because I'm ready, just say the word and we'll go?"

Tucker's face grew white with concern as she glanced at Lacey, no doubt looking at the remnants of the black eye I had given to her friend a week before.

Hearing no challenge from my enemy I issued a warning. "This is how it's gonna be, Tuck! I don't want to hear another word about Owen, or orphans or charity cases for the rest of the time I am here. Not from you, not from Lacey or anyone else in your slimy little circle of friends. I'm a lot tougher than I look and I'm in a place in life where I have nothing to lose. So if you think you can beat me, just say the word and we'll settle this like we do back in my neighborhood."

Tucker faintly shook her head no. The murmur in the hall rose again and I heard footsteps on the nearby stairs.

"Miss Curtis!" Miss Lemon demanded, "Unhand that girl this instant!"

I grinned at Tucker to let her know I wasn't afraid of punishment. I let her go and patted the wrinkles I had put in her blouse hoping no one would notice how badly my hands were shaking. Then Sodapop's voice echoed in my head about why he likes fights, 'it's like a dance or drag race or something'. He was right. I was so hyped up I felt like I could take on the world all by my lonesome.

Miss Lemon reached my side and pushed me down the hall towards my room. I grinned with joy and called out to Tucker and Lacey over the older lady's shoulder. "Anytime, anywhere."

"Hush up!" Miss Lemon quietly scolded me then she pushed me into my room and shut the door. "What do you think you are doing?"

I backed up a few steps in case my breath still carried the scent of alcohol and replied. "It's called, sticking up for myself."

"It's called threatening another student."

I laughed a little. "I didn't threaten her, I warned her."

Miss Lemon took a second to calm herself. She took in a deep breath, let it out and spoke in a calmer tone. "Scout, we just talked about this last week. You and the other girls must find a way to get along."

"That's what I was doing. Lacey and her friends spend most of their free time teasing and belittling me and if Ashford Academy isn't going to do anything about it, I will."

Miss Lemon shook her head and looked at me in a loving way. "Scout, my dear, violence is only anger and anger is a form of hate and if you let it that hate will eventually consume you and make you a coldhearted and lonely girl. I know you are stronger than that."

I heard the woman's words as if they had come from my mother's mouth to Dally's ears.

Memories of my mother trying to convince Dallas of the same thing made me realize that it wasn't jail or juvenile hall that made Dallas Winston the heated and aloof boy he was. It was the hate that he carried with him. I thought of Dallas's motto, 'you get tough like me and you won't get hurt'. He wasn't right, he was tough and he was hurt more often than he wanted to admit.

I looked back at Miss Lemon. "Yes, ma'am. It's just that I want their teasing to stop, and they weren't going to do it just because I asked them too. I already tried that."

"I know," Miss Lemon said sweetly, "but trust in yourself. You are smarter than they are. You are going to make something of yourself because of your strength, and you don't want to ruin your future over the careless words of a few under loved, overly spoiled girls."

Instantly, I knew the older woman was right. I needed to be stronger and calmer. I had carried myself with poise through so many situations before this and come out triumphant on the other side. This time was no different. "You're right, Miss Lemon. I am sorry."

Miss Lemon smiled and rubbed my cheek with her hand. "Good. Now let's put this little incident behind us and move on, okay?"

"Okay." I smiled and called out to Miss Lemon who was headed out the door. "Miss Lemon? Thank you."

She turned back towards me. "Scout, in good times and bad my door is always open." The lady smiled one last time and opened the door to leave as Maria walked into my room with my bathing supplies and laundry in her hand.

"I didn't want you to forget these." She smiled and set them on my desk.

"Thanks."

Maria hung out a moment then spoke up. "Nice job out there, and I don't mean that sarcastically, I really mean it and so do a lot of the other girls. For too many years Lacey and her friends have ruled this place just because Lacey thinks she is the queen because her dad is President of the Board. I think a lot of us have been waiting for someone like you to come along and put those girls in their place."

"Well, I think I may have gone about it the wrong way." I cringed a little.

"Maybe, but you did get your point across and a lot of us are really glad you did." Maria took a few steps toward the door before she shared another thought with me. "I want you to know that you should be proud of being here on scholarship. It's a great accomplishment and I am guessing that if your parents were still around they would have been proud of you too."

"They're dead." I clarified in a friendly way, trying to do, as Miss Lemon wanted me too. "On their wedding anniversary a year ago, they were killed in a car accident."

Maria's eyes widened in surprise before she responded gracefully, "I am sorry to hear that."

I smiled at my memory of them. "They were proud of me."

Maria smiled and understood that I was finally learning that not all Covington House girls were like Lacey. "Why don't you come on down to my room and talk. The gals I hang out with are pretty cool and I am sure we would all get along just fine."

"I will, but not tonight. I got up pretty early and I have a lot on my mind tonight. I just need some time to think."

Maria frowned. "All right."

"I'll see you tomorrow at breakfast?" I offered.

"All right." Maria's frown turned upside down and she walked out of the room closing the door behind her.

I turned off the light and crawled into my bed. I laid there in the dark thinking about everything; Ashford, Maria, Miss Lemon, Jackson, Owen, Ponyboy, Casey, Darry, college, Two-Bit, Steve, my parents, Sodapop, Johnny, Dallas, Kathryn, the vacant lot, court, James, the newspaper and then I drifted off to sleep before my roommate came to bed.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter Twenty FiveChapter Twenty Five

The subpoena for my presence at the trial for James Young was delivered on Sunday afternoon. The document required my appearance at the Tulsa Courthouse early Monday morning. I couldn't have been happier.

Mr. Donaldsen spoke with the prosecution attorneys and learned they had arranged for a member of the State Patrol to escort me to the courthouse. My social worker, Mrs. Dillard, received permission from the Judge for me to spend the overnights in my home. I was so excited to be going home to see everyone that I could barely sleep that night.

The State Patrol Officer arrived early in the morning before any of my classmates were awake or any of the teachers were on campus. Miss Lemon gave me a sack filled with fruit and a sandwich for my breakfast, which I picked at on the ride home to Tulsa. The trip there was long and filled with mixed emotions. I was eager to see Darry, Soda, and the gang, but equally devastated to have to testify or see James or Owen. To calm my nerves during the trip, I tried to focus on seeing my family again. That was what I wanted more than anything!

As the car rolled along the highway, I sat in the backseat with the wind blowing in my face. I laid my head back against the sun-warmed vinyl seat and an early memory of Darry and I entered my mind.

I sat on the front porch with my six-year-old legs dangling over the edge. It was a warm spring day, and the neighborhood was unusually quiet. Behind me, the screen door creaked open and Darry jogged out of the house and into the front yard. He grabbed his football from the lawn and then turned and noticed me.

"Scout, where is everyone at?"

"I don't know."

My brother looked around the empty neighborhood and when he didn't find what he was looking for he turned back to me. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing."

"Good!" He smiled. "Come with me." Without waiting for my agreement Darry grabbed my little hand and pulled me off the porch. I stumbled when I hit the ground, but twelve-year-old Darry pulled upward, with my hand in his, to keep me from hitting the ground. I scampered back to my feet and followed him out through the gate without question. Most of my life I never questioned what Darry told me to do.

The two of us headed to the lot. My shorter strides made my feet travel twice as fast as my brother's feet. When we reached our destination, Darry turned to me. "I need to practice my catches so I you need to kick the ball to me. Can you do that?"

I shrugged my shoulders without answering out loud.

Darry frowned a moment, but was determined to make his plan work. He proceeded to instruct me on how to properly and effectively kick the ball high enough into the air for him to be able to practice. After several demonstrations he handed the ball to me. "Now it's your turn."

I grabbed the football in my tiny hands, held it out, tossed it in the air, and gave it a kick with my equally tiny foot resulting in what should have been expected, a tiny kick.

"No, no, no." Darry said before demonstrating again. "Kick it like this."

I watched as the football soared through the air and landed on the other side of the lot. I looked up at my brother. "I don't think I can kick it that far."

"Sure you can." Darry said with optimism. "You just have to try harder."

I stood in waiting while Darry ran to the other side of the lot and kicked the ball back towards me. The ball bounced along the ground and I chased after it and picked it up. I lifted it up and tried to kick it again, then again, and again. Darry didn't leave my side and he didn't let me quit.

After thirty minutes, I looked over at my brother. "I'm going to go home. I don't want to try anymore."

Darry looked at me in disappointment. "No, Scout! You need to try harder. I haven't even been able to catch any. The harder you try, the better you are going to be at this. So here, try it again." He handed me the football.

All afternoon I tried and tried and as dinnertime approached Darry's expectations had been met. I was able to kick the ball high into the air allowing Darry time to run towards the ball and catch it again and again and again. When the sun was beginning to set, we heard our father call for his children to come home for dinner.

Darry jogged back towards me with the football in hand. "Nice work, Scout. Let's head home for dinner." Darry led the two of us out of the lot and I limped behind him. When we reached the street, he looked behind him and called for me to hurry up. He paused a moment and noticed my gimp. "What's the matter?"

"My leg hurts a lot." I whined.

"You are such a sissy." He said with discontent. He beckoned to me, "Come here, I'll give you a piggy back ride home."

I hobbled over to my brother and climbed up onto his back. It felt good to have my weight off of my leg. My brother carried me all the way home and right into the house where he dropped me onto the couch.

"Where have you two been?" Mom asked as she walked into the dining room with the kitchen towel slung over her shoulder.

"Playin' football in the lot." Darry told her.

"Just the two of you?" My dad asked from the table where he was sitting and waiting for his children to come home to eat.

"Yep." Darry answered from the bathroom as he washed his hands for dinner. "I took Scout over there to kick the ball to me."

My dad laughed at the thought of how poorly my kicks must have been. "Did she get any of them to you?"

"Scout, go wash up for dinner." My mom told me over the top of Dad and Darry's conversation.

"It practically took all day, but she finally figured it out." Darry finished his conversation and flopped down into his chair at the dining room table.

I stood up from the couch and limped my way into the bathroom. My mother took notice. "Scout, is there something wrong with your leg?"

"It's just a little sore." I said simply and walked into the bathroom.

My mother fussed over me. "Let me take a look at it." She followed me into the bathroom and sat me down. She examined my leg and felt my ankle. "Does your ankle hurt or just your leg?"

I frowned. "They hurt a little, but mostly it's just my foot."

My mother slipped off both of my shoes and pulled off the sock on my right foot revealing the beginnings of a large purplish bruise. She yelled, "Darrell Junior, get in here!"

Darry came to the doorway and looked at the bruised foot and then to my mother. She scolded him for harming her baby. "What is this? How could you let this happen?"

Darry looked at her a moment with little expression. "She's got to learn to be tough mom. I'm just trying to teach her to be tough."

The wind blew against my face as the memory faded. We drove into the city and I drew my attention to watching the familiar scenery race by the window. The unmarked police car pulled up outside the Tulsa courthouse. I gave the building a long stare before I opened my car door. I remembered being there for Duke Dobbins' trial and coming to see the judge when my parents died. I wasn't looking forward to being back to testify again, but I knew it was just another moment that Darry had tried to prepare me for. I had to be tough. I took in a deep breath to calm my fears of the unknown then I walked toward the front door leaving the officer to haul my old suitcase into the building.

Inside the courthouse door was a sheet listing the trials scheduled for the week. The officer read the sheet. "The State of Oklahoma versus James Young. Here it is, courtroom 2, second floor."

I looked at the sheet where the man had pointed. "Yep, that's the one."

The officer looked back to me. "I'll take your suitcase upstairs, but this is as far as I go. Do your best to be sure that guy gets put in jail, okay?"

"Okay," I said, and the officer tussled my hair and we headed over to the staircase and slowly ascended to the second floor. At the top of the stairs, the officer left my suitcase in my care as I stood in the long hallway lined with doors to different rooms and benches for people to sit and wait.

I lifted my suitcase and started walking down the hallway as my eyes searched for anyone I knew. In a second, I saw Sodapop sitting on a long, wooden courtroom bench halfway down the hall. I notice him stare a long while at me and then suddenly he realized who I was.

"Scout!" He shouted and ran down the hall to greet me. I ran a few steps and jumped into his arms. Sodapop lifted my body a foot off the ground as the two of us hugged so tight we almost couldn't breathe. "Scout! I can't believe you're really here!"

"I missed you so much, Soda." I said with my face nuzzled into the crook of his neck.

Sodapop put me back onto the floor and moved his head back slightly to look at me. "You cut your hair?"

I reached up and caressed my sheered locks with uncertainty. "I know. It's just easier to take care of this way. Do you like it?"

My brother nodded his head slightly. "Sure, I don't think I ever remember your hair being this short, but you look real nice."

"Thanks, Sodapop." I said with a smile and hugged him again. "I wonder what Darry will think about it? How is he doing?"

Sodapop's grin split his face. "Why don't you ask him yourself?" Then my brother stepped to the side revealing someone else who had been waiting for me.

I stood for a moment and stared at the man who was waiting a hundred feet away. His build was weak and thin. He held a cane in one hand to hold his body upward. His hair was short and his skin was paler than I had ever seen. At quick glance I could have mistaken him for a stranger, but in a moment, I knew it was Darry. My mouth dropped open a bit as I tried to figure out whether to jump for joy or cry with guilt for what I had done to him. Only his voice calling out my name and the grin on his face broke me from my state of astonishment. I smiled in relief that he was out of the hospital and quickly walked towards the now fragile man.

"Darry!" I wrapped my arms around his body and he hugged me with his free arm. I tried to hold back my tears and could only mutter in guilt. "Darry, I am so sorry. I am so sorry for all the trouble I have caused."

Darry shushed me like a good father shushes a wounded child to calm their fears. "Don't worry about it, Sissy. Everything is going to be fine. We've all pulled through before, we'll pull through again."

Sodapop came up behind us and joined into our embrace. A moment later Darry let go and looked at the two of us. "I think I need to sit down." Sodapop and I agreed and we painfully watched our weak brother hobble back to the bench that rested against the wall. I sat between my brothers and gently rested my head against Darry's shoulder.

"I really missed you." I said softly and sniffled back a few tears.

"I missed you too," Darry said as he threw his arm around my shoulder and kissed the top of my head. "Your hair sure looks different. Did the staff at Ashford make you cut it?"

"No, I just did it to try to make my life a little easier."

"Easier?" Darry questioned. "You said in your letters that things were going good at Ashford."

"They're going great!" My answer was so loud it reverberated through the nearly vacant hall. I softened my next response and tried to act like I wasn't telling a lie. "I am doing really well, my grades are fine, I've made new friends. I really like it there." I smiled up at Darry to help seal the truth from surfacing.

"That is really good to hear," Darry said with a proud grin.

I turned my head a little and caught the look on Sodapop's face in my peripheral vision. It was a look that told me he knew more about my hatred for Ashford than he was suppose to know. The two of us shared a long questioning glance, and then I changed the subject. "Darry, I wasn't expecting you to be here. When did you get out of the hospital?"

"Yesterday," he said. "It took some arguing, but I told the doctors you were coming in town and there was no way I wasn't going to be here for you."

"Thanks, Darry." I smiled up at him but it was hard to hold the emotion to my face as I observed again his weak frame. He may have been out of the hospital, but there was no way he would be doing anything more than recovering in the coming weeks. There was no chance that he would be able to return to roofing houses or working down at the loading yard. I felt another surge of guilt at how my brother had been destroyed by my poor choices. Feeling a little sick to my stomach I wanted to get away, so I excused myself to the restroom.

I walked along the stone tiled hallway heading back to the top of the stairwell where the restrooms were located. I was nearing my destination when I heard a familiar voice approaching the second floor. I knew as soon as I saw the tall, blond figure I knew it was the one person I was not ready to see, Owen Jasper. My stomach flooded with nerves. I looked around for a place to hide, but there were no quick options. The boy had reached the second floor and was only a few feet from me when I noticed his eyes widen in surprise.

"Scout? Scout, is that really you?" Owen looked at me then he stepped towards me with a delirious grin and cradled my head in his strong hands and looked into my eyes. "I can't believe you are here! You have no idea what I've been though since you called."

Stunned and upset by his unexpected affection I stared wide eyed at him, but couldn't formulate a response.

Owen glanced over his shoulder and noticed his attorney lingering nearby waiting for his client's attention again. Owen scanned the hallway for privacy and spotted the telephone booth behind the two of us. He grabbed my arm and pulled me into the oak trimmed, close quarters that were recessed into the wall. He pushed the glass and wooden accordion door shut tight, the overhead light turned on, and he looked down into my eyes.

"Scout, you never gave me time to explain. I don't think you understand that what happened with Lacey and I was before I met you, and it wasn't even my idea. I was never in love with her. I can't even say I cared about her; we just did what we did and it didn't mean anything!"

My hands began to tremble with fury as I stood against the wooden bench cramped between the wall and boy who had betrayed me with lies. "You sure seemed to care enough about her to escort her to a dance not long ago."

"That was just business. It was a debutantes' ball, and I had made a promise to attend way back in August that my mother insisted I keep. I didn't even want to be at that dance, and I didn't care to be partnered up with Lacey!"

Hearing his words only confused me as I tried to rationalize everything that had happened. "You cared enough to call her at Ashford the day after I talked to you. She told everyone about it, and I heard her on the phone." My eyes welled up with tears of frustration as I recalled the feelings and continued to rant. "I heard the words she said to you. I heard her laughing in amusement as you spoke to her!"

Owen's eyes grew wide in astonishment and his voice raised in defense. "That was a one-sided conversation! She faked her amusement."

"It wasn't a fake that you came up on Saturday to visit her! The visitor card with your name on it wasn't a fake. Do you have any idea how humiliating that was when she flaunted her visitor card in front of me and in front of everyone in my house?" I screeched.

Owen's voice cracked in surprise, "I didn't call her to talk to her. I called her and begged her to break the rules and let me talk to you! I didn't go to Ashford to visit with her. I went to see you! The first thing I told Lacey when I saw her was that we were going to her dorm and she was told to go in and get you, but you weren't there! I waited outside your dorm the entire day! I brought you flowers!"

Owen's story began to change my interpretation of what I had been seeing and hearing. Guilt made my stomach uneasy as I thought about what had happened between Jackson and me. I stammered in response. "I… but that… that's not what she said. I saw the flowers, but she said you had brought them for her."

"She lied!"

"Well, how was I supposed to know that?"

"Because we love each other! We are supposed to trust each other!" Owen bellowed and stared at me waiting a second for a response. When I stood speechless, he tried to find answers to his own questions and fears. "So, where were you?"

I pulled my head down and mumbled. "Fishing."

"Fishing? You were gone the whole day fishing? With who?" Owen asked with suspicion.

I paused a few seconds to consider my response. "With the maintenance man who had been bringing me my letters when I was in the infirmary."

"What?" Owen loudly questioned the response.

I yelled back in defense of Jackson's actions. "When he heard you were coming to see Lacey so soon after breaking my heart he, felt bad for me. He said he didn't want to see me hurt anymore, so we snuck away and went fishing."

"Scout, I didn't mean to break your heart. You didn't even give me a chance to explain."

I looked up at Owen's crystal blue eyes and pleaded my case. "Owen, I didn't know that! Lacey told me that you two were in love. She told me you would never really love a poor girl like me, and that I was just a fling like a rich man has with his maid. It got so I didn't know what to believe. I wasn't thinking clearly." Tears puddled in my eyes.

Owen frowned because he was well aware of the cruel things that Lacey had said to him about me. Forgivingly, he caressed the side of my cheek with his fingers. "It was just a fishing trip; it's okay."

"No it's not." I sniffled back my guilt and whined. "I didn't know you still loved me. Owen, I thought you were through with me, so I … I kissed him."

The news nearly toppled the strong boy. He leaned back against the payphone for support. Disbelief filled his face as he mentally re-examined my words. "What do you mean, you kissed him?"

"I kissed him." I answered and tried to explain the situation. "He kissed me first, but… but I kissed him back. I'm sorry, Owen. If I had known the truth about you and Lacey I would have never even gone to the river with him."

Owen's face showed his heartbreak and his voice expressed his anger. "You didn't even give me the chance to tell you that attending the dance was just work for me! I never wanted to be there, and nothing happened other than a few dances and a picture! Scout, you should have known how much I loved you and you should have trusted me that I would never have hurt you!" Owen wiped the first showing of a tear from his eye.

"But you did hurt me and I was alone and confused. You have to forgive me, Owen. I am so sorry I messed everything up." I watched Owen fight to keep his emotions quiet as I tried to explain my point of view. "I never meant to cheat on you. Owen, I thought you were through with me. You have to believe how sorry I am."

Owen's emotions built up into a fury. "I can't believe you kissed him. I can't believe you did this to us. You never even gave me a chance to explain. You just believed everything Lacey said and decided to just end things between us. You even replaced me before I had a chance to talk to you!"

My face frowned with fear as I begged. "Owen, that wasn't my intention. If I had known…"

"You should have known!" Owen yelled and it was the first time I had ever seen and heard him be that mad. He looked down at me with an angry stare as he wiped his eyes. "If you really loved me, Scout, you would have known." Before I could beg for his forgiveness again, he yanked the door open with frustration and stormed down the stairs away from me, and his waiting attorney.

Shocked and confused by what had just transpired, I fell back onto the phone booth bench. My mouth hung open as I recalled Owen coming back to me with all of his love and all I had to offer him was my betrayal. How could I have become so befuddled as to mess up the one perfect thing in my life? In an instant, hot tears of frustration flooded my eyes and I buried my head into my hands and wept.

A minute later, I heard a soft voice by my side. "Sissy? It's going to be okay?"

I didn't have to look up to know it was Sodapop. "No, everything is a mess."

"Listen Sissy, I know it's hard, but there will be other guys. Besides, you have to pull it together because they are calling everyone into the courtroom."

I sniffled a few times and looked over at Sodapop who was squatting beside me. "He tells you everything, doesn't he?"

"Only because he loves you so much." Sodapop knew I was referring to Ponyboy sharing all of my secrets about my life at Ashford Academy.

I couldn't deny that Sodapop's response was true. I wiped my eyes and sniffled some more. "Does Darry know about the problems I've been having at Ashford?"

"No. He thinks you love it there." My brother offered up a friendly smile.

"Does Darry know about Owen and me?"

Sodapop winced a little. "He probably does now."

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. I wasn't ready to have to explain everything that I had done wrong in the past weeks, and I regretted that the little time I had in Tulsa with my brothers would have to be mired in sadness. I took a few deep breaths, wiped my eyes one final time, and stood up with Sodapop by my side. He took my hand and walked me down the hall. Slowly, Darry stood up and leaned on his cane for strength. When I came near him, he put a supportive hand on my shoulder to let me know I had his comfort if I needed it. He didn't mention anything about Owen seeming to be mad at me, but it didn't take long for him to put two and two together when Owen sat a few rows behind us with his attorney and without a word to me.


	26. Chapter 26

Chapter Twenty Six Chapter Twenty Six

Sodapop helped Darry and I sit in the front row, where the prosecuting attorneys had requested we be, and then he took my suitcase to our car. Darry and I sat together silently. I knew he wanted to ask about Owen, and he knew I didn't want him to. Instead, we let the proverbial elephant walk into the room and take his place on the bench next to us.

After everyone but Sodapop had taken their seats in the courtroom, a side door opened and the Bailiff escorted the accused to the defense attorney's table. James looked shabby in his black and white striped jail uniform, and I was quick to notice he was not handcuffed. The situation made me a little skittish, as the only barrier between James and I was a low wooden railing. Immediately, I became anxious for Sodapop to return so he could sit to my left between James and I to keep guard over his weaker siblings.

"Hey ya, Scout." James said as he sat down, draped his arm over the back of his wooden chair, and smiled at me as if he was trying a pick up line at a school dance. I didn't say anything, but I couldn't stop looking at him. I watched him closely as he leaned towards me a little. "I almost didn't recognize you with your hair like that."

James' attorneys tried to shush the boy for his own good. James argued with them a little. He sat quiet for a few seconds then he turned his attention back to me. "So, whatcha you been doing while I've been away?"

"James Young, you oughta hush and leave that girl alone! You're in enough trouble as it is." A woman's voice called out from a few rows behind James. Darry and I looked over our left shoulders and notices James' mom, Delores. attempting to discipline her son.

"Shut up, Ma!" James yelled before his attorney grabbed his arm and spoke with him in a low, stern voice. James didn't speak after that, which was a good choice because the jury had entered the courtroom, and Sodapop had returned to my side for opening statements.

After the Judge had entered the courtroom, I took few peeks at James as he slouched in his chair. I watched as he sneered at the jury from time to time and took random glances my way. I wrung my hands together in an attempt to dissipate the additional anger the boy was causing me.

Darry took notice of James, too. At one point, he grabbed my hand in his as a way to let me know that he sacrificed himself once for me and he would sacrifice himself again if he had to. I squeezed his hand lightly to let him know I understood.

I barely paid attention to the opening arguments on either side. Instead, I spent the morning in the front row with my head low. I used the time to try to sort through my emotions and memories of the past few months. Sadly, yesterday everything seemed so clear, Owen had been the liar and the cheater, Lacey was the love of his life and Jackson was the one friend I could trust. Now I wasn't sure what the truth was. For hours, I struggled to avoid thinking about Lacey, Jackson, or Owen because every time I did I felt my throat tighten as if I was being chocked by my own bad decisions.

After the defense finished with their opening statement, the Judge ordered the court to break for lunch. As people stood up and filed out, I convinced Darry and Sodapop to wait a while before we exited the courtroom. My plan was to dawdle long enough so everyone I didn't want to see had enough time to leave the courthouse.

When the courtroom emptied, Darry turned to Sodapop and me. "The Defense will never be able to win with that story."

"What story?" I asked out of curiosity.

Darry sized me up with the disappointing glare he usually used with Ponyboy. "What do you mean, 'what story'? Weren't you listening?" I looked at Darry and he knew I hadn't heard a word that had been said all morning. His eyes grew icy. "Scout! This is serious, you need to be paying attention or he could go free. He would be back on the streets and we don't want him back on the streets!" Then I noticed Darry show an emotion he rarely expressed, fear.

I swallowed my ignorance and answered softly. "Yes, sir."

My agreement didn't calm Darry down. "Scout, their whole defense is based on putting a belief in the mind of the jurors that you wanted James there!"

"I didn't want him there!" I snapped.

"I know that, but the jury doesn't. They don't know what to believe. So you need to be paying better attention, and whatever is going on between you and Owen you need to take care of it now! You need to focus. It's time to be tough."

Then the middleman in the family stood up to help decrease the growing tension. "Why don't we head out to the car? I've packed us some Pepsis and sandwiches for lunch." Without waiting for us to agree, Sodapop pulled Darry to his feet and helped him out into the aisle for his labored walk to the parking lot.

In shame, I followed behind. Watching my oldest brother struggle with simple tasks was just more added pain in my life. Walking so slow towards the hallway nearly crushed me as I remembered the speed he used to travel with the football and the tumbling he could do with ease.

When we entered the hallway, I expected it to be vacant of all the people that I knew. I was disappointed when I noticed Owen and his best friend, Pete, leaning against the wall engrossed in what appeared to be an intense conversation. I couldn't help but believe the exchange was about me, and all that I had done wrong.

Slowly, Darry, Soda, and I walked past the two friends. No one said a word. I tried to look busy by stuffing my hands into the pockets my skirt, and I was sure to keep my head low to avoid eye contact. We headed to the elevator and I felt folded paper money in my pocket. Reminded of why I had them, I pulled out the bills and separated the fifty-dollar bill that Mr. Ottavi had given me from the forty dollars Owen had mailed to me over the weeks. With a guilty feeling in my gut, I stared at the money. It didn't belong to me anymore, and as always, Darry was right. I needed to focus, and I knew I needed to clear my conscious. I pushed the button to call the elevator and looked to my brothers as the doors pulled themselves open. "Go ahead without me. I'll meet you at the car. I have to take care of something." I backed away from the elevator.

"Scout?" Sodapop questioned my unspoken plans in a warning tone.

"I'll be right down. Get Darry some lunch," I said and turned away from the closing doors. I inhaled deeply to steady my nerves and cautiously walked towards the two boys who had returned to what seemed to be a heated discussion. As I approached, Owen and Pete ceased their conversation and looked down at me. 

"How are you doing, Scout?" Pete greeted me in a friendly way.

Unintentionally, I ignored Pete and turned my attention towards Owen. I gathered up all of my courage and spoke the words I wanted to tell him the most. "Just so you know, I don't plan to ever go on a date with Jackson again. It was never my intention to be more than just friends with him, and I never expected what happened between us to happen. I am sorry for hurting you. That wasn't my intention either." I could feel my regret begin to suffocate my words. "When I get back to school, I'll mail your letterman sweater back to you."

Owen glared down at me with a rare cynicism. "Why don't you just give it to Lacey. At least she wants it."

"O?" Pete loudly scolded his friend.

I didn't let Owen's sarcasm stall what I had gone there to do. I raised my hand with the folded money pinched between my finger and thumb. "This is yours. I never used it and I wouldn't feel right keeping it." I peeked up at Owen to be sure he would extend his hand to take the cash.

Owen's mood instantly mellowed and he nodded his head at the money. "Keep it. Your family could use it right about now."

"We'll do just fine," I said as sadness began to choke my throat because there was a good chance my family wouldn't ever be back together again. I knew I was close to tears, and I didn't want Owen to have the satisfaction of seeing me bawl. I wanted to finish my task and get away from the boy. I watched as Owen looked at the cash but didn't make a move for it. I raised the money a little higher. When I noticed he wasn't going to take it, I dropped the paper bills to his feet, turned, and stomped away.

"Take the money! Scout?" Owen called out.

I heard his demand, but kept walking. Then I heard a collection of footsteps approaching from behind, but I didn't turn to see who it was.

"Scout?" Pete's voice called out and he grabbed my arm. "Scout, just wait. I'll talk to him. We'll sort this all out."

"Don't bother, Pete." My lip quivered and I knew Owen had told Pete about what I had done. "It's probably for the best."

"No it's not!" Pete stepped in front of me and insisted I let him try to fix things. "You don't know him like I do. Since Oliver died, I hadn't seen him truly happy until you came along. I don't want him to lose that over a few mistakes. This can all be fixed. He's just mad and stubborn. He'll get over it."

"Pete, I appreciate your words, but I don't think I'll ever truly be right for him. Trust me, in the long run, Owen will be better off without a charity case like me. I have to go; my brothers are waiting for me." I pulled loose from Pete's grasp and hurried down the steps as he quietly begged for me to come back and work things out. 

I didn't look back. No one followed me as I headed out the front door towards the parking lot to try to eat lunch with my family, even though my throat was tight with sorrow.

"Sissy." Sodapop's voice called out to me from the opposite direction of the parking lot.

I looked over to find him and Darry sitting on a park bench under a tree with their Pepsi and sandwiches. I wiped my moist eyes, inhaled to steady my emotions, and walked across the lawn to be with them.

Sodapop smiled and handed me a sandwich wrapped in wax paper. "It's peanut butter and jelly, just like you like."

I took the sandwich and flopped down on the bench next to Sodapop, who was now in the middle of his siblings. I watched Soda take a bite of his triple-decker bologna and cheese sandwich with pickles and ketchup and was sure I wasn't a bit hungry.

"So?" Darry looked over at me for the answer to his unspoken question from the morning.

I looked back at him. "What?"

"So what happened with you two?" Darry pried, showing more interest in my personal affairs than he usually did.

I frowned and tried to keep the extent of my misery to myself. "It's a long story."

"We've got plenty of time." Darry reminded me and devoured the remains of his first sandwich.

I lowered my head and stared at my unwrapped sandwich. "What if I don't want to talk about it?"

"Fine!" Darry's tone was filled with agitation. Sensing he wasn't going to get too many words out of me, he leaned forward past Sodapop and looked over at me in more matter of fact way. "I just want to know that you have things taken care of so you can concentrate on what you are here for!"

"If that's all you're worried about, don't. I can handle my own problems and focus too. Okay?" I responded in a miffed tone.

"Listen, I am worried about you. All I have been doing for weeks is worrying about the three of you," Darry sassed back. "So if it's not too much trouble for you, I would appreciate a little respect."

I shouldn't have looked directly into Darry's eyes when he said the word, respect. Looking at him only made my heart palpitate with shame. I sure hadn't given him much respect by lying to him in the past weeks about almost everything in my life.

In remorse, I sat back on the bench and noticed a glance from Sodapop. I looked away with a scowl on my face, and I silently cursed Ponyboy for telling Sodapop about everything that I had written to him. Whether it was because he loved me or not, I was still furious with him for not honoring my request for a pinky swear.

"Tell me about Ashford Academy." Darry suggested, trying to fix the sour mood amongst us.

I sighed heavily, which caused Darry to tense up. Then I thought about repeating to him everything that I had written, but because most of my words were lies, I couldn't remember them. Next, I considered just delivering a short speech about how lovely everything was, but I knew at least Sodapop would know that I wasn't being honest, and that kind of shame was beginning to tear me up inside. Finally, I shrugged my shoulders and couldn't bear to look at either one of them as I spoke.

"The truth is…I've been lying to both of you because being at Ashford has been horrible! I am sorry for lying, but I couldn't bear to tell either of you what it's been like because I didn't want you to worry or feel bad for me." I leaned forward and looked to Darry. "I just wanted you to be able to get better as fast as possible because all I want is to come home." My lower lip began to quiver.

Sodapop wrapped his arm around me in his usual compassionate way. "Don't worry about it, we aint mad at you."

"What is so horrible about Ashford?" Darry skipped the compassion and asked to broaden his comprehension of my misery.

I couldn't help but blurt out, "Everything! For starters, my roommate is a witch! In the first hour of meeting me, she sized me up and figured out how poor I really am. Then it didn't take her long to figure out I was the first student ever to have a scholarship to Ashford Academy."

"Scout, a full scholarship like that is an honor." Darry tried to praise me.

"Sure, to you and me it is because we are poor, but not to girls like Lacey. To her, I am nothing more than a charity case, and that is exactly what she calls me in front of all the other girls!"

"Don't let her talk to you like that! You should take care of it and tell someone about it." Darry coached me, as if telling a wealthy adult at Ashford would make everything better.

"Who was I supposed to tell? My friends? Cause I don't have any or how about my house mother, whose first words to me insinuated that she knew I was nothing but a poor, rough greaser girl from the north side of Tulsa, which I ended up proving correct when I had enough of Lacey's big mouth and shut her up with my fist."

"You did what?" Darry snapped.

"She had it coming after what she said!" I defended myself.

"Scout, do you have any idea how much trouble that could get you?" Darry asked, still stunned by my behavior.

"Darry, you don't understand how horrible she really is. Plus, she and Owen know each other and that night she was rubbing it in that she was in love with him. She told her friends Owen was in love with her too. I tried to prove her wrong, but then she showed me a picture of the two of them at a dance together from only a few months ago. I couldn't believe he had been two-timing me. I was devastated." I wept.

"So you punched her?" Darry questioned with agitation caused more by Owen's supposed betrayal than by my behavior.

"Not for that! I punched her because she wouldn't stop patronizing me, and then she insulted Mom and Dad. I tolerated her name calling and I tried to deal with the news of her and Owen as best as I could, but I wasn't going to let her get away with the nasty things she said about our parents. They deserved more respect that that!"

Darry couldn't figure out what to say next. He sat forward and rubbed his forehead in dismay then he glanced over at Sodapop who had uncharacteristically refrained from participating in the conversation.

I peeked over and noticed my older brother cock his head in question and ask his younger brother for the truth. "You knew about all of this the whole time, didn't you?"

Sodapop's eyes grew wide as he looked for a way to avoid being part of the discussion. "Don't blame me. Like always, I'm just the middle man in all of this."

Darry sat back, looked away from his little buddy to try to make sense of the confusion, and then he turned back towards me. "So is that what you were talking to Owen about, the picture?"

"Kind of." I winced a little. "See… actually …after I hit Lacey I ran away…" I noticed Darry's eyes widen in a hurry and I knew I better speak fast to keep him from losing his temper with me. "But my friend Jackson stopped me. He listened to me and tried to help by sneaking me into one of the buildings and letting me use the phone. At first I called Soda, but no one was home. Then I called Owen to ask him if he was Lacey's date at the dance. When he said yes, I hung up on him and fell apart."

"Sissy?" Darry softly questioned me, but didn't have the words to continue.

"But that's not even the half of it," I said with a weep. "The next day, Owen started calling Lacey every night. Then she received a visitor card and rubbed it in that Owen was coming to see her, and they were in love. Like an idiot, I believed her, so when Owen came to visit I spent the day away from the school on a fishing trip with Jackson."

"The maintenance man?" Darry asked for clarification.

"Well, he just turned eighteen, and that didn't help my situation because we kind of ended up… kissing." I noticed Darry's eyes roll into the back of his head. I grimaced a little and blubbered onward. "Then today when I was talking to Owen he told me the other side of the story. He wasn't calling Lacey to talk to her; he was trying to talk with me. When he came to visit he was actually there to sneak a visit with me, but I was nowhere to be found because I was off in the middle of nowhere ruining everything."

"Scout, Owen's got to know that you were just confused about everything." Soda tried to reassure me.

"He did at first, until he found out about Jackson and I, then he lost his temper and stormed off!"

There was a little pause between us then Darry looked at me with hope in his eye. "Sissy, I think you are worrying too much about all of this. Owen is pretty crazy about you. Just give him some time, he'll come around."

Soda held me close to his side and I bawled. "He's not going to come around. It's over. And the worst part is it's really all his fault. The Debutantes Ball he went to was nothing more than fulfilling a promise he had made to one of his father's friends before we met. What Lacey didn't tell me was he was assigned as her date, he didn't choose her. If he had been honest with me, I would have known better than to get so upset. He should have told me. I don't understand why he just didn't tell me the truth from the start. I mean, why would someone who cares so much about you lie like that?

Darry turned and looked directly at me to make his point. "I don't know, Scout. Why would someone lie to the ones they love?"

Immediately his words to me stung and I understood my error in judgment. With a heavy heart, I looked at my brothers in sadness. "I never meant to hurt you by lying. I just thought it would be better if you didn't have to worry."

"Maybe Owen felt the same way?" Sodapop replied softly.

I looked to my brother and knew he was right. Owen was probably just trying to spare my feelings by not telling me about the dace. I didn't matter though, I pouted.

"Well, it's too late now."

"I doubt it." Darry raised his eyebrows and unwrapped his next sandwich. "Don't worry too much about Owen; he loves you. He'll come around."


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter Twenty Seven Chapter Twenty Seven

My brothers and I were the first to arrive back to the courtroom after lunch. We walked to the front row of the gallery, turned to find out seats and then Sodapop stopped abruptly in front of Darry and me, causing a small collision.

"What's the matter?" I stepped backwards and looked up at Sodapop.

Sodapop looked back at me with an astonished look on his face. "There's money laying up here." He walked along the front row bench and picked up the paper bills and counted them. "It's forty dollars. Why do you think it's here?"

I rested my hands on my hips and looked back at Sodapop with disappointment. "Owen probably put it there." Soda looked back at me in question, so I clarified the situation for him. "When I went back to talk with him, I gave him back all the money he had sent me at Ashford. He told me to keep it, because my family could use it more than he could. When he refused to take the money back I threw it at his feet. After everything that's happened I didn't want anything from him."

Sodapop smiled and pulled his wallet out of his pants pocket. "Dig it!"

"Sodapop, we are not taking that money!" I spoke in a loud tone to force my opinion on my brother.

Soda looked at me with raised eyebrows. "Finders keepers."

"No! You're not keeping that money. It's going back to, Owen. I don't want it."

"Scout, this is almost a week's pay for me, and I aint working none this week and neither is Darry. We've got bills to pay and groceries and medicines to buy. So the way I see it, finders keepers!" Then Soda made it very visible to me as he stuffed the bills into his wallet, and put his wallet back into the pocket of his dress slacks.

I furrowed my brow and looked to Darry to hoping to have his support on my decision. To my dismay, he showed no signs of pride. I frowned hard knowing Darry wanted the money just as much as Sodapop did. I sighed heavy and knew neither of my brothers would be turning away the charity.

I walked along the bench silently towards Sodapop and took a seat as the defense team walked back into the courtroom. I watched them as they walked by. I didn't like them.

I knew I had to swallow my pride, just as my brothers had. I told myself to be thankful Owen had left the money for the only 'poor folk' he knew. Then I reached into the pocket of my skirt and pulled out the money Mr. Ottavi had given me almost a month ago.

"You can have this too," I spoke softly to Sodapop and handed over the barely worn fifty-dollar bill.

Sodapop's eyes grew wide with excitement as he took the money from my fingers. "Where did you get this?"

"It's the money Mr. Ottavi gave to me."

"You still have this?"

"Yes, there is nothing I need it for at Ashford. You keep it for bills and stuff."

Sodapop shook his head. "Na'uh Scout, you'll find something you need it for, like phone calls home. You keep it."

"No, Ashford pays for our phone calls when we earn them. Students only get a set amount of phone time each week and right now I've got zero. So you take the money."

Sodapop looked at me with his soft and caring eyes. "Are you sure?"

"Sure, I'm sure." I smiled back at him.

Soda's grin widened and I could see the relief of stress drift across his face. "Thanks, Sissy, this will really help out."

I sat back on the bench with a satisfied grin. "Speaking of phone calls, I can't wait to call Ponyboy tonight. He's going to be so excited to hear from me. Besides, he's gonna get it from me for not pinky swearing about all the stuff I wrote to him."

I looked over at my brothers for a response and noticed the two of them looking at each other as if they were playing a mental game of rock, paper, scissors. Then Sodapop seemed to lose. He turned to me with sadness in his eye. "Scout, you won't be able to call him tonight. Pony can only make and receive phone calls on Tuesday and Thursday nights and one on the weekend. Sorry." Then Soda perked up a bit. "But, I doubt you'll be done by tomorrow, so you'll be around to call him tomorrow night."

My brother was right, but after the miserable day I had been having I finally felt completely deflated. I leaned forward onto my elbows and rested my face in my hands. At first, I cursed my bad luck. Then I prayed that the trial would drag on and on so I could stay home longer. Finally, I closed my eyes and thought about Ponyboy. I really missed him. I couldn't believe we had been apart this long and waiting another whole day was going to be harder for me than Sodapop or Darry could ever understand. Ponyboy and I weren't like them. Darry and Sodapop were the best of friends, but Ponyboy and I were soul mates. My mind drifted to a memory of the two of us, and how we did even the almost everything together for as long as I could remember.

Pony and I nuzzled our two little four-year-old butts into our dad's chair in the living room, and Ponyboy opened up the storybook I had picked out.

"I read the first sentence, then you read." Ponyboy decided.

"Why you get to read the first sentence?" I questioned because I wanted to go first.

"Cause I'm older, that's why." Ponyboy said as I folded my arms across my chest and sunk into a pout. Ponyboy didn't care, he was in charge and that is all he wanted as he read the first sentence. "Little Red Hen woke up on a bright and sunny morning." Ponyboy looked to me.

I couldn't hold my pout any longer, because it was my turn and I didn't want to get skipped. I put my finger up to the words and read, "She walked across the barnyard in search of her friends." I finished my sentence as our father walked into the living room and looked down at us.

"Are you two cuddle bugs sharing a book again?" He asked and sat down on the couch.

"Yep!" Ponyboy answered and bragged, "I read the first sentence, because I'm oldest, then Scout read one and next is me again."

Dad laughed. "You two are best friends aren't you?"

"No." I shook my head and tried to improve my father's perception of the situation. "We're twins!"

My dad laughed even harder as Sodapop wandered into the room with his freshly made sandwich, and looked over Ponyboy's shoulder as the two of us continued to share sentences. After listening to a half a dozen words Sodapop interrupted us. "What are you two weirdoes doing?"

"Reading," I told him.

"Why don't you each just read your own book?" Sodapop looked at us in confusion.

"Cause we're twins," Ponyboy told him.

"That doesn't mean you have to share everything all the time," Sodapop informed us.

"Yeah it does," I told our seven-year-old brother.

"Well, if you ask me, I think reading is a waste of a day." Sodapop shoved a bite of sandwich into his mouth and darted out the front door to play.

My dad looked over at us from his own book that he had checked out from the public library. "Never mind that brother of yours, he must have been fed him an extra helping of jumping beans before he left heaven." Ponyboy and I giggled. Dad always said the funniest things.

"Darling?" The sound of James' mother's voice pulled my attention away from my thoughts. I turned and looked at her. "Before this starts again, I want you to know that James aint never had nothing but nice things to say about you."

"Thanks, Delores." I said softly and smiled politely hoping she would just go away. I looked down towards the floor, and thought about how I didn't care what James had to say about me.

Delores didn't get the hint that I wanted her to leave me alone. "I know I aint been that good of a mother to him as I should have. You really should know that."

I looked at her with raised eyebrows and an exasperated tone. "I know that, Delores." I looked away again and hoped she would leave before my true temperament towards her revealed itself.

The woman didn't appreciate her appeal for sympathy being ignored. She raised her voice, "I'm just saying, he's not really an evil boy."

My blood pressure shot up, and an appalled voice yelled from the back row of the courtroom. "He nearly stabbed her brother to death, and tried to kill her!"

Darry, Soda, and I turned our heads in unison to confirm with our eyes who we already knew had spoken up to put the woman in her place.

I noticed the scowl on Owen's face as he glared at the woman and finished what he had to say. "Now, go sit down on the other side of the courtroom and leave the family alone." Owen's presence was commanding as he sat coolly with his arm draped along the back of the wooden bench.

I took a long look at Owen. In that moment, his facial features seemed harder than they had ever been. Even when our eyes connected, I could see bitterness in them that I never realized he had. The boy peered back at me, emotionless.

With a broken spirit I turned back around on the bench. I noticed Darry lean forward, elbows resting on his knees. He was looking over at me. "Don't worry, he'll come around." Darry said with the same lack of emotion Owen was possessing.

I looked away from my brother, let out a heavy sigh. The courtroom filled with a few more spectators. I looked behind me and across the aisle and notice a few boys who didn't know to wear their Sunday best to a trial. I didn't recognize them and assumed they were James' friends from the Brumly gang. I looked away and watched the jury take their seats. Everyone in the courtroom then stood in unison as the judge took the stand, everyone sat down again, and then the prosecution called their first witness.

"The prosecution calls, Peter Roth."

I turned my head over my left should in time to find Pete's mom fiddling with his shirt collar before he walked to the front of the courtroom as his father patted him firmly on the back for support. Then I turned my neck a few inches more to the left and found Owen still sitting alone. His parents hadn't come, and I was almost sure they wouldn't be present for any of the proceedings. I felt bad for him, because I knew that my parents would have never made me go through this alone.

After swearing in and announcing his name, Pete readied himself for questions from the prosecuting attorney. "How do you know, Scout Curtis?"

I looked up at Pete and he grinned, looked to the back of the courtroom, and spoke louder than he had to. "Because my best friend is in love with her."

I swallowed hard and wished I had the guts to turn around and read Owen's reaction to the statement, but I didn't. Instead, I sat quiet listening to the questions and answers about James accosting me in the school hallways and later the incident in the parking lot at Rusty's Diner. One particular response drew my attention more than the others when he said. "I should have just left the two of them alone to kiss. I can't help but wonder, if I hadn't pointed the two of them out if James would have even known they were in the car. In a way, I've kind of thought this was all my fault."

I looked up at Owen's best friend and silently questioned how any of this could be his fault when clearly, it was all mine. I listened more attentively after that, and by late afternoon the defense was given the opportunity to proceed with a cross-examination.

At first, the defense attorney's questions seemed to be standard fact checking, but then the twist Darry had warned me about began to reveal itself.

"You say, Owen Jasper is in love with, Scout Curtis?" The defense attorney asked.

"Yes he is." Pete responded confidently.

"In your opinion, how often would a young couple in love go out on a date in a month's time? Just, in your opinion."

Pete shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know, maybe a dozen days."

"Really?" The defense paced the floor and paused for effect in front of me. "How many days per month do Scout and Owen go on a date?"

"What kind of date are you talking about?" Pete questioned.

"A study date or out to a movie or out with friends."

"Maybe six times a month." Pete answered and you could see he was trying to discover the story the defense was attempting to create.

"Six?"

"Maybe." Pete said with apprehension.

"Not many for a couple in love, is it?"

Pete sat up in his chair. "Well, Owen tends to work a lot…"

The attorney interrupted. "Simply answer the question, yes or no."

Pete frowned and thought about what to say, and then he responded, "I don't know."

"You don't know?" The attorney questioned, "Well, do you find it odd that a young couple in love would choose to sit so far apart during a trial for a man who supposedly attempted to kill the young lady?"

"Objection!" The prosecution attorney declared from his chair. "The defense's line of questioning has no relevance."

"Your honor, the presence or absence of love between the two is relevant to the fact that James Young was misled by affections of that young lady." The defense attorney clarified his position and pointed in my direction.

My mouth dropped open in disgust, and I turned to Darry and whispered. "I never misled James with affection!"

Darry leaned in close to me and his whispered tone was forceful. "This is why I told you to focus. The defense is trying to make a case that you led James to believe you loved him, and feuding with Owen isn't going to help your case."

My eyes widened and my lips pierced themselves open in shock. Darry was right again. The rest of the afternoon, I sat back and listened closely as the defense finished their preposterous line of questioning with Pete that was riddled with calls for 'objection', the defense's explanation, and the Judge's responses of 'overruled' or 'sustained'.

By the end of the day I was dumbfounded. I couldn't believe the defense has suggested I climbed out of Owen's car against his wishes so I could be closer to James to make plans to rendezvous later in the evening. The defense put the idea in the jury's head that I preferred James rough demeanor towards me, and that it was common among girls from my 'social class' to want to be ruled by our lovers, even a secret lover.

More times then naught, I wanted to stand up and scream how untrue the defense attorney's statements were, but I understood that he didn't work for me. I understood he was only making a case for reasonable doubt, and he was doing a mighty fine job of it!

A few minutes after Pete left the witness stand the judge dismissed the courtroom for the day. Eager to leave, my brothers and I stood up and moved into the aisle. I noticed Owen was gone from his seat and nowhere to be found. Through the small crowd of people Pete walked up to me with concern in his eyes.

"Scout, can I talk to you a moment?"

"Sure." I said softly, and the two of us walked between the empty wooden benches, a few feet away from everyone else.

Pete looked at me with a saddened face. "I'm sorry, I didn't do to well up there for you."

I smiled lightly to make him feel better. "Don't worry about it. You did just fine."

"I don't know about that." Pete said then he changed the subject. "Did you find the money?"

I raised my eyebrows a bit in revelation. "Yes, thanks for putting it there. My brothers really appreciated it."

"I didn't put it there," Pete said as he watched the smile slip off of my face. His eyes grew compassionate as he softly spoke, "He really does love you more than he knows how to show you."

I frowned. "I appreciate that, but…"

Pete interrupted me, "You have to realize that he's really good at being stubborn, and he knows he should have told you about the Debutantes Ball. I told him to tell you way back when it happened, but he didn't want you to be hurt or confused. Even though he didn't want to go, he also wanted to keep to his commitment to be there. He's funny that way, he doesn't like to let people down, and he knows that's what he did to you. I think that is what pisses him off more than anything. Well, that and the thought that you might actually give Lacey his letterman sweater to wear." Pete ended his comment with a chuckle.

I smiled back, but I didn't know what to think. "Thanks, Pete. I know Owen is really lucky to have friend like you, and if you'll excuse me I've got to get going."

"Sure, no problem." Pete said and we parted ways.

I walked out to the car with my brothers, and climbed in between them in the front seat. As Sodapop drove home, I couldn't stop my grinning, or the jitters of excitement in my belly as we turned on to my street and our dilapidated home came into view. All I kept thinking was 'I'm home. I'm finally home'. Even though I wanted to sprint into the house, I waited patiently for Darry to climb out of the car. My anticipation built as I slowly followed behind him and Sodapop through the front gate. Just as I was about to run around the two of them, and dart into the house, Sodapop turned around to me with the car keys in his hand.

"Scout, run on back to the trunk and fetch your suitcase."

I frowned, but did as I was told. By the time I had shut the trunk lid and started up the walk with my luggage Darry and Sodapop had walked into the house and shut the front door behind them. Stunned by their un-thoughtfulness I marched up the porch steps semi-dragging my suitcase along with me. I pulled open the screen door and pushed open our heavy wooden front door.

"Surprise!" A collection of voices yelled. I jumped at the sound then my eyes looked around the room to find it filled with all of the people I wanted to see the most.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter Twenty Eight

Before I could say hello or thank any of the guests for being there, Two-Bit scooped me into a tight bear hug and howled in amusement, "Sissy Curtis is home again!" Then he planted a short kiss onto my cheek. He stepped back and stared at me. "Lordy, they made you cut your hair short too?"

"No, I cut it on my own." I giggled when I looked at Two-Bit's character like face. "It's just easier this way."

"I like it." Two-Bit nodded his head in approval and moved on to a new thought. "Tell us, how surprised were you to see Darry at the courthouse? Real excited, I bet."

I thought about the moment I had recognized Darry in the courthouse hallway. Excitement wasn't among the gamut of emotions I had felt, but I choose to appease Two-Bit's assumptions. "I was really excited to see Darry and Sodapop. In fact, I'm really excited to see everyone here. This is very nice of all of you."

"Well, you're worth it." Steve walked over and gave me a quick one armed hug. "We've sure missed you around here."

Two-Bit chimed in, "Yeah, because we've had no one to clean or cook for us." The boys laughed, clinked their beer bottles together and took a big swig.

"I wouldn't say that's entirely true," Casey said with a smile and cautiously walked towards the three of us. "I've put together some pretty good dinners for everyone." Casey stood a few feet in front of me and smiled, hoping for acceptance back into my life.

The last time I had seen her, she wasn't my friend. She was the girl who had betrayed my brother, and in the process our friendship, but in four short weeks so much had changed. She had atoned for her mistakes and committed herself to taking care of my family when I couldn't. For that, I loved her.

I looked her in the eyes, forgave her, and embraced her in my arms. She grabbed me tightly.

"I am so, so sorry," Casey spoke softly, "I shouldn't have done what I did."

"It's okay, it's over now," I told her and we separated and looked at each other.

"Just kiss and make up already," Two-Bit called out with a chuckle.

"Two-Bit, you're the worst!" I laughed. Then I greeted Kathryn and Evie and thanked them for coming to the party.

"So, when's Owen getting here? I'm starving and ready to eat." Steve asked.

My brothers and I shared a startled look before I spoke up, "You know Owen, he has to work tonight. He won't be coming." I held my breath a moment, but no one questioned me.

"Then lets eat!" Steve commanded and headed to the kitchen.

After dinner, Kathryn said her goodbyes and headed back to school for the evening. Darry was exhausted and looking for peace and quiet, so he went to his room to sift through the pile of bills that had accumulated. Two-Bit and Evie turned off the radio and turned on the television. I changed into a comfortable pair of old worn out jeans and an old t-shirt. Then Casey and I sat down at the dining room table to join Steve and Soda in a friendly game of poker. We were betting with pennies and despite my brother's feeble attempts to cheat, I was ahead of everyone by a quarter when there was knock at the front door.

Two-Bit pulled himself off of the couch to answer it. "About time you got here!" Two-Bit greeted the newcomer to the party, then he looked over his shoulder at me and called out, "Scout, Owen is here."

I looked over at the front door with apprehension.

"Actually, I didn't come here to see Scout." Owen said loud enough to get Two-Bit's attention as he was strolling away from the door, "I'm just here to talk to Darry. Is he available?"

I watched the dumbfounded look on Two-Bit's face as he stuttered in confusion. "Uh…yeah… come on in. He's in his bedroom." Two-Bit guardedly led Owen through the living room as I grabbed the deck of cards and began focusing on shuffling them. In a quick glance, I caught the raised eyebrow look on Two-Bit's face as he walked by. Owen didn't deviate from looking straight ahead as he passed by the table.

I let a moment pass before I looked up to see Two-Bit walking back towards the table. "What gives?" He asked me.

"Nothing, just forget about it,." Soda interfered in the conversation and drew looks of confusion from Steve, Two-Bit, and Evie, who had walked into the dining room to get the scoop.

My brother ignored the unspoken questions and looked across the table at me. "Deal the cards, Scout."

I looked down at the pile of cards I had clenched in my hands.

"He has no business being here!" Casey looked over to Sodapop and I realized she knew what Soda knew. Casey huffed and folded her arms across her chest. "I tell you, he has some nerve. What does he think he is doing? Coming here just to talk to Darry. What could he possibly have to say? Why would Darry possibly care? It's all kind of weird, don't you think?"

"Easy does it, Nancy Drew," Steve chided Casey.

"Are you two in a fight or something?" Two-Bit sat down at the table and asked me.

I didn't look up or answer him.

"Just deal the cards," Soda said again to try to help move the focus off of the problem between Owen and I.

Casey turned towards me. "We should find out what he is doing here!"

"I don't care what he is doing here." I told her.

"Yes you do!" Casey said.

She knew me pretty well.

"What's going on?" Two-Bit asked, but his request fell on deaf ears.

I looked to her. "Exactly, how to you expect to find out?"

"We'll listen at the door," Casey replied and stood up.

"We'll get caught and I'll get skinned," I told her.

Sodapop reached across the table and grabbed the deck of cards from my grip. "Just stay put!"

Casey didn't listen as she clutched my arm. "Better idea! We could go outside and listen through the open window. He'll never know we were there. Come on, the curiosity is killing me. Let's go before we miss too much." She pulled my arm and I rose to my feet to follow her. Casey looked to the others. "Ya'll better not rat us out!"

I didn't hear the gang respond as I followed behind my friend through the kitchen, down the hall and out the back door without hesitation. I really was just as interested in knowing why Owen was there as much as Casey was, if not more.

Outside, she turned towards me and put a finger to her lips to be sure I stayed hushed. I thought about the irony in her action. I wasn't the most likely one to cause a commotion. Together, we walked through the grass along the exterior walls of the house until we were directly underneath one of Darry's open bedroom window at the rear of the house.

Casey held my hand as we both concentrated on Owen's voice as he spoke.

"My father said he is looking for someone who could really commit to it, someone who would be willing to stick with it, long term. I told him I thought you'd be perfect and he agreed. So we want to know if you have any interest."

Casey and I opened our eyes and shared a questioning glance. Casey was the first to break our code of silence with a loud whisper. "What are they talking about?"

I shushed her, and we listened again.

"And it's all daytime work?" Darry could be heard questioning the deal.

"Yeah, except around holidays, sometimes things need to be done on the weekends."

"And it honestly pays that much?"

Casey looked at me and questioned louder than she should have, "Wow! How much do you think that is?" Realizing she blurted out, Casey threw her body against the outside wall with a thud. Then the two of us started to giggle at her stupidity.

"Casey?" Darry questioned, then he leaned on the inside of the windowsill, and peered out into the backyard. "Casey? Is that you?"

Casey knew she was busted and if she wasn't careful she would get me in trouble too. She took a few steps backwards into the yard, so all of Darry's attention would be on her. She grinned at Darry and tried to distract him with her charm. "Hey there, Darry! What are you doing in your room when there is a party going on?"

"What are you doing in the yard?" Darry asked with suspicion.

"Just looking around, you know…"

I looked at Casey with wide eyes and begged for her to stall long enough for me to get away. It wouldn't be good if Darry knew I was eavesdropping. As Casey began to babble on about the area of yard outside of Darry's window being great for a spring garden, I slid along the side of the house toward the alley. Once I reached the corner of the house I was trapped by debris. Old ladders and lumber lay against the other side of the house. I couldn't climb over it and if I walked through the yard to the front yard there was a chance Owen or Darry would see me out the other bedroom window.

I quietly growled with disappointment that I let Casey get me into a predicament again, then I eyed the car Sodapop had parked in the side yard. In front of the car was the perfect place to hide out, so I darted away from the house and alongside the driver's side of the car and skidded to a seat in the grass and gravel at the front of the car. I pulled my knees into my chest, and rested my head back against the metal bumper. Amidst the sound of the television coming from the living room windows, I heard Darry push one of his bedroom windows shut for privacy and the second one was pushed shut a few seconds later.

"And they say a good woman is hard to find." I didn't recognize the high-pitched, nasal voice. I lifted my eyes to see a boy about five foot ten, with dark blond hair, large hazel eyes and a slumped posture strolling towards me with a gang of friends. I didn't recognize the boys so I didn't say a word.

"I thought you said this was going to be hard." The same blond haired boy asked out loud.

A second kid, who stood six foot tall with dark black, grease slicked hair, dark bags under his eyes with the glare of the devil, stepped closer to the blond. "Looks like it's our lucky day."

I looked closer at the devil filled boy and recalled seeing him earlier in the day in the courtroom. Instantly, I knew I was in trouble. I didn't know these boys because they weren't from my neighborhood. They were Northside Boys!

A third and fourth gang member strolled closer to the dark haired leader, who peered down at me and spoke in a deep, gruff voice. "I think the two of us need to have ourselves a little chat!"

I swallowed hard and blinked my eyes, but my stare never left him.

"Hey ya'll what's going on over here? The party's inside ya'know." Casey's sweet voice sang out as she walked along the car to greet the boys.

The blond boy looked over at her. "Take a hike! This aint got nothin' to do with you."

Not sensing the seriousness of the situation, Casey strolled close, threw in a smile for allure and sang back. "If ya'll are talking to her then it does. Scout and I are best friends and there aint nothing you have to say to her that I aint gonna hear anyway." Casey flashed a bigger smile, but her charm never affected the sour attitudes of the gang members.

The third boy; who was tall, slender and had a shaved head as if he was recently released from prison, walked up to Casey. "Listen, Toots', I suggest you run along before someone gets hurt!" He snarled. Realizing the boys weren't there for a friendly social call, she stepped backwards.

"Ya'll better get on out of here." Casey tried to threaten the boys. Then my ears caught the familiar clicking sounds of switchblades. I looked up at the gang and noticed the shimmer of the knife blades as they extended from the blond boy and slender boy's hands.

I gasped at the thought that James' pals had come to kill me.

Casey must have thought the same thing as me because she immediately turned and ran for the safety of the house. When I noticed she had stolen all of the attention, I used the moment to try to escape. I scampered from the ground onto my feet and darted for the front of the house. My feet only found a few steps of freedom before one of the boys' strong hands snagged the back of my t-shirt and stopped my momentum.

In a panic, I shrieked, "SODA!" but there was little chance he could hear my plea.

The devilish looking boy covered my mouth with his hand as he pulled me closer to his body and growled in a low tone. "Listen up! James is like a brother to me and I don't want to see nothing bad happen to him. You get my drift? So you're gonna go to court tomorrow and tell everyone in there that you wanted what you got. If not, me and the boys will be looking for ya."

I nodded my head as best as I could, but the boy didn't release me. Hot tears of fear streamed out of my closed eyes and down my cheeks. I could feel my knees begin to tremble and my hands begin to shake. My ears heard the high-pitched, nasally voice again. "Chaz, we got trouble!"

I opened my eyes in time to see Two-Bit and Owen approaching from the front of the house. Two-Bit was holding Owen back to keep him from rushing into the situation. Two-Bit knew more than anyone how to handle aggressive negotiations with a cool and clever approach.

From the opposite direction I heard Sodapop storm towards the group. He issued a stern demand. "Let my sister go!"

The dark haired boy laughed, "whose gonna make me?" Then his friends raised their switchblades in warning.

I looked over and saw Soda and Steve stop just a few feet from the gang. The two friends appeared furious and ready to fight, but they weren't planning on starting anything until just the right moment.

In an unsuccessful attempt to free myself, I elbowed and kicked the boy. When that didn't work I tried to wiggle free, but the leader just held me tighter. I ceased my escape for the moment.

Coolly, Two-Bit strolled a few steps closer and started a little chitchat. "What ya'll doin' around here anyway? Kind of far from your turf, aint it?"

"We go wherever we want," The fourth boy called out from behind his leader.

"That so?" I watched Two-Bit hitch his thumbs into the pockets of his blue jeans and take two steps closer. Owen followed suit, and Steve and Sodapop did the same from the opposite direction. My attention caught the unspoken words between Soda and his best friend as the two shared with each other who they planned to jump if the opportunity presented itself. I quickly looked back to Two-Bit hoping his smartness could free me.

My capture pressed his hand tighter to my mouth trapping my head against his shoulder. "James aint going to jail, and this little cupcake is going to make sure of it. Aren't ya, darling?"

I didn't answer, but I tried to push his arms away from my body. The boy laughed. I turned my frightened eyes to Owen whose demeanor seemed dangerous. I noticed his fists were clenched with rage and his arm and chest muscles were tense underneath his well-fitted light blue polo shirt.

My capture spread an evil grin across his face and spoke into my ear. "You know the only reason you aint dead is because James would kill me for it, and I can see why." Then the boy leaned in and suckled on my neck.

I let out a tearful whimper of embarrassment. I tried to wiggle loose, but the boy dug his fingers into my skin to hold me steady. At the same moment, in a controlled rage, Two-Bit reached into his back pocket, pulled out his long handled switchblade and released the freshly sharpened blade. As I let out another whimper, he lunged towards my unarmed captor and held the tip of the blade to his throat. "You and I don't want to do this, so I suggest you let her go."

As the two boys stared each other down, Casey ran from the back door towards Sodapop and Steve. Her steps slowed as she grew close to them and she called to my brother. "Here ya go, Soda."

My brother knew better than to turn his head to look at her. He simply opened his hand and placed it behind himself. Casey leaned forward and handed my brother the switchblade. Without wavering, he flipped the switch, exposed the blade, and held it out in front of him. Then Casey found a short piece of pipe for Steve to use as a weapon and a hammer to defend herself with as she stood behind my brother. Slowly, the Brumly gang's odds of dominating the fight were slipping away, and they knew it.

Two-Bit knew it too as he snarled, "You tell your boy James that he is going to reap what he sowed, and the same'll go for any of you who come round here causing trouble again." Two-Bit pushed the blade a little bit closer to the boy's jugular vein. "It'll be an eye for an eye till the last man's standing, and I got more friends on more sides of town then you know. Understand?"

The dark haired boy looked to the Soc standing in the background, then he stared down Two-Bit one last time. Believing Two-Bit meant what he said the kid slowly released his hand from my mouth then he cautiously released his grip from my body. Cautiously, I stepped a few inches to my right, and then a few inches more until I was clear of Two-Bit's body and his knife.

"Nice choice," Two-Bit said with a grin, "cause with one quick move, I could have killed ya. Don't forget that."

When I knew I was free to flee I staggered a few steps towards the front of the house where I saw Darry leaning heavily on his cane, waiting, but ready to fight with every last ounce of energy if he had too. I took a few more unsteady steps before Owen moved towards me and gathered me up in his arms for safety. Instantly, he tightly wrapped his arms around me to hold me steady. He nuzzled his face into the side of my head and assured me. "It's okay. I've got you. You're safe now, and I won't let anyone hurt you, not now, not ever."

I inhaled deeply and smelled the familiar aroma of his cologne, then I felt the warmth of his arms surrounding me like they used to.

"Get her in the house!" I heard Darry call out to Owen.

"Ya'll stay out of this neighborhood!" I heard Steve warn the boys as they walked away, down the alley.

I felt a hand pet the back of my head, and I heard Sodapop's soothing voice. "She's okay, aint she? You're okay, aint you, Scout?"

Even though my body still trembled, I nodded my head and felt Owen pull me towards the front porch. I lifted my head from his chest and let go of him so I could fall into Sodapop's arms instead. My legs were still shaking as I climbed the porch stairs with my brother's help.

Sodapop and I walked together over to the porch steps. I looked up to see Evie holding the screen door open and Darry standing on the porch leaning heavily on his cane for support. Knowing he was exhausted and mad I took in a few deep breaths in attempt to calm my nerves. He didn't need the extra grief I had caused him. Soda and I reached the top of the porch steps and chaos reared again.

"Sissy, what happened? Did they hurt you?" Darry asked with more agitation than concern.

"No," I simply said.

Two-Bit interrupted Darry's up coming barrage of questions. "Don't worry about them, Sissy. I'm gonna head over to Shepards' later to tell them what's up. He won't be too keen on them boys stickin' up for James after what that kid has done around here."

"Let's get on inside," Soda said softly as the two of us stood on the porch and the crowd gathered

"Soda told you not to go out there!" Steve jumped up onto the porch and started the blaming portion of the evening. "Ya shoulda' just stayed put 'stead of sneakin' off with Casey. Aint you every gonna learn she's trouble?" I looked at Soda's best friend and realized he hadn't forgiven Casey for cheating on his best friend.

"How was I supposed to know those boys were out there?" Casey climbed the porch stairs and questioned with irritation.

Steve looked over at her with annoyance. "Maybe you're out there playing both sides of the fence again."

"I am not!" Casey yelled, "I wouldn't do that."

"Everyone be quiet. Scout, Soda, get inside!" Darry yelled, but no one listened.

"Like hell you wouldn't!" Steve accused her.

"Come on, Steve." Evie let go of the door and grabbed her boyfriend's arm. "Maybe we ought to get on out of here for now."

"Yeah," Casey said to fuel the feud. "See you later."

"I want all of you out of here!" Darry said, and again, no one paid attention to his request.

"Ya know what, Casey?" Two-Bit looked over at her with suspicion. "Why did you want Sissy out there so bad? You knew one way or another it was gonna be trouble."

"Stop it!" I demanded, but the words failed to resolve the issue.

Casey blurted out without forethought, "I wanted to know what Owen was doing talking to Darry, that's what, and that's all! I just found it strange that he would be two-timing her one minute with some Ashford Academy debutante and showin' up to talk to her brother the next."

Suddenly, the aggression seemed to shift, as Steve and Two-Bit turned their glares to Owen who had been standing silently at the bottom of the porch steps. Owen looked up at the accusing eyes and then he looked to Casey, gritted his teeth and shook his head in disappointment.

"What does she mean he was two-timing you?" Two-Bit looked over at me with his round, caring eyes.

My heart sunk. "Nothing, really it was just all a huge misunderstanding."

"Were you cheating on her?" Steve asked with a curled lip.

"No, it was pretty much the opposite." Owen responded in his own defense.

"Scout?" Two-Bit wanted my confirmation of Owen's story.

I shook my head and answered with exhaustion. "It's a long story."

"If that's true, why did you come here to talk with Darry?" Steve asked as he glared at the boy for answers.

"He came here to offer me a job," Darry provided Steve with his answer. "Now everyone just shut up and get out of here! Soda, Scout, I want you two inside. Now!"

Sodapop pulled at my arm. "Come on, listen to Darry."

"I will," I said, but I didn't move. I stayed perched at the top of the steps and looked down at Owen. "I told you, my family doesn't need your charity."

"It's not charity, it's a job." Owen stated with dignity.

I couldn't help but ask. "What kind of job?"

Owen stared at me with his ocean blue eyes and gently said, "a good one. The kind of job that can help bring you and Ponyboy home where you belong."

I don't know if it was the words he said or the action behind them that flooded my heart, but I hated myself for snapping at him.

"If that's why you offered me the job you can keep it."

"I offered you the job because you'll be good at it. The fact that it pays enough to help bring Scout home is just bonus for your family." Owen told him.

"Well, after this, I've made up my mind, she's not coming home." Darry barked and turned to me. "As soon as this trial is over, you are back to Ashford where you'll stay and be safe."

"Darry?" Soda questioned our brother's decision.

"What do you mean, stay?" I asked.

"I mean you're going back and staying there to finish high school." Darry said. "It's too dangerous. You're not coming back to here."

"What?" I questioned.

Soda spoke up again, "Darry, maybe we should all talk about this."

"Stay out of this," Darry snapped at his little buddy. "Someone in this house needs to think rationally! I am not going to let Scout come back here and ruin her life. She needs to be at Ashford!"

Hoping to ease the concerns Two-Bit spoke up, "Darry, we'll all look after her."

"No! I already watched her die once, damn it! I'm not going through that again. Now you two get inside and the rest of you get out of here!" Darry yelled and seemed to lose even more strength. The gang knew it was best to go away, so they trickled down the steps and away from the house.

Dazed, I looked to Owen who was still standing at the bottom of the porch steps. I noticed his eyes grow moist then he simply said. "I love you."

Sodapop didn't hear him as he yanked on my arm and cried out. "Get inside before you cause anymore trouble."

Soda pulled me backwards into the house and I found myself speechless as Owen turned and slowly walked away.

**AUTHOR NOTE: I have received great reviews and emails from my readers and I love each and every one of them. Thank you for being by Scout's side and enjoying the story. **

**I also receive emails asking, "Is this the last story? Will there be more? How many chapters long will Choices be?" … and so forth.**

**As of today, I plan to just write, write, write and post it all in Choices. I have a TON left to say and I enjoy writing so when I find free time I will keep the story going for you. Where it ends, I have no idea.- sorry. Till the end, Thanks again to the hundreds and hundreds of readers and reviewers! I am very appreciative of your enjoyment of the story collection.**

**Erinskie**

**I also want to give a special thanks to me beta reader, Laura. She has been with me for a long time and I greatly appreciate all of her help, opinions and wisdom! Thanks!**


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter Twenty Nine**

Sodapop pulled me through the doorway and I looked at him with agitation. "I'm not trying to cause any trouble."

Without a word in response, Soda locked the front door.

"Soda, lock the back door and make sure the windows are all latched tight," Darry barked an order.

"Sure thing," Sodapop replied to Darry. Then without looking at me he headed off to the back of the house.

Furious, I looked to Darry and started to plead my case, "Darry, I'm not trying to cause any trouble! I'll be good! I'll be careful! I just want to come home."

"My decision is made, and I'm tired," Darry grumbled as he turned away and began to hobble back to his bedroom.

"Darry, please!" I yelled and ran through the room to get in front of him so he could see how his decision was making me feel. "I can't stay at Ashford. I don't belong there. I need to be home with you two, and Ponyboy."

My brother made a conscious effort not to look at me as he pushed past me to his bedroom door.

"Please!" I groveled, "I miss Ponyboy so much already. I can't be gone from him forever! I don't want to be sent away for good. I promise to behave and get good grades. I'll even find a job so I can help to pay the bills. Please, Darry…"

Darry paused in his doorway and looked over his shoulder at me. "Scout, you know it's not about money. It's about you being safe."

"I'll be safe!" I cried out, "I will be sure to be with someone all the time. Anyone can look out for me, Two-Bit, Steve, Owen…"

"And what about them?" Darry interrupted with a yell, "Who is going to protect them? Who will keep this from happening to them?" Darry turned towards me and lifted his undershirt to show me the long, puffy scar on his abdomen where the surgeons had cut my brother open to save his life. "Do you really want to have to live with that?"

My lip began to quiver and pout at the sight of what I had done to my brother. "Darry, you know how sorry I am for what happened. I didn't know he was going to…"

"I'm not mad at you for what happened. I just don't want to see it happen again. Do you have any idea what those guys out there might have done to you?"

I didn't have an answer.

"I made a promise to Mom and Dad to take good care of you. You may not like it, but I plan to do whatever it takes to be sure I keep that promise, no matter how I have to do it," Darry said assuredly.

I let the heavy tears fall from my eyes, but Darry didn't see them as he pushed his bedroom door shut to avoid any further discussion.

The frustration inside me begged that I open the door and argue my point, but my heart knew to leave my brother alone. Embittered, I turned and looked into the kitchen as Darry's little buddy busied himself with checking the windows to be sure they were safely locked tight.

I walked through the kitchen to the doorway that led to the dinning room. With a quivering lip I asked softly, "Soda, you're not going to let him send me away. Are you?"

Soda didn't look at me when he replied, "He doesn't want to send you away, he has to. If he doesn't, who knows what James or his friends might do to you."

Stunned to hear Sodapop was in agreement with our brother, I implored, "All I want to is to be home. I'm only fifteen, I need to be with my family."

"James Young is a dangerous kid, and so are his friends. Darry is right. Ashford is the safest place for you," Sodapop said, and for the first time since we came into the house he looked at me and I noticed the pain in his blue eyes.

"No, Ashford is all wrong for me. There is nothing for me there."

"I heard your best chance of getting a college scholarship is at Ashford."

"You heard wrong! I don't stand a chance at earning a scholarship from Ashford! Those scholarships aren't' for smart girls like me. Colleges offer scholarships to Ashford girls who are pretty, socials who'll make good wives for wealthy men."

"You don't know that." Soda said with aversion.

"Yes, I do! I know that the girls selected for scholarships last year barely had an A average, and the classes at Ashford aren't even challenging. The girls selected were just gorgeous debutantes from wealthy families. That's not me! I know that if I come back to Tulsa High I can be valedictorian, and I'll join a club or team or something to put on the scholarship application. I'll do whatever it takes."

"You don't get it, Scout! It's dangerous for you here." Soda paused a moment and turned towards me. A tear rolled down his cheek before he softly spoke, "I'll never forget that moment… kneeling in the street, holding you in my arms thinking you were going to die. I already went through that once, and I don't want to do it again. Not with you, or anyone of us."

I let the tears roll from my eyes. "But this is my home and my life. I should be able to choose how I get to live it."

"Well, you're not old enough to make that choice," Sodapop cried softly and wiped his eyes. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. I'm going to see if Darry needs any help with things." Soda pushed past me through the kitchen and into Darry's room.

Stunned, I looked around the quiet, empty rooms and grew sick to my stomach. I hated feeling so alone. It was the same way I felt at Ashford Academy. There was no way I was going back there to stay!

I took a moment to let the sorrows and the rage I was feeling build up inside of me, then I marched over to Darry's bedroom door and pushed it open. I was ready to fight for what I wanted, but the scene before my eyes quickly stopped the words of anger from leaving my mouth.

Darry sat on the edge of his bed weary and slumped over like an old man. Sodapop knelt at his feet, helping Darry to remove his shoes and get ready for bed. My two brothers looked up at me with exhaustion on their faces. A lump formed in my throat halting my attack. I wiped the remaining tears from my eyes.

Darry spoke up, "Make sure you get to bed early. If you are called to the witness stand tomorrow you are going to want to be well rested."

I looked to Darry and softly spoke, "The attorneys are going to call Owen before they call me. The told me that at Ashford."

"But if they don't you'll want to be ready." Darry told me with a tone of annoyance.

"Why wouldn't they call Owen first?" I questioned in argument.

Darry sighed heavily. "After your little spat today, Owen's not exactly seen as an ally by the court right now."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I snapped.

"Scout! Pay attention!" Darry snarled, "all those brains in your head and you can't see way the two of you fighting plays right into the defense attorney's lie?"

Sodapop rose to his feet and prepared himself to be the mediator if needed.

I furrowed my brow and my pent up frustration got the best of me. "Darry, you pay attention! We're not fighting anymore. He came here tonight to give you a job that will help bring Pony and me home and keep our family together. He told me he loved me, but you sent him away so I never got to tell him that I loved him too." Darry opened his mouth to speak, but I raised my voice to silence him. "You might be willing to live your life all alone, but I'm not! I need my family! I need my friends! I need to be with Ponyboy again, but even though Owen gave you a job to help bring us together, you don't want to see that happen. All you want is for me to be gone! I'll tell you what; if you ship me back to Ashford to stay until college, I promise you, I'll never come home again. I will be as dead to you then as if the Northside boys had killed me tonight. Think about that!" I yelled and then I stepped out of the room and slammed the door behind me.

My heart pounded in my chest. I wasn't proud that I had yelled at my brother, but the words were exactly how I felt. A few seconds later, I realized there was one other person who needed to know exactly how I felt and I planned to tell him immediately.

Knowing I had to move fast if I was to avoid getting caught leaving the house, I stormed over to the piano and pulled down a ceramic bowl that often held loose change. Inside, I found fifty-seven cents. That was more than enough for a round trip bus ride to the south side of town. I reached over and grabbed a hooded sweatshirt off of the back of a dining room chair then I unlocked the front door and slipped away from the house, unnoticed.

With a brisk pace I headed towards the bus stop by the steel warehouse. I wasn't sure of the time, so I had to guess by the level of twilight that surrounded me. I turned the corner and dumped my handful of change into the front pocket of my blue jeans. I zipped up the sweatshirt and noticed the sound of a car behind me. I sidestepped to my right and looked over my shoulder at the rusty car that pulled up beside me.

"Scout Curtis! Fancy seeing you back in the neighborhood. Rumor had it you were shipped away, never to return."

I looked through the passenger side window and smiled at Curly Sheppard who had pulled the car up to the curb. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves and walked over to the car. I casually rested my forearms on the windowsill of the car door and smiled. "Well that remains to be seen Curly, but I think it's more of a miracle seeing you around the neighborhood than me."

The boys in the car laughed along with the driver. Curly asked, "Where you headed?"

"To the bus stop by the steel warehouse. It's nice seeing you, but I've got to get going or I may miss my bus."

"Hold up!" Curly called out, "Save your nickel. I'll give you a ride, jump in."

I smiled graciously. "I don't know. I am headed all the way to the south side of town. I'd hate to have you go that far out of your way."

"Hop in," Curly told me again.

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Yeah, a hot looking babe like you can ride in my car anytime." Curly replied and pushed on his friend with the hair lip, Lou, who was sitting in the passenger seat. "Where are your manners? Get in the backseat and make room for the lady."

The lanky boy opened the car door for me then he scrambled over the seatback landing in the backseat next to the Weston brothers. I looked up and down the street for my brothers. They were nowhere in sight so I climbed into the car, shut the door and much to Curly's dismay I stayed on my half of the car seat.

"Why are you headed to the south side of Tulsa?" Jon Weston asked.

"To see her quarterback boyfriend, no doubt," Jon's brother answered him.

"He's a running back," I said simply.

"Running back, quarterback, doesn't matter, he's still a Soc," Jon said with an air of arrogance.

I didn't address the stereotype, neither did Curly as he asked, "So how's your brother, Ponyboy doing?"

"Not bad," I said, "he's been at Barrington Boys Home ever since… you know."

"Yeah, I heard that," Curly said, "and I heard you went off to some fancy school for rich girls?"

"Yeah," I answered with a sigh, "but it's not like I fit in there."

"Yeah, right!" Jon yelled out in disbelief, "You seem to fit in with the Socs just fine."

"Maybe I should, but I don't," I told him.

"How long you have to stay there?" Lou leaned forward in his seat and asked.

I rolled my eyes. "Not much longer, if I have anything to say about it."

"You got anything to say about it?" Jim Weston asked from the backseat as he puffed away on his cigarette.

"No," I said and looked out the passenger window.

"What's the problem?" Curly asked as he turned onto the highway that would take us south.

I looked over at him and thought about Two-Bit's demand, an eye for an eye. I knew if I told Curly about what had happened he and his thug friends would probably drive right into the Northside territory and go looking for a fight. In turn, that would give the Northside boys a reason to come looking for me, or someone else just to even the score, so I chose my words wisely. "Just a little family feud."

"Yeah, I can kind of see that. From what Ponyboy always said your brother Darry is really harsh on you and him." Curly informed me.

I shrugged my shoulders. I wasn't sure if I wanted to change that perception or not. My silence led to one of the Weston brothers changing the subject to something about a kid they knew who lifted a car and got away with it. I listened in and enjoyed hearing a story that wasn't about me.

As darkness fell upon the city, Curly followed my directions on how to navigate the unknown streets on the south side of town. I noticed the houses becoming larger and the cars parked in the driveways becoming fancier. I looked over at Curly and thought about the rust-bucket of a car we were traveling in. Being in the upper class territory could be bad news for a greaser, so I directed Curly to pull over blocks away from Owen's gated neighborhood.

"Right here?" Curly asked as he pulled the car to the curb and looked at the more than modest house he was in front of.

"This will do, I'll walk the rest of the way."

"Too embarrassed to be seen with us." Jim Weston growled.

"No," I clarified, "I just need sometime alone."

"You sure it safe for your to walk around these neighborhoods alone? You know, you being a greaser and all." Curly asked with true concern.

"Quit worrying about her," Jim Weston barked, "she's the frickin' winter queen of the Socs. Crimeminey, you got that picture from the newspaper taped on your damn wall! Them Socs aint gonna skin one of their own!"

I ignored Jim's assessment of me, and smiled politely at Curly to put his mind at ease. "I'll be fine. It's only a few blocks."

"Okay, suit yourself," Curly said with a slightly red face from his friends embarrassing comment.

I opened the car door and climbed out. "Thanks for the lift. It was good to see you again."

"No problem," Curly replied and he pulled the car back onto the road and headed out of the area.

Once I started walking towards Owen's house I began to question whether it was a good idea to stop by. After all, it was getting late, and it only crossed my mind now that he might not even be home. Then, like a bad omen, lightning cracked across the sky followed by a window rattling blast of thunder. In a moment, tiny raindrops began to fall. I quickened my steps. A second flash of lightening cracked through the clouds followed by a long roll of thunder and an unexpected flood of thick and heavy raindrops.

I rolled my eyes in disbelief, and hoped this wasn't a bad omen. I pulled the hood of my sweatshirt up over my head, and began sprinting down the street. At once point, the rain was so thick I actually missed the turn to the narrow road that snaked though Owen's neighborhood. By the time I reached the top of Owen's driveway there wasn't an inch of me that wasn't soaked. I started up the driveway and noticed that none of the lights in the house appeared to be on. I wondered if my trip was in vain, but then I spotted Owen's car parked in front of one of the garage doors.

Inhaling deeply, I climbed the stone stairs that led to he large, wooden, ornate doorway at the front of his house. Standing under the portico the rain was off of me, but the water ran from my clothes making large puddles at my feet. I stepped forward, rang the door buzzer, and then stepped back to wait. In the seconds that passed, I practiced in my head how I would greet Mr. or Mrs. Jasper if they opened the door. I wasn't sure how to explain why I was soaking wet on their front porch, so I hoped they wouldn't ask.

With the rain pounding on the ground I wasn't able to hear any movement inside the house, so I stepped forward to ring the buzzer again, but before I did the porch lamps lit up above my head. I stepped back again, heard the door lock turn, and watched as the wooden door swung open. I looked up at the person in the doorway.

"Scout?" Owen asked as he casually rested one hand on the knob of the door, "What are you doing here?"

It was an interesting question; because somehow I wasn't sure why I had even chose to come. I figured I would rush right over and Owen would welcome me with open arms, but instead I found him with the same aloof attitude he had in the courtroom. Confused, I searched my brain for another reason why I had come. "I… I wanted a chance to say thank you."

"Thank you, for what?"

"Thank you, for offering Darry that job. It means a lot to everyone, and I know you didn't have to do it."

"Like I said, I offered Darry the job because he's exactly the kind of guy we were looking for." Owen paused, stuffed his hands into the front pockets of his khaki pants, and stepped out onto the porch in his socks. He questioned, "Is there anything else?"

I looked down at the puddles I was leaving on the stone floor, nodded my head and looked back into the boy's eyes. "Yes…. Yes there is. I want you to know how sorry I am for all the trouble I've caused, and I want you to know, I love you too."

Owen pulled his strong hands out of the pockets of his pants. In one quick motion, he reached towards me, grabbed two fists full of my soaking wet sweatshirt from my chest, and pulled me towards him. He leaned in close and passionately kissed my lips. My knees nearly buckled with euphoria as my warm lips kissed his.

The boy finished with his kiss, exhaled in relief and told me, "you have no idea how hard it was for me today to be so mad at you and so in love with you at the same time."

"Pete told me you were pretty good at being stubborn," I said softly.

"Did he?" Owen said with a smirk.

"Yeah, and I'm glad he did because it almost tore me to pieces to see how badly I had hurt you." I shivered with cold.

Owen took notice of my chill. He let go of my wet sweatshirt, and ran his warm hands up and down the sides of my arms. "You must be freezing. Come on inside so we can dry you off." He pulled on my sweatshirt and I followed him into the warm home. Once inside the foyer, I watched Owen reach behind me and lock the front door, then I looked around and noticed how empty the home seemed to be. "Are your parents home?"

"No," Owen answered, "they left this morning with Oliva for their annual spring trip to Pocono Pennsylvania."

I furrowed my brow. "You have to testify in court this week and they left you behind to go on vacation?"

Owen flashed half a smile. "My lawyer is with me, so to them it's no big deal."

I shook my head in disappointment and shivered again.

"Scout, look what you did to yourself. You are soaked to the bone. We need to get you into some dry clothes or you'll surely catch pneumonia." Following his words, Owen stepped close to me and unzipped my sweatshirt. It had been so long since we had the opportunity to be so close and alone that our lust for one another amplified with every warm breath. As Owen pulled my soaking wet sweatshirt off of my shoulders he leaned in and kissed me again. I kissed him back and stepped out of my wet shoes. Then I pulled away from him for a moment to pull off my wet socks.

Owen took my hand in his and walked backwards towards the grand, walnut stairway inside his foyer. "Let's go find you something dry to put on."

I couldn't help but grin as I gazed into his blue eyes and allowed him to pull me along.

At the bottom of the stairway, Owen was still walking backwards as he lifted his foot to climb the stair and tripped. He fell backwards onto the steps with his hand in mine. Immediately, I lost my footing and tumbled onto his chest. Owen exhaled from the impact then the two of us laughed out loud.

"Nice tackle," Owen laughed.

"I didn't tackle you," I said in amusement, "you fumbled."

"I rarely fumble," Owen said with a grin and a well-timed kiss. When he was satisfied he stood up and pulled me to my feet. With my hand in his we climbed the remaining eight stairs to the large landing that housed an ornate stained glass window.

As the outdoor lights shown through, I noticed how wet I had made Owen's polo shirt as a result of our tumble. "Looks like I'm not the only one needing dry clothes."

The boy looked down at his damp shirt and looked back at me. "I guess you're right." Then he dropped my hand, pulled his shirt off over his head, and tossed it over the railing.

I gawked. The action caught me by surprise, and it was the first time I had ever seen Owen without his shirt on.

Owen reached over with his index finger and pushed upward on my chin to close my hanging jaw. He stepped towards me and with a warm breath in my ear he slowly searched for the bottom edge of my wet t-shirt. When he found it he slowly lifted it over my head. I allowed his advances towards me as I tried to contain the rush of emotions that surged through my body and yearned his affection. He then wrapped his long arms around my small frame and I felt the warm touch of his skin on mine. Owen held me close and whispered in my ear. "Are you warming up?"

All I could do was wonder what his intentions were, and mutter his name in question, "Owen?"

"It's okay, I'll take care of you." He softly said then he kissed my lips and ran his hands down my back to the back of my thighs. In a swift motion, he lifted me up. I continued to kiss his lips as I wrapped my legs around his waist and he carried me up the stairs and down the hall into his bedroom.

Gently, he lowered me onto his bed and I let my legs go loose. The two of us didn't speak and the sound of the heavy raindrops pounding on the window muffled our breath. Owen stood by the side of the bed, unsnapped my jeans and pulled down the zipper. Caringly, he pulled at the pants to remove them from my cold legs. He tossed them onto the floor, and laid his affectionate body on top of mine. We exchanged kisses as his hand rubbed my cool thigh.

I ran my fingers through his thick blond hair and rubbed my legs against his. Owen moved his lips to my neck. I let out a heavy sigh of satisfaction and raised my hip to rub against his. Owen then shifted his weight to the arm that had been warming my leg and with his newly free hand he ran his touch up my torso and gathered my covered breast in his hand. He squeezed the flesh firmly. I let out a small moan of approval as a large crack of lightning lit the room. Seconds later, the thunder rolled across the sky as Owen returned to my lips with a kiss.

As the lightning cracked again I heard a voice calling out in the distance. The thunder crashed again. I turned my head away from Owen's affections to question him. "Did you hear something?"

Owen lifted his head to listen, and then we both heard the voice call out, "Owen?"

Knowing someone was inside the house, Owen pushed himself off of the bed and turned to his dresser drawers.

"Who is it?" I asked as I sat up.

"Owen?" The boy's voice called again and we could tell he was coming to the second floor.

"It's Pete." Owen told me.

"How did he get in?"

"He knows where we hide the key."

"O!" Pete called out again. We knew he was coming down the hall to Owen's room.

My boyfriend yanked a long sleeve red rugby shirt from the dresser drawer and threw it my way. "Here, put this on." Then he darted for the bedroom door, slipped out, and pulled the door shut behind him.

I quickly pulled the shirt over my head and tip toed to the doorway to hear what was being said.

Pete responded to a question. "You said you'd call when you got back from seeing Darry. When you didn't, I started to wonder what was up."

"Oh yeah, sorry…um…I forgot," Owen replied.

"What's going on?" Pete asked with suspicion in his tone.

"Nothing. I was just getting ready for bed."

Pete must have sensed Owen wasn't being truthful as his loudly whispered he next question, "Don't tell me you've got a girl in there? O, what are you doing?"

"Nothing that you need to worry about," Owen spoke softly.

"Owen! Please tell me there isn't a girl in your room. I know how upset you are, but this isn't right. You know you love her. You two just need to forgive each other."

I stood on the other side of the door and knew it would be best to put Pete's mind at ease. As the lightning lit up the sky I grabbed my wet jeans and as the thunder rolled I opened the door. I slipped out into the hall and noticed Pete's eyes grow wide and his jaw drop open a little. "Hi, Pete."

A dirty little grin spread across Pete's face as he realized the troubles in his world were quickly mending themselves. "Scout, how nice to see you." 

"It's good to see you too." I said in a friendly voice, and slightly lifted the wet jeans for Pete to see. "I got caught in the rain coming here and I needed to get out of these wet clothes before I shivered to death."

"I bet," Pete said with playful doubt.

I stepped past Owen, looked at him and pointed down the hallway to the stairs. "I'm just going to run these down to the laundry room and throw them in the dryer for a spell."

"Okay, it's just off the kitchen." Owen said as he folded his strong arms across his naked chest with a smile.

I hustled down the hall and steps to the landing to gather my wet t-shirt before Pete could notice I didn't have it in my hand originally. Next, I let my curiosity get the best of me as I wondered what the two boys were talking about. I tip toed back up the steps, pressed my back against the wall, and listened in to the conversation.

"… he could start the job when Casey comes running into the house screaming, 'Scout's in trouble, these thugs got her and they won't let her go.' Then she tells Sodapop they've got switchblades."

"What?" Pete questioned in disbelief.

"I couldn't believe it either, so I ran out of the room and followed Two-Bit out the front door and there they were. This greaser kid was holding onto Scout, and he had his hand covering her mouth so she wouldn't scream or nothing and when I saw that it was like a switch went off. Instantly, I wasn't mad at her anymore, no matter what she had done or why didn't matter. All I wanted was to have her back."

"What did they want with her?"

"They were friends of James. They threatened her and told her to side with James in court or they were coming back to take care of her."

"What? Did you beat the tar out of the kid?"

"Nah uh. Two-Bit held me off. That guy may seem like a goofball, but he can be real serious and scary when he has to be. He pretty much threatened to kill the kid. You should have been there, Pete. It was insane. The thugs had knives, Sodapop had a switchblade and Two-Bit walked right up to the kid holding Scout and damn near slit the kid's throat."

"Was there a fight?"

"Not with the guys from the gang. They took Two-Bit's suggestion, let Scout go and got the hell out of there. I don't think they'll be back, but Darry does. It's odd to see, but he is really spooked about the whole thing. He told Scout that it isn't safe for her anymore in Tulsa. He said she's going back to Ashford and he's not letting her come back."

"What?"

Owen's voice grew softer, "I don't know what I am going to do. He's sending her back to Ashford for good. For forever." 

"What?" Pete asked in shock.

"Everything is such a mess. I don't know what to do. I just want everything to be like it was."

"Whoa," Pete said with a sigh, "I don't know, O."

"Come on, I want to go be sure Scout doesn't need any help."

Hearing that I knew I was sure to get caught eavesdropping. I hustled down the steps as quietly and quickly as I could. Once I was on the main floor, I was lost in the darkness and couldn't seem to find the light switches to guide me through the rooms. I picked up my wet socks from the foyer. A few seconds later, Owen and Peter were walking towards me.

"I couldn't find the light switches," I said.

The boys didn't question the accuracy of my statement. Owen reached into the dining room pushed in the light switch. He rested his hand on the small of my back and guided me along the path to the laundry room, which had been recently set up in an old kitchen pantry. Owen took my wet clothes from me and put them into the dryer, and then he grabbed a clean polo shirt off the stack of folded laundry and pulled the shirt over his head.

"Owen told me about what happened at your house tonight," Pete told me as he leaned against the doorway frame to the laundry room.

"Yeah, things didn't go to well," I said sadly.

"Do you think Darry will really make you stay at Ashford?" Pete asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Darry doesn't usually hesitate on his decisions."


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

Owen looked over at me as I sat in the passenger seat of his car. "Are you warm enough?"

My clothes were still damp from the rain, but the warm air from the car vents kept me comfortable. "I'm fine." I looked out the window and thought about my evening. One question had been nagging my mind. I didn't know how short my time would be in Tulsa, so I felt I needed an answer. I looked over at Owen as the passing headlamps lit his face. I quietly asked, "If Pete hadn't shown up do you think you … we … we would have, you know."

A bashful grin spread across his face and he kind of laughed out an answer. "I don't know."

That wasn't the answer I was looking for. I turned towards him and asked, "You don't know if you would have, or you don't know if you could have?"

Owen laughed again and questioned, "What do you mean?"

I paused a moment to try to figure out why it was a hard question for him to answer. A lot had happened in the past few weeks; I was wondering if I was assuming too much about the two of us. I rephrased my question. "I guess what I am asking is, are we still going steady or no?"

"Absolutely!" Owen looked towards me and his eyes sparkled. "Scout, you're my girl. Right?"

"Absolutely!" Relieved, I smiled back at him. "So, since we are still boyfriend and girlfriend, if Pete hadn't shown up do you think you would have?"

"Would have what?" Owen stared out the windshield and played stupid to aggravate me for his amusement.

Nervous for the answer I stumbled through the question. "Would we have, you know… gone all the way tonight?"

Owen's smile drifted away from his face and he stared straight ahead for a moment before he simply answered. "No." 

Upset, I looked out the passenger window before I softly inquired. "Why? Why her, and not me?"

"What?"

"Why did you have sex with Lacey Montgomery, but you wouldn't with me?"

"Scout, you're only fifteen years old!" Owen reached over and touched my hand with his. "It will happen for us, but I love you and I would never want to pressure you with that."

"What if I told you that I wouldn't feel pressured?"

Owen spoke with a disappointed sigh. "I have a feeling this has less to do with you and me and more to do with you and Lacey, doesn't it?"

I huffed. "Was it this hard of a decision when you and Lacey did it?"

"No! Besides she's older than you," Owen argued, "and she came to me. I wasn't planning on any of it."

"Yeah, right." I snorted in response.

"It's true! She offered it to me, and I guess in the moment I didn't have a good reason to say no." Owen looked over at me and the look on my face must have made him feel like he had to explain. "Here it is, every summer we vacation in the Carolinas at this resort. My parents have a bungalow there and for years her family has had one right across from ours. It's no secret that Lacey has always been 'into' me, so last summer, in the middle of the night I hear this sound. I opened my eyes to see Lacey crawling through my bedroom window in her silk robe. I asked her what she was doing. Then she crawled up onto me, said something about a late birthday present, and untied her robe. She was naked, and she came on to me."

Dumbfounded, I didn't know what to say. His fling with Lacey was really no different than the one I had with the rodeo cowboy that same summer, and I hadn't told Owen about him.

Owen looked over at me then grabbed my hand to assure me. "I promise, Scout, when it's our time it will have been worth the wait."

Jealous of Lacey, I pouted. "What if I'm done waiting?"

"You're only fifteen!" Owen stated again.

"What if I'm ready?"

Owen looked at me with a concern I hadn't seen before. "Scout, I love you and I want nothing more than to show you that in every possible way, but that is a big step."

"But it's only a matter of days and then I'll be gone from here for good. Life is too short, Owen."

He couldn't argue.

"I'm just saying I'm ready. When you're ready, I'm ready," I assured him.

"Believe me! I'm ready to be with you. I just don't think I'm ready for Darry to find out."

I grinned. "So this might be the best time, because in the state he's in I think I could take him."

The two of us laughed. Owen lovingly squeezed my hand, and I dropped the subject. Besides, I was in a heap of trouble as it was.

Owen pulled his car over outside of my house. I noticed the living room lights were on and in a moment the front door was pulled open. Sodapop stood in the doorway, hands shoved into the front pockets of his jeans, peering out at the car. I could tell he was mad, which was rare for Soda.

"I'll walk you up," Owen said softly. He then leaned towards me and gently kissed my lips. He got out of the car, walked around to my side and opened the car door. I slowly climbed out, and allowed Owen to stay close to me as we strolled together towards the house.

When I reached the bottom of the stairs Sodapop darted out the screen door. In a quiet, but angry voice he began to scold me. "Where the hell have you been? I've been worried sick about you. I didn't know whether to think you had wandered off on you own, or if someone had snagged you."

Owen and I reached the top of the stairs and stood in front of my brother. Stubbornly angry that he would insinuate he cared I sassed back, "What does it matter where I've been."

"What does it matter?" Sodapop shot back in anger, "Scout, you've been nothing but in harms way for the past month and you wonder what it matters? What if those punks had come back, or Darry had woke up and figured out you was missing?"

I looked coldly at Soda. "What does it matter? In a few days, I'll be back at Ashford, all alone, and you and Darry won't know where I've been or who I'm with or who has hunted me down until it's too late. So what's it matter now?" With that said, I told Owen I'd see him in the morning, and I brushed past my brother and walked into the house.

I didn't hear the words the boys on the porch exchanged, but I assumed Owen was filing Sodapop in on the details of how I had shown up unannounced, drenched from the rain. I was also sure he left out the details of how he had warmed me up. I smiled at the memory and headed to my room to slip on some dry clothes for pajamas.

I busied myself with hanging up an outfit for the next day. I was hoping most of the wrinkles would diminish over night. When that task was over I sat down on my bed and looked around my room, which used to be Casey's room, and Casey and my room, which used to be Darry's room, which used to be Soda and Darry's room. No doubt there was a lot of history within the walls. No matter how rotten the day had been I thought about how good it felt to be back in my home. I wasn't ready to be sent away for good.

Sodapop pushed my bedroom door open. Still angry, he marched in. "You shouldn't have done what you did tonight."

"Save the lecture for someone who cares." I barked and looked away.

"All we asked was for you to stay in the house where we could look after you."

"That's all? Because I vaguely remember being asked to pack up my life and move away."

"It's not like that and you know it."

"Do I?"

"Well you should!"

"Well I don't. You said it yourself, if we aint got each other then we aint got nothin'. Once you ship me back to Ashford that exactly what I'll have, nothing! No boyfriend, no friends, no Darry, no you and…no…" A large lump formed in my throat and threatened to choke my last words. "… no… Ponyboy."

Soda's eyes grew moist. "Scout, you have to understand…"

I looked away to wipe away a fresh set of tears, and cried out in interruption, "It's not fair!"

"It's not fair for us either! Do you know what it's like to worry about you like we do? Do you have any idea how much we really want you all home?" Then Sodapop's emotions outwitted his tough façade. The tears flowed. "No one in this world is as important to us and you and Ponyb…" his voice cracked.

I didn't have to see my brother to know how miserable he was truly feeling. I hated that! I peeked over and found Sodapop becoming crippled by guilt and sadness. I jumped off my bed and dove towards him with my arms wide open. Sodapop's body bounced off the wall with a thud and the two of us crumpled to the floor and bawled. I grabbed at my brother in pain and gathered fistfuls of his shirt into my hands. I wept, "please don't send me back there. I just want to be home. I've already lost so much; I can't lose all of my brothers too. Please, So, you have to talk to Darry. Tell him to let me stay, please!"

"I don't know what to do." Soda cried out loud. "Why's it all got to be this hard?"

____________________

I woke up before the alarm clock rang. I lifted Sodapop's arm off of my body and slid out of his bed. The sun pierced through the closed blinds and left small slits of bright sunlight against Ponyboy's bulletin board. A picture of Ponyboy and Johnny caught my eye. I leaned in and looked at my brother who was sitting on the front porch next to his friend. I remembered taking the photo only a year ago.

Before Sodapop left for work, I convinced him to give me enough money to buy a roll of film for my mother's camera. I stuffed the dollars into the front pocket of my worn out blue jeans and headed out the front door. I knew better than to walk alone, but I wasn't willing to wait for Ponyboy to walk with me. Besides, it was daylight and the drug store wasn't far from the other side of the park.

As I walked down the street towards Johnny's house I noticed pieces of broken beer bottles in his front yard. His parents fought hard, and often. That, no doubt, was the reason Johnny had slept over on our couch. I shook my head in disappointment at Johnny's parents poor behavior and turned to cut through the vacant lot.

"Hey!"

I heard a voice yell out. I looked across the lot to the area where the boys sat around the fire and shared bull sessions with each other. "Hey, Dallas." I shifted my direction and walked towards the boy. "Did you sleep out here last night?"

"I guess so," Dallas said, and then he laughed at himself.

"To drunk to make it all the way to our house?" I asked with a grin.

"Maybe, I don't remember." Dally stood up and rubbed his wild hair to calm it down then he brushed at his jeans and jean jacket to be sure his looked somewhat presentable. "Where ya headed?"

"Larsen's Pharmacy."

Dally stretched and squinted into the sun. "Perfect, eggs and bacon. Come on, my treat." Dallas grabbed the sleeve of my shirt and pulled me in the direction of the pharmacy like it was his idea to go there.

I didn't mind.

Dallas reached into his pocket and pulled out a cigarette box. "Your brothers working today?" When Dally noticed the box was vacant of cigarettes he tossed the empty box into the street.

"Yeah, they both work the morning shift." I jumped off the curb and picked up the trash Dally had thrown down. I heard Dallas laugh hard. I looked up at him. "It wouldn't kill you to just put this in a trash can."

"Nobody cares." Dally blew off my suggestion.

"I care. My mom would have cared."

"Yeah, she would have." Dallas found a pair of sunglasses in his coat pocket and slide them onto his face. "Things would be different if she were still around. Huh?"

I decided not to respond to what I considered to be a rhetorical question. Then in a somewhat rare moment Dally put his arm around my shoulder and gave me a little squeeze of affection. "That kid we beat up in the rumble aint been around in a while, right?"

"You mean, James?" I folded up the cigarette box and tucked it into my pocket so I could put it in the trash later.

"Yeah, that's the guy."

"No, I think he's history. I haven't seen or heard from him since the rumble."

Dallas grinned. "Nothing like a good rumble to let people know who's in charge."

"Yeah, right." I mumbled in slight disagreement.

We walked into the Pharmacy together. In the front of the building was the merchandise, and in the back a small lunch counter where a person could get a plate of eggs and bacon for fifty cents. It was by far the best breakfast deal in town.

As we sat down on two of the stools surrounding the counter, Dally looked over at me. "What did you come here to get anyway?"

"A roll of camera film," I answered and put my hand in my pocket to be sure I still had the money Soda had given me. I remembered the empty cigarette box I had stuffed in my other pocket. I pulled it out and laid it on the counter in front of me.

"Always the do-gooder, aint ya?" Dally looked at me then held his stare a few seconds and the edges of his mouth curled up into a smile. "Just like your ma."

I smiled back. I never minded being compared to her.

"Well aint you sweet." A girl's voice sang out with a southern drawl. "Bringin` your little sister to the diner for breakfast."

Dallas and I looked up to find a new waitress at the pharmacy diner. I looked over at Dally who let a sly smile creep across his face. "Now that she's getting older Sissy and I don't get a lot of time together, so I like to take her out for breakfast every now and then."

The waitress leaned on the lunch counter and cooed.

Dallas liked her so he continued with his sham. "We'll have two plates of bacon and eggs. Sissy, you want milk or orange juice to drink, how 'bout apple? Yeah, we'll have two apple juices too. She likes apple juice." Dallas tilted his head in my direction.

"Awe." The young waitress beamed and looked at me. "I bet he's the sweetest brother ever."

I looked over at Dallas. I raised my eyebrows and gave him a fake smile. "Actually, I've got three more a lot sweeter than him."

The waitress laughed, and winked at Dally. "I bet that aint true."

"If you two will excuse me, I'll be right back." I jumped off my stool and purchased the camera film I came for.

When I returned to the counter my breakfast was ready. Even though Dally spent most of his time flirting with the waitress and trying to get her phone number, I appreciated him coming to the pharmacy with me and buying my meal. As soon as I finished, I thanked Dallas and hopped off the stool to head for home. Dallas looked over at me and grabbed my arm. "Whoa, hold up. I'll walk with you." He picked the girl's phone number up from the counter and threw down a dollar and fifty cents. Dally looked towards the girl one last time, "I'll call ya!"

During our walk home Dallas pulled out a fresh pack of cigarettes. I looked at the pack and then up at him. "When did you buy those?" All Dallas did was smile. I knew he had lifted them from the pharmacy, but I didn't know when or how. I had to give him credit, he was almost as good as stealing things as Two-Bit was. It was a talent, and a shame.

At home, I pulled mom's camera out from the kitchen drawer. I sat down at the dining room table and tried to figure out how to load the film. I had never done it, and I had never paid attention. After a few failed attempts to get the film to wind up I let out an agitated sigh.

Dallas heard my frustration, so he pulled himself off of the couch and walked over to the dining room table. "Perfect grades in school, but ya can't even figure out how to load film into a camera?"

"I suppose you know how?"

Dally got cocky. "I suppose I can figure it out. Here, let me see that." Dallas snatched the camera and film from my hands. After studying all of the parts he put the film in the camera, wound the film, pointed the camera in my direction, and snapped a photo. He laughed. "Works like a charm."

I had to smile. "Thanks Dallas." I grabbed the camera from him and aimed it back in his direction. I tried to snap a photo, but the film hadn't been advanced so it wouldn't shoot.

Dallas laughed again. "Hey genius, ya gotta wind the film after every picture."

"I know," I said and wound the film tight. I walked out to the front porch and found Ponyboy and Johnny sitting in the sun sifting through comic books. "Say cheese!" I aimed the camera in their direction.

I pulled the picture off of the bulletin board to look at it more closely. It was a good picture. I missed both of them and seeing their smiles in the photograph broke my heart. I felt the frown form on my face, so I pinned the picture back where it was and went to my room to get ready for the long day ahead of me.

Once I was dressed I went to brush my teeth. I entered the dining room and saw Sodapop and Darry huddled in the bathroom. They were talking in low voices to avoid being heard. I paused and wondered if Sodapop was telling on me for leaving the night before.

Seeing that Darry was occupying the bathroom I headed to the living room to wait for my turn. Sodapop, wearing only a towel, took notice of me. He smiled at me, and stepped out of the bathroom to hide any clues as to what he and Darry had been discussing. "Good Morning, Scout."

I nodded my head and went to sit alone on the couch. My stomach was in knots.

Darry, dressed for court, stepped out of the bathroom and looked my way. "Come eat some breakfast!"

The two of us shared a questioning glare before I sighed heavily and pushed myself up off the couch. Without a word of agreement I walked to the kitchen. I grabbed the loaf of bread, jar of peanut butter, and a butter knife. I ambled over to our small kitchen table and flopped down onto the padded metal chair.

Darry hobbled into the room and leaned his cane against the stove to free up his hand. He grabbed the jug of milk and a jar of strawberry jam from the icebox. He cradled the items in the crook of his arm and grabbed a knife from the drawer then two glasses from the cabinet. He sat down, across the table from me. "Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches sound good for breakfast," he said in a friendly voice.

I didn't look up at him as I spread a blob of peanut butter on my slice of bread and folded it in two.

"Soda told me you and Owen made up last night." I swallowed hard and mentally prepped myself to be on the defense for my actions. I wondered again if Soda had tattled about how I had disobeyed. Darry continued, "I'm glad you two worked things out before you went back to Ashford. I think that was a good move. The jury will see that, and it's sure to weaken the defense's strategy."

My insides began to boil at the mention of Ashford and the trial. I stared at my sandwich. "Reuniting with Owen wasn't a strategy. We actually love each other."

Sodapop walked into the kitchen buttoning up his dress shirt.

Darry let out a little laugh. "Scout, you are too young to know what love is."

"Oh yeah?" I stood up and my chair darted out from underneath me. "Well, you're too stubborn to know what love is! That's why is so easy for you to just push everyone out of your life!"

"Scout!" Soda scolded and looked at me.

"Stay out of this Sodapop! You're probably just going to play both sides of the fence anyway. You'll tell me how much you want me around then you'll tell Darry he's making a good decision and you'll help me pack my bags." I stormed out of the kitchen, out of the house, and sat myself down on the porch steps to sulk.

The ride to the courthouse consisted of one thing, Darry lecturing me to pay attention to what was being said in the courtroom. I assured him several times that I planned too, but each time I said it I didn't think he was actually listening.

Inside the courthouse, we came off the elevator and I saw Owen, dressed in his dark suit, leaning against the wall. He smiled when he saw me. I skipped towards him and wrapped him in my arms in an overly sweet way. I was hoping Darry was watching and he would somehow feel guilty for wanting to tear the two of us apart. I turned to look at my brothers and found them making their way down the hall to the courtroom door. I didn't care, at least it gave Owen and I a few moments to be alone.

"Did you get in a lot of trouble after I left last night?" Owen whispered his question into my ear.

I answered quietly, "No. Soda was kind of mad, but he's a pushover. Darry was asleep, and I don't think Soda told him what I did."

Owen nodded his head and then I notice him wipe his palms on his pants. I could tell he was nervous about something this morning. "What is it?"

Owen shifted his weight then he looked at me a second and tucked a tuff of my hair behind my ear. "Scout, this morning I mentioned to my attorney about how you were hassled by those boys yesterday."

The hairs stood up on the back of my neck as I worried for the part of the conversation that made Owen so nervous.

Owen continued, "He told me what they did was witness tampering, and it's illegal."

I smiled quickly. "Of course it's illegal, but so is putting a knife to another person's throat. Things just happen that way in my neighborhood and nobody cares. Not even the law"

Owen raised his eyebrows. "Actually, my attorney did care."

My face dropped. "What do you mean?"

Then I heard Sodapop call out my name. I turned to see him hurriedly coming towards me. "Mr. Berta, one of the lawyers for the prosecution says he needs to talk with us right now." Sodapop looked up at Owen. "All of us."

Sodapop grabbed me by the hand and pulled me along to a small room on the opposite side of the hall from the courtroom. Inside, were a large wooden table and twelve wooden chairs. No doubt it was a jury deliberation room. I stepped in and saw Mr. Berta. He was a younger man, possibly in his early thirties and the second chair prosecution attorney. I felt like I knew him a little since he was the one who came to Ashford to speak to me before the trial. "Come in, sit down." He said.

Darry was already sitting in the room and he motioned for me to sit beside him. I walked over and sat by him as two police officers entered the room and shut the door behind them. I looked across the table at Owen, who had chosen to sit by his own attorney, and furrowed my brow to let him know I wasn't happy that he had ratted on me.

"We need to talk." Mr Berta told me, and the whirlwind morning began.


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter Thirty One**

As the questioning from the police investigator dragged on throughout the morning the tension between Darry and I grew. With every word said, we worried we get someone else from the gang in trouble; Sodapop with a switchblade, Steve with a piece of pipe, and Two-Bit with his intensity and threats. Every time the investigator asked clarifying questions about the actions of one of our friends Darry would give me a look. It was the kind of look that said, 'Now see what you've done?' Look, or no look I wasn't going to lie, and the investigator thanked me on several occasions for my honesty. All I could hope for was Soda and Owen were in the other room telling the truth too. As long as our stories matched we stood a better chance of everyone staying out of trouble.

Without a word, the investigating officer finally left the stuffy room to confer with his associate. Once the door swung shut, and Darry and I were alone, I threw my head back and declared, "I hate all of this!"

My protest unexpectedly triggered my brother's temper. Angered, he looked at me. "If you would just do what I told you, when I told you to do it, none of us would be here right now!"

Instinctively, I sat up in my chair and looked down in silence. There it was, no matter what Darry was always right. I hated that too.

My brother scolded me. "When are you gonna learn that I know what's best for you?"

"Like sending me away?" I shot back, "Don't worry Darry, I'll be gone forever soon enough!"

"There you go again!" Indignant, Darry snapped back, "Tell me Scout, what is so wrong with making sure you take advantage of a once in a lifetime opportunity to attend a prestigious school that none of us, not even mom and dad, could have gotten you into? Huh? How does that make me the bad guy?"

"Because you never asked me if I wanted it! Ashford is what you want. It's your once in a lifetime opportunity, not mine! Every thing I want is here in Tulsa."

"What? Owen?"

"No! See you don't get it! This isn't about a boy. It's about me! It's about finally having the chance to be better than you." I snapped back and watched the expression on Darry's face turn to disbelief. I shifted my body to face him. "It's about standing up for myself and making my own choices. It's about having friends at school, going to dances, and out for Cokes after the football game. Its' about other girls looking at me and wishing they were me, the way other guys had secretly wished they were you. It's about finally feeling like I fit in, because I'm not a sissy anymore!"

I couldn't tell if the look on Darry's face was shock, hurt, or remorse and I didn't really care.

Then the door swung open. The investigator poked his head into the room and declared, "You all are free to go. We'll call ya if we need anything else, or if we need ya all to come to the station to identify any of the boys. If Scout's gone by then we'll have one of the other boys do it."

Gone? Hearing the officer say it only further drove home the point that it was inevitable.

"Thank you, Officer." Darry said coolly.

I glared at my brother for his aloofness. I hated the casualness everyone seemed to take about me going back to Ashford. I didn't want to go and I didn't think it was fair that no one seemed to care about what I wanted.

Darry and I stood up from our chairs just as Sodapop bounded into the room. I think he could feel the tension in the air because his weak smile drifted away with his words. "How's it going?" When we didn't answer, he filled in the silence. "The cops say they have all the info they need."

Looking forward to getting away from Darry I pushed past Soda, and out the door. As I turned down the hall I met face to face with Owen. It was the first chance we had to talk since I stepped off the elevator in the morning. He looked at me with puppy dog eyes. "You're not mad at me, are you?"

I couldn't resist him. "No, I know what you did was right." I folded my arms across my chest and leaned up against the wall. My thoughts flashed to what he and Sodapop may have told the police. "Please tell me you and Soda told the truth."

"Yeah. We downplayed some stuff, but neither of us lied about anything."

"Good." I said softy and looked away as thoughts of the morning flashed through my mind.

Darry and Soda walked into the hallway. Soda looked to Owen. "Did you find out what's up with the trial?"

"Yes, the courtroom broke for lunch about five minutes ago." Owen cleared is throat. "There's a little diner across the street if you all want to join me for lunch, my treat."

Sodapop and I looked to our oldest brother for approval. Darry nodded his head. "Sure, that sounds fine."

Hearing permission from Darry, I thought about how I couldn't believe how happy I was to be back with him only a day ago, and now I couldn't wait to get away. I looked up at Owen. "Why don't we run ahead and get everyone's order placed."

Owen and the boys agreed. I was happy to head down the stairs and out of the courthouse away from my brothers.

At the diner, Owen and I sat in a booth in the window. He placed the order with the waitress then he turned to me. "Are you okay?"

"I don't know," I said with sad frustration, "I just don't understand why Darry wants me gone so badly. I wonder if he blames me for what happened to him."

"Scout, I don't think he feels that way." Owen tried to assure me.

"He just never understands anything from someone else's point of view."

Owen raised his eyebrows at me in question. "Do you understand all of this from his point of view?"

I looked at him with a cold stare.

"Seriously," Owen said, "Imagine if it were you and Ponyboy. If someone tried to kill him what would you do? Where would you want him to be if there was some place he could be away from danger?"

"So you're on his side?"

"No, I am just saying I understand how he is thinking. Trust me, I want you here in Tulsa more than anything, but you would be pretty safe at Ashford, and it's a great opportunity." Owen put his arm around my shoulder. "Darry is not wrong for wanting what's best for you."

For some reason, when Owen said it, attending Ashford made a lot more sense. "I know." I let out an exhausted sigh. "For the life of me, I don't understand how girls are so excited to leave their homes to go to Ashford."

"They're bred that way. For most of them it's their ultimate achievement." Owen said simply, "Plus, they have ten years to get ready, not ten minutes."

"I have no plans to make Ashford Academy my ultimate achievement!"

"That's what I love about you." Owen said with a grin.

A faint smile pierced my lips. I turned my head to notice Darry and Sodapop make their way across the street. Even though Darry had only been back on his feet a couple of days his speed and strength were increasing rapidly. I was impressed with his stubbornness to succeed, it took me a lot longer to recover after my weeks in the hospital. Then I remembered that same stubbornness would be sending me away to a boarding school for the remainder of my school years, robbing me of what I really wanted. I silently fumed all through lunch just thinking about my demise.

After lunch the four of us took a seat in the front row of the courtroom behind the prosecution. For a great deal of time, Mr. Berta and Mr. Poe, the lead prosecuting attorney, were in an intense and private conversation. I strained to hear their words, but they were very good at keeping their conversations to themselves.

Moments later the jury walked in and the courtroom rose for the Judge to enter.

"Please be seated." The Judge invited the courtroom to rest as he turned to the prosecution to resume the trial. "Mr. Poe, I trust you have sorted through things."

"Yes sir, we have." Mr. Poe stood up and responded.

I wondered what things they had to sort through. Perhaps it was about the possibility of witness tampering by James' friends. Then I noticed Mr. Berta lean back in his chair and turn his head to look at me with a gentle smile.

"Call your next witness." The Judge prompted the prosecution.

"Your Honor," Mr. Poe's voice rang out, "the prosecution calls Scout Marie Curtis to the stand."

All of a sudden it felt as if I was being asphyxiated by the sound of my own name. My heart began to beat heavily against the inside of my chest and the sound of the mutterings from the courtroom faded into silence. For what seemed like minutes I stared straight ahead in distress and wondered, how could I be next? I wasn't supposed to testify this soon. Fear struck my nerves because once I was done testifying the court was making arrangements for me to return to Ashford Academy, where by Darry's directions I would never return. I wasn't ready to be gone forever! I needed more time!

Visually, the room began to swirl then I felt a warm strong arm wrap itself around my shoulder. The arm gave a little shake and I heard its owner speak to me. "Scout, are you okay?"

I turned my head to the left to see my father looking down at me. "It's your turn now. Be good and just tell the truth. Everything is going to be okay." My vision cleared and I realized it was Darry pulling me through. His blue eyes communicated the confidence he had in me. "Go on up there."

Dutifully, I slowly rose to my feet.

Mr. Berta looked up at me with a smile. "Don't worry, Scout. You'll do just fine."

I smiled back to hide my fears and hoped that no one could notice how weak my knees were feeling and how bad my hands were trembling. By the time I reached the witness stand my eyes were wet with unfallen tears. I sat down in the witness chair and out of the corner of my eye I saw the judge look down at me and smile.

"Darling," the Judge said, "we are going to need you to stand up and take the oath."

Feeling stupid I stood back to my feet and noticed the bailiff standing before me with the Holy Bible held out in his hand. I quietly took the oath and then I took my seat in the padded wooden witness chair. I looked out at the people in the courtroom and felt sick to my stomach. All I could think about was going back to Ashford and never being with my brothers again. As Mr. Poe rose to his feet I wondered if I looked as pale as I felt.

Mr. Poe called out his first question from the prosecution table. "How are you doing, Scout?"

I nodded my head then let out a timid answer, "fine." I panicked a little that Mr. Poe would figure out that I had lied under oath. The truth was I wasn't fine. All I could think about was how unfair things had been for me since I got home, and how I may have to leave Tulsa earlier than I had assumed, and how many weeks it had been since I had seen Ponyboy and how many more weeks would pass before I could see him again, if ever.

Mr. Poe smiled politely. "Can you please state your full name for the record?"

I could barely speak. "Scout Marie Curtis." Saying the names nearly released all of the sorrow from inside my body. Then my lower lip protruded from my face and began to quiver.

The Judge looked down at me. "Don't be scared. All you need to do is tell the truth, but I'm going to need you to speak a little louder and in to the microphone there. Okay?" The Judge pointed to the microphone on the small ledge in front of me. "Take your time, and answer again when you are ready."

I nodded and wiped the tears of frustration from my eyes. He didn't know it, but I was angry, not scared. I used a few moments to take in some deep breaths. I looked to the jury and then to the people in the courtroom. I tried to look towards the front row behind the prosecution for support, but every time I did my heart began to break for my brother who wasn't there. Then I looked to the defense table. Sitting there in his jail clothes was James with his green eyes sparkling and a grin on his face.

Seeing his smug look made me more mad than upset. I loathed him for what he had done to my family and me. Darry was right. I had a job to do. James had to be punished for his behavior and the burden of proving his guilt rested on my shoulders. I cleared my throat and leaned forward in my chair to answer with confidence. "Scout Marie Curtis."


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter Thirty-Two

On the ride home from the courthouse Darry and Sodapop constantly complimented me for a job well done on the witness stand. I knew they were trying to help with their supportive words, but I was in no mood to be patronized.

"You did good," Darry told me for the sixth time since we left the courthouse.

"I know," I said somewhat unconsciously from the backseat. I was sitting behind Darry so he couldn't see my apprehension. I wasn't as confident in myself as Darry was. There was just too much on my mind and too much at stake for me to be over confident.

I laid my head back against the seat and looked out the car window. As Soda pulled the car up in front of our house my stomach turned at the sight of Two-Bit and Casey waiting on the porch. I worried Darry send them away again causing me even further guilt.

I sighed and climbed out of the backseat. Dutifully, I opened Darry's car door for him. My brother thanked me, and used his cane to give him the support he needed to climb out of the car. Two-Bit walked up to greet him.

"Hey Darry, how's it going?" Without waiting for an answer he spoke again. "Casey and I didn't think you'd mind if we came back today. If you're not cool with that just let us know and we'll go back to my mom's house or something." Two-Bit winked at me, and leaned on the open car door.

I held my breath, expecting the worst.

Darry looked down at him, "You two are welcome to stay."

"Good news," Two-Bit said dryly then he looked at me with a grin.

I smiled back.

Two-Bit pushed the car door that I was holding shut then he wrapped his arm around my shoulder. He kept his voice low to try to keep our conversation private. "How'd your day go?"

I wrung my hands together, and out of the corner of eye I noticed Sodapop take a keen interest in hearing my response to the question. "It was okay. In the morning Owen tipped his lawyer off about what happened yesterday with the Northside Boys. So we spent the morning talking with the cops."

"About what?"

"It's illegal to threaten a witness in a court case, and since they used force to pressure my to lie it's considered witness tampering. I think they are going to arrest those boys."

Two-Bit's eyes showed his deep concern. "Wonder how that's gonna sit with their gang?"

Sodapop walked over to join the conversation he was eaves dropping into. "It better sit just fine if they know what's good for them!"

"Damn straight!" Two-Bit supported his friend.

Steering clear of the rest of the conversation, I pulled myself out of Two-Bit's grip and walked toward the porch where Casey was holding the screen door open for Darry. She was wearing her waitress uniform and her long black hair was pulled into a tight ponytail. She seemed anxious to speak with me so I hurried up the steps.

Darry stopped in the doorway and looked back at me. "You get on in the house."

"I'll be fine on the porch." I stated to my brother's dismay.

Darry reached out, grabbed a handful of me, and pulled me through the doorway. I stumbled inside against my will. Once I was safely inside Darry sternly looked at me. "Thank you."

A variety of responses flashed through my mind. I opted to stay put and keep my mouth shut because Sodapop and Two-Bit had raced up into the house to be sure everything was alright, and Casey was still holding the door open.

I looked at Sodapop. "I want to call Ponyboy now."

"We will, but he can't receive calls until after six o'clock. Let's get ready for dinner and you can call him after we eat." Sodapop said.

Casey stepped into the living room and let the screen door slam shut behind her to help break up some of the growing sibling tension. She grabbed my hand to keep me from sassing back to my brother. "Come on, Scout. Let's go wash up." Then she pulled me with her to the bathroom.

Once the two of us were securely inside the little room she shut the wooden door with a slam and looked at me. "So, fill me in! What's going on? What happened after we left last night? Is Darry really making you go back to Ashford? He better not be! And what's about Owen? What's up with the two of you?"

Amidst my misery, her over enthusiastic rambling made me smile.

"What?" She asked with a laugh. She knew I found her scattered thoughts amusing. "I'm already late for work, so spill it!"

"Which part?" I asked with a soft laugh.

Casey paused and bit her lower lip while she thought. Her eyes popped up and met with mine. "Owen, what's going on with him?"

"Oh!" I smiled slyly. "That's a long story."

"What happened?"

"Well, Darry shooed him away before we had a chance to talk, so I snuck out last night and went to see him."

Casey's eyes grew wide. "You snuck out of the house and risked getting thumped by Darry?? I'm impressed. You're more of a rebel…"

I put my hands on my hips to protest her interruption. "Do you want to hear about it or not?"

"Yeah! Go, go, go."

I smiled. "It's official, we are definitely a couple."

"Oh my goodness, what did you two do?"

"I am not going to make up kiss and tell."

Casey gasped and grinned at me. "Oh, I am not worried. I know you well enough to know that you will eventually tell me everything. So, where is he?"

"He went to Gino's to pick up pizza for dinner. He'll be here soon."

"Awe, I won't get to see you two together! I have to leave for work." Casey said as she stomped her foot in disappointment. "I'm not surprised though, that you two mended things so quickly. That boy is absolutely crazy about you. I swear if you go back to Ashford forever, it will crush him. You don't think Darry was serious, do you?"

A knock pounded on the bathroom door before I could answer. Two-Bit's voice called through the wooden panels. "Casey, if you want a ride to work, let's go!"

Casey groaned in disappointment. "Ugh, I gotta go. Wait up for me and we'll talk tonight. Okay?"

"Okay." I answered.

Casey pulled the door open and headed off to work.

I took it upon myself to set the table, which was also a great excuse to avoid conversation with either of my brothers.

Two-Bit arrived back home at the same time as Owen arrived with dinner. The two of them each brought a pizza to the table, and we all sat down to eat.

The boys were all on their third slice when Sodapop looked across the table at me. "Eat your pizza."

"I am." I answered.

Soda smiled at me. "No you're just picking at it."

"What time did you say we could call, Pony?" I answered off topic.

"Six," Soda answered, rocked back on his chair, and looked at the clock in the kitchen. "Now ya got almost five minutes before we can call, so eat." Then he looked over at Darry who was looking at me.

I turned my head to follow Soda's gaze and stared back at Darry. I didn't like being stared at, especially by the man who was going to sure I never saw Ponyboy again. I pushed my plate out in front of me. "I want to call my brother."

Darry's lip tightened and I knew my defiance had made him mad.

Owen tried to reduce the growing tension. "Scout, by the time you finish that piece it will be time to call him."

I ignored his reasoning and kept my defiant eyes on Darry who held my stare a moment then reached for another piece of pizza.

"I take it this is the stubborn side of Scout you haven't seen much of." Two-Bit said to Owen. "It gets worse, back when Pony and Johnnycakes ran away she was so mad she didn't eat or speak for a week."

I looked over at Two-Bit to see his smile gearing up to meet with his joke. "Best week of my life!" He said with a laugh that brought a smile to the faces of Owen and Sodapop, but not Darry and me. We were different then them. We were both stubborn and preferred to stand our ground when we knew we were right.

Two-Bit looked over at me. "Come on Sissy, you gotta loosen up and laugh. Everything will be alright."

I shot Two-Bit a look of anger and he knew to quiet down. In a huff, I looked at Sodapop and asked. "Is it six yet?"

Soda dropped the smile from his face and his piece of pizza to his plate. "Just hold on a second. Let me get the number." Soda stood up from his chair and headed back to his room.

I walked into the living room and sat down in my mother's chair. I grabbed the phone, put it in my lap and waited. The other boys strolled into the living room and sat on the couch interested to share in the moment.

A minute later, Sodapop returned with a letter and handed it to me. I looked at the page and noticed it was written in Ponyboy's handwriting. I could tell by the tiny holes in the top corner of the page that Soda kept the letter pinned to his bulletin board in his bedroom. I looked down at the bottom of the page and saw where Ponyboy had written the phone number for Barrington Home for Boys.

Sodapop sat on the arm of the sofa and watched as I pulled the dial around and waited for the phone call to connect. My heart rate accelerated when a boy's voice answered on the other line.

"Barrington."

I grew more anxious. "May I please speak with Ponyboy Curtis?"

The voice on the other side told me to hold on a minute and he would fetch him for me. I gripped the phone receiver tight as the anticipation of hearing his voice built up inside me.

"This is Ponyboy." He answered in his raspy voice.

"Pony?" I asked in disbelief even though I clearly recognized his voice. "Ponyboy, is that really you?"

"Scout!" Ponyboy yelled out in excitement. "I can't believe it's you!"

"It's me!" I confirmed as I kept my eyes to the floor to avoid looking at the boys on the couch who were staring at me.

"How are you able to call me? I thought Ashford revoked your phone privileges until next week?"

"I'm not at Ashford. I'm at home."

"Home?" Ponyboy asked loudly in disbelief. "How? Why are you home?"

I took in a deep breath to try to steady my emotions, and filled him in. "The State picked me up on Monday to testify at James' trial."

"No way! I wish I were home. How is everything there? How's Darry doing? And Sodapop?"

"Soda's doing great and Darry is good too." I answered. I glanced in contempt at my oldest brother.

"How soon until he gets back to work so we can come home for good?"

I heard my twin ask about home and my eyes grew hot with tears and my throat tightened with heartache.

"Scout?" Ponyboy called for me when I didn't respond.

"Pon…" I started to speak, but my voice cracked in two. I stuttered in a deep breath to calm myself and restart. "Pony, something awful has happened."

"What? What's wrong?" Pony yelled out in alarm.

I sniffled, and my voice was shaky as I repeated myself. "When I go back to Ashford …I can't ever come back home."

"What are you talking about?" Pony asked and I could hear the desperation in his voice.

My voice cracked as I started to cry. "Ponyboy, I am so sorry. If I had know… Pony, I miss you so much."

"I miss you too, but I don't understand." Ponyboy could be heard starting to well up with tears.

I loathed myself for all the trouble I had caused and I found myself stricken with grief at the sound of Ponyboy's question. "I …I ruined everything…" I dropped the phone receiver away from my ear, crumpled in my mother's chair, and sobbed.

Ponyboy could be heard on the other end of the line crying and calling out my name.

Sodapop gently walked over to my side. He took the phone receiver in one hand and placed the other hand lovingly on my back to try to ease my pain. "Don't worry none, little sis. It's gonna be okay."

Infuriated by his ever-present optimism I lashed out at him like a shrew. "No it isn't!" I screamed at the top of my lungs and felt my hands begin to tremble with rage. "How can you just sit there and let this happen to me? How can you tear me apart from Ponyboy like that? I hate you! I hate you Sodapop Curtis!"

Without remorse for the emotional damage I may have caused I jumped to my feet and raced to my bedroom. Once inside I slammed the door shut with all of my might and locked it tight. My body pulsed as I panted with fury and realized the lock wasn't enough to keep everyone away, so I grabbed my dresser and with a strength I didn't normally have I pushed the heavy piece of furniture up against the door. Then to finish off the task I dragged my bed over and braced it up against the dresser. Once my fortress was complete I dove onto my bed, covered my head with my pillow and sobbed like I did that last time I realized I would never see a member of my family again.


	33. Chapter 33

Chapter Thirty-Three

I opened my eyes to the early morning sun. I stood up from my bed and noticed my bedroom door was still wedged shut. It appeared no one had bothered to come in to be sure I was okay, which was just the way I wanted it. I stretched and wiped the sleep from my eyes. Then I wondered about the possible wake of damage I may have caused with my temper tantrum. I hoped Darry hadn't freaked out and banished Two-Bit and Casey from the house again, or told Owen to go away and stay away. I gathered my stuff for court and quietly freed myself from my solitude.

Once I roamed through the house I realized everyone and everything looked to be at peace. I found Casey shacked up in Sodapop's bed with him and Two-Bit on the bed outside of Darry's room and Steve had obviously appeared late in the evening because he was fast asleep on the couch, which explained why Casey and Soda were together. Steve once shared a bed with Soda, but Sodapop is a snuggler, and when he threw his arm around Steve and held him close… well that was too much friendship for Steve!

When I was dressed and ready I left a note on the dining room table.

Waiting in the car. Ms. Curtis. I sat and fumed in the stuffy car for over and hour until my brothers emerged from the house ready to leave for the courthouse. None of us spoke to each other for the entire day. The tension between the three of us was so thick that my mind would sometimes wander during questioning and wonder if anyone else noticed the 'elephant' in the corner of the courtroom. Owen wasn't even there to help lighten things up because the prosecution told him that with the change of agenda he wouldn't be testifying until the next week, so they sent him back to school. The day was long with testimony. While on the stand I perfected a lengthy pause before answering the prosecution's questions. I spoke slowly in hopes that my days in Tulsa would drag on giving Sodapop the time to wise up and stick up for me. I needed him to change his mind about it not being safe for me in Tulsa. I needed him to tell Darry he was wrong to send me away, but until he did that I considered him to be my adversary.

Once the judge dismissed the courtroom for the day I had made up my mind that I had no desire to speak with my brothers or be with my brothers, and they didn't' appear to have anything to say to me either. Not even a 'good job' or 'well done'. I told myself I didn't care anyway. Instead I wanted my solitude to continue and in the elevator I made a plan in my head to get what I wanted.

We exited the courthouse together in silence with the 'elephant' in tow. Purposely, I lagged far behind the two young men, and when they turned to the right to go to the parking lot I silently turned to the right, walked briskly away, and abandoned them.

I imagined they didn't notice my absence until it was too late to hunt me down, or call out to me. I pretended that I didn't care about their feelings as I moved quickly down the city blocks on my way to my ultimate place of solitude, the public library.

__________________

It was dark and just before ten o'clock at night when I turned the street corner and headed down the block towards my house, books in hand. I noticed the living room and kitchen lights burned bright as I passed through the fence gate and up the porch steps.

I pulled open the screen door and stepped inside to find Casey and Two-Bit unusually soundless and staring at me from the sofa. Steve had stopped pacing to look at me.

"Scout!" He said and released a tense sigh of relief. He walked towards me cautiously. "Where'ya been all night? You missed dinner."

I pulled my books up to my chest and crossed my arms over top of them as I looked at him with suspicion. "I'll be sure to eat something before I go to bed."

Steve stepped closer to me. "What kind of books you got there?"

I pulled my books tighter to my chest to hide the titles with my forearms. "It doesn't matter."

Steve stepped even closer with an unexpected concern. "You know you can't go running off like that. A lot of people around here were worried 'bout you. Your brothers were real worried about you."

"I doubt that." I snapped then I noticed the solemn looks on the faces of my friends and knew I was wrong." I stepped past Steve and notice Sodapop leaning with his back against the kitchen doorframe where he appeared to have been in conversation with someone in the kitchen. I glared at my brother and held my grudge. He glared back with the intensity he usually showed before a fight. As I moved through the dining room he straightened up and charged towards me.

"Why'd you run off like that?" He asked as he approached.

I stopped just before the doorway to my old bedroom and answered in a snotty tone. "I didn't run off. I walked."

"You know what I mean," Soda snarled with a hint of annoyance.

I put all of my weight on my back foot, cocked my hip with bad attitude and defiantly stared at my brother. "What's it matter to you? In a week I'll be gone and able to walk wherever I want and you won't have a say about it! So where I go shouldn't concern you or your friends anymore! Just pretend I'm already gone!" I tried to push past my brother, but his temper flared.

Outraged at the situation Soda unexpectedly snapped. He reached up with both hands and shoved my body up against the wall near the bathroom door. The force of his actions jarred the library books from my grip and they fell to the floor with a thud and a thump. Sodapop pushed hard to keep me pinned against the wall as he screamed, "Stay put! Just stay put! I am so sick and tired of everyone leaving me! I can't take this anymore! Do you have any idea how hard all of this is for Darry and me? Do you?"

I stared wide-eyed at my brother in fear. I could tell by the look in his eye that he was as angry as he gets. I had seen the look before when he had to rescue me from a group of rotten mannered Socs.

"None of this is our fault! So quit blaming us for trying to protect you!" Sodapop continued to scream, but was interrupted by the sound of Darry's bedroom door knob turning. Then our brother emerged from the dimly lit room.

I watched as Darry slowly walked towards me without the assistance of his cane. Oddly, he smiled softly at me. "Hi, Scout. It's good to see you home. Where'd ya go this evening?"

The soft, caring look in his eyes distracted me from my anger, and I calmly answered, "The library."

Darry let out a little laugh. "Didn't figure to look there, but I guess we should have known better." I followed his gaze and noticed he was speaking to Owen who was quietly standing in the kitchen doorway where Sodapop had been.

The look on Owen's face was serious. "We looked everywhere else."

I frowned back at Owen while Sodapop kept me pinned to the wall.

Darry reached up with his hand and pulled Soda's hand off of my right shoulder. Soda took the cue, let me go and stepped back from me with his eyes on our brother.

A bit labored, Darry bent down and picked my two books up off the dining room floor.

"What did you get to read?" Darry stood up and read the titles of the books. Tactics of a Good Defense Attorney, How to Win with Reasonable Doubt. Darry's blue eyes connected with mine. "You worried?"

I shrugged my shoulders because I didn't know if I wanted to tell Darry that I was scared to death the defense would twist the truth and win.

"You know I only want what's best for you, right?" Darry collected the two books in one hand and looked me in the eye. "You know it's my job to raise you the rest of the way since mom and dad can't. It's just hard sometimes, because I'm not a dad, you know? But I'm trying. It's just that it's been such a hard year with all the trouble and such. I just want you to have the best. You've got to believe that."

I sniffled back the emotions I didn't want to show. I looked to Sodapop and knew he and Darry were still in agreement that I should be sent away. Furious, I grabbed my books out of Darry's hand and barked, "Whatever helps you sleep at night."

Then I pushed past him and sprinted to my room where I had to shimmy through the door because the dresser and bed were still sitting where I had left them. I pushed my door shut behind me and stood next to the window where my bed usually sat. Instantly, my arms fell limp and the books tumbled to the floor again. The truth burned inside of me, and I hated that Darry was right. It had been a hard year, and my brothers had probably suffered enough with the death of our parents, our friends and the trauma Ponyboy and I had put them through. I hung my head and sobbed so hard that I didn't hear the soft knock at the door or hear Owen slip into the room. It was only as he put his hand on my shoulder that I jumped away and knew he was there.

I wiped my eyes and looked at him as he looked back at me. He didn't speak, but I knew what he was saying.

"You agree with Darry, don't you?" I cried out.

Owen shrugged his shoulders and spoke softly, "He loves you, and if I had to go through what he has gone through in the last year I am not sure I would do it any differently."

"That's just great!" I threw my hands up and cried. "So everyone wants me gone."

"Nobody wants you gone!" Owen raised the level of his voice to subdue my irrational statement. "You know… all night long I've been asking myself. Would I do things any differently if I was Darry and you were Olivia? All I can tell myself is, probably not. In fact, if I knew of a way to get Olivia out of the house and away from my mother I would do it in a heartbeat. I know how Darry feels, because I am sick and tired of saving her too. I'm sick of having to worry about what is happening when I'm not home or having to jump in front of my mother's angry hand or a broom stick all because a seven year old little girl dripped ice cream on the concrete patio. I'm sick of hiding the bruises or listening to my sister cry in the middle of the night. She didn't ask to be my mother's bastard child, it's not her fault. So if I knew she could be sent away some place safe I'd do it in a heartbeat." Owen calmed down, and looked away from me. "So yeah, maybe I just want to know that you'll be safe, and maybe I agree with Darry more than I want to."

My jaw dropped and I stared back at Owen, who couldn't bring himself to look at me. My mind was screaming a dozen thoughts. My mouth opened, and shared just one. "So maybe you should go." I said coldly.

Owen looked back at me. He seemed wounded by my words. "You don't really mean that."

"Yes I do." I said curtly.

Owen paused a moment and looked at me as if he were studying me or trying to read my mind. Disappointed, he surrendered with out a fight. "Then perhaps I should."

Owen took a step forward, leaned over, and picked the library books up off of the floor. He stood up tall and handed the books to me. I accepted the items as Owen looked at me, his eyes wet with tears. "Just remember, everyone here tonight loves you. We are not your enemy, James is. So be sure to make him pay for everything he has done to all of us." Then Owen turned away and walked out of the room closing the door behind him.

My only reaction was to stand idle in confusion. My life seemed to be getting to where I didn't know up from down, or left from right. I hated that everything Owen said made sense, but no matter how I looked at the situation I couldn't imagine going back to Ashford and never living at home again. The thought of losing contact with everyone in my life who mattered to me only further stirred my temper. Looking to argue my point one more time with my brothers I left my room in a mood, but slowed in the hallway at the sound of Owen's voice arguing for me.

"…Oh shut up, Steve! What were you doing when you were fifteen years old? Probably skipping class and screwing off! I bet you hadn't heard a gun shot, or watched your friend die, or fought for your own life. And on top of it all I bet you never knew the stress and pressure of testifying at a trial in order to protect yourself and your family!" I didn't hear anyone argue with him even though he had left a pause in his rant for rebuttal. "Everyone here needs to just leave her alone and get off of her case because if she doesn't calm down and focus she could mess up in court and that animal will be back on the streets free to roam the city or the state! And if that happens no place will be safe for her. No place! All of us need to stop thinking of what they want from Scout and start figuring out what she needs from us! She shouldn't have to feel like she is so alone."

Owen waited a moment again for anyone to disagree with him, but no one responded. So he bid the group good night and walked out of the house. After the front door closed I heard the soft murmur of conversation and footsteps in the kitchen. I couldn't make out what was being said, but I was sure the conversation was about me. Frustrated, I dropped my gaze to the wooden floor beneath my feet. Before I could start a thought I heard the floor boards creak. I jerked my head up in surprise and found Two-Bit coming towards me.

He looked at me with his round eyes and spoke gently. "Hey Scout, can I get you something?"

I couldn't bring the words to my lips to tell him what I needed, but he already knew. He moved in close and gently wrapped his strong arms around me into a secure hold. I pressed my hands against his chest and laid my head on his shoulder. Then I sobbed as he held me in the dark hallway. It was just what I needed.


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter Thirty Four**

The next morning, before leaving for court, I cleverly disguised my library books with book jackets from the library shelf in our living room. I pushed the books into a paper bag and took them with me, and if there was time to read, I read. I was determined to keep the defense team from twisting the truth into lies, and to do that I need to know and understand their tactics.

All day, while on the witness stand, I watched the defense attorneys reactions after each of my answers. I tried to study their reactions so I could be prepared for their rebuttal in the coming days. Concentrating so much on the defensive lawyers sometimes threw me off task to the point of losing track of what I was trying to convey to the prosecution.

Darry made a point of scolding me during lunch for my lack of attention. I didn't bother to explain to him what I was trying to accomplish. I didn't figure he'd care. He proved me wrong at the end of the day when we walked out of the courthouse and he grabbed my hand and held it tightly in his.

At home I paced the floor waiting for the six o'clock hour to come so I could talk to Ponyboy. When I finally placed the call, all I could hear on the other line was an operator recording telling me that my call could not go through. Frustrated, I handed the receiver to Darry who listened to the message with a frown.

Outside a loud crack of thunder rumbled through the house. Everyone in the room looked at each other with a feeling of gloom. The sky darkened as the rain began to fall heavy on the roof. Worried about the weather Casey felt it best to turn on the evening news. All of us turned our attention to the report of deadly storms and twisters that had roared through the southern part of the state where Barrington stood.

"Oh lordy." Two Bit quietly murmured.

Devastated by the information I sat back on the couch. I looked up at Sodapop in shock because he seemed so calm. He stood in silence staring out the living room window at the storm. Seeing him so complacent triggered my temper because this time I didn't need him to be calm. I needed him to be distraught and desperate for his family to be together. I needed him to finally crack and demand Darry bring Ponyboy and I straight home from our schools, but he didn't.

Hoping to help, Owen walked over and sat down next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder to comfort me. "Don't worry, Scout. He'll be alright."

Like the rain outside the window my tears instantly began to fall onto my cheeks. I cried out, "How will we know? He's so far away."

Hearing my whimper, Darry stood up from my father's chair, walked off to the isolation of his bedroom and shut himself off from reality.

_________________________

My mind awoke first then my eyes popped open to the darkness of my bedroom. In seconds, my vision adjusted and revealed the silhouette of a man sitting on my bed with me. Horror shot through my nerves! I gasped out loud, sat up, and back away from the stranger until my back pressed against my headboard.

"You alright, Sissy?" Darry asked in alarm.

Upon hearing his voice I was able to relax, and wonder why he was in my room.

"Did you have another nightmare?" He asked as he reached past me and switched on my lamp.

"No," I answered, but I couldn't be certain because I didn't even know I had had a first nightmare let alone a second one. "Is that why you're in here? Did I have a nightmare?"

Darry let out a little snort like he often did when he couldn't believe something Ponyboy or I had said. "It always amazes me how you and Ponyboy can scare the dickens out of us by screaming at night, but you never ever hear yourself."

I looked down at my knees that were drawn up against my chest. I wondered if I was having nightmares because Ponyboy was having them too. Thinking of Ponyboy only depressed me more. I questioned my brother, "Do you think he is okay?"

Darry raised his eyebrows at me. "You'd know that better than I would. You and Pony have that kind of bond. So what do you think?"

I thought hard for a moment, but couldn't sense anything for sure. "I just don't know," I whimpered, "but shouldn't we know something by now? If it was bad wouldn't someone had called?"

"Yeah, we probably would have heard something by now."

"But we don't know for sure," I said softly.

"I know, Scout..." Darry's voice trailed off as his own thoughts ran through his head. He looked back at me. "But it's not the first time I have had to sit and worry about you or Ponyboy. For the past year I've done nothing but worry about losing one of you." Darry's lip tightened as he fought back tears. "Then yesterday, when we walked out of the courthouse and I looked behind me and you were gone…" Darry struggled to take in a steady breath. "At that moment, I realized that I have been so worried about losing you that I haven't been able to see the truth."

I couldn't help but stare at my brother in confusion. It wasn't often that he cried, and when he did I understood why, but this time was different, so I questioned, "What truth?"

"If you stay here in Tulsa something bad could happen and I might lose you forever, but if I send you back to Ashford I will lose you forever and I don't want that to happen." I don't want to lose you like that. I don't want you to hate me."

My heart ached instantly then my lip quivered and my defensive shell began to crack.

My brother wiped his tears and carried on, "You know, that first day you were back, I barely recognized you when you walked down the hallway towards me. Your hair was so short, and you seemed taller, and older." Darry's face grimaced to hold in his emotions. "You are just more grown up then I remembered. You're not the little sister I used to have to look out for. I know, now, that I have to trust you to make your own decisions, and I don't want to see you hurt anymore, especially by me.

"So what are you saying?"

Darry took in a deep breath to stop his whimpering, He looked at me through the dim light in the room with a faint smile. "I'm saying, I want you to have a chance at everything I had when I was fifteen, and if that means staying here in Tulsa then Soda and I will do what ever it takes to make that happen and keep you safe."

My sorrow filled eyes widened in astonishment. My mouth dropped open. "Really, do you really mean that?"

"With all my heart," Darry cried out.

In that moment I felt a huge rush of stress leave my mind. I scampered across my bed and wrapped my arms around Darry's neck. "I am so sorry for all the trouble I have caused you. I never meant to."

Darry squeezed his arms tightly around my body and the two of us bawled together. "I'm sorry too. I just couldn't stand to think of something bad happening to you again!"

_____________________

"Sissy…Come on, Sissy time to get up." Sodapop slowly shook my body.

My mind awakened to a throbbing headache. No doubt the stress, pressure, and worry were getting to me both physically and mentally.

"Come on, time to get ready to go." Sodapop shook me one last time.

I sat up and rubbed my forehead hoping to squelch the intense pain. "Have we heard anything about Ponyboy?"

"No, I tried calling this morning but the phone lines are still down," Soda said with a frown.

I looked at my brother and took a moment to study his face and posture. I could tell he was mentally in conflict through the absence of his usually carefree demeanor. "Did you talk to Darry this morning?"

"Yeah," He said with a disappointing sigh that forced a deep frown onto my face.

"You don't want me to come home. Do you?"

My brother leaned forward and stared down to the floor. "It's not that I don't want you home. It's just hard to explain."

His lack of enthusiasm perturbed me. "Well then, just give it to my straight."

"I guess I just loved that you were there." A crooked grin graced his face. "I loved walking through the neighborhood and knowing that I was the only guy with a sister smart enough to be going to a big time school like Ashford."

A proud smile jumped onto my face as I joked, "You're one of the only guys smart enough to be going to school in this neighborhood!"

Soda laughed at my joke before continuing to explain himself. "I also liked bragging about you when people came to the station, especially when the Socs came in. I loved knowing that their sisters probably dreamed of going to Ashford. I bet their sisters would love to have the choice to go there, but they can't and you can. That's something special!"

I nodded my head in thought. "Maybe that's why I don't like it there…because it wasn't my choice. Maybe if I had been given time to think about it and prepare it would have been better, but I didn't. Instead of appreciating the opportunity all I can think about is coming home and fixing the mess I made of everything."

"Sissy, you didn't make a mess of nothing!"

I didn't argue with him because I knew I was right, but I did want him to see how great it would be if Pony and I were home again. "After everything that's happened I just want us all to be together."

"Yeah, I can see that, because as much as I want you to be at Ashford I also want you home."

"I just don't fit in there, and right now I just want to be in a place where I fit in, and that place is here with all of you." I looked at Sodapop with puppy dog eyes.

My brother's lips curled up into his cheeks just before he wise cracked. "Whoever told you that you fit in around here?"

My mouth dropped open with fake astonishment. "Sodapop Curtis! You take that back!" I yelled just before I swung a handful of pillow out from behind my back and smacked my brother in the face.

Soda quickly snagged the pillow from my grip and retuned the gesture to side of my head. The force of the blow and pain in my head knocked me sideways onto my bed, but the smile never left my face. It was more moments like these that I looked forward to.

My brother threw the pillow on top of me and stood up. "Come on now, get ready or you're gonna be late."

"I will," I assure him as he walked out of the room. Truthfully, didn't care if I was late. Today was the day I would be questioned about every horrid detail of being attacked. Up on the stand in front of so many strangers I had to recall the evil way James glared at me. The way he grabbed me, spoke to me, strangled me, and stabbed my brother.

I wiped the final tears from my eyes.

"That's all Your Honor." The prosecuting attorney called out from his table.

The judge thought a moment then spoke to the court. "In consideration of the time, and it being the end of the work week I think it best if we call it a day and reconvene again, Monday morning at eight o'clock. Prosecution, please be prepared to call your next witness at that time."

The judge looked down at me and kindly smiled. "That's all for now, Ms. Curtis, you may step down."

I let out a soft sigh of relief and rose to my feet. I could feel my knees shaking beneath me as I glanced at the vicious stare on James usually smug face. I kept a watchful eye on him as I passed between the attorney's tables. James purposefully leaned back to keep his stare fixed upon me. I hurried my steps through the gate and back to my seat between my brothers.

"Bailiff, please escort the jury from the courtroom." The judge ordered.

Upon his command the jury rose to their feet and the bailiff walked them out of the courtroom and into their chambers. Once the room was cleared the judge slammed his gavel with a loud wooden crack and declared the court adjourned for the week.

I sat between my brothers and watched as the bailiff placed James into a set of handcuffs. As James was escorted from his seat he turned and smiled at me sending a chill up my spine. Now that Darry had given me the right to choose, somehow staying in Tulsa seemed more dangerous than it did before. On the walk out of the courthouse I wondered if I was stubbornly putting myself into harms way. Then my feet touched the sidewalk outside, and Darry's hand reached out and gripped mine tightly in his. I knew his intentions were to keep me close and to keep me safe. I squeezed his hand to let him know he wouldn't lose me.

On the ride home I sat in the front seat between my brothers. I kept quiet because my stomach felt sour and I didn't want to get sick. Soda tried to fill the silence talking about how happy he was the weekend was finally here, but he didn't have any plans other than spending time with Darry and me.

"How'bout that?" Soda asked me as he turned the car onto our street. "You think you can keep yourself away from Owen long enough to spend some time with me?"

His words were almost like whispers to me as my mind was chasing thoughts far away from reality. Then I sensed something, and I shared it out loud, "Ponyboy Curtis."

Darry looked at me with a frown. "What?"

I didn't answer him.

"Sissy, you okay?" Sodapop asked he slowed the car to park in front of our house.

"Ponyboy?" I asked softly to know one in particular. Then I strained to look past Darry and out the car window. On the porch I noticed Two-Bit leaning against a pillar, Casey stood near him with a wide grin of excitement. Owen sat on the bench under the living room window with a familiar boy sitting next to him. I screamed out, "Ponyboy!"

Ponyboy stood up from the bench and started towards the car.

"Ponyboy!" I yelled from inside the car. I couldn't contain my exhilaration as I tried to push my way out of the car past Darry, but when he couldn't move fast enough I dove over the seat to the back. I pulled up the lock knob and pushed the door open. I jumped out of the car. "Ponyboy!"

I met my brother on the sidewalk and the two us collided into each others arms.


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter Thirty Five**

I kept a tight grip on Ponyboy as Sodapop rushed up and squeezed his arms around the two of us. He seemed to release weeks of stress and worry as he hollered in delight, "Ponyboy, it's good to have you home!"

Soda and I loosened our grip on Ponyboy just a little to let Darry in to join the moment. Pony lifted his arms off of mine and Soda's shoulders to wrap them around our eldest brother. "Darry! I about worried my self sick about you. It is so good to see that you are okay!" Ponyboy clutched our brother in his arms and nuzzled his face into the crook of Darry's neck to keep from crying.

"I'm okay Ponyboy!" Darry assured him with a hug. "And I'm gonna try real hard to be sure everything stays okay."

Ponyboy pulled back from the hug and wiped his misty eyes. "Well… it's not going to be all okay if you send Scout back to Ashford forever. It just can't be okay that way!"

"I know." Darry looked at Pony with an assuring smile. "That's why I told her she can come home forever once the judge says its okay."

Ponyboy looked over at me with confusion. "But on the phone you said…"

I smiled back at him. "I did, but things have changed, and Darry is going to let us all be together again!" I looked at my twin and noticed the relieved look on his face then the two of us jumped together in a hug.

"I can't believe we are all back together again!" Pony cried out, "I was starting to think it would never happen."

Sodapop grabbed Ponyboy's shoulder and asked, "So what happened? How'd you get here?"

Pony turned to Sodapop. "It was the one of the scariest things ever! A huge twister barreled through the town. It ripped the roof off of our building and blew out all the windows. The place was destroyed in a minute. There was glass everywhere, clothes and shoes and bed sheets went flying across the common yard. There was no way anyone could stay there so anyone who had a decent place to go got to go. Anyone who couldn't go home had to move to a church on the outskirts of town, and there was no way I was sleeping in a church again. So I found Mr. Bowsley and asked him what he was going to do because I knew he was from Tulsa. He said he was coming here to spend the weekend with his family, so I asked permission to leave and hitched a ride."

"How many kids got to leave?" Soda asked.

"Not many, most of those boys aint got no one." Ponyboy told us.

"When do you have to go back?" I asked.

"I don't know. My Bowsley just said he'd give me a call on Sunday and let me know what the situation was like back at Barrington."

"Does Judge Carlson know you are here, or Mrs. Dillard?" Darry questioned with concern.

"I don't think so… and I don't intend to tell'em either."

Darry grinned a little and rubbed the top of Pony's greaseless head. "Don't worry little buddy, I don't either."

Two-Bit's voice called from the porch. "So ya'll gonna stand out there on the sidewalk all night flapping your gums or you gonna come inside to get a party started?"

Casey called out, "That's right it's party time! The Curtis family is back together!"

"I'll drink to that!" Two-Bit answered as Owen stood grinning by his side.

Sodapop looked at his siblings. "Come on, let's get inside. I'm starving anyway."

I giggled, and even though I was in a skirt I jumped up on Ponyboy's back to hitch a ride. "Let's go!"

"Scout, that's not very lady like." Soda laughed.

"That's okay, I'm not a lady yet."

My brothers laughed and we walked up on to the porch and the group funneled through the front door. Once inside the chatter amongst friends and family was amplified. I jumped off of my brother's back and took a moment to soak up the scene. Then Owen threw his arm across my shoulder and whispered into my ear. "Feeing better now?"

"Oh yeah! Like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders." I turned to look at Owen. "Who knew I would ever be thankful for tornados?"

Owen kissed the top of my head as I heard Sodapop call out my name from the kitchen.

I answered his beckoning and found him starring into the mostly empty cupboards. "I can't find nothing to make for dinner."

I poked around through the cabinets and asked, "When was the last time you went to the grocery store?"

"Couple weeks ago, I reckon."

"Well, I reckon we better make a trip to the grocery store."

"I reckon so." Soda smiled at me then he walked out to the dining room and announced, "Hey all! Scout and I got to run to the store to get some food for dinner."

"I'm going to stay here with Darry." Ponyboy told us from the couch were he was sitting next to our brother.

"I'm coming with you!" Casey yelled out.

"Me too," Owen said, "I'll drive."

"Where ya going? Over to my place?" Two-Bit asked Sodapop if he intended to go to the grocery store where Two-Bit worked.

"Yeah," Soda told him as he slipped on his shoes.

Two-Bit reached into his wallet and handed Sodapop some money. "They got cases of beer on sale in the back, pick up a few and just tell them they're for me. Uh, hold on, I'll write you a note." Then Two-Bit chuckled and grabbed a pen and paper.

"Hey!" Darry called out to Sodapop and handed over the fifty dollar bill I had given him days before. "Spend that money wisely. You hear?"

"Will do." Sodapop agreed as his stuffed the note from Two-Bit and the money into the front pocket of the dress pants he was still wearing. "Let's go!" He called out and the four of us headed out the front door to Owen's Camaro.

Owen looked at Sodapop and presented the keys to him. "If you want to drive I will ride with Scout in the back."

I noticed Sodapop's face light up. He used to write to me about how much he loved riding in Owen's car when Owen would give him a ride to or from the hospital or to run errands around town. To have the opportunity to drive it must have been a dream come true for my brother.

"Hell yeah!" Soda answered and swiped the keys from Owen's hand.

"Be nice." Owen warned.

Sodapop just laughed, but once he was in the car he settled down and even seemed to be concentrating on the experience. I took notice of how he held the steering wheel, sat back in the seat as if he owned the machine, and looked over at Casey with a huge grin. For the first time in a long time he was truly happy!

At the grocery store Owen helped me out of the backseat of the car and the building in the distance behind him grabbed my attention. I froze in my place as Owen closed the car door. Owen gave my hand a tug, but when I didn't budge he looked in the same direction as me. The two of us stared for a moment at the laundry mat where James had attacked me and stabbed my brother. Knowing I needed to move on my boyfriend nudged me from my spot. "Let's not think about that right now. We've got dinner to make and friends waiting."

I knew his was right, so I let him quietly escort me into the store where the other two were anxiously waiting.

Sodapop pushed a shopping cart in my direction. "Sissy, you and Owen get the healthy food for dinners and lunches while Casey and I pick up the beer and chips and fixings for chocolate cake."

"Okay, but remember what Darry said about the money," I said

"Sissy, you worry too much. If we go over we'll just tell'em to put it on ole Two-Bit's tab." Sodapop laughed at his own cleverness.

"Two-Bit aint got no tab." Casey said, "I already tried that once."

"How about this," Owen said, "why don't you two get what you really need and any cost over the money you have I'll pay for."

"Oh my gosh!" Casey clapped her hands and kissed Owen on the cheek. Then she looked at me and declared, "he is such a keeper!"

I watched Owen's cheeks turn red as Soda said he would get the meat from the butcher that we needed. Then he and Casey disappeared with their shopping cart to the back of the store. They were out of sight, but from time to time they could still be heard horsing around.

Owen and I set off in a different direction. We strolled through the aisles selecting food and were engulfed in a bit of private time discussing foods we didn't like and meals that we loved. He held my hand tightly and from time to time he would hold me back from being able to reach an item or two. We giggled and cooed with each other as if we were the only two people in the store. Then Owen turned the corner and crashed right into another young lady's cart. 

"I am so sorry!" Owen apologized to the lady and checked to be sure nothing was damaged.

I looked up at the girl and at first I just stared at her holding a blanket with a baby wrapped inside. Then I realized who she was. "Sandy?"

"Hi Scout." She said softly.

"What are you doing here?" I asked awkwardly as my thoughts drifted to Sodapop and what he was going to think if he saw her here.

Sandy cocked her head a little at the oddness of my question. "I came back to town a few weeks ago."

"Oh." I said absently.

A few uneasy seconds passed before Sandy spoke again, "You have a nice night."

Before I could respond I heard the sound of mayhem coming around the corner as Casey and Sodapop raced to find us.

"Hey ya'll! Found ya." Soda called out.

I looked over at my brother just in time to see his eyes connect with Sandy's eyes, and his mouth dropped open wider than I had ever seen it. Quietly he said, "Hey, Sandy."

"Hey Soda." She said back just as softly, "its good to see you again." Then the baby began to fuss a little and she shifted him in her arms.

"Is that your little one?" Sodapop asked.

"Yeah. You wanna hold him?"

Soda shrugged his shoulders, but couldn't pass up the opportunity to cuddle a newborn baby. "Sure."

I held my breath and wanted to pull Sodapop out of the store by his ear as Sandy grew closer to him and then laid the baby in his arms. I began to have a dreadful feeling as my brother slowly caressed the little face and cooed at the child.

Casey leaned in to look at the baby and then looked to Sandy. "He don't look much like you. Who's his daddy?"

"I thought I knew, but now I aint so sure." Sandy faintly smiled and looked at my brother, "In fact, Soda, I think he might be yours."

Soda's head jerked up to look at Sandy.

"Oh no, no, no!" I yelled out to ruin the moment. "No! No way is that Sodapop's baby."

Sandy looked at me with a furrowed brow as if I was foiling her evil plan.

I knew Soda wasn't over her and she must have known it too. I continued to rant. "Soda, you just hand that baby back and pretend this never happened. You're no more the father of that baby than I am!"

Soda frowned and began to study the baby's features. "But he does have dark hair like me."

"Soda! Almost all babies are born with dark hair," I stated.

"What about his blue eyes?" Soda asked.

"A lot of babies are born with blue eyes and the color changes later." I told him as my agitation grew.

Then Soda grinned and looked at me as if he was begging to bring home a puppy. "But he's adorable and I'm adorable."

"Sodapop Patrick Curtis!" I scolded loudly and didn't find the situation funny, "You hand that baby back to its mother and forget the two of you ever met. You weren't the father nine months ago and you are not the father now!"

"You don't know that!" Sandy shrieked, "Just because you're all smart and stuff don't mean you don't know that. He could be the baby's daddy just as much as the other guys."

My eyes widened in disgust and I knew I needed to save my brother from a big mistake. "You know what I think I know. I think you came back here to live happily ever after with the baby's real daddy and by the time you got here you realized he wasn't around anymore. Now you need someone to take care of you and pay your bills. You know Sodapop is working fulltime and making money so you want him to step in and fix your mistake. No siree bub! My brother doesn't work hard just to give his money to a girl who will never love him back." When I turned back to the group I notice Casey standing by my brother's side so I embellished the situation further. "Besides, he's already got a girlfriend, right Casey."

She looked at me a second and then caught on. "Oh yeah, right. Aint that right Sodapoppy?" Casey grabbed his arm and leaned into him then she looked to Sandy with a smile. "We're just like two peas in a pod, he and I. We go almost everywhere together. I visit him when he's working at the DX station, I cook his dinners for him, and I even live at his house. Besides, I agree with Scout. I think it's awful shady that you don't talk or write to Sodapop forever and now you think you want him to believe you. Well, he aint falling for it. Aint that right, Sugarplum?"

Soda smiled at Casey's antics, then he stared down at the little tot and I could tell he was falling in love with him. My brother softly cooed a question. "What if he is mine?"

"Then I'm gone forever." I blurted out.

Sodapop looked at me in question.

"If that's your little baby and Judge Carlson finds out there is no way he will ever let me come home again. So you better be real sure that's your child before you trade me in for him." I warned.

Sodapop seemed pause a moment before he looked over at Sandy. "You know, Scout here goes to Ashford Academy now. It's this real expensive school for the richest and smartest girls in the state and she gets to go there for free. She's way smarter then I'll ever be, and she's even going to college someday. Beings she so smart I suppose I ought to listen to her."

"But Soda," Sandy whimpered, "I aint got no one now."

My brother looked over at Sandy with great sincerity. "I told you I would have taken care of the two of you, no questions asked. I would have done that then, but a lot has changed and now I don't think I can. He's a real fine looking baby." Sodapop gently handed the infant back to its mother. "You take care, Sandy." Then Sodapop grabbed his shopping cart and walked away.

Behind me I heard Casey call out, "Wait up Sugarplum!" and she chased after my brother and grabbed his arm. "Let's get the party supplies and get on home!"

Stunned by my brother's actions I stood still a moment and stared at Sandy as her eyes filled with frustrated tears and her face held a look of devastation. No doubt she was in a tough spot. I did feel bad for her. No girl should ever be abandoned like that, but I was proud of Sodapop. It took a lot of strength for him to realize that she would never truly love him back.

Avoiding eye contact with me Sandy grabbed her shopping cart and pushed past me without a word.

Owen walked over to my side. "I think you're right. I think she was just looking for someone to get her out of the mess she is in."

"It's a shame she got herself into that mess to begin with."


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter Thirty Six**

Our impromptu welcome home party turned out to be a bigger event than anyone of us would have expected. Casey and Sodapop told the cashier at the grocery store about the event and by the end of the night the whole neighborhood had heard about it. Throughout the night almost everyone we knew had stopped by. Even Two-Bit's mama stopped by for a free beer, and to let us know there was no rush to send Two-Bit back home to live. She said we could keep him as long as we wanted.

By the early morning hours the party had simmered and then ceased. Owen had left, Kathyrn had tucked a happy, yet worn out, Darry into bed, and only those with toothbrushes in the bathroom remained amongst the mess.

"That was some party, huh?" Soda asked with a yawn and looked over at me as I was curled up in my mother's chair.

"Hell, yeah! Good thing people brought their own six packs of bub and stuff or we would have been the lamest party in town." Two-Bit happily agreed as he lounged in my father's chair. "Hey, I never got around to asking you. What did Steve think about the Sandy and baby situation?"

Sodapop sat on the couch and rubbed his hand hard against his forehead before answering. "He said he didn't think the little guy was mine. The way Sandy'd been talking to Evie it sounds like the kid's real dad said he was going to be there for them, but he isn't, so she's just looking for someone to take care of her."

Two-Bit looked at his friend with serious eyes. "You gonna?"

"Two months ago I'd have told you yes, but not now." Soda paused in thought. "I feel real awful for her, but Scout's right. I got more important people in my life to take care of. Aint that right, Ponyboy?" Soda asked our brother who was sitting next to him on the couch with his feet up on the coffee table.

"Yeah, you're right, and I am exhausted." Ponyboy said as he let his head fall onto Sodapop's shoulder.

"Why don't ya'll get on to bed, and I'll start cleaning up this mess?" Two-Bit suggested.

Soda, Pony, and I all looked at each other and laughed. It must be a pretty special day for Two-Bit to decide to clean a house, but we weren't going to argue.

"I'll stay up and help you." Casey, who was lying on the living room floor, said to Two-Bit.

"Sounds good." Two-Bit stood up from the chair. He began to pick up empty beer bottles and put them into a paper sack with a clink, clink sound.

"Keep it down though," Soda said as he stood up and stretched. "Darry really needs his sleep."

"Will do," Two-Bit said softly and was more delicate in putting the beer bottles into the paper sack.

Ponyboy stood up and offered a hand to Casey to help her off of the floor. She rose to her tired feet to begin helping Two-Bit.

Sodapop pulled me out of the chair and my brothers and I headed off to our bedrooms. After putting on my pajamas, I grabbed my blanket and pillow and hauled them over to Soda and Ponyboy's bedroom.

"Ya'll don't mind if I sleep on the floor in here, do you?" I asked. "I want to be near Ponyboy."

Soda grinned as he climbed in to his bed. "You don't have to sleep on the floor. You can squeeze in here with us on the bed."

"There's not a lot of room." I deduced as I watched Pony pull the covers over himself.

"So, who cares?" Sodapop asked even though he knew the answer. "We'll make room for ya. Get on up here in the middle."

I didn't hesitate in accepting his offer. Smack dab in the middle of my two favorite people sounded alright with me. I threw my blanket over top of Sodapop, and climbed in between my brothers. I nuzzled in under the blanket with Ponyboy, and fluffed my pillow before I laid my head onto it. "This is absolutely perfect!" I said with a sigh.

"Sure is. Stupid judge doesn't know what he's doing trying to keep us apart." Soda said as he wrapped his arm around me." When you grow up and become a judge be sure you're not a dope like Judge Carlson. Okay?"

I smiled. "I'll certainly try. At least I'll try to get to know a family better before I force them apart. Judge Carlson never even cared to try. I bet we could have all stayed together and things would have been okay. Then you wouldn't have had to take care of everything by yourself."

"I did okay." Sodapop said and lifted his head to look at our brother. "Pony, turn the light off and let's get to bed."

Ponyboy frowned at himself for not thinking to turn the light off by himself. He reached up, clicked off the lamp, and got cozy under the covers. The street light outside kept the room dimly lit. "That was some party. Huh?" Ponyboy echoed Soda's comment from earlier.

"I'll say," I answered him, "I never knew so many people cared whether we were together as a family or not."

"Well to be fair, some of them just came for the beer." Sodapop assured us. "Except for Curly Sheppard, he just kept asking me if you were single yet. I never knew that kid had the hots for you."

"Gross!" I laughed as I was packed like a sardine between my brothers. "I'd never consider dating him, not in a million years!" My brothers quickly laughed with me and then a hush fell across the room for a moment before I spoke again. "What do you two think about Kathryn and Darry?"

"What do you mean?" Ponyboy asked, he was never too observant.

"I mean, do you think they'll stay together this time?" I asked.

"Are they even officially together?" Pony asked.

"Soda?" I directed my brother to weigh in with his opinion.

Sodapop took in a deep sigh before speaking. "I don't know, but I do know that she was with him an awful lot at the hospital. Sometimes she cleaned the house or cooked for me. To tell you the truth I think she felt kind of guilty for what happened. With her calling Darry out of the laundry mat and all before James came in."

"It's not her fault. James is just pure evil!" I said

"True, but it's probably hard for her to see it that way." Soda assured me as we all laid in silence with our thoughts.

A moment later Ponyboy turned to his side to face me. He gently pulled at my hair. "Scout, Tell me again why you cut your hair off?"

I turned to look at him. "I didn't really have a reason. I guess I was just looking for a dramatic change in my life because things weren't going so well."

"Well that's pretty dramatic!" Ponyboy said.

"I like it. It really makes you look older," Sodapop added, "more grown up."

"It makes you look a lot more like Sodapop, that's why he likes it. I bet you could grease it back and you'd look more like his twin than mine." Ponyboy joked.

Sodapop fired back, "You're just jealous Mom and Dad gave us all the good looks. Aint that right, Scout."

"Yeah," I said with a sleepy sigh, "I sure do miss them."

"Me too." Ponyboy said.

"Me three." Sodapop said and rolled onto his back.

"You know the weirdest thing?" I asked.

"What's that?" Soda questioned.

"Sometimes I really miss, Dallas. When I was at Ashford dealing with those creepy girls all I wanted was for Dally to come to town and teach them a lesson or two."

Soda looked at me. "Dally wouldn't have ever hit a girl."

"From what I heard you did teach them a lesson." Ponyboy interrupted. "Sodapop told me you cracked one of them right in the nose."

"Yeah, but I swear I heard Dallas in the room egging me on to do it. Sometimes I wish I could be tougher like him."

"Scout, you don't want to be like Dally." Sodapop warned.

"I don't know about that." I said quietly. "I think Dally had an amazing way of never letting anything get to him. That's a talent that helps to keep you safe when you're in a place you don't want to be."

Sodapop propped his body up onto his elbow and looked down at me in the dim light. "Everything got to Dally. He just never had the courage to admit it."

"Soda's right." Pony added.

Sodapop explained himself. "Dallas may have seemed tough on the outside, but everything that hurt Dallas stayed bottled up inside of him till he couldn't handle it anymore.

That's not you, and it's not who you should be."

"You're stronger than Dally would have ever been," Ponyboy told me. "You're the toughest girl I know. You may be even tougher than Darry."

"I don't think she's tougher than Darry." Soda argued in jest.

"Well I don't mean stronger with muscles and stuff, I just mean stronger over all. No matter how bad the situation is we can always count on Scout to pull through."

"That's true," Soda added, "You can whether any storm. You're like a rock."

"I could never be strong with out all of you." I said and then paused in thought before I spoke again. "Ya ever stop to think about where we were a year ago?"

"Yeah, who would have thought those were the good ole days?" Ponyboy asked.

"What'da ya mean?" Sodapop asked.

"A year ago, our biggest problem was Mom and Dad being gone." I said, "and look at us now…"

Ponyboy finished my sentence for me, "…who'da thought it could be worse."

Sodapop laid back down on his back and pulled the blanket up under his chin. "A year ago, I fell in love with Sandy."

"A year ago, Owen didn't even know who I was." I said with a sigh.

"A year ago, we didn't even know who Casey was," Soda remarked.

"A year ago, Johnny and Dallas were still alive." Ponyboy added to the list.

"A year ago, I met James," I said with disappointment.

"I wish a year ago I didn't convince you to go on a date with him," Sodapop said.

"You couldn't have known how it would turn out. You were only trying to help," I consoled my brother so he wouldn't feel blame.

"Do you all wish we could go back to a year ago?" Ponyboy asked.

Sodapop and I answered in unison, "Yes!"

Then I began to doubt my decision. "Well, wait. If I go back a year can I still know what I know today?"

"No, that aint how it works," Ponyboy told me matter of fact.

"Then, no, I wouldn't go back, because I don't want to have to go through everything again," I told him.

Sodapop rolled towards me and asked, "Do you think you would have made all the same choices again?"

I laid on my back and looked at him. "If I didn't know better, I probably would.

Soda laid back on his back and stared up at the ceiling. "Yeah, good point."

"What if we could go back in time and warn ourselves about everything?" Ponyboy suggested.

I looked over at him. "If we could do that I'd go back and warn Mom and Dad about the train."

Ponyboy looked back at me. "Good point."

"What do you think the last year would have been like if they were alive?" I asked, sleepily.

"It would have been real nice." Sodapop said with a yawn.

"Yeah, it sure would have been." Ponyboy said as we all grew quiet and drifted off to sleep. 

* * *

Someone shook hard at my body, and I heard their voice saying, "Get up, Scout. Come on, you have got to get up."

I opened my eyes to find Owen dressed in a full suit, leaning across Sodapop and looking down at me. "Come on, I need you to join me for brunch today at the Country Club."

Still sleepy I sat up from my cramped space between my brothers. Owen reached across Sodapop and helped me out of the bed. I walked out into the hall with Owen, but I was still a bit disoriented to the task at hand.

"Hurry and get ready. I will go to your room and find you something to wear." I looked at

Owen with a questioning glace, but he prodded me down the hall to the bathroom. "Oh wait!" He commanded, then asked, "Where's your crown from the Winter Formal?"

"On my dresser. Why?"

"Cause you'll want to wear it to the brunch. You go get ready!"

Thoroughly confused I obediently walked through the kitchen and found Darry sitting at the table sipping a cup of coffee.

"Good morning, Darry," I greeted him and then walked over and gave him a quick hug. "Did Owen tell you why he needs me to go to brunch with him?"

"No, he just asked permission to take you."

I nodded my head. I was still confused, but I shuffled off to the bathroom to get ready. In my room Owen had woken Casey and the two of them pulled together an outfit for me, my crown, and my shoes. Then Owen sent Casey into the bathroom to help me get ready and hurry me along.

On the way to the Country Club Owen didn't tell me exactly why he wanted me with him. He did disclose that once a month the club hosts a 'shuffle brunch' where families are randomly paired up with other families to dine with each other. He usually skipped them, but he wanted to be there for this one. He also mentioned that he had me bring my crown along because it is customary at certain Club events for the Winter Formal King and Queen to wear them. I didn't question his customs.

Owen pulled the car up to the valet parking attendants and looked over at me. "Just remember, I love you." Then he leaned over and kissed my cheek.

"I love you too." I answered as the valet parking attendant on my side of the car opened the door for me. I stood up just in time to hear Owen talking to the other valet parking attendant on his side of the car.

"Thanks for everything, Chip. I really appreciate the heads up."

Then Owen spun his Winter Formal crown between his index fingers and placed the crown upon his blond head as he strolled over to greet me. "Are you ready?" He asked as he offered me his arm.

"I have no idea." I said as I felt silly with a crown upon my head in the late morning on a Saturday.

We walked inside and I quickly figured out that before a Shuffle Brunch all of the families meet in the gathering area to mingle with one another. We met up with Owen's parents and little sister, Olivia. As a pack we worked through the crowd. I was amazed as Owen's father greeted other men in a tycoon like fashion being sure to introduce his family and me to everyone we socialized with. Almost every lady commented on how adorable Owen and I were as King and Queen, and quite a few of the ladies recalled their own rein as Winter Formal Queen at the Club, and how they were selected by the King who later became their husband. Hearing that only made me blush when I though about Owen and I and the possible future.

"Good morning!" A voice boomed over the crowd as everyone began to hush. "Thank you to everyone for attending this month's Shuffle Brunch hosted by Dr. and Mrs. Schnauer. We hope you have your shuffle numbers ready because brunch is ready to be served!"

Following the announcement the four sets of ornate wooden double doors swung open and people began to file in to the large banquet hall.

I grabbed Owen's hand and noticed it was sweaty, the way is always was whenever he was nervous. I looked up at him. "Do we have a Shuffle number?"

"My father has it," Owen answered, "It's seventy two."

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"It means we are dining with another family who has the same number."

"Who is that?"

"You never know until you get to the table," Owen said with a smirk, "but I know the guy who helps assign the numbers, and I have it on good authority that we are dinging with a family you will want to impress."

"What?" I said and felt a panic rush over me.

Owen didn't answer me. He led me by the hand through the configuration of large round tables dressed in white linen, with white china, and crystal glassware till we arrived at table seventy two where another family was already waiting for us. I stood dumbfounded as Mr. Jasper greeted the fat, gray haired patriarchal leader of the other family. "Good morning, your Honor!"


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter Thirty Seven**

"Good morning, Mr. Jasper." Judge Carlson belted out a greeting. "You are sure looking good after a week of rest and relaxation in the Poconos."

I eyed Judge Carlson and held my breath. I wondered if would recognize me, and hoped Jonathan Jasper would forget to introduce me. I tried to make myself semi-invisible by standing halfway behind my date.

As the two men chit chatted and began to reintroduce their family members I looked up at Owen who had removed his crown and held it in his left arm. He looked down at me with a wide and proud grin.

"What were you thinking?" I whispered with a scowl and squeeze his hand tightly to let him feel how anrgy I was.

Owen simply smile at me with pride. "Trust me, and you can remove your crown now. Hold it in your left hand and the hostess will come to gather it before we dine."

I let go of Owen's hand and did as I was told. I turned my attention back to the introductions just in time to meet the Judge and his family.

"…And you know my son, Owen." Mr. Jasper told the Carlson family members as Owen stepped forward an shook hands with the men. Jonathan then turned the attention to me. "But I am not sure all of you have met his girlfriend, Miss Scout Curtis."

I watched as Judge Carlson's smile dimmed a bit and his look turned snooty and Judge Carlson simply said. "It is a pleasure to see you, Miss Curtis." Without embellishing that we had met before he began he introductions.". This is my wife, Maureen."

Inside my head I made a decision not to address the lady by her first name even though she had been introduced to me first. "It is a pleasure to meet you Mrs. Carlson."

"Same to you.". She said with a polite smile.

Judge Carlson continued introductions, but this time they were more for the group than just for me.

"You remember my oldest son Jeffery. Jeffery is in his final semester of law school at UC Berkley, and this is his new wife Judy."

Everyone greeted the couple.

Without embellishing that we had met before, Jusge Carlson continued, "and this is my younger son, Michael. He is a junior at Texas A & M. He is studying to be an engineer."

I greeted Michael, "hello, it is nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too," he said then he turned his attention to Owen. "Jasper, it's been awhile!". The two young men then shook hands and began a spirited conversation about high schol football as everyone took their seats.

Once we were seated Mr. Jasper leaned towards the Carlson family and announced. "You know Miss Curtis is an Ashford Academy girl and Club Winter Formal Queen."

"Those are wonderful accomplishments.". Mrs. Carlson told me.

Judge Carlson then looked across the table at me with a look of arrogance and stated. "Ashford Academy is a beautiful and time honored place, you should be so lucky as to be in attendance there amongst the state's elite."

I forced a smile.

"Judge Carlson," A voice called out from beyond our table, and I watched Mr. Ottavi approach the Judge.

Immediately I felt my stomach turn and I wished I could run and hide.

Mr. Ottavi spoke in a low voice "if you may, I was wondering if you could meet me after lunch in the Red Room. There is a certain case I would like to speak to you about as an urgent matter has surfaced."

The Judge grumbled a little and his wife, Maureen, spoke up. "Go right ahead, Ralph. I will be meeting the ladies for coffee and tea on the veranda after brunch."

"Alright then," Judge Carlson agreed. "I'll meet you there afterwards."

"Thank you, Your Honor." Mr. Ottavi then looked to the guests at the table. "Thank you for your time. Sorry to interrupt." He gazed around the table and his eyes widened when he saw me. "Miss Curtis, how are you today."

"Fine. Thank you." I replied quietly. Mr. Ottavi walked away as Owen reached over and squeezed my hand under the table to comfort me.

"So how long have you been at Ashford Academy?" Mrs. Carlson asked me.

I stared at her without a word and wondered how she could have no recolection of who I was.

"Just over a month." Owen replied for me and looked At me with a questioning smile.

"A month?" Jeffery Carlson looked at me and laughed. He sipped his Bloody Mary drink. "I thought all you Ashford girls were lifers."

"Not me," I said softly, and wished the conversation would change.

Jeffery Carlson looked over at me as the waitresses and waiters began to set serving bowls and plates of food on the tables. "So where did you go to school before Ashford?"

"Tulsa High School." I answered.

Jeffery questioned me, "Why would you go from Tulsa High to Ashford Academy in the middle of the semester?"

"Jeffery!" Judge Carlson sternly called out to his son. "That's enough about Ashford Academy. I don't want to have this conversation continue any further."

I looked at the judge with wide eyes and hoped that his son would follow his direction.

Jeffery laughed at his father and looked back to me and spoke on a casual tone. "The Judge and I have gone round and round about Ashford Academy lately. He thinks it is still the perfect school for any young lady, but I say it's simply a holding pen for flighty debutants. What say you, Miss Curtis?"

"I say…" I said and then paused a moment to form my response in my head before I spoke. "I say I was more academically challenged at Tulsa High and I would prefer to be back there."

"Then why don't you just go back?" Michael Carlson asked as he passed a bowl of green beans around the table.

"Because it's just not that simple!" Judge Carlson barked causing everyone at the table to look towards him in surprise.

Instantly I regretted speaking up. I down at my plate in fear of his repercussion.

Silence lingered for a moment as everyone looked aaround the table and began to connect the dots to form a picture they hadn't had all the pieces to before.

Jeffery looked at his father's aggitation and then he looked across the table at me and declared, "You're that girl!"

"Jeffery, leave it alone." Judge Carlson ordered sternly.

"She's that girl." Jeffery said with pleasure as he recalled past conversations with his father then he turned to his wife. "She's that girl whose parents passed away and the Judge thought it would be better if she was adopted to a new family then live with her older brother."

Jeffery's wife gasped in pity and looked at me with sincere eyes.

Her husband chuckled. "Oh wow, you wouldn't believe the arguments me and the old man have gotten into over your case."

Across the table from me Michael Carlson snapped his fingers loudly and pointed at me. "You're Darrell Curtis' little sister. Aren't you?"

"Michael! It's not polite to point." Maureen Carlson disciplined her adult son, and worried about her husband becoming more upset.

"Yeah, Darrell Curtis the football star! Man that guy could throw a football." Michael said, "I heard he was nearly stabbed to death somewhere on the north side. How's he doing?"

"He's great!" Owen said loudly with a proud smile. "He's been out of the hospital for week now, and we have hired him on full time as a grounds keeper!" Owen looked to Judge Carlson to be sure he was paying attention.

"The Judge sent you to Ashford didn't he?" Jeffery wouldn't let the conversation die. "He didn't think a few young hoodlums could raise a proper lady, isn't that right, Judge."

"Jeffery, I am not discussing work on the weekends!" Judge Carlson grumbled and seemed to be growing more aggitated.

Jeffery didn't fear his father as he laughed. "That's what we discussed on the weekend the last time I was in town!"

Mr. Jasper looked a bit confused by the conversation as he spoke. "Judge Carlson, with all due respect for your position, I think you are mistaken about Darry and the other boys. They are all very good boys."

The Judge's temper flared. "Jonathan, one of them is a high school drop out for Christ sake!"

"Ralph!" Maureen Carlson scolded her husband for his language.

"He may have dropped out, but he's not a detriment to society." Mr. Jasper attempted to reason with his friend. "He has a full time job and helps to take care of the family."

"They are orphans!" The Judge stated to Johnathan. "In this country, orphans who take care of other orphans are just a pack of vagabonds!"

"Judge, this is the 1960's for Christ sake!" Jeffery barked back at his father.

"Jeffery Michael Carlson, mind your language at the table." His mother scolded him hoping to subdue the ensuing argument.

Jeffery ignored his mother and continued as if I wasn't present to hear his conversation. "They aren't orphans they are a family. No doubt all they have in this world is each other and there is no doubt that is all they need! They belong together, and you need to wake up and smell the coffee because this world is changing fast and it's moving on without you!"

"Amen, Honey!" Jeffery's wife praised her man while Michael and Owen laughed out loud.

I looked up in a panic that all of the ridicule towards the Judge would forever secure my future at Ashford.

Jeffery noticed my fear and he leaned towards me. "Don't worry darling, as soon as I pass my bar exams this summer I'll come to town and be your lawyer. I know just how to beat that man!"

Everyone at the table laughed again, other than the Judge and me. I didn't have the courage to look at him, but I imagined he was staring at me and wanting me gone from his world sooner than later.

"Well, I guess that's what you get when you send one off to free thinking school like Berkley!" Maureen Carlson nervously sang out bringing more laughs and a more relaxed atmosphere for everyone at the table but me.

________________________

Owen and I grabbed our Winter Formal crowns and strolled out to the front of the County Club where the parking valet had the car waiting for us. Owen helped me into the car then  
Shut the door. I tapped my fingers on my knees in agitation as I waited for Owen to get into the car and pull away from the front of the building. When he did I turned to him. "You knew the whole time who we would be sitting with, didn't you?"

Owen just grinned.

"Have you lost your mind?" I shrieked. "What were you thinking? "

Owen laughed at me. "Scout, just calm down."

"Calm down? Are you kidding me? That man hates me!"

"He doesn't hate you," Owen said with a smile. "He just doesn't know you."

"Thats because he's rich and powerful and i'm poor and obsolete! There is no possible reason why he would want to know me."

"Scout, don't say that about yourself. You are not obsolete!"

"To him i am, and that is why you've lost your mind! I should have never been there."

"See, that's where you're wrong." Owen glanced over and noticed my look of confusion. "Before today he didn't know you or your brothers very well so it was easy to consider breaking you apart. Next time he sees you, he'll know you. He'll remember your manners and your smile. He'll remember all the great things my parents and I said about you and your brothers. His wife and sons will take a bigger interest in your case and then it will be a lot harder for him to be able to send you away."

"I don't know about that."

"I do," Owen said with confidence.

"How can you be sure?"

"You know how some things happen in your neighborhood that I don't understand and you tell me not to question it because that's just the way things are?"

"Sure."

"Well, that's just the way things work in my neighborhood. The Judge will have to answer to bis friends and family about decisions he makes in your case now. Dont worry, Things are going to be okay."

I looked at Owen with worry on my face.

"Trust me." Owen smiled back with confidence.

______________________________

Owen and I walked up the steps to my house hand in hand. I pulled the screen door open, and I could instantly feel the tension in the living room as Owen and I walked in. My attention was drawn to Darry who was sitting on a wooden dining room chair in the living room next to our social worker, Mrs. Dillard.

No one smiled.

Darry looked over and simply said, "We'll see you later, Owen."

Owen understood it was time to leave. He lightly squeezed my hand with a frown. "I'll see you later?" He looked at me with question in his eyes.

"Wait," I said softly, "I'll walk you out." I dropped my Winter Formal Crown down into my mother's chair, and quickly glanced over at Darry. He didn't argue with me, so I turned to walk out and noticed Sodapop and Ponyboy sitting solemnly on the sofa. I took notice that Pony had slicked his shortened hair with hair grease.

I stepped out onto the porch with Owen and let the screen door slam shut behind me.

Owen nervously licked his lips the way Ponyboy often did when he was unsure about a situation. "You'll call me later, right?" Owen asked softly.

I knew he was asking because neither of us knew what was going on inside the house.. "Yes, I'll call you… no matter what."

Owen looked at me a moment as if he was soaking up my image because he would never see me again. "I love you." He said quietly.

I cracked a little smile to comfort him. "I'm going to see you again." I said to calm my own nerves.

Owen leaned forward and gently grabbed my head in his hands and kissed my lips. When he finished the kiss he stepped away from me. "Call me later."

"I'll call you later." I said, and quietly waved goodbye.

Owen turned and walked back to his car. I turned and headed back into the house where all my brothers were right where I had left them.

"Have a seat." Darry said and gestured toward the sofa.

I walked over and sat down in between my brothers. I set my hands in my lap and wrung my fingers together to work off my nervous emotions.

Mrs. Dillard looked over and let out a sigh and a smile. "Well… no doubt this has been a very long month for the four of you. Hopefully Mr. Ottavi will be here soon with good news."

My eyes widened in surprise as I remembered Mr. Ottavi stopping by the table at brunch and asking to speak with the judge. I looked at Darry in fear.

He noticed my look, so he took the time to catch me up on the situation. "Mr. Dillard was contacted by Barrington about the building being destroyed and Ponyboy being home for the weekend."

Mrs. Dillard jumped into the conversation. "So I contacted Mr. Ottavi and he agreed to speak with Judge Carlson today and see if the judge will agree to a transfer of custody of the three of you from the State back to Darry see'ins how Darry is home now and feeling better and ready to start a new job soon."

My stomach turned leaving me with a sick feeling that must have shown on my newly pale face.

"Scout? Are you okay?" Darry leaned forward and asked me lightheartedly.

I didn't answer him as I let my gaze fall to the coffee table in from of me. I hoped the attention of everyone in the room would shift to something else then Sodapop elbowed me hard in the ribs.

"Whad'ya do that for?" I snapped loudly.

"Cause ya didn't answer the question." Sodapop smiled.

"Maybe I aint got nothing to say!" I snapped back, and then all of my brothers knew something was bothering me because my grammar was often poor when I was upset.

I wrung my hands together tightly and began to fear the worst. Sodapop leaned down to try to look into my eyes. He spoke softly, "hey, what's eating at you?"

Ponyboy put his hand on my shoulder to comfort me.

I dropped my face into my hands, but there was no avoiding the conversation. After a moment I took a deep breath and sat up. "I'm just really nervous about what the judge might think of me."

"What are you talking about?" Soda asked.

"Yeah?" Ponyboy looked at me in question. "He ain't going to think of you no different now than when he thought of you last time."

"Well …he ain't never thought much of me, and who knows what he'll be thinking now!" I barked.

"You're acting kind of weird," Soadapop noted.

"Scout?" Darry folded his arms across his slender chest and looked over at me. "Spill it. What's going on?"

Sometimes I hated how intuitive Darry could be. I frowned and spilled the beans. "At brunch today the Jasper family was seated at a table with another family who just happened to be the Carlson family."

"Who are the Carlsons?" Sodapop impulsively asked.

Darry shot him a look and Soda's eyes lit up as he realized who I was talking about. "Oh, continue."

I sighed, "As soon as I was introduced and everyone sat down the Judge's son, Jeffrey, recognized who I was. Right away he wanted to talk about my case and what I thought about the Judge sending me away to Ashford. I tried to avoid the conversation, but Jeffery just kept asking questions and disagreeing with everything his father had to say about us."

"What did Owen think of y'all having to sit with them?" Ponyboy asked.

"I think he knew who we were dining with before we got there. I think it was his plan all along because he and his dad talked a lot about how great Darry was and what a good family we are."

A car door slammed shut outside of our house interrupting my story. Soda, Pony, and I all turned our heads in unison to look out the window and see who had arrived.

I swallowed hard as Mr. Ottavi past through our gate and headed to the front door. I turned my head and looked at Darry with concern.

Darry ignored my emotion and nodded his head toward Ponyboy, who was sitting on the end of the sofa next to the front door. "Are you going to sit there, or are you going to let the man in?"

I watched as Pony looked back at Darry with a touch of defiance. "I guess that would depend on what he has to say, because last time he was here it didn't turn out so hot."

"Well, we won't know what he has to say until you open the door." Darry commented.

Ponboy and I looked at each other and shared a doubtful look that any of the news would be good.

Sodapop jumped up from the couch, crossed the living room, and opened the door for the visitor. "Good afternoon, Mr. Ottavi. Come on in."

"Good afternoon, Sodapop." Mr Ottavi greeted our brother and walked through the door with a handful of manila file folders stuffed full with papers.

I watched Darry stand up to shake the man's hand. Darry offered him the wooden chair next to Mrs. Dillard before he sat himself in dads chair by the phone.

Mr Ottawi sat down and looked at me with a smile. "Nice to see you again, Scout."

I forced a smile. "Nice to see you again too."

Mr. Ottavi looked around the room before he spoke. "I have some news today you are all going to be happy to hear." Then he lifted the top manila folder from the stack on his lap and read the index label, "Sodapop Patrick Curtis. Beginning this Monday you will be returned to the custody of your brother, Darrell."

Sodapop's eyes lit up in joy. "Seriously?"

"Yes Sir." Mr. Ottavi answered back with a smile.

Soda looked over at Darry with a grin and then back to our attorney. "What about Ponyboy and Scout? Do they get to come home too?"

Mr. Ottavi looked down to the stack of folders and pulled the middle one out. He read the index label, "Ponyboy Michael Curtis." Then he opened the folder and read from the paper inside. "Due to the recent destruction of the Barrington Home for Boys leaving Ponyboy without a suitable home or school his custody will be transferred from the State of Oklahoma to his brother, Darrell Curtis."

"Yes!" Ponyboy yelled out then he and Sodapop jumped up and hugged in front of me.

"Alright you two, sit down." Darry said after seeing my apprehension, but Ponyboy ran over and gave him a quick hug before he followed directions.

Sodapop sat back down on the left side of me and grabbed my left hand. Ponyboy sat back down on the right side of me and grabbed my right hand, and Darry asked, "How about, Scout."

Like the other times before Mr. Ottavi reached to his stack of manila folders and pulled out the thickest file in the bunch. He read the index tab, "Scout Marie Curtis." Then he opened the folder and paused a moment.

My heart sank.

"One thing everyone here needs to realize is that Judge Carlson truly has everyone's best interest at heart in this case."

I looked at Mr. Ottavi to assure him. "And it's in my best interest to return to the custody of my brother."

Mr. Ottavi looked back at me with a faint smile. "It's also in your best interest to be some where safe and away from harm."

"So, what are you saying?" Darry asked from the edge of his seat.

"The ruling at this time is that Scout is to return to Ashford Academy until..."

"What?" Sodapop yelped. "That's not fair!"

"Now Sodapop, just wait," Mrs. Dillard requested. "I don't think Mr. Ottavi was finished."

Ponyboy looked at me, nervously licked his lips, and squeezed my hand.

Mr. Ottavi continued, "Scout is to return to Ashford immediately following her testimony and until a verdict is found in the case against James Young."

"What does that have to do with us?"Soda blurted out, and Darry shushed him loudly.

Mr. Ottavi continued, "If James Young is found to be guilty and sentenced to prison for longer than four years Scout will return to the custody of her brother, Darrel and choose to remain at Ashford Academy or return to Tulsa."

"And what if he isn't found guilty?" Darry asked.

Mr. Ottavi sighed before responding. "If he is not found guilty and is released from custody Scout, for her own safety, will remain a Ward of the State until her eighteenth birthday. She will be required to complete her schooling at Ashford Academy, and then the State of Oklahoma will choose an appropriate college for her to attend at the cost of the State until her eighteenth birthday. During this time Scout will not be allowed to return to or reside in Tulsa County or any Oklahoma county where James Young also resides."

"That's not fair!" Ponyboy cried out.

Mr. Ottavi looked back at him. "I'd have to disagree. Both the Judge and I feel that your sister is a remarkable young lady and for either of us to allow her to return to a situation where she could be put in harms way, or worse, would be a gross error in judgment on our part."

"He's right," I said loud enough to be sure everyone could hear, and to keep anyone else from arguing. "At this point there's only one thing left to do."

"What's that?" Darry asked.

I looked over at Darry matter of fact. "I have to win


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter Thirty Eight

I licked my lips in an attempt to wet them, but I barely accomplished my goal as my mouth had grown dry from hours of questioning from the defense attorney. I looked into the courtroom crowd where Darry, Sodapop, and Owen were sitting in the front row. I sat up in my chair and wished Ponyboy could have been there, but Mrs. Dillard had to take him back to Barrington to collect his things and release him from the boys' home.

Across the room the tall, dark haired defense attorney peeked at his notes, and continued to attempt to weave together his fictitious tale. "Outside the diner, Owen Jasper demanded you stay in the car as he planned to confront Mr. Young. Is that correct?"

"Yes, Sir." I replied into the microphone.

"Then James Young demanded you get out of the car. Is that correct?"

I shifted my weight in the chair and answered, "Yes, Sir."

"Tell us, Miss Curtis, did you get out of the car."

"Yes, Sir, but only because James threatened to hurt Owen if I didn't get out."

The defense attorney glanced at the jury hoping they were following his line of questioning. The attorney turned back to me. "So you did as James Young asked you to."

"No, Sir…" I began.

The defense attorney interrupted, "but you stated that James Young ordered you to get out of the car. Isn't that correct?"

I took in a deep breath hoping to keep from becoming frustrated with the man. "_I chose_ to get out of the car because I hoped if I did James would go away without fuss."

"Because you didn't want James there."

"That is correct." I nodded my head.

"Because you didn't want Mr. Young and Owen Jasper to be in contact with each other?"

I furrowed my brow. "Because I was in fear that James planned to hurt Owen."

The attorney unbuttoned the jacket of his black suit coat and stuffed his left hand into the left pocket of his trousers. "The police were called to the scene, were they not?"

"They did arrive at the diner. That is when James ran away."

"Tell us, Miss Curtis, when the police officer asked if you would like to press charges against James for threatening you what did you say?"

I sighed heavy as I recalled my poor decision on that afternoon, "I said no."

"You stated in your testimony that you were in fear that my client planned to harm Owen Jasper, but when given the opportunity to have my client thrown in jail, at least for the night, you declined. Is this true?"

I tried to clarify the situation. "You don't understand. It's more complicated than that!"

"Isn't it true that you didn't press charges because you planned to meet up with James later that evening, and you two couldn't have done that if you were to have him arrested?"

I frowned at the suggestion. "That is not true!"

"So you are denying that you had plans to meet James for a romantic rendezvous that evening?"

"I can't deny something that isn't true. I would never make a date to be with James." I said and looked over at my empty water glass and wished it was full.

"Isn't it true that your older brother and legal guardian, Darrel Curtis, did not approve of James Young?"

"Objection," My attorney called out, "Hearsay!"

"Overruled," the Judge claimed and looked to the defense to ask his question again.

"Is it true that Darrel did not approve of James Young?"

"Upon occasion." I said slyly to try to avoid my answer being twisted by the defense.

"Darrel would not approve of you choosing to date James, would he?"

"_I_ would not approve of dating James Young." I stated defiantly.

"Miss Curtis, please answer the question. Yes or no, would your brother approve of you dating James Young?"

"No, he would not."

"This is precisely why you and James had to keep your relationship a secret. Isn't it?"

I looked across the room at Darry in time to see him shake his head in disgust. I remembered that he warned me that the defense was planning to create an entirely different scenario to discredit the truth. Angered I looked at the man and raised the level of my voice, "There was _no_ relationship, so there was _no_ secret!"

"Miss Curtis, have you ever kissed James Young on the lips?"

I answered, "yes, but that was a year ago!"

The attorney smiled at me. "Miss Curtis, did you and James ever drink alcohol together?"

Stunned by the question my lips parted as I considered how to answer. Again, I looked to Darry in the front row of the courtroom and felt defeated in knowing that my answer, although true, would disappoint him. I answered softly, "one time, over a year ago."

I watched Darry's eyes widen in surprise while he maintained composure.

The attorney smiled at my response, then continued with his line of questioning. "Tell us, did you and James kiss after illegally consuming the alcohol the two of you drank together?"

"Objection, asked and answered." Mr. Berta casually called out if only for a diversion.

The defense attorney looked to the Judge. "Your Honor, this question is relevant to the relationship in question between Miss Curtis and Mr. Young."

"I'll allow it." The Judge responded and sat back in his chair to wait for my answer.

"Miss Curtis," the defense attorney asked again, "did you and James kiss after illegally consuming the alcohol you admitted to sharing with him?"

I frowned and looked to the man. "Yes, but that was a year ago too."

"Tell us, after drinking the alcohol did you then lay on the sofa inside James' house and allow him to kiss you?"

I glanced over at James and noticed his grin as I answered, "Yes."

The defense attorney quickly asked, "Did you allow James Young to lay on top of you and kiss you?"

I furrowed my brow and tried to think ahead to what type of tale the attorney was attempting to weave. "Yes, but we both had all of our clothes on."

"So the two of you had been intimate before the moment in the laundry mat."

"If by intimate you mean kissing an insignificant boy on the sofa at his house a year ago, then yes."

"Isn't it true that you and James were intimate several times after that day?"

"No!"

"In fact, you and James were forced to keep your relationship a secret because of your brother's hatred toward James, weren't you?"

"There was _no_ relationship between James and me!"

The defense attorney raised his voice and began his barrage of questions to build his reasonable doubt. "When you got out of the car at the diner it was to tell James Young where to find you that night, wasn't it?"

"No! I didn't even know I would be at the laundry mat that night."

The defense attorney ignored my answer and continued, "That is why you didn't tell the police about him, you wanted to protect him. Isn't that true?"

"No! That is not true." I looked at the man, and then to Darry to see if he was becoming worried as to where the questioning was leading.

The defense attorney picked up his yellow legal pad, pretended to read, and then asked, "Miss Curtis, you like to play rough, don't you?"

"I beg your pardon?" I asked in repulsion.

"You play tackle football with boys, don't you?"

"Yes, upon occasion." I minimized.

"Tackle football can be kind of rough, can't it?"

"I suppose so."

"In your testimony about the alleged attack at the laundry mat you stated James pushed you to the ground and pulled your blouse open with one hand. Would you agree this is a rough way for a boy to treat a young girl?"

"Absolutely!"

"He then reached under your skirt and removed your undergarment all while holding a knife to your throat. Is that correct?"

"Yes."

"So you are stating that James Young is so strong that he was able to hold your body to the ground with only one hand?"

"No, Sir."

"No?" The attorney seemed pleasantly surprised by my answer, "Then why didn't you flee?"

"Fear." I simply said.

"Fear of what?"

"Fear that James would use his knife on me."

The man walked to the middle of the courtroom, and again he causally stuck one hand in the pocket of his slacks, and asked. "Did you believe at anytime during this moment that James Young had planned to kill you?"

I gave direct eye contact to the questioning attorney, and spoke into the microphone. "I believed it was possible."

"So, knowing you could possibly die you didn't fight back harder?"

"I did fight back. I fought and screamed as hard as I could. He was just too strong, and just to threatening."

The defense attorney threw out his hands in disbelief. "Did you ever try to cripple your 'so called' attacker by gouging out his eyes or biting him or stabbing him with the knife?"

"Objection, Your Honor, compound question." Mr. Berta called out from behind the prosecution table.

The Judge looked at my attorney. "Sustained."

"I'll rephrase, Your Honor". The defense attorney assured the Judge. He then looked to me. "Miss Curtis, while being attacked did you ever attempt to cripple James Young in defense of yourself?"

"I don't remember having the opportunity to do anything other than trying to keep him from removing anymore of my clothes, and avoiding being injured by his knife." I looked over at Sodapop and I could see the worry on his face as he listened intently to the cross examination.

"Did you ever consider gouging his eyes out with your fingers?"

"No, Sir."

"Did you consider trying to stab James with his own knife so you could get away from him?"

"No, Sir, I never saw a way I could get a hold of the knife."

"So you never considered permanently disabling James Young so he couldn't harm you any further?"

"I attempted to fight him off as best as I could."

"Really?" The defense attorney questioned me before I had finished my response. "Isn't the truth that you didn't really want to harm James Young because you truly care for him?"

"No!" I said with defiance.

"No, you don't care about him?"

"No."

"So you do care for him?"

"No... I mean, you're messing this all up."

"Objection, Your Honor, leading the witness." Mr. Berta called out.

"Sustained," the Judge responded.

The defense attorney regrouped his thoughts and began again. "Let me ask a clear yes or no question. Do you care at all about James Young?"

I sat back in the wooden witness chair and tried to determine where the question was headed. If I said no, was I a liar, because in actuality I did care for him in the capacity that most humans care somewhat for everyone. If I said yes, I would help the defense to solidify their story for reasonable doubt. I looked over at James who was staring directly at me then I threw my attention back to James' attorney. "I feel sad for him."

"Miss Curtis, it is a yes or no question. Do you care at all about James Young?"

I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly as I realized I was stepping into a rhetorical trap. I wanted to answer no, but I had already suggested a feeling toward the boy. Just before I was about to answer I was interrupted.

"Objection, ambiguous," Mr. Berta called out.

"Overruled, but I'll consider the question asked and answered by her previous response." The Judge ruled, and then he looked to his court reporter. "Ms. Swanson, could you please read back the witness's last answer."

The court reporter pulled at her ticker tape, read the answer, and repeated my words for the court. "I feel sad for him."

Without missing a step in his questioning the defense attorney continued to muddle the truth. "And are those feelings that you have for James Young also the reason why you didn't stop him from stabbing your brother?"

"Objection, Your Honor!" My attorney called out, "leading the witness!"

"Overruled, I'll allow the question." The Judge turned and looked down at me. "Please answer the question."

Defiantly, I snapped back an answer. "No! I couldn't stop him because James was trying to choke me to death. I couldn't breath enough to stop him, or I would have tried."

"Isn't it accurate to say that you truly care about James and you had suggested he meet you at the laundry mat when he approached you at the diner that afternoon?" I answered no, but the attorney continued so loudly and rapidly that my response could barely be heard over his rant. "It was you who wanted his affection and when your brother left the laundry mat James rushed in and in a moment of passion you begged for him to take you quickly and rough the way you liked to play boys?"

My lip began to quiver with rage as I shook my head in denial and muttered the word no.

The attorney ranted forth. "It was you who ripped open your blouse while James did as you asked and removed your panties in an attempt to satisfy your urges, and when your brother walked in you knew he would disapprove and James had no choice but to protect you from the sheer rage your brother was planning too unleash on you for your indecent behavior! Was it not?"

"No," I struggled to hold back my urge to sob, "None of that is true. Not a word of it."

James' attorney fell silent for a moment and wandered over closer to the jury. "Miss Curtis," he paused long enough to allow me to wipe my eyes and take better control of my anger. "Miss Curtis, are you a virgin?"

"Objection!" My attorney called out and stood up at his table. "There is no need for this kind of questioning."

"This is direct line of questioning as to Miss Curtis' personal character and desires that may have lead her to seduce my client and convince him to harm another man in her honor."

I looked to the Judge, who took a moment to think about the attorney's reasoning.

The Judge then responded out of my favor. "Although I am not personally in favor of the question, I must consider the current line of questioning. Taking into account the plausibility of your defense I'll have to allow it."

The courtroom filled with a soft mutter of astonishment.

The Judge smacked his gavel down hard on the sound block and called for order in the court. The people in the courtroom became silent and all eyes fell back upon me as the attorney repeated his question. "Miss Curtis, are you a virgin?"

My mouth dropped open I shock, but the truth hung in silence. Immediately, my eyes met up with the shocked expression on Sodapop's face. The two of us stared at each other. We both knew we were the only two people in the room who knew the truth to the question. I considered lying and wondered if Sodapop would ever forgive me. Then I imagined what would happen if they asked Sodapop the same question, or called anyone else in the gang to the witness stand to determine the truth. I knew I couldn't lie and force the rest of the gang to do the same. I knew that if I refused to answer I could be held in 'contempt of court' and I would probably never return to the custody of my family if I did so.

The defense attorney cued me to give an answer out loud and help him further establish reasonable doubt. "Miss Curtis, your answer please?"

My response was quiet, but heard by everyone. "No."

The room buzzed with chatter.

I looked over to Darry and noticed his head whip around toward Owen who was sitting on the other side of Sodapop. Owen seemed just as shocked by the news as Darry was.

I watched as Owen looked at my oldest brother and shook his head in denial. I could tell that Darry believed him as he looked back to me and then glanced at Sodapop and realized that Soda was not shocked by my answer, and that his little buddy had known the truth all along.

On the stand I wiped away tears and silently cursed myself out for being nothing more than a tramp then the questioning attorney grinned a little and turned towards the jury. "No further questions, Your Honor."

"Your Honor, redirect?" Mr. Berta called out from his seat.

I jerked my head up to look at him. I was sure I looked like a fool and I wasn't interested in answering any more questions.

"You may re-direct." The Judge responded.

Mr. Berta stood up and walked to the middle of the courtroom before starting his questioning. "Miss Curtis, have you ever had sexual intercourse with James Young?"

I wiped my eyes and cleared my throat before I answered, "'No, Sir."

"Tell me, how many times have you participated in the act of sexual intercourse?"

"Once." I answered and sniffled back my emotions.

"Do you love James Young."

I sat up and spoke clearly into the microphone. "No, I don't and I never have."

Mr. Berta flashed a smile at me in an attempt to comfort me. "Scout, do you love your brother, Darrel?"

"Yes I do," I felt my throat tighten as I lookers across the courtroom at my brother and clearly said, "with all my heart."

"Scout, would you ever want to see your brother, Darrel, hurt?"

"No, Sir, not in a million years." I answered with a faint smile, and swallowed hard to hold back my tears.

Mr. Berta stood silent a moment with a smile on his face the. He looked to the Judge and said, "That is all Your Honor."

The Judge looked across the courtroom at the defense table and asked, "Counsel?"

The defense attorney replied, "That is all Your Honor."

The Judge looked down at me, and I thought I was going to die of shame. Then he said. "Miss Curtis, you may step down."

I rose from the chair and my legs shook so badly I was sure everyone could see them. I walked across the courtroom and took a glance at James who called out, "I always knew you were my kind of girl!"

The Judge heard the comment. He banged his gavel on the plate and ordered James to sit quietly or return to jail.

James grinned.

I walked through the gate to the gallery seating and felt my stomach grow ill. All of my emotions squeezed my insides so hard that I could only put my hand to my mouth and walk briskly past my family and out of the courtroom. In the hallway, I headed straight for the steps as visions of how I had disappointed Darry, destroyed the case, and possibly ruined my relationship with Owen raced through my mind.

My feet rapidly descended the marble steps and I threw my body into the glass exit door to push it open and escape to the outside world. I walked along the sidewalk that lead to the parking lot and wiped tears from my cheeks.

I didn't hear the footsteps come up quickly from behind me and I jumped when I heard Owen's words. "Scout, wait up."

I stopped, but I was too ashamed to turn around and face him.

Owen stopped directly behind me. "Darry wanted to me to make sure you didn't run off."

Hearing my brother's name, I began to weep.

Owen looked around at the public who were watching him. Knowing better than to remain a spectacle he placed his hand on my back and lightly pushed me in the direction of the parking lot as he said, "Come on, let's wait by your car."

I walked alongside of my boyfriend and asked through me tears, "Are you mad?'

Owen shrugged a moment then answered. "Mad? No. Just … just surprised."

"I'm sorry." I cried out quietly.

Owen didn't say anything for a minute and when we reached our car he spun me around face him. I lowered my stare to the ground. Owen rested his hand on the car behind me, and seemed to wince in pain when he requested further information from me, "just tell me it wasn't with Jackson."

I looked up at the well dressed young man and answered with a frown, "It wasn't with Jackson. It wasn't even with someone I know."

Owen stepped close to me and wrapped me in his arms. He whispered to me, "Don't worry, Scout, it's all going to be alright."

"Scout!"

I recognized Darry's voice as he came close.

Owen let go of me and stepped away leaving me to face my brother on my own.

Darry walked right up to me. "Are you okay?"

Wide eyed I looked up at my brother and nodded.

Darry stepped to me and gathered me up into a tight hug. "You did good, Sissy. You did real good!"

After a moment, my brother let go and we looked up at each other. I waited for the scolding, but it never came. Instead, my brother smiled at me, tussled my short hair, and said, "Come on, let's go on home."

I looked over at Sodapop, and he calmly smiled at me before he climbed into the car.

I realized that there are some times in life when you just take a breath and move on from poor choices, and my brothers were allowing me to do that with this one. I smiled back at Sodapop and climbed into the front seat of the car.


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter Thirty Nine

Mrs. Dillard turned her car on to the long driveway leading to Ashford Academy.

In the backseat, my stomach rumbled, but I was too upset to consider eating.

Only fifteen hours earlier I was at home in Tulsa talking and having dinner with my brothers when the call came in to let me know the State had ordered me back to Ashford. I had only a few hours to pack, bid goodbye to my friends, and kiss my boyfriend goodnight for the last time in a long while. Now I was minutes away from the life I hated, that of an Ashford girl.

"Wow! Look at this place," Sodapop said in amazement as he extended his neck to see out the backseat window. "This is the stuff, Scout!"

I looked at my brother; who was dressed up in black slacks, a white dress shirt, and his used tan madras jacket, and I offered him a wide smile to hide my true displeasure for the school.

Soda didn't look back at me as he kept his gaze out the window. "So all these buildings are full of rich, good looking girls?"

His comment drew a smile on my face. "They're not all good looking." I answered and realized I saw the place as a prison and he saw it as a hobby farm.

Soda turned to me with an amused grin, and I was glad he was there with me. I wished my other brothers could have come to see Ashford Academy too, but Darry had to be in court in case Owen finished his testimony before the end of the day, and Mrs. Dillard dictated Ponyboy go to school, to please Judge Carlson and so he didn't fall behind in his classes.

My social worker pulled her car into a parking spot outside of the main building. She pulled the keys out of the ignition and turned to my brother. "Sodapop, would you be sure to get Scout's things from the trunk and I will meet the two of you inside at the Dean's office."

"Yes, Ma'am." Soda answered obediently.

The lady handed Sodapop the car keys, climbed out of the car, and hurried up the sidewalk to the main hall of the academy.

Soda and I looked at each other and wondered what her hurry was. Then we shared a laugh at the fact that the lady was probably hustling off to the bathroom.

While Sodapop fetched my luggage from the trunk I stepped up onto the sidewalk to wait for him. I pulled at the sweater to my Ashford Academy uniform and brushed at my skirt hoping to push out a few wrinkles.

"Welcome back, super woman!" A voice sang out and grabbed my attention.

I looked down the sidewalk to see Jackson Wesley coming at me with a welcoming grin.

The young man stepped close to me. He reached up and tapped his finger on the tip of my nose and playfully asked, "Rescue any one from a burning building while you were gone?"

I stepped back and smiled nervously trying to decipher how he knew that I had done that. I asked, "What do you mean?"

"There sure is a lot about you that you never told me." Jackson smiled, reached around to the back pocket of his coveralls and pulled out a rolled up newspaper. "You and me got a lot of talking to do down by the river now that your back!"

I began, "Jackson, I need…"

"Hi there," Sodapop interrupted as he stepped out from between the parked cars.

Jackson, surprised to find I wasn't alone quickly took a few steps back from me and replied, "Hello."

I looked back and forth at the two boys and then introduced them. "Sodapop, this is Jackson Wesley. Jackson, this is my brother Sodapop."

"Yeah, I could tell that by the name on his shirt," Sodapop wise cracked and pointed at Jackson's dark blue coveralls. "Nice to meet you."

Jackson seemed as if he already knew the young man was my brother. The handyman put the newspaper into his left hand and reached out with his right hand to greet Sodapop, "Nice to meet you too. I recognized you from your photograph in the paper here."

"What are you talking about?" I asked and peered at the periodical in Jackson's left hand.

"You are big news around here this week!" Jackson showed me the front page of the newspaper.

I quickly grabbed it from Jackson's grip, and read the headline to myself. Infuriated, I yelled out, "They weren't supposed to do this. I asked Mr. Fredricks not to write this!"

Jackson ignored my words and grabbed the Ashford Academy Journal from my hands. "Why not? It's a good story." He opened the paper and pointed. "See here, it has pictures of all of your brothers and even one of you and your ex-boyfriend at a dance or something. That oughtta get Lacey's undies in a bunch!" Jackson laughed.

I grimaced and exchanged a glance with my brother.

Jackson notices and questioned me, "What's up?"

I looked at Jackson. "Owen and I are still together."

Jackson looked back at me with disbelief. "What do you mean?"

"I mean the two of us never really broke up," I answered.

Jackson shifted his weigh as if he was preparing for a fight. "I don't understand. What about what he did to you, and coming up here to see Lacey and all?"

"It turns out that was all just a huge misunderstanding." I told the man.

"How so?" Jackson's attitude became heated as he stepped closer to me.

Sodapop sensed the growing tension and stepped between Jackson and I.

"It turns out I was wrong. He didn't come here to see her," I explained.

"But he took her to that dance! She had that photo!" Jackson stepped even closer to me to continue his argument.

Sodapop became protective and pressed his hand against Jackson's chest to move him away from me. "Hey, there's no need to argue about this. Owen is a good guy. So you oughtta just let this go."

Jackson stood silent in frustration for a few seconds then he folded up the newspaper. "That's just great." He muttered, then he turned on his heels and stormed back to his truck.

My brother and I watched as he pulled out of his parking spot and drove off to his next responsibility.

I heard Sodapop laugh a little. I turned to find him with a wide grin plastered across his face.

"Soda! I have really upset him!"

"I know," Soda said.

"So what do you find funny in all of this?"

"It seems Evie was right. You sure have turned out to be a heartbreaker," he said.

"I didn't mean for that to happen," I whined with a little guilt.

Soda let out humored sigh. "Ah yes, that's what all the heartbreakers say! Just another good reason for you to stay here at Ashford. You'll do a lot less damage here."

"I'm not staying here!" I proclaimed, "I'm coming home whether the judge likes it or not."

Soda paused a moment and looked at me with concern. He knew better than to get me riled up, especially since our time together was limited. He nudged me gently with his elbow then he hoisted the suitcase up off the ground. "Come on let's get on inside."

I followed my brother up the walkway to the main building.

"Hey, do you think I can get a copy of that newspaper Jackson had?" Sodapop asked as we climbed the stone steps to the main building.

"How am I supposed to know, I just got here." I answered in a huff and threw my hands up in the air.

Sodapop shrugged his shoulders as Mrs. Dillard came out of the front entrance and held the door open for us. I entered the building and noticed a stack of the school newspapers on a stand by the front door. I figure Soda could take a few home with him before he left. When all three of us stepped inside she quickly grabbed a newspaper from underneath her arm and showed the headline to me. "My, my, isn't this an exciting treat to come back to? You are the big news here this week."

"So I've heard," I said softly, but Mrs. Dillard didn't hear me as she had turned her attention to the Dean of Ashford Academy, Steven Donaldsen, who was approaching us from his office.

"Miss Curtis, welcome back to Ashford Academy," he said with a wide grin.

"It's a pleasure to be back." I graciously lied. "Dean Donaldsen, this is my brother, Sodapop."

The Dean smiled wide and greeted my brother. "Ah yes, Sodapop Curtis. Thanks to your picture on page three of the Ashford Academy Journal you are quite the teenage pin up celebrity around here."

Sodapop and I shared a questioning glance.

Mr. Donaldsen asked for the paper from Mrs. Dillard. She handed the paper over and he then turned through the pages.

"The girls in the journalism class say they had to make the picture this big because they didn't have enough type to fill the spread," Mr. Donaldsen said, "but after seeing more than a few of those pictures cut out around campus I am thinking the size of the picture may have been purposeful." The man lifted the paper up to expose the enlarged picture of Sodapop's yearbook photo reproduced on the page in black and white.

Sodapop looked at the photo and grinned with pride and appreciation of the affection.

Mr. Donaldsen refolded the newspaper and handed it back to my social worker. The Dean turned towards me. "Miss Curtis, the article speaks to all you've endured in the past year, much of which I was unaware of. It takes a great amount of strength and grace to survive all of that. You should be proud of yourself."

"We are all real proud of Scout!" Soda's voice sang out.

I blushed at hearing my brother's words.

"I'm sure you all are," Mr. Donaldsen said. "It is probably a rarity to find a girl as gifted as Scout in your neighborhood."

Neither Soda nor I responded.

Mr. Donaldsen then took a hold of my suitcase, that Sodapop had rested on the ground, and announced, "Well, Miss Curtis, let's go get you settled back in."

Outside we heard the noon bells chime signaling the afternoon break for lunch. The four of us walked out the front door of the building and headed towards the school's most prestigious dormitory, Covington House.

As we walked across the campus the common grounds between the buildings were quickly flooding with Ashford girls in their well tailored matching outfits.

I watched in amusement as Sodapop's head whipped from side to side as the girls past by.

Mrs. Dillard sniffed the aroma of food in the air, and remarked to start conversation. "I bet you are both ready for lunch after that long car ride!"

"I'm not hungry." I said slowly as I noticed many of the girls looking my way and whispering with their friends.

"I could eat." Soda said coolly as he flashed his charismatic smile at a group of girls who walked by and giggled at the attention he gave them.

IHis enjoyment of the situation made me smile.

We reached Covington House and Mr. Donaldsen opened the door to the dormitory. Miss Lemon was out for lunch, so the Dean pulled at the rope to ring the bell to announce that men had entered the building even though the dorm seemed completely vacant. As we climbed the stairs to my room I explained to Sodapop the rules and routines of the house.

Mr. Donaldsen opened the door to my room, but I led the way inside.

Sodapop followed behind me and his head swiveled around as he surveyed the area. "Wow, this is a big room, and it's nice that it is on the corner of the building so you have the extra window."

Mr. Donaldsen cleared his throat to get my attention.

Sodapop and I turned around to look at Mr. Donaldsen who was standing by the door with Mrs. Dillard.

Mr. Donaldsen said, "Miss Curtis, I want to welcome you back, but I expect your behavior to show improvement over the last time you were here."

"Yes Sir." I said with disappointment in myself, and frowned as I noticed the look of question on the face of my social worker. She obviously knew nothing of my wild ways here on campus.

"I am certain you will." Mr. Donaldsen said with confidence.

Sodapop reached out and rested his strong hand on my shoulder to let me know he was confident in me too.

"Everyone is invited to lunch in the dining hall before you leave." The Dean said then he turned to his right. "Mrs. Dillard, could I speak to you downstairs for a moment?"

"Certainly," She replied and looked towards my brother and I. "You two get Scout settled in and then I will meet you downstairs and we will go to lunch." Then Mrs. Dillard smiled and followed the Dean out of the room and shut the door behind her.

"I bet he is going to tell her about my socking Lacey in the mouth."

"Don't let it worry you. It ain't no big thing," Soda assured me then he wandered further into the room and grabbed a newly framed picture off of Lacey's night stand. He studied it for a moment and then he turned to me. He presented the picture. "Is this the photo that started all the fuss between you and Owen?"

"Yeah, that's the one." I said and noticed the fresh copy of the Ashford Academy Journal on my bed.

Soda laughed and looked at the photo again. "I don't see why you got so mad, he's not even happy in this picture."

I looked at my brother and walked over to take a closer look. "What are you talking about, he's smiling isn't he?"

"He's smiling, but not like he smiles when he's with you."

I felt myself blush and asked, "What do you mean?"

Soda stared at the picture and answered. "It's just different when he looks at you. There's like a sparkle or something." Soda noticed how his words seemed silly. "Just trust me, when he's with you and he smiles, you can tell how much he really loves you."

My smile spread across my face. "Don't let Darry hear you say that. According to him we're both to young to be in love."

Soda looked at me. "Yeah, well, just 'cause he's the oldest doesn't always mean he's right."

I laughed and noticed a note taped to the front of the newspaper. I sat down on my bed and pulled the note off to read it.

_Miss Curtis, _

_What a wonderful tale of strength and courage. I would not have expected less from a wise and caring young lady like yourself. _

_Welcome back to Ashford, _

_Miss Lemon  
_  
Soda tossed the picture frame face down onto Lacey's bed then he stepped back and flopped down onto my bed. "Do you need help unpacking?"

"Nah, I'll do it after you leave. It will help me keep my mind off of how much I miss everyone."

Sodapop nodded his head. He reached over and scooped up the newspaper from my bed into his hand. "Do me a favor?"

I looked down at him. "What's that?"

"Read me the article about you in the paper before I go?"

"Sure, why not." I said with little enthusiasm. I sat down on the bed close to my brother, unfolded the newspaper and read. "Ashford Academy's newest student, Scout Curtis, is the first scholarship recipient in Ashford history, but that's not the only thing that makes her unique from your average Ashford girl. Curtis is not just a groundbreaker; she is a survivor and a hero. Orphaned just fourteen months ago…" After finishing the article I folded up the paper and looked at my brother. "They didn't miss a thing."

"How did they know all that?" Soda asked.

"From articles in the Tulsa newspaper, he has a friend in Tulsa who sent him everything he needed The Journalism teacher had them all before I left. He asked me to talk with the girls for article, but I told him I didn't want to. I asked him not to write the article, but he told me he was going to with or without me."

"Well, I thought it was a great article. It's pretty cool to know you are such a big deal here."

"It's not that big of a deal to be a big deal because you're a poor orphan girl."

"That article said more about you than that!" Soda argued with me, "it said you were a hero and super smart and a good sister and all."

"Yeah, I guess it did." I hesitantly agreed then changed the subject. "I suppose we outta head on down for lunch."

"Yeah, I suppose we better," Sodapop agreed. He stood up from the bed and offered me his hand. I accepted and my brother pulled me up to my feet. The two of us headed downstairs and met up with Mrs. Dillard who was patiently waiting alone for us in the parlor room. For a moment I was tense about the conversation he may be waiting to have with me, but she didn't say anything about what she and Mr. Donaldsen had discussed.

Walking into the dining hall with Sodapop by my side was like walking in with Davy Jones on my arm. Not only was Soda a young man, which is a rarity at Ashford, but he was the newest teen idol for the swarm of girls collected inside.

I felt uncomfortable with all the eyes upon us, but Mrs. Dillard and my brother were oblivious to the amount of attention we were attracting on our way to the lunch counter to pick up our trays of food. Next we collected our glasses of milk and turned to search the crowd for available seats.

I led my company to a table in the back corner of the dining room. It was the same spot where I had eaten several meals in solitude, but today was different. With Sodapop Curtis at my table our lunches and conversation were constantly interrupted with introductions by some Ashford girls I had never met and some I was glad to see again.

"Welcome back, Scout!"

I looked up to see Maria Kinsely and a few of her friends had stopped by to greet us.

I smiled. "Thanks."

Maria grinned and glanced towards my brother. "Hi, I am Maria Kinsley, you must be Scout's brother, Sodapop."

Sodapop flashed his charismatic smile. "Sure am."

Maria and the girls giggled with excitement. "Well, it's a pleasure to meet you, and it's a pleasure to have Scout as a sister of ours at Covington House."

"Thank you," Sodapop replied and looked towards me for a social cue of what to do or say.

"We'll let you get back to your lunch together," Maria said as she realized the other girls were too shy to bother to introduce themselves. "Again, it was a pleasure to meet you in person, Sodapop."

I think I heard a collective sigh from the group of girls.

Maria looked to me. "Scout, you be sure to sit with us tonight at dinner. Okay?"

"Okay." I replied in agreement as the girls walked away.

"She seems sweet." Mrs. Dillard replied.

Sodapop looked around the room and he whispered to me. "So which girl is your roommate?"

I looked over my left shoulder and pointed out Lacey and her gaggle of girlfriends sitting across the room.

Sodapop's smile grew wide. "She's pretty!"

"Sodapop!" I scolded.

"Don't worry, I'm not interested, but she is pretty good looking." Sodapop said then he noticed Lacey look his way. He waved across the dining room to my roommate with raised eyebrows and a wild grin.

Lacey looked away in disgust and seem agitated with all the attention the newspaper article and my brother had afforded me.

I quietly laughed. More than once I tucked my short locks behind my ear, smiled, and looked her way to find her staring back with a jealous glare.

I ate my food as slowly as I could, but there was no avoiding Mrs. Dillard finally having to say, "We better get going, it's a long drive back to Tulsa."

Reluctantly, after lunch I led my guests across campus to the parking lot. The three of us stopped by the main building again so Sodapop could collect a handful of copies of the Ashford Academy Journal to take back to Tulsa. Then we headed to the car where my social worker wished me luck and assured me she and Mr. Ottavi will do what they can to convince the judge to allow me the opportunity to return to Tulsa if I wished. She also shared her opinion that Ashford seemed like a safe and wonderful place where I would no doubt succeed in life. I smiled and assured her there was no place I would rather be than home. I also thanked her for allowing my brother to come along and see the school. Mrs. Dillard smiled and climbed behind the wheel of the car.

I looked up at Sodapop who was standing next to me on the sidewalk.

Soda looked at me and forced a smile. "I don't want this to be a teary eyed goodbye. Okay?"

I smiled hard to be sure to hold back any sad emotions. "Okay."

Sodapop looked around at the scenery behind me, then he looked at me. "This is a beautiful place. It's everything I could ever wish for you, and you belong here just as much as all the other girls do."

I smiled and nodded to agree with him to make him believe I would be happy here. My brother stepped towards me and gave me a tight hug. Then he walked over to the car and opened the passenger side door. He looked at me and kept a grin on his face as he told me, "I love you, be good."

I kept the fake smile on my face and answered back, "I love you too. Tell Darry and Ponyboy I love them."

"Will do," Soda simply said as he climbed into the car and shut the door. He and Mrs. Dillard waved goodbye one last time through the windshield and then the social worker pulled the car out of the parking spot and down the lane.

I stayed still on the sidewalk and watched them drive away until the car was well out of sight. There was a big part of me that thought they would turn around and return to get me, but they never did.


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter Forty 

I looked around at the quiet campus and it felt much different than the first day I had arrived. The place was now familiar and far less intimidating than it had originally been. It was almost as if I belonged there. I knew that even if I seemed to be fitting in, I didn't want to. I still would have preferred to be home in my rough, noisy, run down neighborhood.

Thinking about Tulsa made my mind drift off to the pictures in the Ashford Academy Journal. I walked over to the main hall, grabbed two extra copies of the newspaper, and retreated to the brief solace of my dorm room.

Once inside I grabbed the sharp scissors from Lacey's desk and carefully cut out the pictures of my family and friends. I arranged them on the cork board affixed to the wall on my side of the room, and after I was happy with their placement I eyed my suitcase.

I spent the rest of my quiet time unpacking. With each item I unpacked my heart grew heavier. I wanted nothing more than to get away from my loneliness and be back with my brothers. Just as I finished unpacking I heard the final school bell ring. I sighed heavy and knew Lacey and her minions would be waltzing through the door in a few minutes to continue their taunting of me for their own amusement.

I sat down on my bed and grabbed a school book so I could pretend to be reading when they arrived. When the wooden door to my room creaked open I buried my attention to the words on the page and didn't look up.

"Scout!" Maria's voice rang out, "it's good to have you back! I think Lacey was really missing you."

I looked up and my smile matched the sarcastic smile on my new friend's face.

Maria's friend Karen came up to me with her thumb hitched up to her lips as if she were doing an interview. "Tell us Scout Curtis, how do you manage to live in a house full of the finest looking boys in all of Tulsa?"

I laughed out loud with the other girls.

"Seriously, how do you do it?" Karen asked in amazement as she sat on the edge of my bed. "Your brother, Sodapop, is the sweetest looking thing I have seen in a long while."

"Just because he looks sweet doesn't mean he is sweet." I answered with a grin.

"What are you talking about?" Maria's friend with curly red hair questioned me as she leaned against the dresser at the end of my bed. "He rode all the way here to help move you back in."

"Yeah, that's more than my older brother would ever do for me." Maria said and her friends agreed with her.

I shrugged my shoulders. "Well, he is real sweet, but he's still my brother and he can be real sour when he wants to be."

"Awe hell girl, I bet at home you got it made." The red head, Heidi, drawled out. "It's no wonder you don't like it here."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

Heidi stated, "From what I've read it sounds like those brothers of yours take extra good care of you."

"They probably spoil you like a baby." Maria said with a smile.

Her comment made me think of all the times Mom, Dad, and Darry had called me 'baby girl'.

"Yeah," Karen added, "I bet you are as spoiled with affection as Lacey McGovern is with money."

"I'd take affection over money any day." Maria said to the agreement of her friends.

I looked over at her. "Well, if you put it that way, I am spoiled rotten."

"Spoiled rotten and lucky!" Maria called out from where she was sitting at the end of my bed.

"Why lucky?" I asked

"How`bout this for starters," Heidi started her list. "You've escaped possible death at least twice, you're a bon a fide hero, your boyfriend is Owen Jasper, you have a scholarship to Ashford Academy, and you've got one of the best looking brothers in all the land!"

"And that Sodapop is as fine as they come!" Karen said while I blushed.

"Any chance of him coming back to visit soon?" Maria swooned.

I shook my head. "No time soon. Mr. Donaldsen told me I have to finish my punishment from sockin` Lacey in the face. I have ten more days with no phone calls and no visitors."

"He can come visit me!" Maria laughed and the other girls giggled with her.

"Come on, let's get out of here and go have some fun before dinner and study hour!" Karen said as she stood up and yanked at my sweater.

"Okay." I agreed and slipped on my shoes.

Before we left the room Lacey and Tucker strolled in with their arms full of schoolbooks. I watched Lacey's line of sight as she noticed the new pictures hanging on my board. I was surprised she didn't have an instant comment to share about how I probably couldn't afford the original pictures.

Instead she dumped her books on her bed and noticed the framed picture of her an Owen laying face down on her satin comforter.

"Were you looking at my picture?" Lacey demanded an answer.

I smiled easy and replied, "No, I never touched it. Sodapop did and that boy never does well at picking up after himself!"

My girlfriends giggled and headed out into the hallway.

With amusement I bid my roommate and her friend adieu, "good to see you again ladies!" Then I disappeared down the hall with my new set of friends.

My first day back to boarding school had proven to be more enjoyable than I had ever imagined it could be, but first night back was a different story.

Once Mrs. Lemon called for lights out I lay in my bed and the quiet calmness of the campus gave my mind too much time to wander. I listened to the tick tock of Lacey's bedside clock and became haunted by the horror of the lies James may say about me if his attorney's should choose to put him on the stand. My horror morphed into fear as the minutes ticked by and I thought about how James could win the court case and walk out of the courthouse a free man. Once free, he would be allowed to do whatever he wanted to anyone at anytime.

Trying to shake the idea from my head I rolled over and stared at my roommate in her peaceful slumber. Trying to gain the same results, I closed my eyes and told myself there was no way James would win. I told myself that the truth would prevail and James would find himself locked up tight in a jail cell somewhere with someone. Then I subconsciously tortured myself as I began to think that James Young and Duke Dobbins could end up in a jail cell together. My mind spun with crazy ideas of how the two of them could plot together to destroy me or my family. I knew I couldn't let that happen as I drifted off to sleep.

That night I dreamt I left my room at Covington House and walked to the mail room in the main building. I looked in my mailbox and found a document from the Tulsa County Courthouse. I was almost giddy thinking I had received a letter declaring James had been found guilty of all charges. I was sure he was headed to prison and I was headed back to live with my brothers. I opened the official letter and was stunned by what was written inside. In my hand I held an official letter from the office of the Honorable Judge Ralph Carlson declaring Darry unfit to care for me. I was officially an orphan and being listed as available for adoption. I was devastated! I couldn't imagine living with any other family in any other town, so with nothing to lose, I set off to find my way back to Tulsa to hide out in my own home.

Without packing a thing, I ran across campus and through the woods on the outskirts of Ashford. I jumped into the river and swam across to the other side just in time to hear the freight train and its steam engine rumbling towards me. I pushed my way through the prickles of the briar patch and hid behind an old oak tree close to the tracks. As a puddle of river water formed at my feet I waited for the steam engine to pass by and be out of sight before I attempted to hop into one of the empty boxcars.

'Clickity klack, Clicktiy klack', the train was passing by a little faster than I had anticipated. I pulled up the sleeves of my wet uniform sweater, and remembered what Dally had once taught me about how to jump on board a train. I could hear his voice say, "listen to the rhythm of the train to determine if it is slowing down, picking up speed, or maintaining its pace." I closed my eyes and determined the train speed. Next I remembered Dally telling me, "you've got to look way down the track and pick a specific point where you want to jump on." I looked down the track at the line of railcars and locked my vision onto one particular orange colored boxcar. It was at this moment that I remembered Dally's final instructions, "don't miss or the train will suck you under and grind you up into little hamburger sized pieces." I shook the morbid thought from my head and kept my gaze fixed on the target I had chosen. As the car grew near I began the difficult task of running alongside the train. Soon the orange metal ladder welded to the side of the boxcar that I had chosen was within my sights. I reached for it once and missed. Speeding my feet below me I reached up a second time. With a firm grasp on a metal rung I pulled my body from the ground and clung to the side of the train.

I had made it onto the train, but I knew I couldn't ride all the way to Tulsa clinging to the outside of the filthy metal boxcar. Now I needed to figure a way inside without falling off and making myself into ground beef! Carefully I reached for the edge of the open doorway. With one hand and foot on the metal ladder and the other hand and foot wrapped around the edge of the door I attempted to muster up enough guts to pull myself inside. I had resolved with myself that I would attempt the entrance on the count of three, but before I could finish my count a strong hand reached out of the door, grabbed me by the back and yanked me into the boxcar. The force of the person's pull threw me to the metal floor of the train car and before I could look up I heard that ever familiar laugh, "ha, ha, ha, ha, ha."

I lifted my line of sight to find Dallas Winston standing before me in his black leather jacket with a cocky smile.

"Christ almighty, Scout. Were you planning on hanging out there all the way to Tulsa?" Dally asked then he laughed again.

I though for a moment about how much I missed his laugh then I questioned his existence. "Dally? What are you doing here?"

"You didn't think I was going to let you jump this train all alone, did ya?" Dally sauntered over to a stack of wooden crates in a darker area of the boxcar. "Me and Johnnycakes here just wanted to be sure you didn't have to travel alone."

I stood up and tried to keep my balance as the train car swayed back and forth. My eyes adjusted to the dim light in the boxcar and noticed Johnny Cade sitting on the boxes with his shy little grin.

"Come on, Scout. You know we wouldn't ever make you have to do this trip by yourself." Johnny assured me.

I released a huge sigh of relief and ran to my friends and hugged them both, Johnny first and then Dally.

"Whoa, whoa," Dally said gruffly, "you don't need to be slobbering and stuff all over us. Besides, you're soaking wet!"

I let go of the boy at his request.

"And you smell like a wet dog." Dallas finished his comment and laughed out loud at himself.

I ignored the dig, and took a step back to look at the two of them. They looked as rough as they did everyday of their lives. "I just can't believe my eyes!"

"Well, we can't believe the run of bad luck you've stumbled into." Johnny said with a sweet concern.

The train rocked me sideways. I stumbled a little then choose to sit down next to Johnny on the wooden crates.

"You aint a woofin!" I simply said.

"You don't need to worry about all that no more. Me and Johnny here are gonna take good care of you till you're old enough to take care of yourself." Dallas said as he struck a match on his Saint Christopher medal and lit another cigarette.

"I appreciate that." I said quickly as my mind processed what Dallas had said. "Whoa! Wait a minute. What do you mean, till I'm old enough?"

"You don't actually think you're gonna jump off this train in Tulsa and be able to stay with your brothers. Do you?" Dallas asked.

I opened my mouth, but my words were stuck inside.

"Yeah, Scout." Johnny said softly, "You know as soon as that school calls the fuzz they are gonna head straight over to your house and haul you back."

I looked at both of my friends in panic. "No, no, no! The Judge's letter said I was going to be put up for adoption, but Kathryn Ottavi said in a letter she sent me weeks ago that she may know someone back home who will adopt me. So it'll be okay. All I have to do is get back to Tulsa to be with my brothers and Owen and they'll…"

"Owen?" Dallas interrupted in disgust of my affection for the Soc. "We're sticking our necks out for you and all you care about is that damn Soc? What about the boys? I bet the boys are worried sick about you!"

"Dally," I argued, "I never thought the boys and Casey weren't worried. I'm sure they are worried."

"Yeah, well they aint going to worry no more because Johnny and I are going to look out for ya from now on."

Johnny reached over and wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "Don't worry none, Scout. In a few years we'll head back to Tulsa and you can see Ponyboy and your other brothers again."

"Head back to Tulsa?" I yelled out and looked over at him. "This train is supposed to be headed to Tulsa! If it's not headed to Tulsa where are we going?"

"Any where we want," Dallas said with a grin, "but Tulsa."

Then the engine's train whistle blew a warning that held for a more than normal length. The train's brakes grabbed a hold of the rails beneath us and threw our bodies forward. When the inertia freed us we stood up together and ran to the open boxcar door just in time to see the large black engine around the bend strike the side of my parent's light blue car.

My body jumped from the mattress below me. I sat up in shock as I inhaled in fear. In a few seconds I realized it was all a dream and that I was still at Ashford in my dorm room with a roommate I despised even while she slept.

I caught my breath, laid my head back onto my pillow, and thought about the dream. Seeing Dallas and Johnny again felt so real. I missed them more than I ever imagined I would have.

Now that I was wide awake I found myself trying to analyze the dream. I wondered what it meant that the Judge would put me up for adoption, but Dallas wouldn't let that happen to me. I reminded myself that was exactly what Dally would have done for me if he was still alive.

Early the next morning I was the first one into the shower and the first one from Covington House ready to go to class, so I left to enjoy a stroll in the warm morning sun. As I ate breakfast I was joined by Maria and my new friends. In spite of of our giggles and chatter the dream weighed heavy on my mind as I headed off to class. I muscled through my classes, but as the day drew on I grew more and more anxious about what may have been going on in the courtroom. I hated not being able to know who was testifying and how the defense attorney may have been attempting to twist the truth.

In the evening I barely touched my dinner, in study hall I couldn't stop tapping my foot out of nervousness, and just before bed Maria let me know she had noticed.

"Scout, are you feeling okay?" She asked me in the hallway.

I smiled at her and appreciated her caring about me. "Yeah, I'm just worried about what is going on back home."

"Why don't you just call them and ask?"

"I can't, remember I'm still on punishment."

"Oh yeah," Maria said and seemed to drift off in thought. "What if we asked Ms. Lemon to call for you?" Maria grabbed me by the hand. "Let's go speak with Ms. Lemon and see if she will help."

Together Maria and I walked to the lady's office. I let my friend do all of the talking.

"Ms. Lemon?"

"Yes, my Dears, come in." The house mother replied from the chair she was relaxing in while reading a book.

"Ms. Lemon, the Covington House girls and I were talking about how miserable Scout is not being able to speak with her family in their time of crisis, and we were wondering if you could allow her to call home just for a few minutes to see how everything is."

Ms. Lemon smiled wide and put her hand over her heart. "Young ladies, I would love to do that, but I simply can't..."

Maria cried out in desperation, "but Ms. Lemon..."

Ms. Lemon instantly interrupted her, "Miss Kinsley, Please let me finish." Ms. Lemon paused to be sure the young lady intended to do so. "I can not make the phone call this evening, but I will approach Dean Donaldsen in the morning to ask for a special circumstance."

"Thank you, Ms. Lemon," Maria and I both said in unison with a smile.

The two of us climbed the stairs to find Maria's friends Heidi, and Karen in their room. We walked in and Maria tossed herself onto Heidi's bed in a huff.

Karen looked over at her, "What's shaking?"

Maria looked at her friend. "Nothing much, I was just trying to help Scout find a way to call home tonight so she could hear how the trial against that creep was coming along."

Heidi looked over at me, "too bad one of us couldn't make the call for you."

Maria sat up straight. "Wait a minute… that could work."

Heidi looked at her friend with a furrowed brow. "No it can't. You know the operator will only dial the people on our call list."

Maria continued with her idea. "That's what I mean. Why don't we all call our mothers, explain Scout's situation and have them write to Ashford and add Sodapop to our call list."

Karen laughed, "Maria, you are hopelessly in love aren't you."

Maria blushed and yelled out, "No!"

Heidi laughed too. "Maria, you are a liar, but your idea just might work. I am going to call my mom and see what she says. Scout, what's your home phone number?" Heidi handed me a pen and a composition notebook for me to write on before she skipped out into the hall to make the phone call.

One by one my new friends called home and tried to convince their parents for a letter to be sent to the school to give them permission to allow them to place and receive calls from an unknown boy named, Sodapop Curtis. Only Maria's mother agreed to do so, but it would take a few days for the letter of permission to arrive. Still, it was a step in the right direction to put me in contact with my family.

After their calls home the girls and I were sitting in Heidi and Karen's room trying to come up with a better solution to my problem when Karen loudly snapped her fingers and stood up.

"I've got it!" She declared.

"What have you got?" Maria looked up from the bed she was laying on and asked.

"Lacey and Owen!" Karen announced.

Maria looked to me and then back to Karen. "What do Lacey and Owen have to do with this?"

"No! Lacey has Owen on her calling list from when they attended that debutant ball this spring! She can call him for Scout!"

"She'll never do that" I said and looked at Karen with doubt.

"Oh yes she will!" Karen said with confidence "Her family and the Jaspers have known each other for years and there is no way she would want them to know that she refused to help."

Karen grabbed my arm and pulled me off the bed and out of the room with Heidi and Maria in tow.

The three of us found Lacey down the hall hanging out with her friends in Tucker's room. Karen barged in without knocking. "Lacey! You need to get up and call Owen Jasper to find out what's been going on in that court case Scout is worried about."

Lacey took a look at me and laughed. "No, I won't."

"Yes you will!" Karen demanded.

Lacey sat back and looked at Karen in disbelief. "You're crazy Karen. Crazy with a capital K!"

Karen folded her arms across her chest and looked down at Lacey with displeasure. "Scout Curtis has rescued young children from a burning building the least you could do for her is call Owen."

"She punched me in the face!" Lacey declared.

"You had it coming to you!" Karen sassed back as the tension in the room began to grow.

"Ladies, please!" Maria intervened to keep the girls from getting into a full blown argument that would grab the attention of other Covington House girls or Ms. Lemon. "The Jaspers and the McGoverns have vacationed together in the Carolinas for more than a decade. Mr. and Mrs. McGovern love Owen like he is one of their own. Imagine how upsetting it would be for Mrs. McGovern to hear from her darling Owen this summer that her little girl refused to help him be in contact with the girl he loves. Tragic!"

The room was silent as Lacey paused a moment to decide if Maria's story held any merit.

Karen sang out, "time to make that phone call!"

Lacey rolled her eyes in disgust. "Fine, let's get this over with." She hopped off the bed and went to the phone in the hallway.

My friends and I stepped into the hall to eavesdrop on the conversation.

I found myself becoming very envious of Lacey the she would soon be able to hear Owen's voice and I would not. I wondered if Lacey would consider allowing me to listen in or speak to my boyfriend, but even if she did the risk might lead to further trouble for both of us, so I didn't ask.

Lacey picked up the receiver and spoke to the operator on the other end. "This is Lacey McGovern at Covington House and I would like to be connected with Owen Jasper." During the connection pause Lacey looked my way.

From across the hall I could faintly hear the sound of ringing coming from the receiver. Lacey turned away from me, but I could still hear her side of the conversation. "Hello Mrs. Jasper, this is Lacey McGovern calling to speak with Owen... I'm doing very well, thank you for asking... Yes, mother and father are well too... Of course I look forward to seeing you in the Carolinas again this summer... No, no need to tell him I called..."

Karen realized Lacey wasn't fully holding to her agreement. Karen loudly cleared her throat to gain Lacey's attention.

Lacey grimaced with displeasure, but she followed through. "Mrs. Jasper, could you please tell Owen that Scout Curtis says hello...Yes she is... She is also wondering how the court case is proceeding... I see, okay I will let her know... She can not use the phone for another week, school rules... Yes, mam' that is a shame... I will let her know, have a nice evening."

As the phone call ended I began to realize that Lacey could be very sweet if she chose to be.

"Well?" Maria demanded a report as Lacey hung up the receiver.

Lacey looked over at me. "Owen wasn't home. He was downtown shopping with a girl named, Charlotte."

My stomach turned just a little sour at the sound of the girl's name, but I didn't let it show on my face.

Lacey continued with her report, "Owen began his testimony today. Mrs. Jasper said he should be done by tomorrow and then your older brother should testify before the jury goes into deliberations."

My stomach grew even sourer as I realized it was almost judgment time for James Young, and for me by proxy.

I looked at my roommate. "Thank you for making the call Lacey. I really appreciate it."

Lacey stared at me and for the first time since we met she was civil towards me as she responded, "I do hope that boy gets sent away to prison."

I smiled, "yeah, me too."

Lacey walked back down the hallway to her friend's room and I followed my friends to their room in the opposite direction. As night fell we chatted softly about how surprised we were with Lacey's small act of kindness.

At bedtime, I returned to my room where Lacey was reading in her bed. I noticed the feeling of tension seemed diminished and when I said 'good night' Lacey even said it in return.


End file.
